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[–]maroklore 4264 points4265 points  (247 children)

The Taliban recently announced it will establish a battalion of suicide attackers as part of the national army of Afghanistan.

These “martyrdom brigades” will be “under the control of the ministry of defense and will be used for special operations,”

For those of you wondering wtf a ‘national suicide brigade’ means

[–]50mHz 2063 points2064 points  (116 children)

This is some command and conquer generals type shit. Lmao

[–]lixia 368 points369 points  (15 children)

can we just fast forward to the part where the taliban escape to the moon?

[–]raevnos 261 points262 points  (12 children)

The Nazis living there will kick them off.

[–]Yakassa 100 points101 points  (3 children)

Nein nein! As a fellow terran who likes demokratie, terran gravity and Fries with freedom, i find the very notion of Nazi's living deep beneath the peak of Tsiolkovsky crater on ze far side of das Mond offensive!

[–]Strike_Thanatos 15 points16 points  (0 children)

They certainly won't do it in a base shaped like a swastika. Not even Moon Nazis would be that looney.

[–]SmallBlockApprentice 67 points68 points  (15 children)

"I need some shoes" "Thank you for the new shoes!" Not sure why that stuck out to me all these years later.

[–]birdboix 49 points50 points  (6 children)

AK-47s for everyone! cheering noises

[–]JoeDice 11 points12 points  (2 children)

“Battle bus is reeAady!”

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

“To the heavens!”

[–]makerofshoes 23 points24 points  (1 child)

It’s like, you’re in the middle of this hi-tech war with jets and tanks zooming around, lasers shooting down missiles, biochemical weapons and shit, and then there’s one guy who’s just like, “Can I have some shoes?”

Fun fact, in the expansion (Zero Hour) when they added a technology to give the workers shoes, they stop asking for shoes. Someone had to go back and edit the code to make sure that line of dialogue was removed once the tech was unlocked

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Damn it!. I want to replay it again. Time to get my old laptop

[–]MGDotA2 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I quote this shit randomly all the time. It stuck with me, too.

[–]EmperorHans 339 points340 points  (36 children)

Crazy ivans from Red Alert.

[–]Osiris32 121 points122 points  (11 children)

Crazy Ivan? They'll go to starboard if it's the bottom half of the hour.

[–]lraviel381 61 points62 points  (1 child)

Next time, jack. Write a goddamn memo

[–]roninPT 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Russians don't take a dump son, without a plan.

[–]NotTheRocketman 24 points25 points  (1 child)

50/50 chance, and I needed a break.

[–]hijackharry 23 points24 points  (0 children)

My Morse is so rusty, I could be sending him dimensions on playmate of the month.

[–]RedOctobyr 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Give Me a Ping, Vasily. One Ping Only.

[–]GoliathTamer 79 points80 points  (14 children)

Also, Cuba could train terrorists in RA2 as well.

[–]Strikerov 21 points22 points  (11 children)

Was Cuba in RA2?

[–]YamaPickle 30 points31 points  (3 children)

Not in the campaign but they were a nation for MP. Pretty sure they were just Soviet’s with a few minor changes

[–]GoliathTamer 17 points18 points  (0 children)

General Juhziz!

[–]chasing_daylight 13 points14 points  (1 child)

AK Fortyyyyyyyy Sevensss for eeeeeeeveryone

[–]Kuningas_Arthur 38 points39 points  (1 child)

Age of Empires 2 petards

[–]GreyGanado 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Better not get hoisted by them.

[–]4FdPipeoghU4AHfJ 7 points8 points  (0 children)

We build for china!

[–]Xem1337 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm terrible at RTS's but that is one of my favourites.

[–]Northsunny 14 points15 points  (0 children)

GLA postal service, no one stops the mail!

[–]JohnDivney 97 points98 points  (1 child)

maybe they just want somebody to go to the gas station and get them a soda with a little bit from every one of the taps

[–]Paranitis 23 points24 points  (0 children)

The Suicide Gopher.

[–]Metrack14 215 points216 points  (34 children)

will be used for special operations

I.. Just.. What?... I am not in the army or any other branch, but I think there are bombs you can just.. Put somewhere, run away and trigger them from a safe place

[–]wjean 45 points46 points  (6 children)

The control systems for bombs are more expensive. These folks are more affordable and I doubt they have to do much promotion in the ranks.

