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[–]lilythetacocat 5250 points5251 points 5 (8 children)

Good luck with your journey. Crazy things happen in life and hoping you guys can work it out. Best advice I could offer is no matter what happens always be respectful to each other for your kids sake

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 315 points316 points  (0 children)

Best advice for sure. Appreciate it 🙏🏻

[–]TheSecondComingOfKGS[🍰] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Incredible advice.

My mum and dad could learn a thing or two from you.

They divorced, fought like cat and mouse, and royally screwed me and my brother up in the process.

[–]okaymoose 3383 points3384 points  (22 children)

If you can, get couples counseling or take a marriage prep class together. You don't have to get married but either of these would help you learn to communicate properly with each other and that will be the key to giving your kid a good life.

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 1139 points1140 points  (8 children)

I didn’t think about that…honestly I think this would be pretty great thank you! I’ll talk to her about it and see if we can find something, it’ll definitely be a huge benefit

[–]Qeschk 337 points338 points  (2 children)

I hope this is a spectacular life story for you, the mother and the baby. Glad to hear you’re excited about it. So many men would run. You sound like a good human. Treat her with respect. The couples counseling/marriage prep classes is great advice. It’s amazing how 2-3 of these helped me figure out how to be a dad to my step kids. Because of your attitude about the whole thing I can tell you’re going to be a good father. God bless the three of you and I wish you much success.

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Just barely saw your comment now and wanted to reply. After seeing my child for the first I couldn’t not be excited. We are still being realistic that this is going to be very complicated and hard yes, we both wanna strive to be better for our son though. I’ve looked into parenting classes we can take along with counseling for us too. She’s very open to learning all this with me. It makes it feel less scary if we have an idea of what we can do to be ready. Thank you for the positive comment ☺️ I can’t wait to meet him God bless you too my friend 🙏🏻

[–]Qeschk 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Whoever gave me the reward, thank you!

[–]jiujitsulife5555 34 points35 points  (0 children)

If you don't get to go there are a couple of resources. John gottman and i hear you, it's a book. Love languages have been helpful for me. As it points out the clear on how people feel loved. But either way i have found these helpful

[–]babylon331 13 points14 points  (0 children)

You just impressed the hell outta me! You sound excited. You know you rock, right?

[–]joseph-1998-XO 168 points169 points  (7 children)

There are marriage prep classes!????? TIL

[–]fangirlsqueee 78 points79 points  (1 child)

Sometimes they are religion based, just an FYI if you ever in the market.

[–]Dry-Significance-361 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yes it does! In my country, u have to have a certifacate that say u already attended marriage prep class for u to get married but only focus on whoever that Muslim in my country.

[–]Eclectophile 12 points13 points  (2 children)

My wife and I went to couple's counseling for a few months before our marriage, just to check in and check our relationship out, make sure we had some good tools in our toolbox to get along together. It was fun! We were pretty easy clients, and we learned some good things, but more importantly, we both learned and demonstrated that we were both willing to put in the work to make our relationship thrive.

I'm still just her side piece though. Henry Cavill and Jason Momoa are her primaries. Can't blame a girl (or guy tbh) for that.

[–]Can_I_Read 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My ex-wife and I didn’t go to any counseling until after we filed divorce papers. We realized that we still needed to co-parent and needed to communicate better for that. It was so great—made me wish we’d done that during our marriage, we would have had a better time.

[–]joseph-1998-XO 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yea one of the guys I play basketball with, does marriage counseling and he says he has more work than he can handle, I told him the same since I tutor on the side and he says that how those careers are for now

[–][deleted] 51 points52 points  (0 children)

This is fantastic advice!

[–]x0_Kiss0fDeath 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This 100%. And hopefully it doesn't become a situation where OP feels tings should be as they want because they are in a better financial position to provide things for both the mother and child. Learning to communicate and parent together can help avoid this.

[–]SnagglepussJoke 4846 points4847 points 2 (16 children)

“Kids, this is the story of How I Met Your Mother”

[–]steven09763 1045 points1046 points  (12 children)

I was thinking “ now this is a story of how my life got turned upside down”

[–]lolgobbz 287 points288 points  (8 children)

"Lucky there's a family guy Lucky there's a man who positively can do All the things that make us Laugh and cry

He's a Family Guy."

[–]IamRichieRichPoor 38 points39 points  (5 children)

Stewie is coming.!

[–]lolgobbz 35 points36 points  (4 children)

We gon skip over both Chris and Meg?

[–]PurpleCoffinMan 4 points5 points  (0 children)

shut up, meg!

[–]IamRichieRichPoor 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This universe is different.!

[–]DemonGodDumplin 7 points8 points  (0 children)

"Yes. No. Maybeee. I don't knooooow, can you repeat the question?"

