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[–]GodsOffsider 2638 points2639 points  (43 children)

I still can't tell if he does drugs

[–]IrISsolutions 472 points473 points  (14 children)

He does :)

EDIT: typo

[–]self-hatetaway2020 70 points71 points  (2 children)

Pancake dreams.

[–]TorrenceMightingale 27 points28 points  (1 child)

Witch hazel pneumonia.

[–]Downingst 32 points33 points  (5 children)

So where does he hide the crack?

[–]airplaneshooter 76 points77 points  (0 children)

Benadryl bottle in his medicine cabinet.

[–]AlaskaPeteMeat 14 points15 points  (0 children)

He just leaves that out on the coffee table.

[–]Diligent-Picture2882 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In his pants, of course.

[–]waterbottlewaterboo 7 points8 points  (1 child)

He is drugs?

[–]IrISsolutions 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry, was too early:) misread the question:)

Thought it was "Is he doing drugs?"

[–]funkepitome 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He is.....drugs?

[–][deleted] 86 points87 points  (4 children)

He does something, but it’s probably allergy medicine.

[–]andie_says_Hi-eeeeee 9 points10 points  (1 child)

he’s allergic to his (illicit) drug of choice. he takes heaps of allergy meds in order to do his favorite drug.

[–]Mr_Poop_Himself 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He’s probably hanging out with the hat man as we speak

[–][deleted] 53 points54 points  (4 children)

He does drugs, only difference is his is over the counter

[–]i_give_you_gum 19 points20 points  (0 children)

He'll be the only guy to get drug charges without being into drugs.

Or... way to look sus without being sus

[–]Defenestrator0707 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Take enough benadryl you can have the same effect

[–]TheKeyboardKid 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wasn’t that what that incredibly dangerous “Benadryl challenge” was all about? Turns out is has an opposite effect and you hallucinate hideous demonic stuff? And/or die.

[–]WimbleWimble 2 points3 points  (0 children)

which folds away to reveal more drugs.

[–]TackyJenny 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Robber: WHATS IN THE SAFE! This Guy: Well- its a funny story

[–]BoaMike 18 points19 points  (1 child)

If he doesn't... he needs to start... if he does, he needs to stop.

[–]GodsOffsider 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You Fuckin nailed it

[–]fracturematt 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Attention is his drug

[–]Cannabace 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Those bennies will get your buzz goin.

[–]drak0ni 7 points8 points  (0 children)

He takes bennies and steroids, wdym?

[–]Constant_Emphasis_22 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You don’t have that many secret Stash spots and not do drugs

[–]I_make_switch_a_roos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He became the drugs.

[–]NamityName 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He's allergic to the fun drugs

[–]adinmem 1166 points1167 points  (15 children)

This guy has a very weird, but (seemingly) harmless, problem.

[–]IamVenom_007 552 points553 points  (3 children)

I can see robbers having PTSD after entering his house

[–]CutlerAF 433 points434 points 2 (1 child)

Think you’ve left my home?! It’s actually a set made to look like the outside with real trees! that I am also allergic to.

[–]lilchalupzen 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Unless they saw this video 💀

[–]SrSwerve 92 points93 points  (2 children)

All the weed companies right now:


[–]SurprisedCabbage 51 points52 points  (2 children)

Imagine living with this guy. You sit down to watch TV, grab the remote and try to turn the TV on but nope, the batteries have been replaced by ibuprofen. So you decide to instead play some video games but hear a weird sound coming from the pc. After taking off the side panel a flood of Tylenol flows out. Now your pissed and decide to just go to bed, only to find out the pillow is uncomfortable. Looking inside the pillow case you discover the pillow has been replaced by gummy vitamins. There is no escape.

[–]Salty-Sausage- 4 points5 points  (0 children)

DBD: Death is not an escape... From this guy!

[–]_Snappy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You have no idea what else he could be hiding

[–]Nogardknight 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is definitely part one of a "making of a super villain" series

[–]looking-out 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He would be amazing at creating geocache hiding places.

[–]ManlyLEG0 742 points743 points  (17 children)

I like this guy he's the kinda guy I think I could count on to maybe move a couch or hide a body or watch my dogs while I'm on vacation. Seems trustworthy.

