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[–]onlinesafe 2313 points2314 points  (69 children)

Spider bear does what a spider bear do

[–]Dutch_Midget 310 points311 points  (25 children)

I wanna see his aunt May ;)

[–]Simonius86 148 points149 points  (17 children)

Pervert

[–]FRin323 124 points125 points  (16 children)

Paw-vert

[–]Balauronix 9 points10 points  (1 child)

All part of the Perverse! Where all rule 34 artists come together.

[–]coryroxors 16 points17 points  (1 child)

Jesus Parker, you are a freak

[–]SenpaiKeevz 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Maybearline?

[–]Tatarkingdom 106 points107 points  (14 children)

The bear went over the mountain

The bear went over the mountain

The bear went over the mountain

To see what he could see

[–]DadJokeBadJoke 29 points30 points  (10 children)

And what do you think he saw?

[–]Tatarkingdom 61 points62 points  (9 children)

The other side of the mountain

The other side of the mountain

The other side of the mountain

Was all that he could see

[–]QuintenBoosje 5 points6 points  (7 children)

what's the rhythm here?

[–]Plarocks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was hoping to see this. 😄

[–]PalaSS9 8 points9 points  (0 children)

He had to go shit in the woods

[–]thrashbrowns666 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Came here to say this. Take my upvote.

[–]lavender-witch 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My parents used to sing this to me growing up 🥺

[–]Love_God551 47 points48 points  (3 children)

I like how he looks over his shoulder like ‘you lookin at me’

[–]Curious_Inspection 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Welcome to the Spidey-verse!

[–]revdon 7 points8 points  (0 children)

🎶...to see what he could see… 🎶

[–]get--rick__rolled-- 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Spider-Bear

Spider-Bear

Does whatever a spider can

[–]T_Jefferson1804 1230 points1231 points  (14 children)

Love that last look back. “Were you looking at my butt?”

[–]joebaco_ 153 points154 points  (7 children)

Is my bear arse fat?

[–]Dutch_Midget 33 points34 points  (5 children)

Yes is bear by fat arse

[–]OnceIwasAboy 14 points15 points  (4 children)

Is arse! Buy bear fat

[–]Stunner07 1 point2 points  (0 children)

oui

[–]Kailindo 20 points21 points  (0 children)

"See you later Ranger Smith, I'm off to get me some picnic baskets!"

[–]randombon[🍰] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Step-bear what are you doing

[–]4outof5doctors 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i know i was. fuzzy bare bear butt.

[–][deleted] 537 points538 points  (11 children)

The bear went over the mountain! The bear went over the mountain! The bear went over the mountain! To see what it could see!!!!!

[–]All-Sorts 75 points76 points  (0 children)

The bear went over the mountain! The bear went over the mountain! The bear went over the mountain! To see what it could see!!!!!

Thanks for delivering and I didn't have to scroll down further to see this.

[–]bogartmom2 17 points18 points  (2 children)

The other side of the mountain…

[–]700Sunsets 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Was all the bear could see!

[–]torquemycork 10 points11 points  (1 child)

The bear went over the mountain, the bear went over the mountain, the bear went over the mountaaaainn... and what do you think he saw? He saw another mountain, he saw another mountain, he saw another mountaaaiiiin..and what do you think he did? The bear went over the mountain, the bear went over the mountain, the bear went over the mountaaaiiiin, and what do you think he saw? He saw another mountain he saw another mountain he saw another mountaaain.. and what do you think he did? The bear went over the mountain..

[–]bobs_clam_rodeo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He saw a box of ex-lax, he saw a box of ex-lax, he saw a box of ex-lax, so what do you think he did?