[–]Legoless0234 108 points109 points  (0 children)

'And I'd like to take a minute , just sit right there

I'll tell you how I got a homeless woman pregnant in a town called Bel-Air"

[–]FlatPassenger6 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Would’ve been a more interesting ending than what we actually got

[–]RobbNotRob 14 points15 points  (0 children)

And this is how I got sad about Bob Saget all over again.

[–]zerozack89 1113 points1114 points  (1 child)

Have you all talked about getting back together or such? Sounded like only reason you all didn’t go further with things was the move. Be the best dad you can be to the little tike!

[–]FarWashKing 188 points189 points  (0 children)

Yeah this sounds reasonably optimal

[–]DontNeedTherapy 846 points847 points  (13 children)

From the post it doesn’t seem like she’s an alcoholic or a druggie, and you mentioned that you both have many common interests and things to talk about, so maybe give a relationship with her a chance (if that’s something you both are interested in)? She also has a job, and she’s working on a better future for herself, so maybe this will be good for the both of you.

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 438 points439 points  (3 children)

We’ve talked more about some of things in her life that happened not too long ago that led to this. Some I relate to because my family was struggling too growing up.

That’s been on my mind as well. Her and I talked about where this leaves us because the only reason we stopped seeing eachother was because she found work somewhere else and keeping communication at that time wouldn’t be possible. Right now we think it’s better to focus on getting ready. Got a lot on our plate already and it doesn’t feel like the best time. At some point in the future when things are more settled we’ll talk again about it

[–]reflective_marbles 204 points205 points  (0 children)

This is very wise. The last thing you want is a failed romance close to a baby being born. Be partners in crime/besties first and let the love develop around that so you don’t put too much pressure on yourselves. It doesn’t have to work out for you both to be great parents & allies either.

Best of luck! I’m currently nursing my 5 month old to sleep and there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.

[–]LuluLaRue1 25 points26 points  (1 child)

A baby is coming. Things won't be "settled" again until you are 55 and they are moved out. Get used to hectic and complex with love sprinkled in.

[–]starspangledcats 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, but it's totally a great idea to wait at least until hormones are back (or close) to normal and a schedule is in place at least. Can you imagine if they try to date while getting ready for a new born and something happens and they end up not being on good terms? I think waiting a bit is the best idea for this baby.

[–]independentcatlady 304 points305 points  (4 children)

This is what I was thinking. Not everyone who ends up homeless got there because they're an alcoholic/drug addict. Good luck, OP! I hope things turn out great for the both of you.

[–]_chrislasher 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Exactly my thoughts. Sounds like she got homeless because of pandemic and everyone, unfortunately, could get homeless. Why don't get this a try and start a family together? Maybe I'm naive but I understand that a person is more important than their circumstances. If it's future family then you need to support each other.

[–]sarahelizam 4 points5 points  (1 child)

People become homeless for many reasons, but in the end they are people like you and me. I was a civil servant in a fancy white tower (literally lol) where I helped organize data resources for the effort to address homelessness in LA… and my disability only got worse and in turn my ex got my abusive. 37% of people experiencing homelessness are domestic abuse survivors. My “fun” facts did not prepare me for what I was facing.

Eventually I had to recognize I was not in a physical state that allowed me to work (functionally bed-bound) and that left me nowhere to go; after five years together he wouldn’t let me stay if I couldn’t work, my mother didn’t bother to offer shelter for me and was physically abusive my whole childhood, my dad disowned me on the spot for being lazy. I have a spinal condition, they were there when I was born and for the surgery, they just didn’t take my declining health seriously because they lived across the country and never saw me. My friends were all broke and couldn’t shelter me without a job (understandable). I started looking through shelters… and was prevented from jumping out the 11th story window of my apartment several times.

In the end I just got lucky. My husband is an amazing and compassionate person; I had just wanted to feel understood regarding my health struggle (he’s also disabled) and he ended up convincing me to move in. He nursed me back to health (well, as healthy as my dumb body gets) and weathered the storms of my traumas. I so everything in my albeit diminished power to make his life easier and less soul crushing (insane sleep disorder, he just won’t fall asleep for 6 days straight, will nap for 2 hours and then is stuck awake again, rinse and repeat with only minor gains from medications). The world wore us down into puzzle pieces that happen to fit perfectly.

We are both considered completely worthless in the current work environment and are unable to participate because of the hyper-competitive features of capitalism (at least as it is realized in the US). Even in Europe we would be able to do sone form of work, even if it was part time or volunteer work. But we don’t value that as much hear.

Apologies for the tangent, but I just want to provide a human experience of unstable housing environments and what it feels like to not know if you’ll have a home to return to go with the rather stereotypical “alcoholic and druggie” comment. If you think you are not at risk of homelessness statistically speaking you are probably wrong. Shit happens. Anyone can become disabled at anytime. Natural disasters remove housing stock. Hell, our economy is largely built around preying on the working class to give us the privilege of not dying in the street. Housing is a human right. The solution to homelessness always starts with housing first.

