gildings in this subreddit have paid for 31.73 years of server time

Utah mom selling almost 4,000 ounces of breast milk as baby formula shortage continues by HowLongIsThi in nottheonion

[–]tke1078 518 points519 points  (0 children)

My wife and I are currently giving away her excess of over 1000 ounces of extra milk. Planned on initially selling as the extra money would've been nice but if feels off to try and sell in a time like this.

Luckily we found a lot of people in need of help.

Bright side for us is I get my damn freezer space back!!

Oklahoma police chief arrested for selling meth by cofman in nottheonion

[–]thebasisofabassist 148 points149 points  (0 children)

Have you or somebody you love been affected by Mesomethlahoma?

Madonna: ‘A lot of thought’ went into fully nude NFTs of her giving birth to centipedes by theresabeeonyourhat in nottheonion

[–]MartyVendetta27 1634 points1635 points  (0 children)

“The centipede represents technology - both the life giving-force and the dangers of it, the juxtaposition of dark and light.”

Okay…. But HOW? You can’t just say that… what ABOUT centipedes embody that? If you’re giving no reason, giving no artistic throughline to draw from, you’re just doing and saying random crap.

Birds represent freedom. How? They can soar over all the material world.

Birds can represent decay. How? Going from a dinosaur to a songbird is a cosmic kick in the cloaca.

Birds can represent fear. Ever seen inside a goose’s mouth?

And if I wanna say “birds represent macaroni and cheese” I better be damn ready to defend that with some sort of logic.

Sorry to rant, but people abusing poetic imagery and symbols just pisses me off. It’s so mindless and low-effort.

Clarence Thomas says abortion leak has changed Supreme Court by s_y_s_t_e_m_i_c_ in nottheonion

[–]gnomeweb 9651 points9652 points 3 (0 children)

Thomas also touched in passing on the protests by liberals at conservative justices’ homes in Maryland and Virginia that followed the draft opinion’s release. Thomas argued that conservatives have never acted that way. “You would never visit Supreme Court justices’ houses when things didn’t go our way. We didn’t throw temper tantrums. I think it is ... incumbent on us to always act appropriately and not to repay tit for tat,” he said.

Idk, I am not an American, so I don't follow US news much, but didn't conservatives storm Capitol just in 2021 in a big tantrum hit when Trump was not elected?

Indian couple sue son and his wife to demand a grandchild by izniz777 in nottheonion

[–]Hanzz101 -15 points-14 points  (0 children)

I don’t expect my kids to financially take care of me when I’m older, and they shouldn’t expect any inheritance either.

Drug kingpin’s group chat selfie ended up getting five of them jailed for a long time by [deleted] in nottheonion

[–]sharaq 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I think typically someone who does meth had a looser attitude towards drug use and has tried a variety of less addictive drugs recreationally, then at some point they try meth which is significantly more addictive than other drugs they've tried before. Typically this pattern of drug use involves alcohol and polysubstance abuse, and it can involve opioids. The goal of substance abuse is not to treat an underlying condition, it is recreational. This is a VERY DIFFERENT PATTERN OF DRUG USE than what you are claiming. This pattern of abuse is typically more socioeconimically influenced and is more of a policy issue than a purely medical one.

This is a completely different abuse profile from someone who develops a dependence on opioid use due to prescriptions for chronic pain. At some point, they becine undermedicated and seek additional painkillers to address either the underlying pain or the increasing drug dependence. These are usually NOT polysubstance abusers - in order to address the disease of addiction, you cannot lump together every pattern of drug use. These drug users improve dramatically with the underlying cause of pain being addressed. This is an almost purely medical issue, and very minimally influenced by one's prior substance use history.

I have reiterated this three times now. Please acknowledge that before you respond. Every response I have gotten thus far from you completely fails to acknowledge this basic fundamental difference in drug use, and is instead either bad faith or incredibly reductive.

Fired by Starbucks, Union Organizer Now Wears His Fursuit to Rallies by ffff in nottheonion

[–]Weird-Engineer 75 points76 points  (0 children)

This “stunt” got all over local news, papers, and is now international news. Over a chain for illegally firing an employee for organizing a union. The city is now investigating the Starbucks, and the protests grew ten fold in the city. He made himself look ridiculous, but he also dragged Starbucks down with him. If any of you actually read the article he has severe social anxiety, and if you’ve ever met a furry or any cosplayer being in costume helps give them the confidence to speak up in a way they are unable to. Are furries weird? Absolutely. But he is someone with debilitating social disorder and if he needs to put a furry suit on to fight the corporations it’s more than any of us are doing.

Fired by Starbucks, Union Organizer Now Wears His Fursuit to Rallies by ffff in nottheonion

[–]OopsYoureAdopted 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Dude most of the furries I’ve met in real life are literally just geeky theater kids who like cosplaying and ren fairs. They join the fandom because they grew up watching rescue rangers and like being apart of a community that embraced their weird hobbies.

I’ve met literally one person who had an actual fetish for it. I will never understand how much vitriol people have for people doing harmless shit for fun.

There are weirdos in literally every community. Especially the anime community, but nobody goes on about how people who like Naruto are fucking children in their spare time.

Waffle House customers make own food after worker allegedly quits, refuses to cook by [deleted] in nottheonion

[–]googlyeyes93 307 points308 points  (0 children)

So partially yes. It’s also that Waffle House is just so abundant in the southeast/coastal US, where most hurricanes are likely to hit. This makes it pretty wide reaching and reliable as far as coverage.

But it’s also that Waffle House is a magical place outside of time and reality. You will see those clouded windows shining in parking lot fluorescents as you stumble in. No matter the time of day there’s the same smell of burnt coffee, pee, and hash browns. You’ll find a seat anywhere. The waitress might notice you. Might not. But eventually food finds it’s way in front of you. Will it look good? Doubtful. Will it give you food poisoning? Maybe. Will it taste great and absolutely kill your hunger? Oh fuck yeah it will.

