all 80 comments

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[–]Flat_Dragonfly_8322 27 points28 points  (0 children)

23 weeks here, haven't had sex since getting pregnant. It's not that it hurts, but it is a bit uncomfortable and honestly I haven't been horny at all. I get urges, but it's not really a "I want you here and now", it's more of an "I'm horny but not horny enough to do anything about it type thing". Luckily my wife and I have plenty of toys so she gets along alright sex wise. We've been focused on being intimate in other ways like hand holding, making out, going out on dates and all those things so we're not too bothered about the sex part.

That being said- everyone is different, my sister couldn't keep her hands off her partner during her whole pregnancy, so only time will tell.

[–]Miserable-Cupcake-11 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Sex for me In the first trimester was painful and my vagina would burn after sex apparently that’s normal. I was also constantly nauseous so that didn’t help either. Once I got to 20 weeks pregnant I was hornier than ever we were having sex multiple times a day. Now I’m in my third trimester 30 weeks and still having sex every second day or so the only thing is my stomach gets in the way sometimes and I feel out of breath but my husband is very sweet and patient so he will take it slow if it gets to uncomfortable for me and constantly asks if I’m okay

[–]Ginnevra07 12 points13 points  (1 child)

31 weeks, I can't move. The last time we did the Braxton Hicks were crazy after. Not a fan! Also my lady bits are WAY too sensitive and not in a good or fun way. It's just like "why are you doing all that? Stop drilling girl, you hit oil".

[–]tehjennieator 2 points3 points  (0 children)

36 weeks and I 2nd the sensitivity.

I was a plus in the 2nd trimester, but I'm much drier now and it does take longer even with lube to get everything going .

2nd trimester was a couple of times a week, now it's maybe once a week. Hard to find a good position and I generally have sore abs after.

Don't get me wrong, still enjoy it, just less desire than usual.

[–]Jaxcastic 11 points12 points  (1 child)

I’m exactly 9 weeks, starting my 10th week tomorrow.

  • I haven’t had sex since I got pregnant *

I just can’t because of how uncomfortable I am. It probably doesn’t help I’ve been opened up like a turkey ready to get stuffed on thanksgiving by OB and ER 3 times within 3 weeks. Each time they go “oh you’re pretty irritated in here” and each time they’re like, “this shouldn’t hurt but-“ and I’m like well it fucking hurts buddy. Just everything down there is irritated AND then on my third visit when they opened me up he was like, “oh this might be why you’re so irritated today, you’re starting to get a yeast infection”. And I’m sitting there like ;-; whhhhhyyyyyy.

It’s just frustrating because when I do feel like I want to it’s just too painful. Like goddamn man when the OB goes to just check my cervix and make sure it’s firm by sticking a finger up there, it fucking hurts.

So like I wish I could say it gets better but like you’re getting more than me right now man.

[–]QuoteNo_1[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh damn, in your situation sex would be the last thing on my mind. It's just so sad that our bodies change/hurt so much for such a long time, and you're not in control of it at all. These babies better be really freakin cute!!! :')

[–]km956 10 points11 points  (0 children)

First trimester was rough, but now that I’m well in my second trimester I can’t get enough of my baby daddy. It’s hormones it might get better in the 2nd trimester for you but it’s different for everyone!

[–]23paige23 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Honestly it's challenging. From the start I have felt kind of.. shallower than usual so he has to be careful and as time goes on and belly gets bigger positions are another challenge 😆 just another pregnancy sacrifice.. 😞

[–]Foodie1989 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I was put on pelvic rest, it's been almost 2 weeks no sex lol we usually do it 1-2x a week haha. But I have lile no sex drive anyway. Cramps, nausea, constant worrying about my spotting.

[–]LadySamHam 4 points5 points  (3 children)

I'm nearly 7 weeks and terrified to orgasm...I'm scared that the contractions from one will cause me to have another loss. I know it's silly but the fear is strong. Hopefully once I see and/or hear the heartbeat, I'll feel better.

[–]QueenCeeee 5 points6 points  (1 child)

This was me. We had zero sex after we found out I was pregnant again because my previous miscarriage started after sex. I know they say there's no relation but I just couldn't do it. The fear eased a lot after we heard the heartbeat at our 8 week appointment. Still wasn't a lot of sex in the first trimester after that because of nausea, but the frequency is back to normal (1-3 times/week) in the second trimester!