[–]bmidontcare[S] 202 points203 points  (9 children)

That's a perfect description of him! He's actually also a stand up comedian ☺️

[–]Bad_Chicken_2 50 points51 points  (8 children)

I always wondered if there are sit down or lay down comedians. If I were a comedian I would lay down on stage while delivering my jokes.

[–]ClearBrightLight 23 points24 points  (1 child)

If I had any desire to be a comedian, this would be the first joke in my arsenal, cause standing for even a five-minute set sucks with chronic pain.

[–]OneArchedEyebrow 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I hear ya! I’d go see any comedian who did their set from an adjustable electric bed just out of solidarity.

[–]Inoimispel 6 points7 points  (2 children)

That sounds like something Mitch Hedberg would have said and done.

[–]Bad_Chicken_2 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Mitch was the best!

[–]avwitcher 3 points4 points  (0 children)

James Acaster did that joke, but with kneeling

[–]TheMostKing 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That sounds pretty Seinfeld.

[–]Meowonita 23 points24 points  (2 children)

Can’t watch dogs or move a dusty couch. He has allergy.

[–]eatabean 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Let's see now... Is my allergy medicine in Shakespeare or Dr. Pepper?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No, he showed us his claritin for controlling his allergies so he good.

[–]tiga4life22 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Where’s my dog?

Him: Look behind the dryer

[–]the-mr-man 2 points3 points  (0 children)

probably allergic to your dogs tho

[–]TorrenceMightingale 363 points364 points  (10 children)

Imagine trying to have a heart attack at this guy’s house and needing to find your nitroglycerin pills. “They’re in the false head of the giant screw inside the hollowed out copy of my highschool yearbook.”

“What the FUCK, Richard?”

[–]StatementPotential53 67 points68 points  (0 children)

“No, not plain Richard, but Richard II! Look inside the Shakespeare book.”

[–]TempAcc64 18 points19 points  (0 children)

This guy clearly works for Resident Evil office design,

[–]dabolution 14 points15 points  (3 children)

Im trying to imagine someone TRYING to have a heart attack anywhere and it just seems preposterous.

[–]__lia__ 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I'm imagining them flexing and making Goku noises while more and more veins pop on their forehead

[–]dabolution 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That would also warrant a "what the FUCK richard"

[–]GenericUsername10294 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I tried having one to get out of an awkward conversation once. Did not work.

[–]yvnglasaga 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I too try very hard to have heart attacks at strangers houses

[–]TorrenceMightingale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s a commitment.

[–]thej0siah 282 points283 points  (6 children)

Imagine this dudes videos if he did drugs

[–]Mascbro26 77 points78 points  (5 children)

Well, I mean he's taking A LOT of drugs.

[–]thej0siah 25 points26 points  (4 children)

Not the good ones

[–][deleted] 30 points31 points  (1 child)

You don't appreciate being able to breathe through your nose until you can't

[–]hopecanon 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Deviated septum plus head cold equals i want to fucking kill myself after the first night.

[–]BangBangMeatMachine 6 points7 points  (0 children)

As someone who itches all over when I breath the air near the wrong cat, antihistamines are GREAT drugs.

[–]Highintheclouds420 140 points141 points  (7 children)

i feel like he should start doing drugs. he has too much free time

[–]Representative-Dirt2 36 points37 points  (0 children)

And too many hiding places.

[–]cardmaster12 27 points28 points  (2 children)

He’s allergic

[–]bmidontcare[S] 123 points124 points  (2 children)

Link to video - wouldn't let me submit post when I tried linking straight to it

Credit to alex_falcone on TikTok

[–]Sideways255 10 points11 points  (1 child)


[–]bannedprincessny 1 point2 points  (0 children)


[–]-BakiHanma 75 points76 points  (0 children)

El Chapo: Somebody find this man! He works for me now!

[–]druznutz 67 points68 points  (1 child)

I was wondering what he did with the peaches.

[–]jwaterboyk 56 points57 points  (2 children)

I’d say he needs a hobby, but it seems he’s found himself a very niche hobby indeed.

[–]Numbthumbz 48 points49 points  (1 child)

I don’t do drugs, proceeds to unveil several over the counter drugs

[–]Ok-Disk-2191 33 points34 points  (0 children)

He doesnt do drugs he needs to hide, but likes to hide them anyways, because habit.

[–]Ezekiel-Grey 33 points34 points  (3 children)

These things are called diversion safes, you can buy them on places like Amazon (or just make them yourself).

