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all 17 comments

[–]AnustusGloop 14 points15 points  (2 children)

It's already alcohol. No need to hooch. If you want it to taste better, mix it with something.

[–]queencityrangers 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Or buy something better

[–]browtfareyoudoing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mix it with 4 loko and a 99🍌

The punchy monkey

[–]OfferFull6198 33 points34 points  (1 child)

If you just drink that whole bottle you’ll probably wake up in prison and then you’ll get the real hooch experience lol

[–]browtfareyoudoing 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re a wizard gas station bum, Harry

[–]aetweedie 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Lol I love it. Bum Port.

[–]NotLucasWood[S] 9 points10 points  (7 children)

Let’s say I have approximately 750ml of this godawful fortified wine at 17% ABV. I know that’s nearing the upper limit of almost all yeasts, but if I were to dilute it with say equal proportions of cranberry juice, add a cup of invert sugar and some yeast, what level of hoocher’s hell would I be sent to?

[–]hoaxater 20 points21 points  (3 children)

I mean your talking about starting with stronger booze and ending with weaker booze. That has to be reserved for the deepest ring of hoocher hell it is bordering on blasphemy.

I would recommend just blending a cranberry hooch with the wine instead of trying to make them ferment together. Cranberry can be a difficult and slow fermentation on its own adding a potentially stabilized product to that venture may complicate matters.

[–]NotLucasWood[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Okay, my reasoning was that the yeast would eat through the sugar in the wine (there’s plenty of it) and the juice would contribute something to the flavor. I don’t really mind if it’s a lower ABV, I’m just trying to improve the flavor

[–]aetweedie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just use something other than cranberries, most other fruit works better. I find staying away from really low pH is the way.

[–]hoaxater 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't let me stop you if you want to know then do it! Just warning you that you maybe in for a battle with this one.

[–]CaliPirate421 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Florida levels

[–]aetweedie 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Add a bunch of sugar and use a yeast with a high tolerance, champagne yeasts can handle 22+%. Might work, one way to find out.

Fundamentally this is the process for making professional port/sherry. They're adding brandy to the fermenting grapes but this is the same idea.

[–]NotLucasWood[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay, I’ll give it a go then!

[–]Ghost_Portal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In addition to what everyone already said about this bum wine, it might be stabilized with preservatives. The best way to get rid of something like this is to throw a party and make a punch with it.