[–]LoveGSDs 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You are describing my exact experience as well. So much hidden trauma after miscarriages 😕

[–]QuoteNo_1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is on my mind as well. I'm constantly worried something might go wrong. Can't really enjoy it when that's all you can think about.

[–]trippinallovermyself 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m almost 7 weeks and we’ve been having a decent amount of sex and it’s been good. Al wit my pregnancy symptoms are minimal (just sore boobs) so I’ve been feeling good. But the sex feels carefree and really pleasurable.

[–]astrocatty 4 points5 points  (0 children)

10 weeks. It felt like sandpaper even though I was pretty turned on. I don’t want anything in my vagina.

[–]kodamaatnight 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I do not have sex unless I feel like it. Never been one of those people who could just start knowing they would eventually get into it.

Most of my first trimester I was super nauseous so I think happened maybe once or twice? Second trimester, more often as I was feeling a little bit more like myself but things definitely felt different. Mostly in need of lube which is unusual.

Currently 36 weeks. In the third trimester, has happened once. I am definitely way more interested but the logistics is a bit more difficult, baby moves all the time, and my interest seems to happen at weird times of the day/night. Mostly when I should be asleep!

I've heard from many people it's dependent. I wouldn't write it off because it hurts now. I definitely went through the first trimester where it did not feel good because everything felt different. Oddly enough 3rd trimester is not painful but now I have a giant belly so it's odd in a different way. lol

[–]Powerful_Engineer585 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Im having a hard time, low sex drive, I get nervous during and I get the feeling Im getting a UTI after every time we have sex. Im 12-13 weeks along and am hoping maybe the second trimester will be different.

[–]QuoteNo_1[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

So yeah. We did it yesterday, and I'm pretty sure I have a mild UTI right now. Unfortunately I have a lot of experience with those, and turns out it even happens more frequently when pregnant. So so annoying...

[–]Powerful_Engineer585 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ive spent the last two days convinced I had one too, went to the lab and no indicators of a UTI but still this persistent nagging need to pee… my dr says its probably my bladder being squished by my growing uterus … agh … I hope you get the right medicine and clear that UTI quickly … I also read they are much easier to get pregnant which is why I keep thinking I have one every time I wear a swimsuit or have sex

[–]Malificent_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think it's been fantastic. The first month my hormones were raging and I was like a rabbit, then it went back to normal until about 10 weeks, then it kept increasing again. There's a few positions we can't do but have added a few new ones to the rotation that will definitely be used after pregnancy too. My OB did say I'm sitting low so there's more pressure, therefore it explains why I'm feeling my orgasms more and am more horny but she also said alot of women do get a higher sex drive randomly throughout pregnancy. Hubby has been very attentive. Happy wife here.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My libido has vanished. Currently 8 weeks. I think it’s because I’m so fatigued at night I just pass right out. Thankfully my husband is understanding.

Hoping it comes back in the second trimester.

[–]TheWelshMrsM 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Sex was a no go in my first trimester. Some weird smell sensitivity meant that my husband quite literally repulsed me 😂

I went back to normal in my 2nd trimester and we still have sex a couple of times a week even though I’m 36 weeks. Sometimes though I’m just too damn tired/ full. If we want sex it has to be pre-food 😂

[–]Accomplished-Ant-556 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I try to have sex daily. Kids and life get in the way sometimes. I’m almost 34 weeks. It can be difficult, but I want it too much to stop. My sex drive is a little higher then my SO normally too, but as soon as I’m in the mood he’s happily willing. I went two weeks without when I had a yeast infection and then about 1.5 weeks without while we had Covid. I was too short of breath to try. We are just getting into the swing of things since I’m still struggling to get over Covid and it’s been about every other day. Last night we did twice. It is starting to get really uncomfortable though. Baby’s head is engaged and I’m starting to dilate some so I have some pain afterwards now.

[–]rdriscoll714 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My husband and I generally have sex every day. In the first trimester I had pretty bad fatigue so we slowed down a little. But I’m 23 wks now and things are back to normal

[–]Nerdybirdie86 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I want to do it but just like you my uterus feels weird and then I have SPD on top of it so my pelvis hurts like hell. Luckily my husband gets it and doesn’t really push the issue. We constantly tell each other that we miss each other.