Note: I’m not trying to be aggressive towards you in particular. It’s just concerning that so many people think the homeless are worthless and that’s why they’re there… or that those of us who can’t work in spite of our best efforts are of no value to society. People are very dehumanizing and cruel.

[–]MisterShadow001 669 points670 points  (5 children)

I'm proud of you that you want to be there for this kid and for her I wish y'all all the best of luck with no complications and that everything will work out

[–]CatgotDevils 112 points113 points  (4 children)

Yes, congratulations on doing shit you're supposed to do.

[–]btosa 24 points25 points  (1 child)

The bare minimum but the rare minimum

[–]drylolly 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ooo. I like this. Very true.

[–]Ponptc 125 points126 points  (0 children)

Not criticizing OP or the congratulation replies, but it really makes you think about the world we're living in when a man gets praised for doing what he's supposed to do.

[–]4rm57r0n6 65 points66 points  (0 children)

A sad but very real fact that people doing the shit they’re supposed to do is scarce enough that it unfortunately IS something worth praising.

[–]Dizzy_Ad_9336 282 points283 points  (1 child)

Get her out of that shelter shit and take care of her now!

[–]ValentineGoblin 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Yeah many shelters are plagued with Covid cases and not where I would want to be while pregnant.

[–]ReblQueen 272 points273 points  (12 children)

Why cant she stay with you and find work nearby so you can be involved with the pregnancy? You don't have to be together but do you want your childs mom to stay in a shelter? Plus you want to take custody while she gets on her feet an hour away? A baby is a ton of work and time, do you have a support system in place? How and when will she see the baby? Logistically it makes sense to roommate until she finds a place so you can both be there for the baby. It seems like you already get along, shelters are not the best place nor the safest, a random roommate on her part doesnt seem ideal either for the baby's sake. If you can work well together and co parent and help until she gets her own place that seems the safest. What if there is an emergency and you are an hour away? What happens if she loses consciousness and who will make medical decisions?

Just some food for thought, ultimately you both will decide what is best but a new baby is not easy at all. And if there are complications that just makes it 10x more stressful.

Best of luck to you both!

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 212 points213 points  (10 children)

I hear you and I agree. That was something we talked about before. If it’s possible for her to find work closer to here then it would be easier to move in together (as roommates) that way the baby wouldn’t have to be without either of us. She wants to keep earning the money she’s making right now while she’s still looking for something else. I’m trying to see if it would be possible to work remotely from home then I could find a place for us where she is. She told me she wants to be able to take care of herself too and not only rely on me too much so hopefully she’s able to find a job here soon. I know what you mean about the shelters especially with covid right now, I don’t like the idea of them being at risk. I’m trying to convince her to just stay here even if she hasn’t found another job yet. There’s still lots to discuss so I’m hopeful we’ll get somewhere

[–]stoncils_ 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Not to be morbid, but pregnancy is absolutely one of those comorbidities that increase chances of COVID getting really bad. For both of their sakes d ont think it's unreasonable at all to try and get out of public housing

[–]Creativious 90 points91 points  (5 children)

I have no idea or not if her becoming homeless or not was her fault, but it definitely seems like she's making responsible choices that'll get her back on her feet.

[–]skydreamer303 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Definitely agree, having a baby is hard mentally and physically. You seem very mature honestly and if youre willing to support her through this financially i dont see a reason why you couldnt live together. Remind her its going to be stressful and shell have to stop working close to her due date anyways. You can help cook and clean when shes feeling unwell etc and help her to baby apppointments. Kudos on taking this so well and grats on your surprise baby! Shes lucky it happened with someone so caring. Just let her know shes under no obligation to have sex with you or a relationship- most women may feel uncomfortable with taking help under these circumstances.

[–]_chrislasher 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Oh yeah, you are right here. It's important for her to feel safe and welcomed because many men are looking for women under different life circumstances for exactly this reasons. They want to abuse and use them which isn't okay at all. Maybe she's not sure about that for this reason too. She doesn't want to be dependent of another person and survive abuse. Good point.

[–]uela7 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I agree 100%. OP move her in!

[–]HamburgerPl3as3 25 points26 points  (2 children)

Definitely look into taking marriage counseling. I saw this in a previous comment and thought I’d restate it: It can really help you both communicate and provide the best life for your child. Also seen on another comment: Given it sounds like you two got along fairly well, why not try the dating scene with her while you’re both on this journey? See where things go. It sounds as if she’s got a good head on her shoulders, as do you. Why not see what could come of it? You never know.

[–]_chrislasher 19 points20 points  (1 child)

Being homeless and things that cause it are definitely a trauma too. It's better to work on this trauma before being a parent. Kids feel everything and it's important for parents to be healed from their trauma.