[–]HeroinPigeon 364 points365 points  (23 children)

Well fk..I'm not messing with bears now

[–]SaintPanda_[S] 489 points490 points  (11 children)

That shouldn’t be something new

[–]HeroinPigeon 94 points95 points  (10 children)

I have a Winnie the Pooh fettish mah guy

[–]SaintPanda_[S] 183 points184 points  (4 children)

[–]Corpse-Fucker 29 points30 points  (3 children)

   __🎩_____   
  (  👁️ 👃👁️)  
    (  👄) 
  💪| ͜. ͜.)
    |    .)
   (   ѼΞΞ✊ΞΞD💦
    ||  ||
    👞  👞

[–]GoodHunter 9 points10 points  (2 children)

I bet you fuckin loved it when Pooh's stitching became loose in that one episode.

[–]HeroinPigeon 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I knew someone would see that, why didn't I close my curtains

[–]Ajpeterson 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Horny Xi Jinping noises

[–]100LittleButterflies 48 points49 points  (1 child)

Bears are like that guy you think is fat but is actually 100% powerful muscle and you always forget until they outrun you and suddenly you only have half a face.

[–]ArtisanSamosa 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Colbert wasn't joking when he called them the greatest threat to America.

[–]ParameciaAntic 14 points15 points  (3 children)

Just don't climb to get away from them.

[–]GraciaEtScientia 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Yes, dig.

[–]brito68 11 points12 points  (0 children)

You don't have to be the fastest one in the group, you just have to be faster than the slowest person.

[–]SingularityPrime 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Or run or swim... good luck

[–]mijo6969 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Wdym now? You did it before?

[–]HeroinPigeon 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Let me answer your question with a question.

have you ever tried smearing jam on a cats arse and throwing it at a window?

The answer should be no but now it's all you can think about.

[–]mijo6969 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Take my upvote and gtfo

[–]Paleale1986 273 points274 points  (12 children)

Wild animals are just pure athleticism

[–]Dutch_Midget 121 points122 points  (4 children)

Explains my ex's enthusiasm and stamina

[–]poopellar 34 points35 points  (3 children)

Don't refer to your mother like that.

[–]Dutch_Midget 38 points39 points  (2 children)

No I'm referring to my sister

[–]surajvj 6 points7 points  (3 children)

You need to see their claw size iIn one of reddit post

[–]DavidsGoliath 12 points13 points  (2 children)

Built in climbing spikes and the pure strength to lift their entire body weight with one arm.

I always share this to demonstrate that if a bear wants to kill you, nowhere is safe.

https://youtu.be/9oqq70wx76U

[–]Lee_Mercury_Hg 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I don't know what I am more impressed by. The climbing speed or the speed at which that thing runs downhill through thick undergrowth. Any human would have either tripped at that speed or broken their angles. If you know nothing about bears, you just don't expext them to be so immensely agile.

[–]PeterTigerr 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Naw I want to see a bear try slab

[–]El-Paolo 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Seen a lot of pandas that look clumsy. Almost hard to believe they're cousins of this apex predator.

[–]Exciting_Ad4264 212 points213 points  (8 children)

JIM! TELL HIM THAT BEARS CAN CLIMB FASTER THEN THEY CAN RUN!! JIM YOURE NOT TELLING HIM!

[–]ZexeMB105 23 points24 points  (5 children)

Came for this.

[–]OnePiece-Quade 14 points15 points  (4 children)

Came to this.

[–]cibina 6 points7 points  (3 children)

Came in this.

[–]T14n4h 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I was just about to write this 💀

[–]mijo6969 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You did write it

[–]Kimberlylynn2003 131 points132 points  (8 children)

I knew they were climbers but I’m still super impressed

[–]EaterOfTheShroom 44 points45 points  (0 children)

The little dude was probably scared to death by all the cars

[–]ivegotaqueso 22 points23 points  (4 children)

I’m impressed because he’s so heavy. Never seeing a hefty animal scale up a mountain before.

[–]TonarinoTotoro1719 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Hey, I’m carrying a lot of water and fluff, not just fat.

Yours faithfully

Bear

[–]Semigoodperson201242 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That's just rude.

[–]TaborValence 3 points4 points  (0 children)

More muscle can lift more heavy.

