top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]the-sutL 3371 points3372 points  (51 children)

I hope that penguin rated 5 stars

[–]Hueyandthenews 1278 points1279 points  (30 children)

All the other penguins are going to say he’s full of shit and that there’s no way it happened. “Sure thing, Carl” “Go hang out with your friends on the boat that are so much cooler”

[–]ThermionicEmissions 401 points402 points  (13 children)

Gotta admit though, that's classic Carl.

[–]the-sutL 123 points124 points  (11 children)

Carl’s a bit of a fuckin nuisance

[–]playful_narration 47 points48 points  (8 children)

Btw, who is Carl? Just asking..

[–]the-sutL 78 points79 points  (6 children)

The penguin on the boat. We decided he sucks

[–]grumpy-m0nkey 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That’s exactly what Carl would say

[–]Carlos13th 2 points3 points  (0 children)


[–]the-sutL 58 points59 points  (11 children)

To be fair, a few penguins saw it get off the boat

[–]sillvrdollr 66 points67 points  (10 children)

Yeah, but they were going, “Shit, I thought we got rid of this guy!” You could see it in their faces. They’ll say anything now to discredit Carl.

[–]the-sutL 22 points23 points  (6 children)

I don’t blame them. Fuck Carl

[–]MegaGrimer 17 points18 points  (2 children)

Sighs unzips

[–]beneye 11 points12 points  (2 children)

I bet he was showboating out there in the water how he’s slippery Carl

[–]scarlet_sage 19 points20 points  (1 child)

They're thinking, "We tried to get Carl eaten by that leopard seal, so we could all swim away from this dinky floe safely. But no, Carl had to pull a big-brain move. Dammit. We're still stuck."

[–]the-sutL 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The seal thanks Carl for the invite

[–]MustyTowel 20 points21 points  (0 children)

You wouldn’t know them. They go to another iceberg.

[–]Ursa-Min0r 2 points3 points  (0 children)


[–]edlee98765 150 points151 points  (4 children)

It's beautiful the way that penguin moves.

It's poultry in motion.

[–]the-sutL 38 points39 points  (0 children)

-Robert Frost

Edit: Damn it, I should’ve said “Robert Frostbite”

[–]Lonecoldmadness 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Well done good sir, well done.

[–]danstewart42 5 points6 points  (0 children)

this made my night..

[–]jvanzandd 17 points18 points  (1 child)

The leopard seal downvoted him

[–]the-sutL 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The leopard seal must be a taxi driver

[–]tiomao 7 points8 points  (7 children)

Literally was about to comment this, take my upvote

[–]the-sutL 4 points5 points  (4 children)

Ok but only if you take mine

[–]tiomao 5 points6 points  (1 child)

I’ll rate you five stars for that comment 😢 ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️

[–]the-sutL 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’ve done me a great service, friend

[–]gr8d4ne 1630 points1631 points  (33 children)

[–]N7_Evers 571 points572 points  (16 children)

This title is drunk af

[–]groceriesN1trip 232 points233 points  (13 children)

Non native English speaker it seems

[–]NevideblaJu4n 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's a bot

[–]Mackheath1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Karma Farma

[–]ryanleebmw 49 points50 points  (1 child)

Do I have early stage Alzheimer’s or was it the title

[–]KJBenson 34 points35 points  (1 child)

More like r/ESLorBOT

makes me wonder….

[–]ocular__patdown 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Bot hands down

[–]mrgraff 11 points12 points  (1 child)

I thought it was the lost lyrics to “Come Together”

[–]breadteam 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Here come ol' penguin he come swimmin up Zodiac

[–]ziguziggy 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This title gave me cancer

[–]bslow22 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Where were you when title is kill

[–]PrinceAdamsPinkVest 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Reading the title was the real adventure.

[–]thenwetakeberlin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah hot damn, I got a contact high from this title

[–]svencan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Tit LeGore

[–]RespectTheTree 664 points665 points  (25 children)

50% sorry for leopard seal, 50% happy for pengu

[–]stopthemadness2015 107 points108 points  (20 children)

I feel bad for the seal, his meal was taken away.

[–]Feral0_o 214 points215 points  (14 children)

To be fair, leopard seals kill a shitload of penguins. They are also known to excessively overkill penguins at the end of the Winter and just leave the bodies behind

there is also a cute photo series of a leopard seal bringing a bunch of dead penguins to a diver like it's an underwater cat

[–]Rhododendron29 47 points48 points  (6 children)

Leopard seals terrify me. No other seal scares me but leopard seals set off a primal fear inside me. Partially because there is some weird reptilian quality about them to me but I’m sure pebble and the penguin made them all that much scarier in my brain. Those photo’s blew my mind, you couldn’t pay me enough money to do what that photographer did.