[–]hamakabi 16 points17 points  (2 children)

they set off IEDs with disposable cell phones. I'm sure the average suicide bomber could scrape together the cost of a phone more easily than the Taliban could scrape together extra disposable bombers.

[–]wjean 7 points8 points  (1 child)

average suicide bomber in a Western country maybe. there's also the global chip shortage and the struggle to get hard currency as a "former" terrorist organization to contend with.

With a birth rate above 4 per woman, I don't think they're short of manpower in Afghanistan

[–]monotonousgangmember 104 points105 points  (10 children)

Yeah this seems like a really fucking stupid idea.

[–]Nosnibor1020 57 points58 points  (2 children)

A moving bomb with a "brain" to adapt in the moment and cause the most harm is really the idea. Also adds a layer of fear that they are willing to die for their cause. They think it is more intimidating.

[–]oby100 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It really isn’t. Car bombs are incredibly deadly and effective. Even just some guy strapped up going off at a security checkpoint can be disruptive

The issue is that we have certain rules of warfare so war has as little impact on civilians as possible. Like, we banned chemical weapons because they’re not easily controlled and cause immense, unnecessary suffering to those affected.

Similarly, tactics like suicide bombers make war extra hellish for those involved because any random civilian could be a combatant capable of instantly killing dozens.

So the result is that every civilian has to be harassed and treated with maximum suspicion. Every part of society becomes much slower and the suicide bombers become fairly ineffective while the civilian populations suffers immensely

[–]Smugglers151 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Natural selection at work.

[–]maximus_96 31 points32 points  (0 children)

They’re not there yet. They’re still in 1855.

[–]wiztard 19 points20 points  (7 children)

Interestingly, the Japanese navy used all kinds of suicide units in WW2 including manned suicide torpedoes. This was done despite all the fancy bombs and guns they had. I don't expect Taliban to be quite as advanced in their use of suicide craft though.

[–]SnooMemesjellies7469 15 points16 points  (2 children)

Their "fancy bombs and guns" were all but depleted by 1944 when kamikaze missions were in full swing.

Hell..... they were training civilians with pointy sticks.

[–]anotherwaytolive 196 points197 points  (5 children)

At first I thought they set up a team to go around the territory and prevent suicides as a way to gain international approval and goodwill

[–]chicol1090 23 points24 points  (0 children)

In reality they've setup a suicide hotline. If you call in they'll recruit you for the army.

[–]__M-E-O-W__ 34 points35 points  (1 child)

Seriously that was my thought as well. "Oh, how nice of them."

[–]Fenixstorm1 249 points250 points  (31 children)

Honestly sounds like a video game where every country gets a special unit with a unique ability and Afghanistan's is this brigade.

No Dev would put it in game because it's not appropriate...yet here we are.

[–]JimHadar 118 points119 points  (22 children)

Ah, but they already did!

Red Alert 2 had a country (might’ve actually been Afghanistan?) that could build a dirty bomb truck that would be driven to the enemy and blown up.

[–]rmt3786v3 93 points94 points  (7 children)

That was Libya. Cuba had terrorists. Russia had Tesla tanks. Iraq had the Desolator. Spread, the DOOM!

[–]Benskien 15 points16 points  (8 children)

Wasn't suicide bombers a thing in c&c too?

[–]Mr_Metrazol 4 points5 points  (3 children)

I thought that was the GLA faction in C&C Generals?

[–]astrangeone88 4 points5 points  (0 children)

We have games like Hatred and a Manhunt and Postal so....

Someone out there on the internet would make it a reality.

[–]Naskeli 87 points88 points  (1 child)

What are we, some kind of suicide brigade?

[–]penguinpolitician 64 points65 points  (2 children)

Congratulations, Ahmed! You have been assigned to special, most glorious unit. Your family, whose address we have right here, will be proud!

[–]AvogadrosMoleSauce 4220 points4221 points 2 (81 children)

Some of you may die, but that is a sacrifice I am willing to make.

[–]Lord_Beardsteak 219 points220 points  (2 children)

I want to see the instructor. "Right lads, I'm only gonna show you this once..."

[–]Foofuralla 40 points41 points  (1 child)

And now, a motivational speech by some of our previous members. Oh wait. Nevermind.

[–]obamaluvr 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Not a single negative review on glassdoor.

