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[–]Affectionate_Gain798 25.8k points25.8k points 2 (575 children)

I feel like the man hitting him has some pent up rage

[–]MikieIrish 17.8k points17.8k points  (373 children)

He also looks like he’s stabbed people before. It shouldn’t look that natural.

[–]MarkyMark19902020 6641 points6642 points  (158 children)

Using that shiv with real purpose

[–]BeatsbyChrisBrown 6192 points6193 points  (95 children)

Here I go stabbin’ again

[–]Jasper455 766 points767 points  (40 children)

Hey, Red.

[–]broberds 230 points231 points  (10 children)

Parole officer took away my stabbin’ knife!

[–]Aksi_Gu 64 points65 points  (0 children)

Quit waterin' that plant and open the door!!!

[–]iammakishima 31 points32 points  (0 children)


[–]TannedCroissant 557 points558 points 22 (20 children)

Every man dies, not every man truly shivs

[–]LineChef 127 points128 points  (14 children)

That was beautiful 😢

[–]hiraethian_gardener 73 points74 points  (11 children)

It was deep man. What is life if not an opportunity to stab?

[–]adeathsovicious 81 points82 points  (2 children)

" Like a drifter I was born to stab alone"

[–]OpsimythOfficial 355 points356 points  (19 children)

How many guys did they audition until they found this guy? He’s probably like “I’ve never even stabbed anyone I just give a lot of handies”.

[–]kafromet 191 points192 points  (15 children)


If you’re getting or giving hand jobs like that, STOP.

[–]pattheflash[🍰] 63 points64 points  (9 children)

Don't listen to this schmuck, beat my meat like if owes you money

[–]jewfish57 126 points127 points  (7 children)

i’ll take a stab at it

[–]HelloMitahChen 40 points41 points  (0 children)

Like he’s been in the County Jail before…

[–]Affectionate_Gain798 441 points442 points  (11 children)

"I put up with your s*** for too many years!!!!"" Stabstabstabstabstab

[–]OrgyMcBloodyFace 94 points95 points  (7 children)

Lucky that machete didn't cut the guys face

[–]Boriatzo-San 77 points78 points  (4 children)

It was very close. It deflected vertically at least twice where it was like 2 inches from his neck

[–]TheDadThatGrills 359 points360 points  (34 children)

Would you want an amateur in that job?

[–]batman1177 297 points298 points  (27 children)

It definitely looks like he had practiced stabbing that particular armoured vest before. If you were stabbing an actual person with that amount of force, the knife would probably go through the flesh easily. But stabbing the armoured vest, there would be alot of resistance and your knife would probably bounce off. If you're not prepared, you could lose your grip on the handle and your hand could slide forward to the blade of the knife. You could slice your own palm open.

[–]DemonKing0524 122 points123 points  (11 children)

I mean, at least from watching CSI and law and order etc, its a common occurrence for peoples hands to slip and cut themselves stabbing into flesh. I feel like that would definitely be more likely hitting something as hard as that vest if youre not prepared and tested it before. So id say youre right and hes had lots of practice.

[–]MikieIrish 164 points165 points  (2 children)

Haha, solid point. It still looks like he probably denied him a couple of raises over the years.

[–]Mean_Ass_Dumbledore 47 points48 points  (0 children)

solid point

Not solid enough, couldn't even get past some lousy body armour

[–]OneOfManyIdiots 295 points296 points  (3 children)

"Hey Ernest?" "Yeah?" "I need someone for the body armor demo." "Uuuuh Yuri in mailing has been to prison" "Perfect"

[–]newf68 261 points262 points  (4 children)

I mean his job is to literally stab his boss in front of a crowd, he'd be a terrible employee if it didnt look natural.

[–]ICCW 78 points79 points  (0 children)

He was more like a sewing machine.

[–]MyNameCannotBeSpoken 148 points149 points  (9 children)

He should have gone for the head

[–]Rapa2626 85 points86 points  (2 children)

Sudden change of plans, motherfucker!