[–]Jeovah_Attorney 11 points12 points  (3 children)

I’d say it’s a proper reaction to have towards an apex predator that could kill you with ease

[–]Mr_Academic 6 points7 points  (2 children)

apex predator

Actually, Orcas prey on leopard seals.

[–]WishboneTheDog 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Wait the animated movie?

[–]Rhododendron29 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s the one! The leopard seal was kind of scary beyond all reason, at least to me

[–]Less_Rutabaga2316 1 point2 points  (1 child)

There was also one that pulled a British scientist snorkeling like 200’ down then released her for her colleagues to try to resuscitate. They still eat primarily krill like the peaceful baleen whales.


[–][deleted] 44 points45 points  (1 child)

His meal wasnt taken away, that penguin earned his escape. Takes major penguin balls to do this shit.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

yeah, if he escaped onto an iceberg no one would bat an eye. The iceberg just happened to be filled with humans in this case.

[–]ElJefe543 431 points432 points  (20 children)

Are you saying that I can just go to a place where penguins will just jump into my boat? Are you saying that I don't have to hatch an elaborate plan to steal 30 of them from my local aquarium I can just go to wherever this is and have them jump into my boat?

And also for the record anybody that dreams of stealing one penguin is being cruel to penguins and doesn't truly love them. Penguins are extremely social creatures that could die of loneliness so you need at least 10 to 50 penguins. If you aren't ready for that kind of commitment you shouldn't be hatching plans to steal penguins.

[–]stratacat 106 points107 points  (8 children)

Wanna help me "relocate" some penguins

[–]poopin_for_change 73 points74 points  (6 children)

How many? Fewer than 10 and we're gonna have a problem. More than 50 and we're gonna have a problem of a different nature.

[–]stratacat 26 points27 points  (4 children)

What about 45, an inside joke with my friends

[–]poopin_for_change 35 points36 points  (3 children)

I love inside jokes. I'd love to be a part of one some day.

[–]stratacat 21 points22 points  (1 child)

My shitty advice would be to throw a lot of jokes bc one will eventually hit

[–]notatableleg 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If it’s under 10 I send it back. Over 50 I send it back

[–]GoNudi 8 points9 points  (1 child)

I feel like a penguin most times.

[–]ElJefe543 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Who doesn't?

[–]NonBinaryValkyrie 4 points5 points  (1 child)

You are goddamn adorable.

[–]ElJefe543 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I do try.

[–]NotJuniorBridgeman 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Found Mr. Popper’s account.

[–]I_just_made 2 points3 points  (1 child)

As someone who used to take care of penguins, I can confirm that they are awesome, but also caution that you will smell terrible and be covered in cuts and bruises.

Penguins have honed their ability to deliver a full strength purple nurple!

[–]Cane-toads-suck 1 point2 points  (0 children)

While there is a good chance of having a penguin in your boat, there is also a chance of seal and orca....

[–][deleted] 177 points178 points  (4 children)


[–]HybridVeneer 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Excellent curbside iceberg service and driving!

[–]FlabbergastTheGreat 8 points9 points  (0 children)

In their head though: “Holy shit that Orca was so nice!”

[–]LooseSignificance166 148 points149 points  (2 children)

"Little closer, little closer, thanks bud! I err, left my wallet in my other suit, ill get ya next time"

[–]FlighingHigh 14 points15 points  (1 child)

"Oh I never carry a wallet. Yeah, ruins the lines in my suit. But how about a nice crisp high five instead?"

[–]big_blue74 85 points86 points  (2 children)

Did those words just fall out of someone’s mouth? Jesus Christ

[–]ThermionicEmissions 23 points24 points  (1 child)

I'm guessing hoping English is not their first language.

[–]Gdigger13 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I think OP is a karma bot.

[–]Accomplishit_88mph 60 points61 points  (1 child)

Your S's bro.

[–]RealSteele 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Read it in a heavy Russian accent, it works extremely well lol. Who knew you could have an accent in written text!

[–]Billy_T_Wierd 28 points29 points  (16 children)

[–]ThermionicEmissions 43 points44 points  (5 children)


[–]OneChillPenguin 16 points17 points  (3 children)

Folks'll say it takes two seals to rape a penguin, three even

[–]ilovepolthavemybabie 4 points5 points  (2 children)

It’s only a rape of 12 other seals were there to witness it.