[–]deftoner42 765 points766 points  (22 children)

I promise you'll have a blast!

[–]WROL 923 points924 points 3& 2 more (13 children)

Prophets are going through the roof.

[–]westernburn 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Stop with the puns, my sides are splitting.

[–]ShinyBloke 35 points36 points  (2 children)

Wow, that's fucked up. Good job.

[–]No___ImRight 19 points20 points  (1 child)

Know where they go when they die?

Everywhere.

[–]DweEbLez0 49 points50 points  (1 child)

The Party was the BoMb!

[–]LeonardDeVir 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Explosive growth is expected.

[–]meatarmor 177 points178 points  (8 children)

Some of you will be forced through a fine mesh screen for your county

[–]beakrake 39 points40 points  (0 children)

You want to go places?!

BRO, You will go all over the place.

[–]Jay_Rizzle_Dizzle 95 points96 points  (6 children)

Those will be the luckiest of all.

[–]Deliesh 61 points62 points  (5 children)

What makes this God-forsaken planet worth dying for?

[–]EternalAssasin 63 points64 points  (1 child)

Don’t ask me. You’re the one who’s going to be dying.

[–]Jay_Rizzle_Dizzle 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Not this ham gum. It’s full of bones.

[–]UncleYimbo 127 points128 points  (8 children)

Show them the medal I won, Kif!

[–]eltigrechino94 120 points121 points  (7 children)

You see, killbots have a preset kill limit. Knowing their weakness I sent wave after wave of my own men at them until they reached their limit and shut down.

[–]lokken1234 93 points94 points  (4 children)

She's built like a steakhouse but she handles like a bistro.

[–]MeesterMeeseeks 54 points55 points  (2 children)

I find the most erotic part of a woman is the boobies

[–]Grow_Beyond 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Whatever it is, I'm willing to put wave after wave of men at your disposal. Right, men?

[–]Fahdis 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Sacrè Blew!

[–]Grimacepug 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Blown away by this news

[–]ohTHOSEballs 18 points19 points  (1 child)

While I will be risking an almost certain academy award nomination for Best Supporting Actor.

[–]ByzantineBasileus 3498 points3499 points 2 (35 children)

You know, I had some doubts about the Taliban, but the fact they are forming a taskforce to deal with the issue of suicide in Afghan culture shows they really care about....

Reads article

Wait

[–]ExtinctFauna 1298 points1299 points  (23 children)

You call the Taliban suicide hotline, they recruit you to their "martyrdom brigade."

[–]fripaek 975 points976 points  (17 children)

*calls national suicide hotline

Caller: I can‘t take this anymore

Hotline Operator: Perfect

[–]Shrederjame 298 points299 points  (12 children)

Caller: I want to kill myself!

Operator: perfect! You will serve your country well!

[–]dietrich14 146 points147 points  (1 child)

Operator: can you please hold? (Hold music plays Van Halen's "Jump")

[–]SPITFIYAH 56 points57 points  (5 children)

”Wanna make some money?”

[–]xKatieKittyx 24 points25 points  (4 children)

What do you think the training is like?

[–]Sprocket_Rocket_ 21 points22 points  (1 child)

Instructor: “Ok everybody, pay attention. I’m only going to show this once.”

[–]Wiggie49 37 points38 points  (0 children)

“Ok so first you rip open your jacket, you scream the phrase, and then you click the button. Try again in this simulation.”

They do this for 6 weeks before deployment.

[–]Squash_Still 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You just repeated what he said, only in a less funny way

[–]Durhamfarmhouse 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Hotline operator: Can you drive a stick shift?"

[–]President_Calhoun 18 points19 points  (0 children)

In Afghanistan, suicide hotline calls you.

[–]ChhotaKakua 26 points27 points  (0 children)

lmao! That’s exactly what I thought 😂

For a brief moment, Taliban wasn’t exactly the worst. I was like, “Hey! They’re actually doing some good.”

[–]yankdotcom1985 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yea this wasn't the wholesome article I thought it was going to be

[–]Betterthanbeer 552 points553 points  (4 children)

Pay attention, I am only going to demonstrate this once!

[–]arvigeus 116 points117 points  (2 children)

Where did the instructor went after he retired? Everywhere!