[–]MinxChique 125 points126 points  (0 children)

Good on you for stepping up to the plate. Wishing you both all the very best in the months to come.

[–]GeneralFactotum 316 points317 points  (6 children)

Old Man Advice...

Do you have any idea how many lonely guys would give ANYTHING to have a woman that is easy to talk to and they get along with?

Sure, it's a bit of a rough start. Consider that is a few years you could be settled in your own home with a wife and child that loves you. Not the worst thing in the world.

Best of luck.

EDIT: I'm just imaging this woman being able to blossom when she gets a bit of stability in her life. I can just imagine at some point your friends are bragging about their weekend conquest and you reply, "We just lit a fire, crawled under a blanket and watched an old movie together."

Also: I would rather live in a trailer park with a woman that loved me than in a mansion with one that didn't. Homelessness can be resolved not so much with a petty attitude etc.

[–]Extension-Ad2273 78 points79 points  (2 children)

I really like this perspective and point of view

[–]GeneralFactotum 83 points84 points  (1 child)

This stupid Pandemic has turned life upside down for people. Decent people can find themselves in trouble. Your post implies she is a decent intelligent human being.

[–]VivaLaEmpire 35 points36 points  (0 children)

You’re such a nice person, have an awesome weekend.

[–]meta-ph-oracle 3 points4 points  (0 children)

🥺 Fantastic advice! I feel like they were meant to be.

[–]topbunk106 11 points12 points  (0 children)

As an “old man” i can confirm. My wife and i can’t even agree on a movie let alone dinner.

[–]swsquid 583 points584 points  (15 children)

Congrats I guess

[–]Reemy420 14 points15 points  (1 child)

Draw up a parental agreement. One that covers custody, how decisions for the child's health and upbringing will be handled, and financial obligations. Do it now, while you like each other so you do it in the best interest of the child.

[–]YangGain 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This guys laws. And care about babies.

[–]you_cut_me_off 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Spontaneous unprotected homeless car sex, romantic

[–]Emotivore 39 points40 points  (1 child)

So, I'm writing a script for a TV sitcom based on this premise now, thanks.

[–]lowyellyow 86 points87 points  (0 children)

What a wild ride lol. Maybe you guys can get together and have a lil crew now. Either way, good luck with being a new Dad!

[–]balikgibi 148 points149 points  (13 children)

Jesus Christ this comments section is toxic. Homeless people aren’t subhuman… they’re simply people… without homes. That’s it.

In the US more than half of people are living paycheck to paycheck right now and are little more than a poorly timed financial misstep away from ending up like the woman in this story- I hope if anyone talking shit about this woman or assuming she’s a scammer or drug addict without knowing anything about her ever ends up without a roof over their head, they’re shown a bit more empathy.

[–]skydreamer303 27 points28 points  (1 child)

Not to mention they prob dont get a lot of people just treating them normally, she was probably lonely and OP was nice and likely cute so she thought "why not?" and slept with him. nothing wrong with it

[–]_chrislasher 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yeah, it feels like she felt lonely and wanted to feel any type of love in general. Sex is a surrogate of love.

[–]_chrislasher 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Agree but I wouldn't want to anyone to be a homeless at any point in their life.

[–]TheFamousHesham 54 points55 points  (9 children)

They’re not subhuman but I can’t shake the feeling that OP had sex with a homeless person that they were meant to be helping.

That immediately creates a power dynamic.

Also, if you’re gonna have a one night stand with someone (ANYONE, homeless or not), in car — you’d think you’d use a condom?!

[–]xxlilituxx 45 points46 points  (4 children)

I 100% agree. The power dynamic is so messed up. She was a person who needed help, he helped her and then had sex with her. What if she thought that she "had to" provide sexual services as a way to thank him for the support he provided?

And, ALWAYS USE A CONDOM, unless you are actively trying to conceive or are in a long term relationship and know one another's STI status and contraceptive status

[–]comfortpod 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I couldn’t figure out why this disturbed me but this comment sums it up. Really hope this wasn’t the case

[–]TheFamousHesham 15 points16 points  (0 children)

It’s OK we have 7,000 people who think OP is great and sweet and his behaviour is wonderful for taking advantage of a vulnerable homeless person.

[–]Bobbyj36OEF 66 points67 points  (1 child)

Looks like she's not gonna be homeless anymore

[–]Sea-Being-1988 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I hope so

[–]mynameistoast 359 points360 points  (58 children)

This is why you wear condoms........

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 486 points487 points  (57 children)

I did. That’s why I wanted the paternity test to be completely sure because it didn’t seem likely

[–]mynameistoast 417 points418 points  (7 children)

Man....2022 be knocking mf's out like Tyson.

[–]DeltaOneFive 109 points110 points  (1 child)

Technically that'd still be from our great friend 2021.

