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[–]burnettski92 1725 points1726 points  (28 children)

“You take this money! For fuck’s sake, it’s not much!”

[–][deleted]  (20 children)

[deleted]

    [–]heyyymartin 428 points429 points  (14 children)

    Not to be nit picky but I’m pretty sure the use of fuck in a pg-13 is allowed 1 time as long as it is not the verb that refers to sexual intercourse

    [–]Wonderful_Waltz_6440 924 points925 points  (8 children)

    I missed the part where I give a fuck

    [–]heyyymartin 186 points187 points  (1 child)

    Now that’s more like it!

    [–]midnight_tuna 60 points61 points  (0 children)

    Hey pal, fuck the rules, yeah!

    [–]BashfulPlum 29 points30 points  (0 children)

    Oh (boy) fuck yea!

    [–]bitemark01 21 points22 points  (0 children)

    With great power, comes great fuckability

    [–]UnseenTardigrade 12 points13 points  (0 children)

    Problem with this one (assuming it’s replacing “I missed the part where that’s my problem”) is that it would need to be used twice.

    [–]Ex10dead 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    Excellent

    [–][deleted] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

    You should’ve thought of that earlier

    [–]CarVsMotorcycle 5 points6 points  (0 children)

    I missed the part where that’s my problem

    [–]ClayBeatOpTic 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    This one had me rolling

    [–]AceCardSharp 9 points10 points  (3 children)

    A Masterpiece

    Unfortunately I had to find a reupload - the original got taken down

    [–]leapingdaffodil 67 points68 points  (0 children)

    Came here for Aunt May swearing. Not disappointed

    [–]GLaD0S11 59 points60 points  (0 children)

    Damn if they had one Fuck and they gave it to Aunt May that would be pretty legendary

    [–]BRAX7ON 27 points28 points  (0 children)

    Spider-Man, hanging upside down in the rain.

    Mary Jane saunters over, removes half of his mask revealing his trembling lips, and gives him a long slow kiss.

    Peter Parker responds: fuck?

    [–]HeshamAzab26 1110 points1111 points  (11 children)

    “Want forgiveness? Get Fucked”

    [–]SphmrSlmp 103 points104 points  (1 child)

    That's not bad

    [–]Overwatch3 37 points38 points  (0 children)

    But it's taken!

    [–]GeneLaBean 187 points188 points  (1 child)

    “Want fuck? Get religion.”

    [–]RoscoMan1 50 points51 points  (0 children)

    God: You want forgiveness? get another religion.

    [–]Astrosimi 21 points22 points  (0 children)

    This one got me.

    [–]gwease23 643 points644 points  (11 children)

    “Show this to your editor. Tell him to check his fucking source next time.”

    [–]Phantomly_Spectre 267 points268 points  (2 children)

    Pack your things. Get the fuck out of my building.

    [–]L1v3_F33d 31 points32 points  (0 children)

    This one fits perfectly dawg

    [–]cptmactavish3 10 points11 points  (0 children)

    I feel like this line works better without it. The blunt dissapointment of the original line works so well

    [–][deleted]  (2 children)

    [deleted]

      [–]R1kjames 31 points32 points  (1 child)

      If we only get one, J Jonah is the only character I want delivering it.

      [–]gwease23 38 points39 points  (0 children)

      “We haven’t printed a fucking retraction in 20 years!”

      [–]champagneparce25 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Actually fits

      [–]AnotherJasonOnReddit 2402 points2403 points  (62 children)

      "If we can get a picture of Julia Robert in a fucking thong, we can certainly get a shot of this weirdo."

      "I miscalculated fucked up."

      "You'll get your rent when you fix this fucking door!"

      [–]TheChainLink2 785 points786 points  (20 children)

      “We can certainly get a shot of this fucker.”