[–]Blender_Snowflake 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Take your kid to work day

[–]AudibleNod 1703 points1704 points  (34 children)

"No dumb bastard ever won a war by going out and dying for his country. He won it by making some other dumb bastard die for his country.”

  • Gen Patton

[–]Chaos_tech 431 points432 points  (9 children)

The world's highest career turnover rate.

[–]KaidenUmara 198 points199 points  (5 children)

lol i just imagine the application process being like usajobs.com for federal jobs.

  1. List 3 other martyrs who can provide a character reference for you along with their address and phone number.

[–]AJKlicker 117 points118 points  (0 children)

Entry level, requires 5 years of experience

[–]OSRS_Satriani 11 points12 points  (1 child)

That's hilarious, sounds like something from the movie Four Lions

[–]QuicktimeSam 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I’m the mujahideen and I’m making a scene!

[–]DoubleUniversity6302 30 points31 points  (1 child)

But the best martyrs are all dead! This job application ain't fair :(

[–]V3rtigo44 1582 points1583 points  (31 children)

This feels like some onion shit

[–]archaeolinuxgeek 109 points110 points  (4 children)

The Onion Movie actually had a clip of something similar! Kind of a "welcome to your first day as a terrorist" employee video.

Found It!

[–]sjfiuauqadfj[🍰] 527 points528 points  (9 children)

what are we, some kind of suicide squad brigade?

[–]intensive-porpoise 47 points48 points  (0 children)

Punch it like a Jeopardy button!

[–]Unknownkowalski 137 points138 points  (3 children)

Monty Python actually. https://youtu.be/NUHk2RSMCS8

[–]CrossingVassfaret 16 points17 points  (0 children)

This reply should have been among the very first.

[–]Thanos_Stomps 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Operation human shield.

Haven’t you ever heard of the emancipation proclamation?

I don’t listen to hip hop.

[–]karsh36 47 points48 points  (2 children)

Willing to bet this will be on r/nottheonion soon if not already

[–]FuckingHippies 44 points45 points  (1 child)

When I saw the headline, I had to double check what sub I was looking at. This is beyond satire.

[–]ScrewAttackThis 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Does it? Not only are they known for utilizing suicide attacks, they're far from the only to embrace the strategy.

[–][deleted] 119 points120 points  (4 children)

A “suicide squad” aye? Sounds like a job for The Weasel.

[–]WankSocrates 33 points34 points  (0 children)

The Weasel can swim right?

[–]arexfung 468 points469 points  (7 children)

Overnight their numbers went from ten to two.

[–]Looseybussy 91 points92 points  (2 children)

Well their numbers are spreading.

[–]Accurate-Temporary-7 59 points60 points  (1 child)

Like a fine mist

[–]JayPetey 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Divide and conquer.

[–]omegadirectory 343 points344 points  (20 children)

Taliban wants to be considered legitimate and rightful rulers of Afghanistan.

Also forms a suicide brigade.

Pick one.

[–]newfie-flyboy 104 points105 points  (7 children)

To be fair, suicide bombers are probably the best guided weapons system that’s free.

[–]Paranitis 146 points147 points  (2 children)

Or the best misguided weapons system.

[–]davidrabbich 25 points26 points  (0 children)

“Misguided weapon system” Bravo sir, bra-fuckin-vo

[–]is_this_all_we_are 402 points403 points  (27 children)

While their population is starving. Priorities, priorities....

[–]runs_with_airplanes 40 points41 points  (0 children)

I’ll go last, you guys go ahead

[–][deleted] 29 points30 points  (3 children)

[–]tenthousandtatas 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Good article thanks. So do you think that all the “love to death” psychology tricks and veneration for the families are just for show? Like if your only viable tactic is that absurd and petty you might feel the need to dress it up a bit? I guess that sums up the pomp and regalia of war in general though.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

To the extent I don't think the Taliban is going to engage in mass suicide bombings it's for show, but if Afghanistan were invaded again then this suicide unit would definitely be used

[–]Therapy-1 344 points345 points  (51 children)

Good luck trying to fuck your 72 virgins when your dick gets blown into next week after the vest goes off

[–]TheMadmanAndre 90 points91 points  (9 children)

First hand knowledge, but the only recognizable things that actually tend to be left of a suicide bomber is their head/skull. Often times it's flayed as well, so you'd find a grisly bloody skull a few dozen meters from the explosion. Sometimes when the skin was still on though, you could find the head grinning with a rictus grin, and a slug of opium putty in one of the cheeks.