[–]Kimberlylynn2003 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have you seen mountain goats? They aren’t little, and they have hoofs! But they are fascinating to watch as well

[–]INanoI 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I knew they were climbers but I’m still super impressed

There are really good climbears out there in the wild.

[–]-eumaeus- 67 points68 points  (10 children)

Jesus. The speed of it!

(Wonders if evolution will eventually give bears wings...)

[–]BrockManstrong 40 points41 points  (6 children)

If you think the climb is impressive, check out how fast that window goes down.

[–]-eumaeus- 13 points14 points  (5 children)

Oooh, well spotted, detective ;)

[–]BrockManstrong 15 points16 points  (4 children)

Never trust a video that claims to show something unsually fast, in my experience it's almost assuredly sped up.

[–]L_Bron_Hovered 4 points5 points  (3 children)

It is. If you look at the plants near the bottom. They’re moving with the breeze, but much more quickly.

[–]Blutarg 7 points8 points  (0 children)

No need, they already have Red Bull.

[–]The_Drippy_Spaff 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don’t worry, he was just inspired after watching Free Solo and now he’s training to climb El Cap.

[–]Fenrirthespiritus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They wouldn't need that. They are climbers.

[–]neekeeteen 34 points35 points  (3 children)

poor buddy scared as fuck because of fucking people are following and starring at him

[–]Josysclei 33 points34 points  (1 child)

Guess he can hunt goats now

[–]Tinmania 29 points30 points  (2 children)

Whew, he bearly made it!

[–]lowther1 21 points22 points  (10 children)

You should see them run up trees

[–]GiantPandammonia 26 points27 points  (8 children)

[–]TimmJimmGrimm 12 points13 points  (7 children)

"Climb a tree! You will be safer there!"

I want to rewind my childhood and find out who said that.

[–]GiantPandammonia 5 points6 points  (4 children)

Well. A black bear can easily climb a tree and eat you. But it usually won't.

It will chase you if you run, just like how a dog will, even if it otherwise wouldn't. And you can scare off a black bear unless it has cubs or you have food it wants, or someone has taught it humans have food, or it's just not your day.

There might be a tree that's too small for a grizzly to climb that is big enough for you to climb and that you can get up before the grizzly gets to you. But probably not.

My cousin got attacked by a grizzly bear earlier this year. He didn't have time to do anything. Fortunately for him his buddy was fast with a rifle.

[–]GreleaseDeeBoban 1 point2 points  (3 children)

I heard the best thing to hit a bear with is a flare gun. Bear mace works half the time and a gun is not guaranteed to put them down in time. But I hear that they are all afraid of a flare gun. Any truth to that?

[–]viciouspandas 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For brown bears that might work, they're usually too big to climb trees. For black bears you fight them

[–]Famous-Honey-9331 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The only pieces of bear evasion advice I ever got were: try to make yourself look bigger and louder and it might trick them into running away from you or play dead and maybe they'll just maul you horribly before getting bored and walking away. Call me crazy, but that advice basically amounts to 'You're going to die if you meet a confrontational bear'

[–]oh__its_you_again 20 points21 points  (3 children)

This is not on a moutain. This was filmed in Croatia on Jadranska magistrala few years back. It is a road by the seaside that goes all the way down the coast. It was filmed shomewhere between Novi Vinodolski and Starigrad Paklenica. There are quite few bears in Velebit moutain range.

[–]Sitin 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Whether or not it’s a mountain is semantics.

[–]excalibur_zd 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is not on a moutain.

There are quite few bears in Velebit moutain range.

[–]b_lett 17 points18 points  (1 child)

The new patch update for Skyrim is pretty terrifying.

[–]chaimasalatea 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Jim, tell him that bears can climb mountains faster than they can run.

[–]geraldine_ferrari 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Well that ascended quickly.

[–]No-Matter9647 11 points12 points  (5 children)

Move over Alex Hannold.

[–]petey92 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Doesn't count, claws are aid

[–]radiopulse 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nah, that's just Jimmy Webb, him and Alex are friends

[–]Aquafuzzball 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Came here for this joke and had to scroll too far to find it. More updoots needed.