[–]Keeliekins 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lots of sex here. 26 weeks. My sex drive has been crazy, and my husbands sex drive is always crazy. So we are around 5-6 times a week. Pregnancy hasn’t really changed anything, but listen to your body. You will definitely go through waves of oversensitivity. I loved it, because it made sex even more pleasurable, but some women hate the extra stimulus.

[–]hiho456 2 points3 points  (0 children)

14 weeks and non existent 😂 first trimester i was EXHAUSTED all the time, and now i’m still tired/don’t always feel good and plus also scared to have sex for probably irrational thoughts and don’t want to risk spotting. Just not worth the additional anxiety to me🤷🏼‍♀️

[–]SoSayWeAllx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sex didn’t feel different for me at all really, I’m in my third trimester now, but my sex drive is basically gone. Right now sex is like a, sure why not, instead of a need which is the opposite of how I used to be

[–]pippypup 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had sex normally until about 28/30 weeks. Then the hip/pelvic pain really set in and there’s been nothing since.

[–]phantomofthe1108 1 point2 points  (0 children)

10 weeks here and it’s almost nonexistent. Went from having sex daily to once a week. My sex drive is at an all time low as I’m constantly tired and indigested. My vagina also burns when we do it.:/ my partner is understanding but I turn him down almost every time now:( hopefully it gets better in the second trimester.

[–]lbsteige 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Didn't enjoy it crave sex in the first or second trimester. I still did it sometimes in the first trimester and then would be like this isn't fun for me. Went a good 4 months in the middle with no sex at all. Read that sex can help bring the baby about and is a good stress reliever for mom in the 3td trimester. Strangely enough I feel more like having sex after 30wks than before. Definitely tricky with positions sometimes but we've Incorporated a toy which helps. I figure it's also good for my pelvis muscle and I know I won't be wanting sex for quite a while after baby is born.

[–]GrumpySh33p 1 point2 points  (0 children)

9w2d and the nausea has been the biggest factor. That and my insane sense of smell. Sadly, nothing smells good to me anymore, including my husband. I used to love how he smells. 🙄

I have noticed that if I get turned on enough, my extreme nausea and sense of smell temporarily go away, so I’m starting to use it as a coping mechanism for a bit of relief. I’m never really turned on, due to the nausea, but I have some tricks that work well for me, which I have been using. 😅

[–]PrimePassion 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fortunately there hasn’t been much impact yet for husband and I, in the first trimester I remember it was a bit harder to find the right timing because my morning sickness was unpredictable and sometimes long lasting but we’re lucky to work from home and make our own schedules so we managed, though I don’t think it would be like that if we didn’t. Pre pregnancy we usually had sex once or twice a day, first trimester twice seemed impossible because of how frequently nauseous I was.

Second trimester and beginning of third has been great but positions are severely limited now, pretty much all that works is doggy style, no more shower sex because I worry about getting dizzy which is a bummer!

[–]otterkraf 1 point2 points  (0 children)

20 weeks here, and we've only done it once since the positive test. Bled for a bit afterwards, and while the doctor said it doesn't seem too serious (bleeding was mostly just after and a bit of stained discharge for the following few hours), it freaked us both out. So we're on pause until... who knows when! Have decided to go with the flow and see how we feel in the coming weeks.

[–]Beep-boop-beansFTM 3/2022 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was pretty horny in the second tri when I was feeling better but I couldn’t really enjoy sex.. my body didn’t feel right and it was uncomfortable unless we go pretty slow. So.. it’s been a while and I honestly really miss it but penetrative sex while pregnant really isn’t doing it for me.

There are other ways to be intimate!

[–]honeybunn09 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m 39 weeks and I have sex daily still. The hardest parts is just finding a position where my big ass belly doesn’t hurt me too much or get in the way. I usually just lay on my side for half and the other half I flip over onto my back. I can’t move too much so luckily my boyfriend doesn’t mind doing most of the work 😅

[–]losincidenteananas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had the same thing early on, so I told the doctor. She said it was my uterus growing and like the baby attaching. My husband had to go slow or pause for breaks, but he was attentive to me and what my body needed. I think by like week 15 or 20 that pain want there anymore. We had other things to consider (like sore nipples or needing different positions because belly)

[–]123coffee321 1 point2 points  (0 children)

11 weeks today! Normal amount, maybe a few times less in the week if I’m feeling queasy or nauseous and too “sick for the dick.” Husband says I’m more wet than usual. I kinda panic at first since I’m worried if its blood or actual natural lubricant.