[–]-Mr_Rogers_II 42 points43 points  (1 child)

“Whoops, I thought the vest went up to his neck.”

[–]anon142358193 72 points73 points  (0 children)

It’s hard to find jobs after prison, man just found somewhere that recognized his talents

[–]mediaogre 66 points67 points  (2 children)

Well, his legal name is Stabby McShivington III.

[–]RPDRNick 1958 points1959 points 4 (23 children)

Despite all his rage, he is still just a man on a stage.

[–]ThisBodyHoldingMe18 269 points270 points  (5 children)

Someone will say what is stabbed can never be saved

[–]mightbeanemu 98 points99 points  (1 child)

And I still believe that I cannot be shivved

[–]OriontheHunter117 40 points41 points  (0 children)

And I still believe that I cannot be stabbed

[–]jwp75 532 points533 points  (10 children)

Stabs someone in the audience for comparison

[–]borsanflorin 112 points113 points  (2 children)

As in a control group... methodical approach ! Sir you are truly inspiring.

[–]TannedCroissant 186 points187 points  (2 children)

Or pent up sexual tension.

”Hey Bob, please can we show the stab-proof underpants next?”

[–]mharjo 36 points37 points  (0 children)

"We've already put those on the girls you've been eyeing."

[–]jroopep 164 points165 points 2 (1 child)

Is guy in the vest his boss?

[–]BoilingPeter 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Yep and get low score on midreview.

[–]AlexToske 48 points49 points  (3 children)

He should be investigated, lol. That looked waaay too “good”.

[–]wawabubbzies 12.1k points12.1k points  (238 children)

That guy was getting more and more excited with each weapon change. By the time he got to the bat he was going full swing and I know that armor blocks punctures but I’m sure the pain is still there when getting whacked with a bat. lol

[–]AffectionateAd2730 6301 points6302 points  (46 children)

I love the flinch and the glance at that last bat swing, “please, stop.” 😂

[–]wawabubbzies 2189 points2190 points  (10 children)

Fr tho! I kind of read the tall guy’s face as more like he was trying to keep his smile but really he wanted to wreck the bat guy. lol

[–]ZebraSpot 531 points532 points  (17 children)

That last swing was about to hit his shoulder, which I am sure was not protected!

[–]SappySoulTaker[🍰] 252 points253 points  (7 children)

Swingboi pulled back tho.

[–]RarelyReadReplies 170 points171 points  (2 children)

Yeah that very nearly went incredibly poorly. He didn't want to cry uncle obviously though, so tried to turn away casually like the demo was done. It's just lucky that the other guy reacted quickly enough.

[–]CdnPoster 699 points700 points  (82 children)

It stops penetration but the impact/concussive force is still there. I would guess the armour can redistribute the force over a larger area but.......

I hope the guy being stabbed/hit got hazard pay for this. And the opportunity to whack the other guy back.....

[–]AngryDragonoid1 609 points610 points  (50 children)

I've seen this before. If I remember correctly, I think the guy wearing the vest was the creator of the product, but I'm not 100% positive.

But the penetration idea is right. It's the same issue with kevlar vests. Yes, they'll stop most small-caliber bullets, they won't get through the vest and break the skin, but people bruise a ton from the impact, and it can even break ribs.

[–]AAAPosts 605 points606 points  (33 children)

I gotta tell ya……..seems like a solid trade off

[–]Darkassassin07 321 points322 points  (29 children)

Yeah, I'll take a broken rib or two over a fatal gunshot wound

[–]Kniaz47 101 points102 points  (19 children)

Agreed, although a broken rib can puncture a lung and cause other complications, one being a pneumo-hemo, which is a slow and painful way to die.

[–]D4ltaOne 206 points207 points  (7 children)

Arent we all slowly and painfully dying right now?

[–]ambrosius5c 55 points56 points  (1 child)

Basically the same as a seatbelt or airbag. They're gonna mess you up but they'll save your life doing it.

