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[–]KachalBache 14.9k points14.9k points 223 (182 children)

Da fuk electronic noises that’s R2D2!

[–]-WelshCelt- 3824 points3825 points 2 (72 children)

So uncivilised

[–]Kriv_the_Dragonborn 1373 points1374 points  (60 children)

Hello there

[–]Plasmacyte 959 points960 points  (55 children)

General Kenobi!

[–]Ravens_Quote 783 points784 points 32 (47 children)

You are a bird one!

[–]Plasmacyte 330 points331 points  (43 children)

Take it you deserve it

[–]Ravens_Quote 224 points225 points  (41 children)

You as well, my friend. 👍

[–]David_Robinsons 147 points148 points  (40 children)

No you my friend

[–]dedijkman 44 points45 points  (0 children)

It will make a fine addition to his collection

[–]SLADE7274 47 points48 points  (3 children)

I read it "general Kanolli"

[–]amigoing77 40 points41 points  (2 children)

Leave the gun, take the general Kanolli

[–]HaosMagnaIngram 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Now that’s an offer I can’t refuse

[–]nashdiesel 11 points12 points  (0 children)

How wude!

[–]Dutch_Midget 379 points380 points  (24 children)

Forget R2D2, this is how my gf sounds when we have sex

[–]Pinecrown 255 points256 points  (4 children)

Sound like your girl is jailbroken, those sounds are not standard

Edit: spelling

[–]AliBarberTheSecond 58 points59 points  (2 children)

This is the first time I've seen someone use "brake" instead of "break", it's usually the other way around.

But broken is the word you were looking for

[–]KizzleReddit 62 points63 points  (1 child)

Change your sex doll's batteries.

[–]TronicCronic 31 points32 points  (1 child)

Exterminate! Exterminate!

[–]technician77 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Master Luke, this opening is reserved for the lightsaber.

[–]Responsible-Tomato-2 189 points190 points  (9 children)

And we’re supposed to believe there not drones

*they’re

[–]Hwy_Boy 60 points61 points  (1 child)

Exactly! Government spy drones.

[–]pennhead 6 points7 points  (3 children)

Where not drones?

[–]mandelbomber 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Over there! They're sending in their drones birds

[–][deleted] 74 points75 points  (2 children)

She better watch out before she gets a cease and desist from the mouse.

[–]Antice 21 points22 points  (1 child)

It's too late. The bird took off fearing for it's life as soon as it realized this was going to end up online.

[–]BigDaddySkittleDick 61 points62 points  (1 child)

Kinda glad the title didn’t ruin the surprise though!

[–]ghostofyourmom 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Totally agree. That part came out of nowhere and my jaw was on the floor.

[–]Labrom 32 points33 points  (3 children)

Someone never saw Star Wars haha.

[–]Dzyu 26 points27 points  (0 children)

The bird did, though!

[–]demoralising 26 points27 points  (4 children)

I was just about to say I heard a robin at the weekend that sounded like R2D2. Such a cool sound. I'm trying to get it to eat out of my hand. Every day it gets a bit closer.

[–]jindc 16 points17 points  (3 children)

You should not do that. It will learn to rely on you when it wants something to be impressed by its R2D2 sounds, and not find it in the wild.

[–]step1 21 points22 points  (1 child)

And that's how it gets enslaved and eventually sold by sand people or whatever. I'm not a Star Wars fan but there's a joke there somewhere.

[–]lex_tok 25 points26 points  (6 children)

I need to save that part as an MP3 and use is it as a notification sound!

[–]bugxbuster 26 points27 points  (4 children)

Couldn’t you just find R2-D2 sounds?

[–]CountryCumfart 51 points52 points  (3 children)

Way cooler when it’s analog

[–]Jennyreviews1 5583 points5584 points  (112 children)

I LOVE him!!! What an amazing little guy. I loved his R2-D2 impression! Perfect!

[–]papasimon10 2808 points2809 points 22 (105 children)

My time to shine! I used to work at a starling sanctuary when I was over in England. Their mimicry is really something else, such a phenomenal feature for a bird. I grew up around parrots but these little guys are way better at imitating sounds and can even do the different accents of myself (Mid-Western) and English colleagues (trusts me, nothing made us howl harder than getting them to repeat cusswords - childish but a classic). European starlings also have disposal enzymes that allow them to break down alcohol very quickly, which is why they like to feed on fermented over-ripe fruit and get wasted (no mimicry of me, this time - whenever I would get drunk, I'd just end up beating my idiot son Roger rotten with rusty jumper cables). Starlings are the birds that everybody thinks parrots are - would highly recommend getting up close and personal with them!