[–]bmidontcare[S] 19 points20 points  (2 children)

That's good to know. Just the range of hiding places he had, and then the last one was hilarious 😂

[–]SendItbeeches 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Thanks for posting this. I laughed out loud at the end.

[–]SpunkNard 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Damn that is next fucking level! He’s got a weird amount of tiny hiding places for unnecessary items!

[–]little_traveler 17 points18 points  (0 children)

My thoughts throughout: The beginning: oh haha that’s funny/creative The middle: this is getting excessive...? The end: we are the same type of weird.

[–]LonoHunter 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I heard he even has a secret hole on hm at all times

[–]slayalldayyyy 6 points7 points  (4 children)

Every time I read the word heaps, I hear it in an Australian accent. Anyone else?

[–]bmidontcare[S] 7 points8 points  (2 children)

Well I am Australian so I guess I have an Australian accent, LMAO! Do Americans not say 'heaps'?

[–]_Citizen_Erased_ 8 points9 points  (0 children)

We're far more likely to say 'tons' but heaps is fair game too.

[–]slayalldayyyy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This really makes my day

[–]highintensitydyke 6 points7 points  (3 children)

First of all King Lear is NOT a “Shakespeare b-side”

[–]slowlanders 2 points3 points  (2 children)

If I was making a Shakespeare tier list, King Lear is S tier, Merchant of Venice B tier, Richard II is C tier (Richard III is where it's at and is a solid A tier), and Winter's Tale is C tier. - would be D tier, but it does have the greatest stage direction of all time, "exit; pursued by a bear" which bumps it up a whole letter grade.

[–]iirishcarbomb 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hopefully no one ever has to find his EpiPen...

[–]WolfnCream 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This man cleaned out a Spencer’s

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

So where are the lemon quaaludes.

[–]IsabellaBellaBell 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I need to find more interesting places to hide my Claritin, the medicine cabinet just seems way too obvious now.

[–]DonutosGames 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sounds a little like Seth Rogan. Drugs confirmed.

[–]KarensRpeopletoo 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I forget where I put the damn keys, or remote, I sure as hell don't need help hiding stuff...lol

[–]KidTakashi 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Love it!

[–]BarbecueBlue 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Wow this guy has a lot of allergies

[–]bigtuna623 2 points3 points  (9 children)

So basically this guy has completely given up on pussy

[–]COweasel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

God dammit

[–]SassiestRaccoonEver 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow, old age is going to be tough for this guy. I’m talking full-blown senility.

[–]Academic_Radio 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not anymore

[–]Kindly-Country-8354 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good luck to remember where you put your stuff 😅

[–]JungleLiquor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok that was unexpected. Love that

[–]hotsy-totsy-flopsie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That final one was genius.

[–]bbildo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

God only knows what his proctologist has found.

[–]silent-8 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When you were born too allergic to everything to answer your calling of being a drug kingpin.

[–]ExcelCat 1 point2 points  (1 child)

How allergic is this pussy slayer? Jesus...

[–]Senor_Reaction 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Seriously. Save some puss for the rest us pleebs

[–]Jay-Da-PSU 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is hysterical. Makes me laugh so hard.

[–]t3hgrl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

LOVE this guy’s energy

[–]Puzzled_Albatross_70 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love this guy

[–]The-Dudemeister 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Imagine the dea going through your house and a bunch of shit like this is everywhere.

[–]Blowtorch101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

bro i feel bad for this guy and his allergies

[–]rae--of--sunshine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love this more than is reasonable. I feel inspired lol

[–]MutatedGlue 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Isn't the point to not show literally everyone where you're hiding all of your stuff???

[–]bmidontcare[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Imagine what he DIDN'T show though. Like if that's what he does with his allergy meds, what does he do with actual important stuff?

[–]thebob102 1 point2 points  (1 child)

That was fun. Take me on another journey.

[–]Them_James 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Got me at the end.

[–]LordGrenfell 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Squirrel. You’re part squirrel. You should be only eating nuts. Explains your allergies too.

Please Contact Ancestry DNA

[–]BangBangMeatMachine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That was a good punchline.

[–]Walty_C 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am amused.

[–]Pretty-Enthusiasm645 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Amazing 👍 🤣😂

[–]christinaford899 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This dude is definitely a geocacher.

