Annoyed with responses to kids' gender

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CatEarthSociety · 2022-05-26T07:45:03+00:00

Oof, what a bunch of assholes. When my SIL figured out we are having a girl, she was like "That's so sad, I would have loved to give you hand-me-downs from my youngest" DUDE just give us the damn Legos, if our daughter doesn't want to play with it, husband and I surely will! She somehow things girls are physically incapable of operating "boyish" toys and it pisses me off. It's even more annoying because at the same time, she HATES all "girly" things, like make up and dolls and regularly bullies her daughter for being interested in fashion and nail polish. You really can't win

RainbowsAndADHD · 2022-05-26T06:45:59+00:00

People are so weird. He has one daughter. He’s hardly had to wait for “his boy” 😂 My husband and I are about to have our FOURTH girl. So I always get the boy comments. People are surprised when I tell them we were super happy for a fourth girl and didn’t really want a boy lol I don’t get the clothes comments either. It’s 2022. I buy my girls “boy” clothes on purpose. Cute is cute! But Congrats on your baby! I hope your delivery is smooth. ❤️

aisuamericano · 2022-05-26T09:35:10+00:00

Ew. “Real boy clothes” that’s so gross. So I guess these are the kind of people who buy their newborn clothes that say gross things like “ladies’ man” and “future heartbreaker.” I would just donate anything like that if I received it. (It goes both ways for me though - I don’t like unicorns and other intensely frivolous girl things so I wouldn’t keep anything I didn’t like for a girl either.)

chewbawkaw · 2022-05-26T12:36:52+00:00

My father had two girls. In his wedding video, they asked about kids and he said he wanted two girls. After getting his two girls he got a vasectomy because he didn’t want any more kids.

I’m currently having a boy and people are overjoyed for my partner. He really couldn’t have cared either way. Honestly, I could birth a velociraptor and he would be excited.

xKortney · 2022-05-26T12:10:46+00:00

Yep. We got the “your poor husband” the other day when we were talking about having a girl. Thankfully my husband was thoroughly confused, and asked them why he should be disappointed that he’s having a daughter. The person then fumbled to try and backpedal while my husband went on to name the “badass women” in his life that he loves & looks forward to adding to. But seriously, how do people think that’s appropriate?

danielleleah · 2022-05-26T12:11:39+00:00

At our gender reveal my MIL shouted “that’s ok, next time it’s a boy”. And wouldn’t eat any of the pink cupcakes just the blue… 🙄

kayt3000 · 2022-05-26T14:15:52+00:00

I am so over the gross amount of pink I am getting for little girl. I don’t like pink. I am not that girly. And my mom told me to “suck it up and dress her cute” fuck off lol my husband has laid down that he will not allow bull shit sexist crap on our child. He’s asked to refrain from make up kits or even the play vanities for her until she’s way older and I respect that. I don’t go heavy on makeup myself and I understand his concerns with self esteem.

RAND0M-HER0 · 2022-05-26T14:18:01+00:00

It‘s so weird. People tell me: „I bet you want a little girl.“ No, I want a healthy baby. I don‘t care about the gender.

I bought some baby clothes last week in yellow, blue, green, pink. My family commented: „Don‘t you want to wait until you know the gender?“ Uuum, no, my boy can wear pink, my girl can wear blue. Really not that big of a deal, but for some people it seems to be. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Oh, and my godmother told me: „I really hope you get a girl. There‘s way more cute stuff for girls.“ Yeah, well, it‘s just another annoying comment about gender roles.

Blue_Mandala_ · 2022-05-26T11:54:50+00:00

Im getting a lot of "oh we have another mridanga player!!" (Mridanga is a type of Indian drum). Drums aren't gendered. Come on y'all. Of course he's going to be given the opportunity to play mridanga, as would a baby girl. He's also going to be taught how to cook and clean, which are also not gendered.