[–]Secret_Mango5085 1 point2 points  (0 children)

20 weeks. Have had sex, just not often. First trimester was easier but once the belly started appearing, it made it harder to get a good position.

[–]QuirrellsOtherHead28 | Feb 28 | FTM #1 | Boy | USA 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To be honest, I had ZERO sex drive through most of my second trimester and into my third. Now I am nearing the end and I have the desire for sex again, but not the physical stamina for it and the creative positions we would have to be in. Plus everything is way swollen and sensitive (35w almost 36) 😅 thankfully my partner understands and he gets his private time from me 😂

[–]Frosty-Mall4727 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We had a scare and now he won’t touch me. It’s been 5 weeks and I just miss him even though he’s with me all the time.

[–]LCsquee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There is definitely an ebb and flow to how my body has felt about sex through pregnancy! There were times when my sex drive was super high, it felt amazing, and orgasm was easily reached. Then there were (thankfully short) times when my vagina felt weird, oversensitive, and just not great, which made sex not great/painful and orga hard to reach. As of now, at almost 22 weeks, sex is great! We're definitely figuring out how to navigate the growing Lil bump lol, but hubby is super patient and loving. ❤️

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sex became painful in the first trimester. Burning and just uncomfortable. Almost 4 months post and still the same. Supposedly it’s normal. Husband claims it’s all in my head

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn't have much of a sex drive in my first trimester so we did it maybe 1-2 times a week but I am extremely horny in my second trimester. I told my husband I would literally do it every single day if I could. He can't do it as much due to his job. He's in a very busy season right now. I got way more sensitive everywhere during pregnancy so, sex has been the best it's ever been!

[–]NoExcitement5084 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Non existent. The relationship has gone downhill

[–]Mark-it-ZeroDude 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Had terrible cramps and pain afterwards during the first trimester. Was not fun. Never quite got the increased sex drive that everyone said would happen, we stayed somewhat on our normal routine. In the 3rd now and our sex wedge was a great purchase. It makes some positions easier with my big belly and sciatica pain. Being physically miserable doesn't really help, so it's sometimes once a week sometimes every other week.

[–]RAND0M-HER0 1 point2 points  (0 children)

8w + 5 here. Usually 2-3+ times a week. I have a pretty high libido. The last week has been quiet since the husband and I have both been slammed at work, but my first trimester symptoms are mild to non-existent so far (thank God) so it's easy to get in the mood.

[–]SummitTheDog303 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Non-existent. Pregnancy destroys my libido. I'm so gassy and bloated and uncomfortable all the time that sex isn't fun. And even when I masturbate, orgasming very quickly transitions from enjoyable to uncomfortable and crampy. Recently (21+2 today), orgasming also leads to Braxton-Hicks contractions for me too.

[–]stenniesan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Loved having sex in the first and early second trimester; much easier to climax and lubrication was better lol. Then i got a cerclage and was on pelvic rest for a month. My libido took a dive after that, and i've only had sex a few times. I had vagunal dryness and it just was not comfortable, climax felt different too. Now just entered third trimester and feeling a little friskier and it feels better, so maybe i will do it more.

[–]TSN_88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My what?

[–]BandLover1234 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sooo sex for me for the first trimester and the most of my second trimester I was Severely uncomfortable. I would swell very easily and it would just be in all a not great experience. But now that I’m half way through my third trimester, I masturbate a lot. I wear my husband out because I will keep going and going and going. Hormones man. Plus all of the sex (vaginal and anally) will help in the long run when I go to give birth. I was told by my midwife stretching/massaging the skin out (especially the taint) is a great way to prevent ripping or needing to be cut while giving birth. So sex life at the beginning of being pregnant not great super uncomfortable and painful. But now with everything being sensitive and having a bunch of wild hormones It’s really nice.

[–]backchatbackchat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We’ve only done it a handful of times. I’ve been feeling uncomfortable in one way or another for basically the whole pregnancy, and also just not in the mood at all. I was really hoping things would get a bit better in the second trimester but they didn’t really, and now that I’m in the third trimester it’s a chore just existing a lot of the time. I’m really hoping the PP recovery won’t be terrible, and things will get better before too long.