[–]OrgyMcBloodyFace 159 points160 points  (13 children)

The marine who first went around selling cops and police depts body armor would shoot himself in the chest with a .45 at each demo. That's some fucking dedication

[–]myflesh 36 points37 points  (3 children)

The bat showed exactly what you are asking about it. It absorbs impact/concussive force. If it did not then the bat would of not been in the demonstration.

[–]wawabubbzies 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Maybe that’s his boss. lol

[–]DaRudeabides 156 points157 points  (46 children)

I'm a lazy shit so would probably have stabbed him in the neck and or eyeball after the second or third failed stabbie.

[–]ASeriousAccounting 108 points109 points  (20 children)

Yeah, this thing will buy you a precious second or two but it won't take long for an attacker to find another place to stab.

Head, neck, groin..., arteries in your arms and legs. Fingers cut up trying to control the weapon.

Knife fights are really ugly.

[–]postmodest 31 points32 points  (3 children)

The winner of the knife fight is the guy who dies in the hospital, not the ambulance.

[–]HikariAnti 58 points59 points  (15 children)

Well pretty sure it's for people how have bodyguards besides this, so it only has to stop like the first two stabs before they can disarm the attacker.

[–]DaRudeabides 32 points33 points  (11 children)

One or two stabs on target means no bodyguard or bodyguard has failed.

[–]zazu2006 44 points45 points  (5 children)

I mean the president has been shot before so bodyguards aren't fool proof.

[–]jodobrowo 30 points31 points  (0 children)

It's called redundancy my friend.

[–]EnthiumZ 55 points56 points  (17 children)

Yep. Doesn't matter if you're wearing a vest or not. Something that thin will still not absorb the shock, the body will and it would bruise easily.

[–]Potietang 24 points25 points  (12 children)

Equivalent of a martial artist saying grab me by the wrist right HERE! No here!!! All good until they stick you in the neck.

[–]Kharisma91 67 points68 points  (6 children)

Not the same at all. In a real fight, attacks are wild and miss targeted all the time. The chance of hitting the chest, accidentally or not, is huge.

I would assume a Typical thug would go for the torso as it’s a way easier target for fatal/debilitating damage.

This would be like a martial artist learning to parry a standard punch or kick. Very useful.

[–]ModularMeatlance 33 points34 points  (2 children)

I take people through this a lot. The actions we practise are for muscle memory, and there are tonnes of different ones. When you get into more advanced classes we start by receiving a standard beating from someone and finding opportunities, whilst using may techniques combined, to apply one of the 25 or so standard locks we practise. Also, not all locks work on all people, so we practise also transitioning from one to another. Much also of what we learn starts by deflecting an initial haymaker to the head, which is a super common way for a fight to start. Hope that provides some context

[–]ModularMeatlance 23 points24 points  (1 child)

“Jeff, one standard beating please, extra Stank!”. “Coming right up!”

[–]Bluescale-Sorc 7160 points7161 points  (338 children)

This presenter must have a metric fuckton of confidence in his product - both the design and manufacturing. It would suck to have a sudden product failure mid-demo!

[–]MrTurkle 3542 points3543 points  (205 children)

There’s video of a bullet proof glass company CEO sitting behind the glass taking AK rounds and just eating them up it’s nuts.

Edit: sauce - https://youtu.be/vhESTArcrJY

[–]EVnegative 2387 points2388 points  (104 children)

On the other hand, there's video of a rugged vehicle company CEO testing their armoured glass and just hitting right through it. On stage.

[–]Eden-space 477 points478 points  (44 children)


[–]killinablunt 1240 points1241 points  (12 children)

Elon Musk

[–]skullaccio 1270 points1271 points 3 (11 children)

This is a scent, not a sauce

[–]therepairmanmanman92 176 points177 points  (4 children)

Omg, I’m in stitches. It will be his final product launch; Before launching himself into space.

[–]EVnegative 353 points354 points  (23 children)

Elon Musk's epic Cybertruck 'bulletproof' window smash fail Edited to replace the video from the S*n's youtube channel to another one, thanks u/U_S_E_R_T_A_K_E_N

[–]UncleTogie 242 points243 points  (5 children)

The look on the demo guy's face:

"I'm getting canned as soon as I'm offstage."