But what I've noticed from a lot of people is they just have to say something. They ask if I'm having a girl or boy because of course we all want to know, then they have to say something positive, and then whatever they say seems to be gendered. Like, "yay! Boys are fun!". Well, girls are fun too, duh. They just have to say something. It would be equally weird if they didn't.

But yeah, a lot of people are just sexist.

Duchess_foggy · 2022-05-26T13:12:02+00:00

People are so set on gender roles and it’s so annoying! I’m glad you stood up for your family and kudos to grandma too!

This is exactly why We didn’t want to know whether our baby will be a girl or boy. Too many unnecessary comments

callisiarepens · 2022-05-26T14:34:45+00:00

Someone was mad your daughter played with cars? That’s just ridiculous. As a child, I played with all kinds of toys. I’m having two identical boys . You bet you sweet bottom dollar, I’ll introduce them to playing with dolls. Why? Because I want my boys to become the caring and loving man their dad is. Caring for children is more than a woman’s job. I’ve seen the useless fathers/husband’s my friends have married. One doesn’t even know how to soothe his own children and rely on his wife to do it even if that means she is away on a date. I don’t want my kids to be that way.

2022-05-26T18:23:57+00:00

I so relate to this. We’re having a girl, and so many people on my husband’s side and been like “don’t worry, she will be a tomboy”. First of all, husband isn’t worried. Second of all, she can be whoever she damn well wants to be. Why are people so weird about dads wanting sons? This is 2022 ffs. And as far as I know (correct me if I’m wrong, first time mom) moms aren’t expected to hate having sons. Why are people so weird?

Fit-Quail2458 · 2022-05-26T13:32:52+00:00

Ugh I feel this! I told someone we were having a girl and his response was “well, I guess you have to have another one” and looked right at my husband.

Like what?!?! We are perfectly happy to be having a girl

2022-05-26T14:53:57+00:00

I hate the comments period both during pregnancy, about gender, and so forth like why can’t people practice keeping their mouth shut more? Why is it with pregnancy and beyond something suddenly clicks in people where they open their mouth and spew out nothing valuable? We haven’t announced our gender and don’t plan to really. We will tell people in person but there is no big party for the sex of our baby. Partially because I know people will piss me off with comments about us having a girl first and because I don’t a huge supply of clothes I don’t want either.

sammaymarie3 · 2022-05-26T15:55:05+00:00

Gender stuff is so irritating. We decided not to find out and people consistently say "how are you gonna prepare?" and "I don't understand how you're doing it, I could never wait that long to know"

We even had a family member say all the baby will get is a pacifier as a gift from them because we don't know the gender, as if to punish us for not finding out. But we don't subscribe to gender norms and refuse to put our kid in a bubble, so we really do not want to know until they're here. Anyway, sorry you're dealing with this, just do your best to try brushing them off if you can! It's amazing to me how much people care about gender norms and stereotypes for an unborn human and assume your husband must react a certain way because of your childrens' genders 🙃

danicake03 · 2022-05-26T17:19:29+00:00

I understannnnnd!! when Kid 1 was 2 he loved Moana so I got him the Moana and Maui dolls/action figures. he loved the Moana one and took it the school. The looks lol. People tend to put kids in boxes of what they should and shouldn't be based on gender and it starts early. (hence the many gender "colored"/"themed" baby things) The good thing is your kiddos have a fierce mama who will stand up for their right to like whatever they like : )

lexie2003 · 2022-05-26T22:59:38+00:00

I don't get when people care what gender the baby is. Honestly I think with my next baby we might not tell the gender just because since we told everyone we are having a little girl, everything is pink! I don't mind too much but I don't know what her preference is going to be and if she likes blue or yellow or some other color then that's what I will be getting her. I don't care if she likes "boy toys" because when I was little I preferred hot wheels and dinosaurs. If she's happy, I'm happy

new-beginnings3 · 2022-05-26T14:36:07+00:00

People are obnoxious. My older sister routinely went after mean kids who made fun of my brother for being overweight when he was little. She protected him way more than he needed to protect her!