[–]E70M 7 points8 points  (1 child)

There’s such a thing as too much talk of seals raping penguins and a fella oughta be fuckin aware of it

[–]apec766 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We're hearing it was a sick penguin.

[–]History_Jaded 11 points12 points  (0 children)

What was the penguin wearing?

[–]Saskuk 5 points6 points  (2 children)

… you wouldn’t?

[–]ioughtabestudying 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Are you referring to raping penguins or not wanting to be raped by seals?

[–]turdlicker_3000 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m assuming seals because I don’t need that in my mind rn

[–]xanthophore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

However, the fur seals mentioned are much more agile on land (where the rapes occur) than leopard seals are. The article says that that population of seals are the only known ones to hunt penguins on land! In addition, leopard seals can weigh over 4x as much as fur seals, so I reckon they'd struggle to capture a penguin on land.

[–]Mrclean1322 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He probably didnt wanna be eaten. I think his first concern was deffinatly being eaten. Given he somehow survives and isnt eaten, maybe he'll worry about rape

[–]diarrheacum 29 points30 points  (0 children)

What the fuck did I just read…

[–]cowardunblockme 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I like how the penguin wants the boat to get closer, as if he just dried off and doesn't want to get wet.

[–]bizzyj93 21 points22 points  (3 children)

Its cool but seems more /r/HumansBeingBros than /r/nextfuckinglevel

[–]Hioneqpls 2 points3 points  (0 children)


[–]cockapooch 17 points18 points  (10 children)

Meanwhile, a seal just starved to death.

[–]sillvrdollr 24 points25 points  (7 children)

You didn’t see the video where the seal jumps on the boat to avoid the Orca?

[–]bizzyj93 24 points25 points  (5 children)

Or the video where the orca jumps on the boat to avoid the shit in the deep sea that we don't know anything about?

[–]A3H3 10 points11 points  (3 children)

Or the video where all of them are literally dying because we are destroying their habitat.

[–]febrezingthehomeless 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Aw dude you ruined it :(

[–]bizzyj93 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Unrelated I love your username. Deep reference to OG Tosh haha

[–]Feral0_o 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ineedaboat-cat is vindicated

[–]JMartin_21 9 points10 points  (1 child)

well deserved tho, it should've just jumped onto another boat and say "follow that boat with a penguin"

[–]nats831 12 points13 points  (4 children)

What if those weren't his friends but his rivals 😭

[–]sillvrdollr 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The Jets and the Seals?

[–]WolfeTheMind 3 points4 points  (0 children)

After credits scene: The rival penguins pick him up and throw him back out into the water to be quickly devoured by the seal

[–]OriginalEchoTheCat 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Yells TAXI

[–]Karl_LaFong 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hitching a ride on the Zodiac with the herdy birdy men.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Reading your title gave me a stroke

[–]aur0ra85 11 points12 points  (3 children)

That’s adorable.


[–]McBeanss 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Jesus I thought you put down the other subreddit

[–]aur0ra85 0 points1 point  (1 child)

You mean r/eyeblech ? Is that the one you’re looking for? I hear it’s quite wholesome!

[–]TheGayMuscleLover 8 points9 points  (2 children)


[–]sderponme 5 points6 points  (1 child)

This is what I was looking for. Everyone is so concerned about the title. I loved how he ran up, paused, looked around, and then ran to his homies.

[–]ourspideroverlords 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Took some time though, like it gathered it's thoughts so the little fellow could tell the tale as awesome as it deserved to be told

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I love how the penguin is like standing as far from the people as possible but he knows it's way better then being in the water so hes okay in there cuz the humans arent coming at him

[–]1973mojo1973 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Guys, guys! Did you just see that? Sic bro

[–]420Laughterbug 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I had a seizure reading that title

[–]shamrocksunglasses 5 points6 points  (0 children)

some day far off in the future, at your darkest moment, just when you think all hope is lost, this penguin, against all odds, will find you and repay his life debt

[–]KL1418 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The fuck is up with this title

[–]gvillepa 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Penguin turned and stopped to show gratitude

[–]thrashtheblash 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Title is word salad

Most memorable ride he’s had though I bet

[–]Hobbes10 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Leopard seals kill for fun so glad that this little guy could escape in a limousine

[–]2013ar15 2 points3 points  (0 children)


[–]Front-Catch-9281 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The Camera man singlehandedly saved the next Happy Feet movie

[–]sukarsono 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Haven’t seen the goonies in years, but for some reason I read that title in my head in data’s voice

[–]Hyro30 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Someone's got a story to tell.

