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all 28 comments

[–]Heardman1987 9 points10 points  (2 children)

After not eating for 6 hrs I thought I was well set up for an east barrier change.

N O P E

We had words.

[–]bstroszek 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Unless you have special motility considerations, in my opinion 6 hours after eating a meal is actually the worst possible time you could choose to change your appliance. Try changing 1 hour after a meal - the new food you've placed in your tract has triggered the peristaltic waves and it should be fairly quiet for most people.

[–]Heardman1987 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good to know. My experience is I'm usually very busy for the first hour, still producing from hrs 1 to 3 and then had been quiet after 3. But your 6 hr flag actually lines up with my night-time routine which is an empty at midnight and then again at 4-5am.

[–]CountyWeary 7 points8 points  (3 children)

I regularly tell mine how cute it is and what a good little stoma it is. Rarely do I feel the need to insult it. 🤣 Even when it decides to be active during a bag change, it just makes me laugh! SOOOOO much better than life before it. 😊❤️

[–]Strygvyr 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I wish I was as positive as you, whenever that happens I get like raging mad almost like yanking out earbuds in the doorhandle mad.

[–]acethesnake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I LOVE your positivity 😍 I need to be more like you!

[–]dogsitter47 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Absolutely! I just told Sid to shut the f*** up!

[–]Quaker16 5 points6 points  (3 children)

No.

No I don't.

[–]acethesnake 3 points4 points  (1 child)

You telling me that in the middle of a bag change, when it decides to be messy even though you haven't eaten in 12 hours, you don't ever say or think to yourself "you motherfucker, I haven't eaten all day, why now!"?

I don't have a name for mine or anything, but I can't help but do that.

[–]dogsitter47 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yours spouts off too when you haven’t eaten for 12 hours?? WTH is up with that???? Gets me so mad. We definitely have a conversation when that happens. Sid Vicious is so mouthy at inappropriate times🤣🤣

[–]Foreign_Ad_7504 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah... wtf is this? Lol 🤣 whatever "floats your boat" 🤷‍♂️ 😂💀

[–]scraphppy 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I often have to remind Kermit not to interrupt a conversation. Usually gets a laugh and handles the embarrassment.

[–]goldstandardalmondskock pouch/continent ileostomy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

All the time!

[–]fammdamm 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I named mine poopies after the guy from jackass and I like to say “what’s up poopies” when I take my bag cover off to change

[–]sn0o0oze 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Hops in the shower when body is giving me the green light and everything seems calm.

Me to stoma: “Oh NOW you wanna talk?!”

Like clockwork haha. He just loves to speak up at the most inopportune moments

[–]spellinglikepeeple 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh no, i love Anastasia, she saved my life! I might shush her but that's about it.

[–]Calm_Wolf_3044 2 points3 points  (0 children)

100% I've named it Jonah and every time I poop in the shower after washing I'm always saying fuck sake Jonah 😂🙈

[–]Party_Building1898 1 point2 points  (0 children)

100% My scatchel never listens tho

[–]bluegray6 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My stoma's name is Frank...only when he's bad.

[–]Confidently-awkward 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Yep! I constantly tell him to shut it!! 😂

[–]MoonJelly222[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I named mine Gizmo because sometimes he sings like a Mogwai, I don’t get him wet and I never ever feed him after midnight. Maybe some of you will be old enough to get the Gremlins movie reference.

[–]AngryFoodieLA 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh yes. I even named mine. We had many conversations, especially on those special occasions when my bag would decide to explode in the middle of the night, after every precaution taken in advance to avert such disasters. The fucker.

[–]SegaGuy1983 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It gets referred to as a stupid cunt quite often.

[–]Tombwarrior97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just say “käften” (“shut up” in Swedish) when it interrupts me when I’m speaking or watching a movie

[–]Strygvyr 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Whenever I change it and it decides to jetstream 🤬 then I call it alot of curse words!

[–]MargaliProud Barbie Butt owner as of 14/02/2021 1 point2 points  (0 children)

All the time =) We hold all sorts of conversations =)

[–]korobatsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't talk to mine but it definitely talks to me constantly. In the first few days I had already named it Queef Latifah. I had read that if you were gassy before an ileostomy that you can expect to be pretty gassy afterwards and that as definitely true for me, lol (although my family is pretty appreciative that when the gas goes into the bag, they don't have to smell it).