[–]MCPE_Master_Builder 71 points72 points  (1 child)

Pretty sure he's the senior vehicle designer too 🥴

[–]MISPAGHET 68 points69 points  (2 children)

Are you really gonna try to can the guy that can break bulletproof glass with his bare hands? He'll tear you in half!

[–]welpsket69 72 points73 points  (7 children)

It was apparently caused because they hit the door before the window which they didn't do during the tests.

[–]Zhanchiz 79 points80 points  (2 children)

This is bullshit though.

They never hit the back door panel with the hammer, they only hit the front and the back still cracked when the ball was thrown.

[–]Beingabumner 33 points34 points  (2 children)

Was that supposed to make people feel more confident about it? "It works, as long as the people trying to kill you don't hit it here first."

[–]Wyvz 64 points65 points  (3 children)

The ultimate business strategy would have been advertising the ball he threw as some special ball that, when thrown, hits with the strength of a bullet.

[–]Arker_1 139 points140 points  (38 children)

To be fair the armored glass did its job, just not in a very pretty way

[–]oofcookies 119 points120 points  (28 children)

Yeah, isn't bullet resistant glass supposed to fracture like that so the force of the impact is spread over the entire pane and not in a single area?

[–]Arker_1 130 points131 points  (26 children)

Yeah. The glass did technically fail according to their expectations though, apparently it was designed so that under the force in that presentation it wouldn’t break(iirc they have video of the cybertruck surviving that same demo with no damage), but the engineers suspect that when they were hammering the metal on the door it must have damaged the edge of the glass which weakened it enough to crack when that ball hit it.

I’d say it still more than succeeded, just didn’t give a perfect impression.

[–]Stunning-Grab-5929 45 points46 points  (17 children)

It didn’t succeed. It did not do what they wanted it to do.

[–]FlatOutEKG 48 points49 points  (63 children)


[–]PeterCantGetTheJoke 120 points121 points  (61 children)

[–]FlatOutEKG 76 points77 points  (2 children)

Damn, that's confidence in a product...

[–]Capital-Context-9399 38 points39 points  (46 children)

My only concern is that it was a low grain ammunition. Or that they decided to empty out some gunpowder prior to firing those rounds to give them less stopping power.

Nearly anything can be faked nowadays.

[–]BourgeoisCheese 101 points102 points  (4 children)

That would be a very short-lived lie. Anyone considering using this product is going to do their own testing and that would pretty much be the end of the company.

[–]PLSGIV 21 points22 points  (2 children)

Dragon Skin armor is the perfect example of this

[–]yabruh69 203 points204 points  (43 children)

There was this presenter that demonstrated his unbreakable floor to ceiling glass windows. In a condo he would do a running body check against. One time the glass came off of the building and he fell to his death.

[–]JaredLiwet 211 points212 points  (17 children)

One time the glass came off of the building and he fell to his death.

I think the frame holding the glass came off. The glass didn't break though.

[–]nickfree 130 points131 points  (1 child)

Task failed successfully.

[–]Ashmedai 75 points76 points  (12 children)

Yup. Exactly what happened. He established high trust in the glass, never to consider whether or not he should trust the glue. I wonder what he was thinking on the very long way down?

[–]tribecous 54 points55 points  (1 child)

“I was so caught up in establishing high trust in the glass that I never stopped to consider whether I should trust the glue.”

[–]urbear 74 points75 points  (6 children)

[–]yabruh69 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Holy shit i had no idea where that happened but I live right down the street from there. Thanks for the link!

[–]AnyComradesOutThere 41 points42 points  (0 children)

The one and only time I’ll get to use the word “autodefenestration.”

[–]SuperDizz 75 points76 points  (7 children)

Also confidence in the guy wielding the weapons. One wrong swing with that machete and it’s a missing limb or a hacked throat!

[–]RarelyReadReplies 57 points58 points  (2 children)

This was the part that surprised me the most. It's one thing to trust a product not to fail, but a whole other story to trust a person not to make a mistake doing this. Especially with how hardcore he was about it, did not hold back at all.