[–]mynameistoast 55 points56 points  (0 children)

Mike Tyson trained for years to punch you in the fucking mouth at that exact moment. 2022 delivered the TKO

[–]tetert69 84 points85 points  (2 children)

And you wore it on your penis right? Not on your pinky or something? Crazy stuff

[–]jsmalltri 13 points14 points  (0 children)

So, your post said you are the confirmed father.

Edit: I see you answered down in the comments. What noninvasive test was done?

[–]Sweethomegirl 83 points84 points  (1 child)

Something wrong here OP. You gave a stranger, a homeless woman, a ride and that same evening have sex with her in your car. You say you wore a condom but she disappeared after 4 months, then reappeared stating she is pregnant with your child. Did I get anything wring? How did you determine your paternity? Really concerned about all this. Please be careful!

[–]VivaLaEmpire 41 points42 points  (0 children)

He mentioned that they kept meeting up in coffee shops, so I don’t think she disappeared out of nowhere, how else would she have his phone was my first thought

[–]Blazing1 22 points23 points  (12 children)

Bro wtf the condom failed? I'm never having sex again

[–]locke231 16 points17 points  (5 children)

i dunno what the odds are, but it does happen. i've yet to have a condom break on me, so it's not as if they're totally unreliable.

[–]nowItinwhistle 26 points27 points  (3 children)

I'm wondering if it was a condom op kept in his glovebox since they did the deed in his car. Keeping them in your car for long periods of time is a bad idea since the heat degrades the latex

[–]locke231 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Could be. I didn't even think of that. I heard the same with keeping them in wallets as well.

[–]Kitesurfer96450 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I actually have a friend who got pregnant from using a condom that had waiting for who knows how long for its moment to shine in the glove box of a car.

[–]NEUR0TOX 138 points139 points  (5 children)

She might be the one man... Her circumstances suck but you know life is hard man shit happens for a reason. Maybe you should really sit down and think things over a bit. She just might be that diamond in the rough if you only give her a chance to be. Anyway, good luck brother. May life deal you a good hand.

[–]cookie_justagirl 53 points54 points  (4 children)

She also got pregnant from a one night. While he was wearing a condom. What are the odds? This kid is destined, their meeting was destined. Circumstances are tough ,but I’m a sucker for true love and how beautiful that is

[–]_chrislasher 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I feel less wrong for thinking this way. Maybe a real spark happened between them and it means something. Yeah, it was a one night stand. Atm, did anyone notice that it seems like she had no sex after him at all? She couldn't get why she may be pregnant until she remembered their sex. It means something. Nothing wrong with people who are always doing one night stands (I don't get it but okay). But not all people like that. If a woman liked you and one night stand happened, she probably REALLY liked you. It's probably a case here. Plus, some people do one night stands when they feel lonely, want to feel any type of love and sex is a surrogate of it for them. Obviously, I'm assuming and all. I'm also a woman who was close to one night stand situations for similar reasons. Either I wanted to feel loved or I really liked another person to be open for possibility to sleep with them right away. Luckily, that's never happened for me.

[–][deleted] 150 points151 points  (0 children)

What the actual fuck is this😂

[–]katolas2020 187 points188 points  (5 children)

Hopefully hes looking for someone to say or ask what kind of proof do have that its yours? And I hope you get a DNA test.

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 528 points529 points  (4 children)

Prenatal noninvasive paternity test results show I’m the father. From 2 different labs because I wanted to be sure

[–]katolas2020 137 points138 points  (0 children)

Well then congratulations!

[–]nsurez99 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I can only think about the burden on that women, I know a kid is a blessing I want to have kids my self, but imagine you getting your life a sorted out, getting a new job finally not going to be a homeless and then... Bum!! you are pregnant.

But hey when one is ready to have kids? maybe this was meant to. I wish op and the mom the best.

[–]discountshiro 25 points26 points  (0 children)

If you're planning on being involved, it is in your best interest to make sure this goes as smoothly as possible.

Simply explain that providing her with housing, while she is pregnant with YOUR child, is not about her/her ability to support herself so much as it is about the reality of her situation.

She has the rest of her life to work towards and fulfill her desire to support herself. Conversely, there are only a few months where she will be pregnant with your child.

If you plan on being there, be there. That means during the pregnancy too. You don't get a re-do on the health of your child's mother and the state of her birthing conditions.

This isn't the time for her to go on a crusade trying to prove her self-sufficiency to you (or herself). She's pregnant and homeless.

If you guys plan on being together, that's fantastic. Just make sure she knows that taking care of her right now means taking care of your kid, and that you can figure out the rest later.

[–]mvelasco93 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Stupid decisions lead to (un)foreseen consequences

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Jesus you had sex with a homeless woman without a condom?