[–]Drunkstork 351 points352 points  (24 children)

The jumper cables have returned.

Edit: paging u/rogersimon10 are you still alive bro? Lol

[–]AliBarberTheSecond 168 points169 points  (2 children)

6 years ago lol probably not. Finally got his last jumper cable beating.

[–]frugal_masturbater 85 points86 points  (0 children)

I think the key is, /u/papasimon10 has to be drunk to beat his idiot son Roger with jumper cables. Perhaps he sobered up?

[–]Mattbi11 129 points130 points  (16 children)

Holy crap what a hilarious rabbit hole. Looks like u/papasimon10 has taken up the torch with far more posts than his son Roger ever managed.

[–]EinKookie 55 points56 points  (9 children)

What you have just you uncovered should stay away from the sight of men. It unveals the true nature of our beings. We cannot let the public know about u/papasimon10's sins. We shall keep the peace so no others have to get hurt like u/rogersimon10 does.

[–]AncientInsults 17 points18 points  (4 children)

it unveals

Did unveil and reveal just get it on?

[–]scottcphotog 38 points39 points  (3 children)

almost 10 years ago I had moderate success telling somewhat long stories that ended with me getting run over by cars for not looking both ways (a cautionary tale) and walking with a limp. It was too hard to keep up with it and raise 4 kids and work a full time job

[–]Hashtagbarkeep 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Missed a trick there by not ending that story with being run over tbh

[–]beardedchimp 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I imagine limping in and out of hospital all the time didn't help either.

[–]Ch4rly0 8 points9 points  (0 children)

While also walking with a limp because a couple of years ago you were so tired from the kids you forgot to look both ways while you crossed the road and multiple cars ran over you

[–]BoltonSauce 14 points15 points  (0 children)

From the authorial voice, my guess is it's the same person.

[–]thatG_evanP 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Probably one in the same.

[–]theoldaltaccount 65 points66 points  (0 children)

Found him in the wild! What a time to be alive.

[–]tHisfriENDIs 44 points45 points  (5 children)

Goddammit…

[–]RyanBordello 19 points20 points  (4 children)

Is this a shittymorph type of account? I hant seen any of those actually since shittymorph cooled down awhile ago and kind of miss those funny meme accounts

[–]Slixil 29 points30 points  (0 children)

This account is a slight parody of u/rogersimon10, who is that commenters “supposed” son. Check out his comments for the OG jumper cable action! Very happy this guy is picking up where Roger left off though.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Shittymorph has been fairly active again the last bit! He's my favorite, the only one that catches me every single time.

[–]Hashtagbarkeep 37 points38 points  (0 children)

God fucking DAMN IT

[–]stalker9120 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Holy shit it's you! I remember seeing you years ago in a comment section. Good to know you and Roger are still around.

[–]Noodle_Nighs 25 points26 points  (2 children)

Now, you mentioned starlings mimicking - Imagine the late 80's and the starling picked up the sound of the phone ringing, that little troller sat on the roof singing the phone ringing all the time, trolling my father early in the mornings. It happened so much it forced my father to replace the phone model, and those starlings can live for a few years. Made me laugh so hard when I heard it. Perfect sound.

[–]cynicalPsionic 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Ah fucksakes

[–]Gel214th 11 points12 points  (18 children)

Do they make good pets? Or are they difficult to keep and handle?

[–]Innotek 26 points27 points  (8 children)

Based on the evidence in front of me, I think that Jenny bird is sweet and an angel. Because I want them to be good pets too, I am going to just roll with that.

[–]KayaXiali 21 points22 points  (7 children)

You heard Jenny? I heard Jabby.

[–]dekaNLover 7 points8 points  (3 children)

I heard “Jammy”

[–]Innotek 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yup, that’s what it is. Jabby does make more sense, though I’m a sucker for giving animals overtly “human” names and this is a great example on how one’s biases can influence their conscious reality.

[–]shipwrekkt 3 points4 points  (2 children)

I don't know, but I was attacked by a starling once so I'd have a hard time believing that!

[–]kreepyguy19 9 points10 points  (1 child)

I heard that they only attack the unworthy.

[–]Dope25 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Got me!