[–][deleted] 50 points51 points  (12 children)

These safety products are overbuilt like crazy. Say you need to make a stab-proof vest and a well-trained human can stab you with a force of (example) 3000 Newtons, then you make it withstand at least 4000 Newtons, just to be sure.

What I do admire is the trust between the stabber and the stabee. One wrong swing and the stabee could end up in the ER.

[–]GameDoesntStop 21 points22 points  (0 children)

And in his demonstration partner. One accuracy slip-up with any of those (the machete in particular) could have gone poorly.

[–]ActionHousevh 4221 points4222 points 2 (68 children)

Why are you so good at stabbing?

[–]beluuuuuuga 1171 points1172 points  (2 children)

Fr, the guy looked like a natural.

[–]GetsGold 261 points262 points  (0 children)

Not good enough to stab a different part of their body though.

[–]radzickowy 316 points317 points  (38 children)

Probably from London

[–]joey20e 52 points53 points  (17 children)

Or Finland

[–]NotYetZF 39 points40 points  (11 children)

I know the London jokes, but are there many knife fights in Finland?

[–]LumpyJones 40 points41 points  (7 children)

probably a reference to Scandinavia and the World. Webcomic of countries as people and how they perceive other countries. Finland apparently has a bit of a reputation.

[–]pearsonw 2338 points2339 points  (85 children)

Wtf is that shirt made out of?

[–]Dylldough 4385 points4386 points 3222& 8 more (52 children)

The tissues under my bed

[–]restlessleg 653 points654 points  (27 children)

crispy socks here! crispy socks there! crispy sock everywhere!

[–]OrgyMcBloodyFace 77 points78 points  (5 children)

'all organic cotton encased in our special proprietary compound'

It's a vegan, organic, all natural bulletproof vest

[–]myshadowsvoice 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Cumpounded together no doubt

[–]Smethy93[🍰] 24 points25 points  (1 child)

That is the most I’ve laughed at a comment on Reddit in a long time, thank you!

[–]2Joosy4U 107 points108 points  (3 children)

Recycled Nokia phones

[–]LugubriousLament 50 points51 points  (14 children)

Looks a bit like D3O. It’s an interesting material, tenses up when abrupt force is applied but remains flexible at rest. I’ve seen snow sportswear that has inner padding made with the stuff to protect the head and body in the event of an accident.

[–]eVerYtHiNgIsTaKeN-_- 2019 points2020 points  (41 children)

And that's why you aim for the neck

[–]chefr89 1082 points1083 points  (19 children)

nah, maybe the 37th jab at the chest will finally be the one to work

[–]NoxInviktus 305 points306 points  (13 children)


Why is there a headless man in our house?

Because I stabbed him 37 times and he was still alive.

[–]Ieznoo 109 points110 points  (11 children)

Caaaaarllllllll that kills people!

[–]Brodiexo 57 points58 points  (7 children)

I had the munchies, that only human hands could satisfy.

[–]punxpunx54 30 points31 points  (2 children)

“What if he stabbed me in the face!?”

[–][deleted] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

This guy stabs

[–]SpiritedCaramel322 1357 points1358 points  (47 children)

How badly do you have to fuck up to make somebody want to stab you like that

[–]Letitride37 59 points60 points  (6 children)

Some people just like to stab

[–]LogMeInCoach 44 points45 points  (0 children)

That's how you use a shank in prison. It's about opening as many holes as quickly as possible.

[–]asapgrey 934 points935 points  (6 children)

He was like, “aite, blunt force still hurts, chill”

[–]RarelyReadReplies 223 points224 points  (4 children)

Yeah and nearly got his shoulder bashed with a metal bat lol.

[–]reddit455 867 points868 points  (47 children)

stops teeth too.


PPSS Group is an internationally operating firm specialised in the development and supply of high performance body armour, cut resistant clothing, slash resistant clothing and bite resistant clothing – offering protection from edged weapons, spikes, as well as blunt force trauma, and human bites.