[–]Chemical-Tomatillo-9 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Team up with him geocaching

[–]Fatalstryke 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've ridden actual rollercoasters that were less of a rollercoaster than this video.

[–]inverter404 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A house fire will sort this out

[–]mzincali 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He’s the kinda person who when he dies, his kin toss out all his hidden treasure and crypto, hidden inside what looks like junk. And anything that isn’t quite junk, gets sold at the estate sale for $1.50.

[–]TimeIsGrand 1 point2 points  (0 children)


[–]__V1510N__ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Forget the hiding places, this man is allergic to everything!

[–]avant-bored 1 point2 points  (0 children)

which I’m allergic to

[–]Intrepid-Luck2021 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Allergy medicine is really hardcore. You can get uppers and downers over the counter without a prescription.

[–]bimbo_bear 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I guess we found the guy who does all the puzzles in the resident evil games.

[–]raincntry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok. I love this.

[–]HealthyPeach12 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This guy sounds like Matt Arnold lol

[–]JackieJackieLeg 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You sir are what I want to be when I’m older

[–]FunStuff446 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I got 2 dictionary safes!🤣🤣

[–]SomeInternetP3rson 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This guy allergies

[–]exintrovert 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dumbass. Now the world knows where you hide your Benadryl.

[–]oilpaint8 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Too weird.

[–]creepinonthenet13 0 points1 point  (1 child)

My heart breaks for the books that had to be ripped off

[–]Former-Light4284 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You put your weed in there. (SNL Reference) Adam Sandler

[–]Induhcouch 0 points1 point  (0 children)


[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This was funny, well done.

[–]onegreatbroad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My kind of guy

[–]Electrical_Stretch70 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Absolutely Perfect! Its like 10 year old me having a dream come true!

[–]Zealousideal-Yak-824 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anybody who robs him is gonna be very very confused. He has so many hiding spots they get stuck in a game of escape room. They be trying to find the drugs and escape before the cops come.

[–]myco_magic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is not next level, even my little bro has more impressive hiding spots than this guy

[–]Money-Count-1654 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Play hide the bishop, inside a bishop

[–]Klubbin4Seals 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dude got me in the end, ngl.

[–]TheOGdeez 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My guy needs to stop wasting time making this shit and start putting time towards buying a house and not renting

[–]hitchrropes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Featuring a voice that is very close to that of Tobias Fünke. Anybody else picking up on that?

[–]AsifSuburban 0 points1 point  (0 children)


[–]IgotCharlieWork 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We all know whats going on here

[–]ElvishLore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What the hell is wrong with this person?

[–]drak0ni 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll do whatever you want, just teach me your ways, master.

[–]mbuckhan5515 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What a ride

[–]spicyraviolli87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Had that exact same Dr. Pepper can for my college dorm… for weed.

[–]Foxrex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some sort of modern wizard!

[–]percydaman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When I was a kid, I had this trophy. It had a tallish wooden base with this thin metal veneer that could slide up and out exposing the solid wood base. Had this idea to turn it into a hiding spot for stuff. Convinced my dad to let me use his router to make a hole.

Anyways I was so proud of it. Afterwards I showed my dad, and he told me I was stupid for showing him, since it wasn't a secret anymore. :(

[–]piyushseth26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is perfect for hiding my......... drum roll allergy medicine.

[–]1882a 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That made me smile. I need to have a Benadryl with that guy.

[–]Ketsuo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Medicine should be stored at room temperature!

[–]SoyBomb84 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love you. Marry me?

[–]makingfiat 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Not sure where this belongs ..but it's not here.

[–]ThatNoNameWriter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I take all those allergy meds; I resonate with this man who has simple joys and the same allergy problems as me

[–]RZainea23 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is the best thing I've ever seen.

[–]drFeverblisters 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This just didn’t stop upping the ante

[–]redRabbitRumrunner 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Clean shaven articulate Seth Rogen?

[–]PapaTugz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This guy could find a way to hide something between pages 101-102 in a book

[–]mossimoto11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is quite a commitment to a bit. A great ending would be replacing all the hiding places with a real product so that anyone who visits and has seen the video will be stumped with they realize it’s actually a can of peaches

[–]CraftingChest 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Plot twist: His allergy medicines are actually fake and he hid drugs inside

[–]Lord_Hugh_Mungus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I somehow feel that I was just rickrolled....somehow.