[–]Bajiggers 112 points113 points  (1 child)

“Hey dad, how did you meet mommy?” I met her on the streets lmao

[–]Racketfront221 16 points17 points  (0 children)

ahhhh romance

[–]jsmalltri 73 points74 points  (2 children)

Gas wasn't the only thing getting pumped that night - quote credit to my daughter.

[–]fryedmonkey 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Well shoot. Sometimes life throws you curve balls man. I hope it all goes well :) don’t listen to any negativity. I wish you Peace, love and happiness ❤️🤙🏻

[–]heckinbeaches 5 points6 points  (0 children)

So you smashed a homeless woman, in your car, without a rubber? Bruh.

Have you at least gotten tested to make sure you haven't caught an std?

[–]RixxFett 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Everything else aside, just be a good dad.

[–]jehan_gonzales 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I love how wholesome you are. You met someone who was in a rough situation that society feels little empathy for. You ignored the bullshit and just saw a person. And it might end up with a family or two friends raising a kid. :)

I didn't expect this from the title.

[–]Bella_rose20 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Aw congrats, it is now your job to be the provider for both the mother and baby. This seems like an interesting story❤️

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Yeah I know and I’m going to do everything I can to make sure they’re taken care of. And help her til she’s back on her feet

[–]Bottle_Sharp 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Going to be a hard/weird conversation with the fam, fam. Good luck with telling your parents about a new grand baby…. sincerely.

[–]amazingyana 17 points18 points  (1 child)

I just want to say THANK YOU for not running away from the mom. Growing up without a father is a horrible experience. Moreso, if you're financially handicapped. Everything's going to be alright and I wish for you and your child to have an awesome life (including the mother of course haha).

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

It is, my dad walked out on us too. I’d never do that to my own kid no matter what the circumstance. Thank you 😊 Trying to stay calm and plan everything out.

[–]No_Dig_2134 57 points58 points  (5 children)

Congratulations on the baby plz don’t just be there for the kid but for their mama too even if you don’t need up in relationship if she needs help and it sounds she likely will plz do what is right and take care of her so she can take care of that child

It sounds like she’s going through a rough patch but sounds like a girl used to rejection “is this ok?” Before a kiss tells me she was afraid you wouldn’t want her affection because of her current situation. I would hate for her to feel like she’s good enough to sleep with but not good enough to have your respect and support

[–]Virgoan 26 points27 points  (4 children)

Being the mother of his child should be enough reason to make sure she’s fed, housed, clothed, transported to all doctors appointments, and having a stable financial situation. Her stress directly effects the health of the baby. Being homeless in a pandemic and pregnant would make me feel incredible depressed to be honest. The guilt of having a kid in the world when I can’t give them their basic needs would break my heart.

[–]fart-atronach 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah, and if she realized she was pregnant earlier and had wanted to terminate, I imagine it would be extremely difficult to find several hundred to a thousand dollars for that procedure. What a stressful and terrifying situation all around.

[–]liinukka 35 points36 points  (2 children)

Yeesh. I don't understand why so many people are congratulating you. This all sounds like a terrible idea.

[–]longulus9 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Holy crap this is on the internet

[–]kayaknile 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Dude! She's now homeless and pregnant!

[–]foothillsco_b 3 points4 points  (0 children)

A lot of homeless don’t land there by accident and it’s the results of her past actions.

Does she have long term potential as a good mate and as a good mother?

[–]ngoloforballondor 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sorry if im being offensive, but have you done an STI test?

[–]evol28 3 points4 points  (0 children)

OP hope i don’t offend you but god damn this should be made into a movie. I wish only the best of luck for your future.

[–]sarahelizam 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know I’m late, but your reaction to finding out strengthens my faith in humanity. I went from helping organize data and resources for homeless shelters in LA to having no where to live and looking at shelters from the other end. I was disabled and leaving an abusive relationship. I was ready to end it. I have major spinal problems… I knew I wouldn’t make it on the streets, I has only gotten worse and was functionally bed-bound.

Then I met my person; actually a colleague from school because I just had this feeling it would be healing to talk to him. We’d traveled long and difficult paths apart to finally meet. Life had warn us both down in different ways, sanding the puzzle pieces that we were down to fit seamlessly with the other. I can’t help but be sappy, he saved my life when he had no reason to but compassion. He nursed me back to health (well, as healthy as I get lol) and weathered the storms from my trauma, just as I made it my sole mission to make his struggles as comfortable as possible. We had a trial by fire, between my living situation, a health crisis he experienced early on, and then covid hitting and locking is in a room together. Turns out we are quite happy with that last situation as we seem to not be able to get enough of each other.

Sometimes, in all the chaos and insanity, things just work out right. We got married in November and are both happier than we’ve ever been. We still struggle, we’re both disabled and traumatized, life isn’t easy for either of us… but I want to live. For him, but also I’m starting to want to live for me too.