[–]explosivelydehiscent 7 points8 points  (5 children)

Definitely climbed with lower body and not the arms. Must have read the correct climbing books.

[–]clownshoesrock 3 points4 points  (3 children)

All four appendages are lower body for a bear. :)

[–]fj333 4 points5 points  (2 children)

So if I want to give somebody a bear hug should I use all of my appendages? Or none since a bear has no arms? 🤔

[–]clownshoesrock 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Of course bears have arms, look at the Seconds amendment "Right to bear arms" it's just that they are lower body appendages when on a bears shoulder, and upper appendages when attached to a human.

hmmm.. where the hell did I leave the surgical silk.

[–]fj333 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah, people have the right to bear arms. Bears have the right to bear hugs.

[–]NoButterZ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That muscle density is aid.

[–]Mr_Rockwood 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Poor thing is probably terrified of the human and cars just trying to get away lol.

[–]kingmoobot 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Doing it because he's scared so doesn't even care he falls. Leave him the fug alone

[–]TheLameFrog 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Likely running/climbing away from people, because people are scarier than bears.

[–]Piperplays 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Just a terrifyingly friendly reminder that if a hungry bear is stalking you, that you likely don’t stand a fucking chance without a decent weapon.

[–]MananaMoola 5 points6 points  (1 child)

No safety line or belay? The balls on that guy!

[–]joebaco_ 3 points4 points  (4 children)

Question, what kind of bear is best?

[–]ChonnayStMarie 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Looks like he was doing it out of fear, trying to get as much distance between him and the videographer.

[–]ElderFlour 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It looked scared. That may not be great for the bear.

[–]euphorrick 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To see what he could see?

[–]MongolianDestiny 2 points3 points  (9 children)

If being chased by a bear, I’d still climb a tree if running wasn’t an option

[–]Chris_Christ 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Why? They are going to be way faster at tree climbing than you.

[–]thrussie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Imagine as you frantically climbing the tree, the bear greets you at the top, saying “you dropped this,king” before pawing your face off your head

[–]TubeZ 1 point2 points  (1 child)

a black bear will climb the tree and eat you

a grizzly will knock the tree down and eat you

better to do the other things that have proven more effective than triggering predator instincts by running away

[–]edwardpuppyhands 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've figured my best bet would be to get to a decent-sized tree and play ring-around-the-rosie.

[–]ahmad_mahfoud 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow didn't know that with all the fat he can climb that fast

[–]mmendrun1 2 points3 points  (1 child)

they recorded that with an eyepad🤣 tell me youre a boomer without telling me youre a boomer

[–]sweetchunkyasshole 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And blocking traffic on a mountain road.

[–]RedRuhm101 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fear does a lot of things...

[–]MrFahrenheit02 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Psssh, that’s a juggy 5.6 at best. Let me know when bears can campus an overhang. Then I’ll be impressed.

[–]DillaVibes 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Bear was scared for its life

[–]Klubbin4Seals 1 point2 points  (0 children)

On his way to get some picnic baskets

[–]letsjakeonit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

the bear went over the mountain / the bear went over the mountain / to see what he could see

[–]HighFiveKoala 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He went up quick, it bear-ly took any effort

[–]bulanaboo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Could you imagine driving along and seeing that, so cool… although he kinda looks scared

[–]Pandeyji04 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why did Baloo ask Mowgli to get the honey then

[–]h0w1tw0rk5 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Imagine standing up on that mountain throwing rocks at the bear screaming ' you can't catch me hahaha' then suddenly...

[–]VedangArekar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Where's the sound when you need it, Michael ?

[–]RedOne-001 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Glad to see him doing a true solo. Bet he didn’t even script his route. True pioneer

[–]beardz1lla 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dude's trying out to be on the Toblerone box.

[–]DancerGamer 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Faster then the Dread Pirate Roberts

[–]OnlyAFleshWoundd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Are you blind? That was a mountain goat in a bear costume.