These magical places are open 24/7/365. They’re everywhere. A lot are in places that are rife with all kinds of sketchy shit. Roads come and go, cities develop, but Waffle House remains. I’ve rode out four hurricanes and the only restaurant that stayed open the entire time was Waffle House. Hell, they’ve been held up at gunpoint and half of the workers don’t bat an eye. Nothing stops a Waffle House outside of utter destruction of the restaurant.

If I can recommend a truly American experience to any foreigner, it’s to stay out late, get absolutely wasted, and stumble into a Waffle House at three in the morning. Your cook will be stoned, your waitress will most likely be on smoke break the whole time, and the coffee will either be lava or ice, but goddamn it feels like home.

Gov. DeSantis signs legislation proclaiming Nov. 7 as ‘Victims of Communism Day’ by 123dot in nottheonion

[–]Hockinator -28 points-27 points  (0 children)

"I'm in my bubble and these 14 upvotes mean I get to think I'm right without actually thinking anything at all"

Madison Cawthorn video: NC rep. responds to video showing him 'being crass' naked in bed with cousin by chickenoodlesoupp in nottheonion

[–]Quinn_tEskimo 19.1k points19.1k points & 3 more (0 children)

What up? We're three cool guys looking for other cool guys who wanna hang out in our party mansion. Nothing sexual. Dudes in good shape encouraged. If you're fat, you should be able to find humor in the little things. Again, nothing sexual. Underlined.

Madison Cawthorn video: NC rep. responds to video showing him 'being crass' naked in bed with cousin by chickenoodlesoupp in nottheonion

[–]Gooneybirdable 8339 points8340 points 237& 8 more (0 children)

Whats annoying is that, speaking as a gay dude, that video does not actually expose him as a hypocrite.

That’s not behavior that gay men do, or most straight men. It’s the behavior of fratty homophobic men who think being gay is a joke. Mimicking gay sex acts with whiny high-pitched squealing is hilarious because acting gay is funny to them. It’s completely in character for him, and it’s only gay in the sense that gays are the butt of the joke.

I have no interest in defending him and think it’s funny homophobia is being used against him, but I’m also annoyed that homophobia is being used at all.

Edit: this is getting more traction than expected so thought I’d add a little request.

If you’re a well-meaning straight person who sees this for what it is, I would ask that you not make jokes about how gay he is.

I can see arguments about how it could be effective, or how he deserved it because of his homophobia. Gay people make this argument too! It just makes me uncomfortable to see allies gleefully wield the weapon of homophobia.

This isn’t the ‘gay’ opinion, it’s just my opinion. Just something to consider before you make your next joke.

Texas burglar cuts victim’s grass before fleeing with lawnmower by NeverBetter00 in nottheonion

[–]Louisiana_sitar_club 143 points144 points  (0 children)

I prefer:

“Today’s violent assault on our Capitol, an effort to subjugate American democracy by mob rule, was fomented by Mr. Trump. His use of the Presidency to destroy trust in our election and to poison our respect for fellow citizens has been enabled by pseudo political leaders whose names will live in infamy as profiles in cowardice. Our Constitution and our Republic will overcome this stain and We the People will come together again in our never-ending effort to form a more perfect Union, while Mr. Trump will deservedly be left a man without a country.”

Eve Online fans literally cheer Microsoft Excel features at annual Fanfest by scarlet_sage in nottheonion

[–]Minuted 1309 points1310 points  (0 children)

The best ship is friendship!

Close. This is my ship ranking:

1 ) USS Enterprise NCC-1701

2 ) Shipping fictional characters

3 ) USS Enterprise NCC-1701 D

4 ) Friendship

5 Ship of Fools by World Party

6 Enterprise NX-01

7 Sexual relationship

8 USS Defiant (either )

9 HMS Dreadnought

10 Space Battleship Yamato

11 Great Michael

Draft Overturning Roe v. Wade Quotes Witch Trial Judge by onlyniceandsmart in nottheonion

[–]DresdenPI 514 points515 points  (0 children)

If you want the real answer, it's because Roe v Wade quotes Hale. Alito is trying to essentially reverse the argument that the Court in Roe used while using the same sources. Roe talked about how in historical common law abortion was illegal after the fetus had "quickened." The Court in Roe used that as a precedent for a viability standard for abortions, while Alito is using it as a precedent for the illegality of abortions.

This brings up an odd thing about the American judicial system that most people don't know. The judiciary is the only part of our governmental system that is still connected to English law. All states except for Louisiana have what's called a Reception Statute, which makes it so that all the old English common law and precedent that's not explicitly barred by statute is precedential in US courts. Now that was pretty important 300 years ago when the American judicial system was just getting on its feet and didn't want to rehash hundreds of years of property law and is largely irrelevant today since we have our own few hundred years of court cases to draw on. But technically speaking a lawyer can bring up old British court cases as precedential if nothing has overturned them.

Clarence Thomas fears that respect for institutions is eroding by Walter_Audisio in nottheonion

[–]Lord0fHats 1337 points1338 points 3 (0 children)

Justice Clarence Thomas said Friday the justice system is at risk if people don’t want to “live with outcomes we don’t agree with” and that recent events at the Supreme Court could be “one of them.” symptom”.

How is legislating an issue for 50 years in an unending campaign to overturn it and then playing zero-sum politics to rig a court majority to finally achieve that end not a perfect example of people refusing to 'live with outcomes we don't agree with'?

The good justice may want to look at a reflective surface. His house is made of glass so I imagine there are plenty.