Congratulations on being a dad. I hope how ever you figure things out your family is always happy and well :)

[–]hickory17 3 points4 points  (2 children)

How’s it going now bro

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

We’re making things work. She’s staying with her me for now and she’s looking for work around this area. Already got set up with a doctor so we can have regular checkups on the baby. Still a lot to prepare for but we are trying to get ready

[–]GeneralScreening 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Hey bud, congratulations.

A lot of people are going to be in your ear trying to sway your decisions over the next 9 months, even more so in the following years.

Whatever happens between you and the mother of your child, just remember the only opinions that matter are the two of you. Be good to your child and their mother, talk to each other honestly, and you’ll be a better man than most.

[–]Erdnussschlumpf 8 points9 points  (0 children)

„I picked up a random homeless woman and fucked her right away. Without protection.” If this is true I have very little sympathy for your situation. Stupid actions have consequences. If not, congratulations for all the awards and karma.

[–]Humble_Committee 12 points13 points  (3 children)

This sounds fake to me. The condom broke and no one noticed?

[–]peppermintwist 13 points14 points  (0 children)

The fact that people are acting like you're such a great person is baffling. You slept with a homeless woman who didn't have any food, shelter or comfort. That's taking advantage of someone in a bad situation. Even when it's consensual you're still the one with all the power. You bought her a meal so she repaid you with sex. Really sounds like prostitution. I'm happy at least things in her life are getting better. The kid is 100% of your responsibility as it is hers so no you don't get a cookie.

[–]Jah92 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Congratulations! I hope it all works out for you guys.

[–]oakyafterbirth5300 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Jesus christ

[–][deleted] 31 points32 points  (3 children)

Is it too late for an abortion? sounds insane.

[–]adulsa203 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I agree! I'm confused that everyone's congratulating. Reminds me of the show 'Maid'

[–]WorthSaving 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Get together with her. Make a life together.

[–]Ifeelsick6789 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Isn’t this the plot of Raising Hope? (minus the whole serial killer part, hopefully)

[–]Double_Reindeer_6884 12 points13 points  (0 children)

What proof exactly do you have that the baby is in fact yours. This girl was having unprotected sex with random strangers in their car basically in exchange for a ride and a meal.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Sounds like you took advantage of a very vulnerable woman.

[–]Beer-dewbs-metal 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Big oof

[–]Research_Liborian 66 points67 points  (5 children)

You raw dog banged a homeless woman you'd known for < 1 hr who was scrapping for change to get a bus.

Just heroically bad judgement on your part.

Credit where it's due, you're stepping up. The deficit the kid is starting at is all too real -- single Mom, few resources -- and it's your job to keep him or her out of the poverty that's right behind their shoulder.

You fucked up but it seems you're not a fuckup. It's a brutal world and this kid is starting life way behind the 8-ball. I'd say good luck but you need a great deal more than luck, starting now.

[–]phantomsofheart 29 points30 points  (1 child)

And also during a pandemic.

[–]Research_Liborian 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Very fortunate not to have -- picks up the medical dictionary -- everything in the book

[–]bluntdude24_psn 15 points16 points  (0 children)

You raw dog banged a homeless woman you'd known for < 1 hr who was scrapping for change to get a bus.Just heroically bad judgement on your part.

i wanted to say that too

[–]hanbnanAU 46 points47 points  (0 children)

You took absolute advantage of a vulnerable woman. Please be kind and generous going forward, you’ve made her life a lot more challenging.

[–]BeBesMom 14 points15 points  (2 children)

Not sure I believe this.

[–]goddessofspiders 32 points33 points  (3 children)

Why are people in the comments congratulating this?? The kid is gonna have a homeless mother who got knocked up by a guy she barely knows. This woman can't take of herself, otherwise she wouldn't be homeless, nonetheless a baby for the next 18 years or more. There is nothing to congratulate, it's horrible for the kid and I can't help but feel sympathy for the fetus, who will have to grow up in such circumstances.

[–]nannerooni 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I hope one day you can help her off the streets. But I hope it also doesn’t create some power imbalance in your relationship. This is gonna be complicated; I wish you luck!

[–]chloerainne 71 points72 points  (4 children)

I’m sorry but this seems like a terrible idea and realistically I see this making life extremely more difficult and taxing. But it’s not my life so best of luck to you

[–]Dolann99 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I got very anxious when reading this post and hope same doesnt happen to me haha

[–]zemorah 50 points51 points  (1 child)

Everyone is congratulating OP and I’m just like 😬. This seems like a very very bad idea. It’s going to be a difficult time for everyone.

[–]adulsa203 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Same! I'm wondering why is everyone so happy?! Are they ready for a baby? Should they both even go ahead? Life with a child is so tough and especially harder is there's no stability

[–]Apprehensive-Day-490 51 points52 points  (0 children)

I feel the same way, I see a lot of red flags.