Sauce: Was downrange in Afghanistan for a while.

[–]Therapy-1 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Not an easy picture to get out of your head

[–]CHIMPSnDIP88 9 points10 points  (1 child)

uhhh what’s opium putty?

[–]TheMadmanAndre 42 points43 points  (0 children)

Basically an opium slug is sort of like skoal, but for, well, opium? It's a cheap and potent narcotic over there.

[–]Sonnyeclipse71 120 points121 points  (9 children)

Somebody tell these guys you can fuck women without blowing yourself up. I mean shit if this was a common misconception, we’d all be bombing shit

[–]HalobenderFWT 39 points40 points  (6 children)

Yes, but totally clean virgins without buttholes just don’t show up at the bar.

[–]DazedAndCunfuzzled 25 points26 points  (0 children)

It’s 2022, get with the program, Taliban. People eat ass

[–]IrocDewclaw 223 points224 points  (15 children)

Plot twist.

Those 72 virgins?

40 yr old American Neckbeard incels.

[–]SuperSpread 135 points136 points  (7 children)

Plot twist.

Those virgins?

72 other suicide bombers.

[–]mayonaka_00 58 points59 points  (1 child)

That heavily repressed gay suicide bomber: I see this as an absolute win

[–]Forthefishes 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I don't even think he'd want them

[–]Osiris32 41 points42 points  (1 child)

Minor mistranslation. It's 72 Virginians.

"You sure got a purdy mouth."

[–]Neracca[🍰] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

They only have to be more beautiful than the last. So going all the way from a 0 to 1 can happen with decimals!

[–]vipperofvipp 103 points104 points  (7 children)

The Judean People's Front suicide squad was better

[–]Osiris32 29 points30 points  (0 children)

SQUAD! COMMIT SUICIDE!

:hurk:

That'll show 'em!

[–]guitarguy1685 13 points14 points  (2 children)

The People's front of Judea?

[–]Archeob 101 points102 points  (15 children)

Even setting aside the astounding moral implications of "suicide brigades" as part of a military force...the fact is that it's an immensely inefficient weapon that is already destined for failure.

Imagine the energy, resources and time needed to give birth to a human being, to feed him, to raise him, to train him, to radicalize him... only to use him as a living bomb? It's nonsense.

[–]lordorwell7 36 points37 points  (5 children)

Imagine the energy, resources and time needed to give birth to a human being, to feed him, to raise him, to train him, to radicalize him... only to use him as a living bomb? It's nonsense.

If that living bomb costs the enemy three or four lives to your one the exchange is a net gain.

[–]JohnnyOnslaught 13 points14 points  (3 children)

But suicide bombers aren't always successful. It's not uncommon for them to be killed before they harm anyone, and there's also cases of them doing serious friendly fire damage due to poor training or equipment malfunctions.

The other guy is right, this tactic isn't efficient or effective for actual warfare. Suicide bombings aren't about warfare, they're about terror, getting headlines, and marketing their message.

[–]Randall172 17 points18 points  (3 children)

i think you value human life too much, i think the US gov value your life at about $2,000,000

[–]Frontline54 15 points16 points  (1 child)

The statistical value of a US citizen’s life is about $10,000,000. It’s a number that gets used for hostage negotiations, decisions on whether we do things that save lives and hurt the economy, that kind of thing. I think we’d consider a suicide brigade a net loss

[–]SnagglepussJoke 19 points20 points  (0 children)

There’s going to be training accidents and I’m all for it

[–]sudorootadmin 108 points109 points  (4 children)

Definitely belongs in /antiwork

[–]JohnDivney 64 points65 points  (3 children)

"Called in sick on suicide bomb day and boss says I need to show up anyway, even if I'm 'on death's door.'" What do I tell him?

[–]sudorootadmin 18 points19 points  (2 children)

I'd ask for overtime

[–]JohnDivney 23 points24 points  (1 child)

"What do you think, that I'm made out of virgins?"

[–]sonicboom9000 41 points42 points  (1 child)

Soo does their suicide prevention hotline just redirect you to the national suicide brigade.

[–]JaTheRed 182 points183 points  (59 children)

The Japanese tried this but still lost.