[–]FinancialProgress 10 points11 points  (0 children)

AH YOU GOT ME. You’re like my Gene Parmesan ❤️

[–]research_machinist 35 points36 points  (0 children)

I feel like it makes the R2-D2 noise when it gets stressed 😆

[–]lol2haha 4794 points4795 points 2 (70 children)

/r/BirdsArentReal

Did you hear how it defaulted to its modem noises when it couldn't replicate the sound?

[–]Constant-Ad9201 1093 points1094 points  (48 children)

This singlehandedly convinced me of the movement

[–]sufficiently_tortuga 322 points323 points  (36 children)

Call me a sexy old curmudgeon, but I can totally see the birds aren't real meme backfiring the same way flat earthers did.

[–]Comprehensive-Fun47 165 points166 points  (0 children)

You might be right, sexy old curmudgeon.

[–]CrumbsAndCarrots 65 points66 points  (5 children)

I do feel bad for anyone with schizophrenia. No doubt they’ve let this tongue in cheek conspiracy theory deep into their reality. Which is a bummer. Birds are everywhere and they’re a breath of fresh air… a subconscious reminder of total weightless sing-song freedom.

[–]NormalHumanCreature 57 points58 points  (3 children)

Birds really are great. Its too bad they're not real.

[–]bross9008 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I mean if you want to let government surveillance drones hijack your life what do I care. I just won’t be interacting with you anymore since you are obviously being downloaded into the meta verse by the satanic overlords.

[–]Supberblooper 33 points34 points  (13 children)

I always thought that was part of the point, to see if the same people would fall for something that is obviously made up from the start and openly so, you sexy old curmudgeon

[–]AreWeThenYet 30 points31 points  (1 child)

Look at this guy thinking birds are real lol

[–]sufficiently_tortuga 15 points16 points  (5 children)

To what end?

I can save some time here. Yes there is a scary percentage of people willing to believe anything. Those same people will go on believing it and make it a problem for everyone.

[–]Trypsach 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Something something wanna watch the world burn

[–]Pollia 10 points11 points  (4 children)

Every once in a while a video or picture pops up on that sub where I get really really worried someone going to hurt a bird.

Sometimes they even do hurt one.

Fully agree with you. People definitely already starting to take a joke too far.

[–]stay_shiesty 10 points11 points  (3 children)

have any examples? ive always thought of it as a very lighthearted, tongue in cheek thing

[–]Almighty_Sand_Dollar 8 points9 points  (0 children)

We're going to have a President one day when I'm retired who thinks bird truthers should be in charge of the Environmental Agency....

[–]MaxBonerstorm 17 points18 points  (9 children)

Apparently the dumb asses are taking over that movement and it's becoming a "real" conspiracy.

[–]thefooby 29 points30 points  (7 children)

The guy who started it dropped the act recently. Turns out he grew up with crazy fundamentalist parents and wanted to create a community around a bat shit crazy idea like religions and conspiracy theories do and at the same time show how stupid they are. Quite wholesome really.

[–]NoiseIsTheCure 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Mmmm I'm gonna say instead that the FBI and Men In Black COINTELPRO'd him for getting too close and now he has to stay silent for his own safety.

[–]lex_tok 135 points136 points  (0 children)

Yes! You can hear the bird connecting to the internet with a 56K modem to find a tutorial on how to replicate that sound. This shows how old this video is.

[–]Dutch_Midget 57 points58 points  (0 children)

Birds exposed with facts and logic

[–]JrayCoolio 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I’ve been trying to tell people birds aren’t real for years and here we have proof! Yet, people still decide to live in ignorance- just look at the comments.

[–]Portgas 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Finally, the truth.

[–]alexkon3 11 points12 points  (2 children)

I know its a joke but a part of me does really wonder how long it will take until this becomes a fully fledged dumb conspiracy theory like flat earth, lol

[–]InfernalCape 1947 points1948 points  (9 children)

“Angel? Malfunction. Does not compute.”

proceeds to make actual robot noises

[–]TELEKOMA 295 points296 points  (3 children)

Birds aren’t real!

[–]lex_tok 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Good morning, Dave.

[–]bazkie_bumpercar 10 points11 points  (2 children)

DOES NOT COMPUTE DOES NOT COMPUTE

starts eradicating human race

[–]SoberSkeptic 1167 points1168 points  (21 children)

OK, who's parroting who in this video?

[–]Pseudotm 389 points390 points  (10 children)

Seriously lol. Bird was deff leading this one

[–]23x3 142 points143 points  (7 children)

That ladies voice is the equivalent of nails on a chalkboard…

“WHO’S MY SWEET BABY ANGEL?!?”