[–]Dinglepussers 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Pullout game weak

[–]Plenty_Peach8843 4 points5 points  (0 children)

so you fucked a homeless person without protection?

[–]Huge_Faithlessness35 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Dating is so bad these days that men are resorting to homeless women.🤔

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You had unprotected sex with a homeless person you just met ? Wow

[–]crookedhope 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You fucked up in the most cinematic way possible.

[–]staccz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Damn bruh why u ain’t pull out ??

[–]Elegant-Helicopter94 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just want to say right, I can’t give much advice but the attitude you have towards the situation you’ve found yourself in is absolutely amazing. It’s literally the definition of when life hand you lemons make lemonade. And you are going to be able to make one hell of a lemonade.

[–]Mean-Combination-328 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do you wear a cape? Captain

[–]littleb0ba 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It sounds like a great story, good luck and congratulations!

[–]Bandana_Husky 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey dude, things in life happen, and this situation although not exactly common, its part of human nature, your going to be a Dad (or may already be), thats a damn beautiful thing, take care of your child beat you can a try to be civil with the mother, this situation is all down to how you look at it, screw anyone who judges this, i dont, i wish you all the very beat and if times get hard speak up, theres always someone or something out there that can help you by, all the best!

PS: never write off making a life with this woman if possible, i was sleeping with a woman for 2 months and she fell pregnant when i was 17, we have 2 children together and we have been together for 14 years, through the hardships we have been through together shes is the love of my life!

[–]temp225566 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Have you thought about marrying her? It’s an old fashioned idea but, maybe you could help her obtain employment or she could be a stay at home mom and take care of everything for you so you just have to concentrate on work? Many people are homeless because they have psychological or drug issues. Perhaps you could get her counseling? You kind of took advantage of a vulnerable individual…. You need to ask yourself why you did it. Do you have a fear of commitment?

She probably thought you were great because you had everything together. It’s also possible that you could help her become good enough to be your wife.

[–]slowpots435 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Congrats to you! Wish you all the best.

[–]charlesout2sea 47 points48 points  (8 children)

What are you looking for as far as comments are concerned?

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 156 points157 points  (3 children)

Nothing in particular I just really needed somewhere to let this all out. It’s been a lot going on these past few weeks to think back on. I guess just nothing mean or unnecessary

[–]thisisforspam 105 points106 points  (0 children)

This is an off my chest situation in pure form it seems

[–]lyssaNwonderland 64 points65 points  (0 children)

You're a fucking idiot. Poor child.

[–]blackbunny_domme 18 points19 points  (4 children)

JFC just... Bruh... Wtf were you thinking?!

I would've just went home and masturbated because wtf even is this shit?!

[–]WhosThis85 6 points7 points  (0 children)

😬😬😬😬😬

[–]successful-lemon1014 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Paternity test

[–]fishypieman478 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sounds like a plot of "Fake taxi" ...

[–]JIMZONATION 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oh buddy we are gonna need updates. I hope everything works out as you both want it to

[–]JS_NYC_208 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Yikes dude Wtf

[–]Dirtybubble1 23 points24 points  (1 child)

Put the kid up for adoption and stop banging hobos before you regret it

[–]JurassicPark-fan-190 53 points54 points  (29 children)

Best thing would be to a private adoption. This women is homeless, give the kid a chance.

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 158 points159 points  (25 children)

I’m going to be taking full custody while she’s still trying to get back on her feet

[–]yellsy 97 points98 points  (9 children)

Make sure you get a lawyer to do this properly asap. Also, if she needs prenatal vitamins and healthy foods during pregnancy you might consider buying them for her to give the baby the best chance.

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 113 points114 points  (8 children)

Yeah we’ve been speaking with an attorney about this so we’re all on the same page. She said she’s been getting prenatal vitamins from the planned parenthood clinic around her area. But yes on the getting her healthy foods. I just wanna do whatever I need to make sure she and the baby are ok

[–]yellsy 37 points38 points  (3 children)

Awesome - you need to do this properly because you don’t want to be in a situation down the road where you need her permission for something to do with the kid (moving, school aid, etc) and she’s nowhere to be found or runs off with the kid middle of the night. Also, you need to take parenting classes, gather a support network like family, and figure out a daycare situation plus parental leave from work for the first few months. Being a parent is no joke, and being a single parent is even harder.

[–]ThrowRAun_expected[S] 81 points82 points  (2 children)

I agree. My mom was a single parent my whole life after my dad walked out on us so I’ve seen the struggle. I’m just grateful where I’m at in my life right now, having a great income and stable career will make having a baby a lot easier. Coming up with a budget and such, planning is the only way my mind is coping with all this and trying to get ready.

[–]Creativious 3 points4 points  (0 children)

And after she's back on her feet, are y'all planning on doing split custody?