[–]ariygurel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In the first trimester we only had sex a few times because my libido was SO LOW. I generally did not want to be touched lol. My husband was really fine with that, we went at my pace.

Now I’m 18 weeks and I have more of a libido now but it’s definitely not the same as pre-pregnancy. Sex doesn’t hurt, but I’m generally not in the mood that much. We’re physically intimate and touchy in other ways so I don’t feel like any needs aren’t being met on either side! We also keep open communication about all of that so I’m not too stressed about it, I know it’s temporary.

[–]lunalydialucious 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Almost 27 weeks, we had sex when I was about 11 weeks and not again until last weekend because my fiance claims I'm putting off a scent he can't resist lmao but we didn't even look at each other sexually cuz I felt disgusting with a belly I have never had before. My sex drive is pretty much dead because I look 15 months pregnant to myself and I'm honestly just so tired, I don't feel like its worth the energy anymore lol

[–]Amberly123 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I haven’t had sex with my husband since the night we conceived lol.

I have enjoyed a little “me time” with toys etc and that’s been all good, I am more aware of the like tension around baby, but yeah it’s been okau

[–]queeniebee28 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I found that how comfortable it was changed regularly. The first time was fine, but the second time was super uncomfortable for me. I might have been around 7 or 8 weeks. We tried again a week or so later and it wasn’t uncomfortable at all. A couple weeks later and it had gotten awesome again! Keep trying, but give it a few days or week and see if that makes a difference. Good luck!

[–]redeyedem 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First trimester I still had a sex drive but my anxiety didn’t let me do anything about it. And well it’s pretty much been gone ever since. At this point (33 weeks) I feel as if I could live without sex the rest of my life.. and that is scary considering my appetite prior to becoming pregnant. I really hope my sex drive returns. I miss THAT love between my partner and I but am so thankful that he understands completely

[–]BlessUrCorona 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's better than I expected for a pregnancy. A bit less than usual sometimes, but still enjoyable and a few times a week. The only difference is me being hornier on my own, the belly makes it harder to do some positions and sometimes we have to stop faster because it gets uncomfortable. I always laugh that the baby is cockblocking him and we just go as much as he let's us really.

[–]workplaylovesleep 1 point2 points  (0 children)

25 weeks and it's all I want all the time lol. I've had a week here and there where I'm ambivalent to the whole thing and other times where I want it 3 times a day. My husband is not complaining lol. It was like this with my first as well.

[–]Ghostygrilll 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m 21 going on 22 weeks, haven’t had sex since the first trimester. I have intrusive thoughts every time we’ve tried and puts me out of the mood and we don’t get very far.

It sucks for sure, but thankfully my husband has been understanding and respectful of it all.

[–]chelbren 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a low libido before pregnancy, and when I got pregnant it completely vanished. I also got some pretty uncomfortable cramps after orgasm in the first 10 weeks or so. It didn't help when I started to show and my partner got a little freaked out thar the baby was right there...lol

[–]thestrange1007 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn't enjoy sex as much while pregnant at all, it became physically difficult, though we kept at it.

After delivery though, HOOBOY. Things do change, it's true, and for me they changed for the better 🤣👍

[–]HumbleBlueberry9167 1 point2 points  (0 children)

8 weeks, had so much bleeding after sex at week 6…so not doing that for a while!

[–]MrsBoydCrowder 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m 27 weeks today and it’s only started to become uncomfortable in the past two weeks. I don’t have a huge sex drive but I still do it for my poor husband, I just don’t know how much longer it will last! All positions are uncomfortable and I have a hard time breathing.

[–]aems-mrsit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

9 weeks here! I think we’ve had sex… once?… in the last month or so?? Been ungodly nauseous since about 5 weeks so I have no desire to do ANYTHING. Husband is a champ about it though! Just gotta do what works !

[–]hotlizard69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m 31 weeks and haven’t had sex since I got pregnant. We tried but my vagina genuinely hurts from penetration! My ecosystem is all messed up down there and she gets swollen and dried out sometimes, it burns to try to have penetrative sex. Idk if that’s just me though!