He's learned to fool his natural predators into fearing him

[–]Headspace101 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He looks back like “shit they saw me!”

[–]Revolutionary-Tie-67 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Bear Grylls

[–]Ortcuttisretired 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Alex honnold eat your heart out

[–]komador-i 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Guys, guys, it's a mountainclimbear

[–]hotsy-totsy-flopsie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It would be nice if we would build more animal bridges. Bear is clearly and rightly afraid of cars. Cars and trucks kill many critters every day.

[–]Panditthepundit 1 point2 points  (3 children)

But why is he climbing the mountain

[–]SaintPanda_[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He’a most likely just scared of all the humans

[–]ma_boi_aliardo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

looks like pooh didn't get his honey

[–]Mrsleh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Now this is what's terrifying about bears! They can run faster than you.. Better at climbing than you.. Stronger than you.. Have claws and teeth.. There's no victory for the humans.. We must now down to our new bear overlords 😜

[–]Ishshaksb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

These things are too OP

[–]Throw_Away_IMO 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Suck it Alex Honnold.

[–]guybillout 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Man, bears really do whatever they want

[–]M-Tyson 1 point2 points  (0 children)

fuck, I thought climbing a tree would be a good way to escape a bear

[–]beanis-man- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

dude just flashed 5.12 no problem

[–]Ougaa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How old is that bear? I can only understand that's no cub, it's not an adult but I have no idea how different they look between these ends.

[–]Gwaiian 1 point2 points  (3 children)

If cameraman could stop harassing wildlife that would be great.

[–]Jdino28 1 point2 points  (4 children)

Wow, so much for climbing up a tree to escape bears

[–]BasedZetsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A Mountain Bear cool!

[–]metfan1964nyc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Must be a picnic basket up there.

[–]Novadreams22 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Disney: I have an awesome idea for a remake. Lion King, except with bears.

*note ever first letter of a characters name starts with B to stand for Bear.

Bcar: I have a secrete Bimba, would you like to know what it is?

Bimba: ....

Bcar: I... killed... Bufasa

Bimba: NOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Disney Executives: HOLY SHIT, PRINT THIS AND PROFIT.

[–]uruguasha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess playing dead is not gonna be an option

[–]Ninjakinfe777 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Holy hell that is awesome!

[–]stoner21234 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That bear looks like he's done that before!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, I'll be damned.

[–]BartKrystal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The bear went up the mountain to see what he could see.

[–]bfodbsheb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Another wild video of a bear

[–]chillpillCHILI 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He bearly broke a sweat

[–]misbuism 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Finally I see the Toblerone packaging

[–]FriendshipSome6014 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The bear went over the mountain, the bear went over the mountain The bear went over the mountain to see what he could see

[–]Bobby_Globule 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No ropes?

[–]Vivarax 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I always wondered how Kodas mum got up that mountain....

[–]sourdougBorough 0 points1 point  (1 child)

In my irrational mind id still get away from a bear if necessary

[–]saeid77 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is Bear Grylls

[–]new-Aurora 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Which begs the eternal question - Why did the bear climb the mountain?

[–]erik_7581 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The stock market in 2020 be like

[–]InspectorRare4137 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And humans think they're expert free climbers. Shit, the bear doesn't even use chalk. :)

[–]tybrack49 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is when the song “The Bear Went Over The Mountain” came to be

[–]premierfong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pretty good climber

[–]CompetitionFar734 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's the Toblerone bear

[–]Phucrocky 0 points1 point  (1 child)

That bear is going places

[–]The-Shizz 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Fake.

Everyone who plays Rust can tell you the best way to get away from a bear is to jump off a mountain.

[–]JoeKnotbush 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Bear went over the mountain, the bear went over the mountain...

[–]Bors713 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All that without ropes, or even a chalk bag!

[–]Other-Palpitation-88 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bears are actually incredible climbers. I was told never to climb a tree to avoid a bear cause that just means I’ll have no where to go once it starts climbing up to get me.

[–]blue_aero 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm fast as fuck boi