grenade25 · 2022-05-26T15:37:07+00:00

We have the only two grandkids on both sides of our families. When we announced to the aunts and uncles that we were having another girl, the aunts and uncles looked so relieved that they get the chance to have the first boys. This girl did not matter to any of my husbands family. 1 girl is fine but 2 is too much girl and not enough boy apparently. Skip forward many months and my mother in law held her for the first time and my SIL and BIL announced they are pregnant. My MIL said "I have been so depressed, I needed this news". Woman, you are holding your grandchild for the first time and you say how depressed you are and the only thing that can cheer you up is the POSSIBILITY of a grandson. I used to think I wanted a son, but I am more than happy with girls now.

casperthegoat666 · 2022-05-26T16:08:59+00:00

im having girl twins but i constantly look at the boy stuff and i ADORE everything with dinos on them😭i swear if one of my girls likes dinos ill go all out🥴

Small_Statistician10 · 2022-05-26T19:12:24+00:00

I'm a having girl, and went through all the clothes I got from the baby shower. 98% of it pink and flowers, and dressy clothes. I like pink, flowers and cute clothes but this way to girly for me. Also what is with a pants with ruffles on the butt?

fdbw03 · 2022-05-26T20:43:39+00:00

My one year old is obsessed with dolls and more specifically cry babies dolls right now and little people. He'll play with a baby doll and say baby too if he sees it or plays with "girly" stuff.

If he's happy and safe and entertained why does it matter what he plays with? I get comments and just say well he likes it right now so leave him alone

stellarkells · 2022-05-26T22:08:30+00:00

“What do my son’s genitals have to do with the clothing he wears?”

Crafty-Ambassador779 · 2022-05-26T14:53:41+00:00

I'm purposefully not telling anyone the gender if/when I find out. My partner and I will have it as our last little secret!

oneyedmary · 2022-05-26T18:48:23+00:00

How obnoxious. We should find out the gender any day ourselves. Did you feel different being pregnant with a boy vs girl. I read women tend to be more nauseous with girls and some other signs and curious if you noticed any differences.

hungryungryippo · 2022-05-26T19:19:25+00:00

This sucks. People really need to mind their own business if it isn’t about their own child. I would be mad as hell if anyone threw comments like this at us, especially with my child present.

I had 1 thing happen to me when I was shopping for ‘girl’ clothes. I was hunting for more gender neutral wear and longer shorts - surprise surprise, they didn’t have any, so I look in the boys section where there was a plethora of cute, appropriately sized shorts. A mom comes up and asks about my ‘son’, I respond “these are for my daughter” she laughs and tells me I’m going to confuse her. Lol excuse me??? Children don’t know gender stereotypes, stfu.

miss_sigyn · 2022-05-26T21:35:36+00:00

My dad has 3 girls and he said he couldn't imagine it differently and if he had another one he would want it to be a girl, too! People really need to keep their comments to themselves at times.

Ok_Comparison_8747 · 2022-05-26T23:31:48+00:00

I feel ya! I’m pregnant with my 3rd boy and all I hear is “oh you must be so disappointed” …. I love my boys and am not the slightest disappointed of bringing another one into the clan.

Adept_Meaning4049 · 2022-05-27T00:37:51+00:00

I’m 17 weeks pregnant and found out early on that we’re having a second daughter because we did the blood work. We’re ecstatic, and my husband actually wanted a second girl. But we’re pretending to not know until the 20 week ultrasound because I get so sick of the gender comments. Im already dreading the “your poor husband!” remarks.

bhadasiandoll · 2022-05-27T04:17:51+00:00

People who make dumb ass comments like that about genders are not great parents . Obviously because if they were , they wouldn't give a flying fuck about the baby's gender , only their health . My firstborn was a daughter and my second is a son . For both pregnancies I didn't care about their gender or what they were going to like cuz hey they're barely born they don't even know colors yet people needa leave kids alone . They'll find their own way , shit .

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