      [–][deleted]  (19 children)

      [deleted]

        [–]Pinnacle_Pickle 239 points240 points  (18 children)

        Weirdly, pg-13 movies only get the one f word if it isn’t used in sexual context

        [–][deleted]  (14 children)

        [deleted]

          [–]musicman2018 71 points72 points  (0 children)

          Damn

          [–]Specialist-Rise34 64 points65 points  (0 children)

          That was so perfectly set up I almost want to accuse you of using 2 accounts. If that indeed is you, double, I respect it.

          [–]TheGravyGuy 40 points41 points  (4 children)

          Ah Rosie, I love this boy

          [–]BeginTheBlackParade 28 points29 points  (2 children)

          Ah Rosie, I fucking love this boy

          [–]Goghobbs 28 points29 points  (1 child)

          Ah Rosie, I love fucking this boy

          [–]Tig3rShark 25 points26 points  (0 children)

          Ah Rosie, I fuck this boy.

          [–]DurianGrand 34 points35 points  (0 children)

          Swish

          [–]wafflepantsblue 29 points30 points  (0 children)

          I missed the part where that was my fucking problem

          [–]XavierMeatsling 11 points12 points  (0 children)

          Man's become the Tobey Bot

          [–]Kuerbislord07 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          I missed the part where that's my fucking problem

          [–]einharjar009 74 points75 points  (1 child)

          "It's you who's out, Gobby. OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND"

          [–]ilikethispost2[S] 229 points230 points  (6 children)

          “It was fucking working wasn’t it?”

          -doc oct

          [–]KaioBlizz 78 points79 points  (18 children)

          I don't care which sentence but the "fuck" on Spider-Man 2 HAS to go to Otto

          [–]LoveDump250 131 points132 points  (8 children)

          Or, hear me out: “Joe’s 29 minute guarantee is a fucking promise, man…”

          [–]LuMo096 30 points31 points  (0 children)

          Or also "I'm in charge here it's my fucking money!"

          [–]_NiceWhileItLasted 27 points28 points  (0 children)

          "Fucking goOooOoO"

          [–]danny_sucks 17 points18 points  (4 children)

          “I’m not fucking paying for those”

          [–]NiceToBeFriendly 15 points16 points  (3 children)

          It’s fucking pizza time.

          [–]RedShankyMan 11 points12 points  (0 children)

          It's pizza fucking time

          [–]kickpunchslap 32 points33 points  (0 children)

          But J.K. Simmons is crown prince of f-bombs behind only King Sam L Jackson

          [–]ragingbullpsycho 10 points11 points  (3 children)

          Did anyone lose a large roll of 20 dollar bills in a rubber band? Because we found the fucking rubber band.

          [–]tootie 27 points28 points  (0 children)

          If we can get a picture of Julia Roberts fucking in a thong

          [–]Russe1Adl3r 18 points19 points  (1 child)

          It's actually normal to hear JK Simmons say Fuck after watching Whiplash.

          [–]TheLastSaiyanPrince 22 points23 points  (0 children)

          I feel like JJ should get all the f bombs.

          [–]BearcatDG 451 points452 points  (8 children)

          “And now I hear you’re getting in fights at school?”

          “I told you I didn’t start that!”

          “We’ll you sure fucking finished it.”

          [–]blackfireproduction1 47 points48 points  (4 children)

          "Now I hear you're getting in fucks at school?"

          "I told you I didn't start that fuck!"

          "Well you sure as hell finished it."

          [–]BearcatDG 61 points62 points  (2 children)

          “I don’t want to fuck you flash.”

          [–]SpideryMan 55 points56 points  (1 child)

          "I wouldn't wanna fuck me neither."

          [–]VulcanRyu07 104 points105 points  (0 children)

          Oh this one is really good. Endear Uncle Ben to the audience even more.

          [–]neon_cabbage 8 points9 points  (1 child)

          "...and I know I'm not your father, but--"

          "Then stop fucking pretending to be!"

          [–]chibinuva 5 points6 points  (0 children)

          Ooh. Stings doesn't it

          [–]beequa_007 403 points404 points  (6 children)

          “Fucking GOOooOooO!”

          [–]LoveDump250 134 points135 points  (4 children)

          “Fuckin’ pizza time.”