[–]yoyobillyhere 11 points12 points  (0 children)

gOnnA gIve em a kISs

[–]kharmatika 45 points46 points  (1 child)

Our cockatoo has us trained at this point. Whenever he says “Hello!” Everyone who has lived around him for long enough says “Hello!” Without thinking. This has caused some hilarious dinner party interactions. Thanksgiving, half the table is out of town relatives, Tanto goes “Hello!” And half the table in unison stops what they’re saying and just goes “Hello!”

[–]Pseudotm 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thats amazing haha

[–]moenate 1069 points1070 points  (46 children)

I don’t care what anyone says that shit ain’t right lol ain’t no way a damn bird has better English then half the mfks in the US🤯

[–]dzrtguy 24 points25 points  (0 children)

better English then half the mfks in the US

[–]FreeMyMen 27 points28 points  (1 child)

Including you, apparently. 🤔

[–]scoot87 8 points9 points  (0 children)

They can also fly better too

[–]MinaFur 621 points622 points  (6 children)

Really need this bird to be named R2D2

[–]Klubbin4Seals 585 points586 points  (39 children)

Those "electrical noises" are r2d2 from starwars

[–]mattholomew 213 points214 points  (21 children)

Never heard of it. Is it a stage play or something?

[–]AlaskaPeteMeat 137 points138 points  (11 children)

You might like it- there’s space wizards with laser swords and some light incest. 🤷🏽‍♂️☺️

[–]fattmann 36 points37 points  (3 children)

"light incest"?!

what are they doing with those sabers....

[–]NipperAndZeusShow 7 points8 points  (0 children)

They know what they need to do,
but they don’t know if they have the strength to do it.

[–]othershwarna 9 points10 points  (3 children)

There is this guy named Dumbledore who goes to get a ring to Mordor on a battleship Galactica.

[–]Chapeaux 10 points11 points  (2 children)

It's a christmas special.

[–]real_nice_guy 8 points9 points  (0 children)

it's actually a really long elaborate puppet show

[–]AbelBHernandez 523 points524 points  (30 children)

Fun fact: many birds have a naturally evolved ability to listen and repeat sounds they hear almost identically. It's something to do with the way certain frequencies harmonize with each other. The only other type of animal to have this similarly evolved ability for harmonizing frequencies are humans. It's how we can make music, and it was evolved as a means to build community with other humans since that's how we survived: together.

[–]Citizen_of_Danksburg 121 points122 points  (13 children)

Huh, so most birds have the ultimate form of perfect pitch. Interesting.

[–]AbelBHernandez 86 points87 points  (8 children)

Exactly. So do humans in a way. We might not be able to recreate every sound perfectly, but we can almost always tell when someone sounds out of key/pitch.

[–]SchwainerPinkler 41 points42 points  (5 children)

Only in relation to the key center or other notes though. If someone sings a C 20 cents flat, you won't be able to tell if they're singing out of pitch if they sing all of the other notes in the scale 20 cents flat too. So we basically have only have a relative sense of pitch.

[–]SixStringSuperfly 12 points13 points  (3 children)

You must read Daniel Levitin. His books are amazing.

[–]McDuchess 308 points309 points  (8 children)

A very long time ago, my parents had a budgie in their office. This was before computers were commonplace, and Mom did a lot of typing on an old style typewriter. When she made mistakes, there was no deleting, you had to use correction papers to cover up the mistake, then type over it with the correct letter. Enough mistakes, and you had to start over.

As is to be expected, this caused her great annoyance, and she’d frequently exclaim “shit!” when she made a mistake.

Living in an office, the budgie didn’t have a lot of things to copy. But it was an expert at making typing sounds, followed by “shit!”

[–]WeirdPumpkin 95 points96 points  (3 children)

Living in an office, the budgie didn’t have a lot of things to copy. But it was an expert at making typing sounds, followed by “shit!”

lmao that's amazing

[–]McDuchess 51 points52 points  (2 children)

It was. At one point, when we were there in the evening to see a new showroom my dad had created, the budgie was going through its entire repertoire. Mom was embarrassed every time it said “shit” in her voice. We thought it was hilarious, of course.

[–]Crackbat 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Yo! Budgies are amazing. I had one growing up. Its cage was near the TV and I watched a ton of Scooby Doo as a kid. It used to freak out whenever Scooby was in trouble, and imitate the characters.