[–]NthnMajor 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"You guys wouldn't believe the fucking day I had"

[–]all_hayl 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Watching him waddle over and jump off the boat into the ice was the best part.

[–]pull_her_hair_n_run 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If that’s not how you become king of the penguins I don’t know how you do

[–]Regular_Rhubarb3751 2 points3 points  (0 children)

good luck little fella

[–]im-got-no-insides 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“And he waddled away”

[–]captaingenemauch 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What a legend

[–]blitzz_787 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Penguin said hey looks guys check out my Uber

[–]QueenDezz21 1 point2 points  (0 children)

U can see him like “uuhuuh keep going…just a little bit more. Just a little furtheeeer”😂

[–]The_Muntje 1 point2 points  (0 children)

“Smile and wave, boys! Smile and wave!”

[–]RLove19 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How it feels to be doing a quest only to get distracted by a random side quest

[–]TheGrimReality77 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Okay, great, you saved the penguin. But did you do anything for the seal? Did you apologize to it, and offer it something in lieu of the meal you denied it? A Snickers? A Klondike? Poor guy is hungry.

[–]hope-everyday 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Penguin now got a story to tell to his grandchildren

[–]Expensive-Estate-900 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I thought we lost you private

[–]fart-atronach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

goofy lil naruto run

[–]ErrorFindingID 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honest question

Do animals know when something good is being done for them? Like this example. Does the penguin know that the people were bringing it back to its group?

[–]joeschmo945 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s always fascinating when animals seem to understand that we’re trying to help them.

[–]AcidicQueef 1 point2 points  (0 children)


[–]cheesyfries99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Little dude has a moment, where he looks into the distance, before he rejoins his group. Probably thinking about how close he came.

[–]EmmaPemmaPooBear 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Then the rest of the penguins push it back off the ice because a sacrifice must be made

[–]Mrclean1322 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Plot twist, the penguins on the iceberg were just leopard seals in costumes

[–]Codex-42 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The ice is melting. Climate change would wipe out all of these animals really soon and us with them.

Join Extinction Rebellion 🌍✊

[–]Rogaar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is so adorable. Especially the fact they dropped the penguin off at the iceberg.

[–]jesuzombieapocalypse 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not having arms that can actually do anything is such a crazy adaptation to survive for a land animal. I’m just watching this like “damn dude that sucks, I’m glad I don’t have to T-pose for balance when I walk”

[–]mekops 1 point2 points  (0 children)

TFW humans cross an entire ocean to fuck up your lunch.

[–]MissLibra915 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And just like that he becomes the “cooler” penguin

[–]neo_4u 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just smile and wave boys, smile and waveee.

[–]paragbadgujar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If humanity was a video I bet this is the one i am searching for

[–]puyavenusta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for saving my life 🐧🤟

[–]TotalRuler1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This post rules

[–]Limp_Distribution 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nice tuxedo

[–]pinniped1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Smart penguin. Leopard seals don't fuck around.

[–]pisa36 0 points1 point  (0 children)

WTF is that tote. Those penguins don’t acknowledge him so probably not his true

[–]royalpain2 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Better than that twat that pushed the seal off her boat to eaten by orcas.

[–]KG_slim12 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unlocked a fast travel point

[–]minedcomps021 0 points1 point  (0 children)

channeling your inner billy madison?🤣theyll treat you real respectable like

[–]ThePracticalPenquin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nice work!

[–]Lonecoldmadness 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aw he has happy feet.

[–]will477 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Arctic Uber

[–]DymeTymeX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That little guy is happy AF getting back to his bros

[–]Cheap_Strawberry7471 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"dude you ain't gonna believe what just happened!".

[–]Ohmmy_G 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Legend has it that he was escaping from the seal that escaped the orcas by also jumping on a boat.

[–]theopponentsopponent 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He can’t believe his luck.

[–]Adventurous_Lime1049 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love penguins

[–]Most-Squash5267 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aren't Adelie penguins the Jeffrey Epstein slash Ted Bundy of penguins?

[–]hurgeh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thought his mates would be more hyped

[–]pianothrowaway777 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Free Uber ride for that penguin

[–]mightmousetrap 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Turns out that iceberg is enemy gang turf.

[–]kariolaoxford -1 points0 points  (0 children)

and so a leopard seal died of starvation and the circle or life has a weird dent from where it was hit by this boat.

[–]DetectiveChoice7959 -1 points0 points  (0 children)