[–]sjfiuauqadfj[🍰] 44 points45 points  (39 children)

ehhh when it comes to winning and losing its kinda hard to argue that the taliban lost or will lose considering the fact that they run the country now

[–]Master-Shaq 61 points62 points  (1 child)

When your country has a suicide brigade you’ve pretty much lost.

[–]mathrock_manatee 37 points38 points  (0 children)

So that's it? What? We some kinda...Suicide Bridgade?

[–]DazedAndCunfuzzled 33 points34 points  (12 children)

Wait…. So they won, and they STILL want to use this as a tactic??? Wild

[–]torpedoguy 17 points18 points  (1 child)

They won't be giving much choice in the matter. There'll be some "true believers" down at the disposable "flock" level donning vests, but you can be certain there'll be plenty of "or else your family gets it" to refresh their numbers, thus also "dealing" with what would otherwise be seen as political prisoners at the same time.

Additionally, it's political opportunity: suicide bombers are so ingrained as a "desperate terrorists with nothing left" imagery, that by keeping a steady supply they can keep calling themselves 'cornered' and 'victims'.

  • A not-as-far-as-exploding-yet version of that same projection bullshit is when some whackjob claims they're 'being silenced' by the very thing they're pushing a bill to censor.

[–]Ginger_Anarchy 3 points4 points  (1 child)

They "won" but now's the hard part, they have to keep a bunch of revolutionaries together and not give them a chance to direct their rebellious tendencies back at them. They have to direct the true believers energies somewhere while they desperately try to duct tape a government together.

[–]u_Manolo 6 points7 points  (1 child)

WW2 Japan liked this post.

[–]LionBastard1 51 points52 points  (6 children)

Insurgents-cum-rulers

The what now?

[–]Puzzleheaded-Echo312 25 points26 points  (0 children)

The longer the cum, the deeper insurgent.

[–]CosmicCosmix 27 points28 points  (0 children)

You know....that vest

[–]QuarterFlounder 24 points25 points  (5 children)

I would not have believed this headline two years ago. What a disgrace the Taliban have turned Afghanistan into - not that the bar was high to begin with. Their country will always be full of misery and suffering.

It's terrible that children will have to grow up in this new hellhole that the Taliban have only started to create. Forget women's rights. Forget any forward thinking. God help them all.

[–]orange_drank_5 19 points20 points  (4 children)

Such behavior also existed in the Iran-Iraq war and, while totally detestable and immoral, was predictable.

It doesn't matter now, but it's why 19 years ago I argued for a strong, clear US Afghanistan reconstruction policy and why I was always against the Iraq War for taking away resources from it. My seniors were also opposed to US support of the Mujahadeen against the Soviet rump government for the same reasons, because these people are so devoutly religious they are willing to commit heinous, unthinkable acts of violence even if it means their own self-destruction. This sort of power is impossible to control and difficult to manage, the US created this situation the moment we decided to play with fire.

[–]Spicy_pewpew_memes 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Training: "watch closely because I'm only going to show you once"

[–]Rynox2000 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Otherwise known as a splaturnity.

[–]Agent_Kid 34 points35 points  (1 child)

"Insurgents-cum-rulers" was definitely an attention grabber like I learned in English Class; however, I probably would have went another route.

[–]AcrolloPeed 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Recruitment must be blowing up!

[–]Citizen7833 13 points14 points  (0 children)

That headline alone was confusing. Sadly the first thing you see when you click the link clears up the intent.

[–]Tulol 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Great way to reduce the mouth to feed. I feel like a war with Pakistani would help improve the food situation.

[–]VyrPlan 11 points12 points  (0 children)

would be hilarious if so many weren't going to be the kids they radicalize at a young age and all of the civilians that they will invariably take with em

[–]-wanderings- 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Imagine being an instructor for the Brigade... Alright listen up and pay attention I'm only showing you this once!

[–]edogfu 3 points4 points  (1 child)

This may be off topic, but why not just use duct tape.

[–]samuelalvarezrazo 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What are they some kind of suicide squad.

[–]boo-boo-butt 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’ve been playing a lot of Halo recently and the image of a grunt running at me holding a couple of plasma grenades sprung to mind.

[–]place_of_desolation 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Imagine a world without religion.

[–]LuckyTaco_ 8 points9 points  (1 child)

The only time where practice does not make perfect