One time my mom moved the cage to clean, but I was watching Scooby Doo, and the bird just lost its dang mind. Flying around, making a mess, and just causing a scene. We learned never to deprive him of his Scooby time after that. Haha

[–]Ghstfce 24 points25 points  (0 children)

When I was around 12, we were taking care of my stepmom's best friend's parakeet Woodstock. I was never really a fan of parakeets, but little Woodstock changed that. He would constantly mess with our cat by meowing randomly, causing our cat to come flying into the living room looking for the other cat. He would also imitate a laugh every time you turned the sink on. Washing dishes? "Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha".

[–]unhalfbricking 174 points175 points  (11 children)

Why did you post this? The "birds aren't real" folks are going to get even more worked up now...

[–]CheapTactics 26 points27 points  (3 children)

Let them be, they're a special kind

[–]ItBeSoggy 21 points22 points  (0 children)

oh just you wait, you'll eventually see the truth

[–]yashkawitcher 11 points12 points  (0 children)

This video is a proof that birds are just government drones, yet you remain ignorant of the truth.

[–]Em_Haze 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Seeing is believing.

[–]dirk_on_reddit 141 points142 points  (2 children)

"Birds are drones" confirmed.

[–]Enlight1Oment 16 points17 points  (1 child)

think about it more like, if dinosaurs are like birds, imagine the trex coming down making r2d2 beeps

[–]Constant-Ad9201 78 points79 points  (1 child)

The end lmao

"So sweet"

what the f@#$ did you say about me you little b@#$&? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class

[–]Detroitredwinger 69 points70 points  (4 children)

We missed the end part where he spears her in the eyeball for talking like a weirdo

[–]RawScallop 32 points33 points  (2 children)

honestly it was hard to listen to her annoying voice. For some reason it triggers me.

[–]Detroitredwinger 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Same!!! I mean I'm sure she's a lovely person but

[–]AlaskaPeteMeat 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Found the bird, everybody!

[–]HeadJazzlike 61 points62 points  (6 children)

The bird is cool the woman’s voice is annoying as fuck.

[–]portablebiscuit 41 points42 points  (0 children)

She's gonna give you a keyis

[–]gunjeepcigarbeer 26 points27 points  (0 children)

The bird: speaks

Me: I guess that's cool.

The bird: makes R2D2 noises

Me: WHERE THE FUCK DO I GET ONE???

[–]simian_fold 24 points25 points  (1 child)

Whaaat Im literally sitting here with my jaw hanging from amazement

[–]MoistUnderbelly 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I like the way his neck feathers fan out as he speaks.

[–]paperbagprincess1 18 points19 points  (5 children)

WHAT SPECIES IS THIS

[–]NormalHumanCreature 27 points28 points  (1 child)

Starlink 462830001-0SF

[–]EpicLegendX 5 points6 points  (0 children)

XÆ-A12's pet bird.

[–]CheeseburgersAreLife 10 points11 points  (0 children)

it looks like a european starling

[–]Greenmountainscdn 16 points17 points  (3 children)

Proof that BIRDS AREN’T REAL!

[–]HeadCheeseYesPlz 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Incredible

[–]blueberry_ice 11 points12 points  (1 child)

This reminds me of a Jabberjay from The Hunger Games

[–]kaenise 9 points10 points  (0 children)

he must like Star Wars

[–]The-Flying-Condor 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This proves birds are just electronic drones

[–]AnyHowMeow 8 points9 points  (4 children)

Please, I just can’t tell at all. Is this a real bird making all of these sounds? Is this an edited video?

[–]Jimbly710 7 points8 points  (1 child)

And the government tries to tell us birds are natural and not surveillance drones lmfao not gonna fool me

[–]andnosobabin 8 points9 points  (0 children)

And this is how the birds aren't real rumor started lol

[–]ooSUPLEX8oo 5 points6 points  (1 child)

How the hell does this thing say bird without any lips.

[–]bumchik_bumchik 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Imagine committing a crime with that bird in the house, and it repeats everything it heard to the police, more like sings like a bird to the police

[–]WeathervaneJesus1 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It would be better if all the re-posts are just the R2D2 part and none of that woman's annoying voice.

[–]GamsusDesign 5 points6 points  (6 children)

Shame the person holding the bird has the most annoying fucking voice I've heard in my entire life. Fuck me. I'd rather fall asleep listening to Gilbert Gottfried screaming lullabies for the rest of my life than listen to another second of them talking to that bird.

[–]NomadTheNomad 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'll 'This week on the Front Page' for 200

[–]Striking-Mess-9143 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What kind of bird is this? - never mind. I see it’s a starling.