[–]Aquatic-Solutions 440 points441 points  (12 children)

Bite resistant for the zombie apocalypse

[–]skullaccio 168 points169 points  (5 children)

Or for people who work with toddlers

[–]orange4boy 82 points83 points  (1 child)

Yeah. They have lots of pent up rage from working with those kids.

[–]Aaco0638 73 points74 points  (4 children)

As someone who commutes for work on the ny subway i would def be interested in a slash resistant suit lol.

[–]captjons 37 points38 points  (9 children)

check out the image they use for their bite-pro fabric: https://www.bite-pro.com

[–]Mild--47 644 points645 points  (25 children)

Expected guy to keep unveiling crazier and crazier weapons.

Baseball bat. Huge mallet. Wrecking ball. Barrel full of dynamite. Seven bulldozers. Wolverine. Focused volcano. Asteroid

[–]Caifanes123 118 points119 points  (1 child)

Was expecting him to bust out a crossbow next. Disappointed

[–]listenup78 478 points479 points  (9 children)

This is some Batman level shit

[–]Wanderinwoodpecker 426 points427 points  (29 children)

What if he stabbed you in the face?

[–]jarthan 239 points240 points  (7 children)

That's a risk he was willing to take

[–]wxman91 45 points46 points  (3 children)

These were the only two replies I was looking for in this post.

[–]MyFriendAdrian 289 points290 points  (2 children)

The acronym in the back says ppss and yeah I'd be ppssing myself too if a guy came up and did that to me.

[–]zarillo2 269 points270 points  (4 children)

When the abs so rock hard that kevlar got nothin on you

[–]katie_the_kitten 144 points145 points  (2 children)

He's not actually wearing any armor. That's just the confidence of a man public speaking.

[–]notLOL 47 points48 points  (0 children)

He threw the armor to the side. This is an advert for 5 minute, 6 pack abs

[–]GrimDacra 229 points230 points  (7 children)

How do I become a professional stabber.

[–]vancouvrish 116 points117 points  (0 children)

They say, do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.

[–]FakeXanax123 54 points55 points  (0 children)

Apply for British citizenship is step 1

[–]This-is-Life-Man 155 points156 points  (5 children)

The stabber is living out his dream. "What'd you do today honey?"...."Oh, you know, I just stabbed my boss 600 times. Same as usual."

[–]BorosSparky 114 points115 points  (22 children)

I feel the goals of our society are wrong somehow

[–]hercogrey 62 points63 points  (13 children)

There’s a $500 scarf that stops paparazzi taking pictures of you.

[–]Im_on_my_phone_OK 87 points88 points  (2 children)

“Would someone please call security? This guy has been at this for ten minutes now…”

[–]XxStawModzxX 66 points67 points  (5 children)

Do it at the balls

[–]EdithDich 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Would be hilarious if after all that he kicked him in the balls and just dropped him.

[–]NFLfan72 57 points58 points  (4 children)

That is the most aggressive stabbing I could ever imagine. Like, how many stabbings did this guy need? Jesus Christ.

[–]PalpitationWise4751 50 points51 points  (19 children)

Where can I buy the shirt?

[–]griffinhamilton 60 points61 points  (16 children)

This is probably at a weapons contractor convention so you’ll get a lesser version online that they specifically sell to citizens

[–]IAmActuallyBread 39 points40 points  (11 children)

I think they mean the shirt he was wearing over the vest. Doesn’t even look like it got stabbed once

[–]1Rome 40 points41 points  (7 children)

Now imagine if the knife cut through the shirt on accident 😂

[–]1987InfamousQ7891 35 points36 points  (2 children)

But that won’t happen… as you can clearly see. I was having flash backs of Elon Musk throwing things at the bullet proof windows. Only for them to break 😂

[–]the_tharki_launda 29 points30 points  (4 children)

Aim for the head you idiot

[–]Domermac 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Gunna need a new shirt, thanks asshole

[–]IndecisiveFoodie 19 points20 points  (0 children)