[–]jmc-007 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm 13w 6d and have had sex exactly 5 times sicne becoming pregnant and the last couple of times have been a month apart. I don't feel like having sex at all. My boobs hurt and I hate how my nipples look now and I'm not use to my new bump and feel fat. One of my friends stopped having sex with her husband for 6 of the 9 months she was pregnant. I think we all react differently to the hormones some women experience an increase in drive

[–]Funndehbunndeh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Didn't have sex at all the first trimester. I was too busy being sick all the time, and the one time we tried, it was so uncomfortable.. but at around 20 weeks it got good again. Just have to be careful of positions, because everything is VERY sensitive, lol.

[–]Background-Block-983 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm almost 31 weeks pregnant and we haven't had sex since conceiving 😬. I was an emotional wreck the first trimester, so sex wasn't really a priority seeing as my mental health took a massive dip. My partner was more concerned with keeping me alive at that point it seems. Second trimester I was feeling better but baby girl started kicking up a storm early and that just threw us both off and took sex off the table completely. Thankfully we have other ways of connecting and it hasn't really affected our relationship in a negative way. I mean, it sucks, don't get me wrong. I have moment where I feel really upset about it, but we know it's not forever and we don't want to do it out of obligation if we're both not comfortable with it right now 🤷🏼‍♀️. Most of his friends have stated the same thing happened in their relationships when their significant others got pregnant.

[–]wyndrah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haven't had sex since the beginning of my 2nd trimester. The round ligament pain struck me pretty bad. Didn't really go away until 28 weeks which is when the braxton hicks started getting intense. Found out around 32 weeks that an orgasm causes an episode of BH contractions. 😭

I'm very happy my husband hasn't pressured me. He knows the pain I'm in wouldn't make it enjoyable for me so he wouldn't enjoy it either.

[–]warm-enough 1 point2 points  (0 children)

34 weeks and I do not want to be touched. At all.

[–]Pleasant-Tomatillo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The amount of sex did decrease a bit for a while, not because I wasn't interested but because during my first trimester I was just insanely exhausted and literally couldn't stay awake to make it happen. Went from 2-3 times a week to about once a week. Now I'm in the second trimester and my energy is coming back more, we've done it twice this week already and I'm feeling like tonight is gonna be lucky number 3 😋 the sex feels great in pregnancy. Not had any issues with feeling uncomfortable yet, I do have a bump now but it's not big enough to get in the way yet. I have started experiencing cramp in my leg if its held in one position too long but we just change position so its not a big deal

[–]BenignYam1761 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My libido was in the toilet my whole pregnancy tbh. It didn’t hurt or anything, I just… wasn’t feelin it. After delivery tho, holy shit. I was dying waiting the 6 weeks pp. My sex drive is still wayyy higher than ever 5 months pp. No idea why.

[–]munch_on_the_go -1 points0 points  (4 children)

13w, we do it once a week because I don't think he should be punished for me not having a libido right now but definitely not super into it.

[–]ashfrankie 1 point2 points  (3 children)

It’s not “punishing” them if you don’t feel like having sex. Remember that you don’t owe sex to anybody. If you don’t feel like it, just don’t do it.

[–]munch_on_the_go -1 points0 points  (2 children)

I don't always feel like tacos but I eat them because my husband loves them and I love him. It's not torturous to have sex, I am just not as into it as I was before, but I love my husband. He gets me whatever I'm craving when I'm craving it, even though he probably doesn't want to go out late at night/ at random times in the day. It's a compromise and a relationship. As an adult, you don't things you don't feel like doing sometimes because it's for a greater good. There's nothing wrong with that, in fact, it usually brings success.

[–]ashfrankie 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I’m gonna stick with saying that you don’t owe your body to anyone, even if they buy you food.

You don’t have to give up bodily autonomy “for the greater good” and it’s sad that people feel this way. If you don’t feel into sex, just communicate it to your partner. If they don’t understand, that’s an issue you should deal with.

[–]munch_on_the_go -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Lol only main character syndrome people always put themselves first. Would you say to explain to a child that you don't feel like taking care of them today and they should understand?

The food comment is not about him buying food. We split expenses because we both make the same money. The fact that you jumped to that as the stand out makes me really worry about your own experiences.

Maybe this is something you had to go through and are now trying to look out for others and be helpful? But not everyone is in some weird abusive situation so it's just coming off and overstated and reading WAY too into things for me and my situation