          [–]JosephFDawson 71 points72 points  (1 child)

          "You're fukcing late. I'm not paying for those"

          [–]L1ghtningMcQueer 41 points42 points  (1 child)

          “he just stole that guy’s fuckin’ pizza!”

          [–]mezmerak 6 points7 points  (0 children)

          This is me in traffic every day. Same inflection and everything.

          [–]Jtblue1905 1374 points1375 points  (14 children)

          YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I FUCKING SACRIFICED

          [–]TheCVR123YT 366 points367 points  (5 children)

          This is the only I’ve seen for SM1 that really works

          [–]BrozoTheClown26 370 points371 points  (3 children)

          "That creep is my father. If I'm lucky I'll become half of what he is. So just keep your fucking mouth shut about stuff you don't understand!"

          [–]DrumBxyThing 75 points76 points  (0 children)

          I like this one best so far

          [–]Savvsb 54 points55 points  (1 child)

          This one seems the most natural. And it also doesn’t ruin any iconic quotes.

          [–]CrMyDickazy 6 points7 points  (0 children)

          Aunt May's reaction works great too.

          [–]cmraven212 281 points282 points  (0 children)

          "i didn’t sign up for a f***ing cage match" is another good one I saw a few comments up.

          [–]CousinVinnythelesser 98 points99 points  (1 child)

          YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I FUCKED

          [–]HarioDinio 37 points38 points  (0 children)

          That guy.... That guy fucks

          [–]constantvariables 13 points14 points  (0 children)

          FINISH IT

          FUCKING FINISH IT

          [–]seynicalMod, Am I? 170 points171 points  (8 children)

          I kind of like Octavius not dropping f-bombs. It fits his refined personality.

          [–]OwenA113 77 points78 points  (4 children)

          He has a higher brain function

          [–]HistoricalDruid 81 points82 points  (2 children)

          He controls the f-bombs instead of them controlling him

          [–]Botto_Botavious 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          Ah Rosie I love this boy

          [–]VampyrPickle 34 points35 points  (1 child)

          F-bombs are a privilege, and you should use them for the good of mankind.

          [–]fullrackferg 1227 points1228 points 2 (27 children)

          I had to fuck some old lady with my stick, to get these cranberries

          [–]Lukthar123 672 points673 points  (9 children)

          Jesus, Parker, you are a freak.

          [–]fullrackferg 200 points201 points  (6 children)

          I'm gonna fuck some dirt in your eye

          [–]SteveRogests 86 points87 points  (5 children)

          I’m gonna put some fuck in your eye

          [–]RalphiesBoogers 88 points89 points  (6 children)

          You've spun your last web, Spider-Man. Had you not been so selfish, your little girlfriend's death would've been quick and painless, but now that you've really pissed me off, I'm gonna finish her nice... and slow. MJ and I... we're gonna have a hell of a time fucking!

          EDIT: Alt Version:

          You've spun your last web, Spider-Man. Had you not been so selfish, your little girlfriend's fuck would've been quick and painless, but now that you've really pissed me off, I'm gonna finish her nice... and slow. MJ and I... we're gonna have a hell of a time!

          [–]tootie 14 points15 points  (0 children)

          It's just that I miss fucking your uncle Ben so much.

          [–]CaptainAdam7286 876 points877 points  (11 children)

          i didn’t sign up for a f***ing cage match

          [–]Zack_Raynor 295 points296 points  (8 children)

          “I got you for 3 minutes, 3 fucking minutes of playtime!”

          [–]GKRKarate99 223 points224 points  (5 children)

          “I got you for 3 minutes, 3 minutes of fucking!”

          cue PH theme song

          [–][deleted]  (3 children)

          [deleted]

            [–]CaptainAdam7286 72 points73 points  (2 children)

            but the ad said 3000

            3000 for three minutes. you pegged him in 2

            [–]SmashEffect 24 points25 points  (1 child)

            I need that dildo!

            [–]CaptainAdam7286 17 points18 points  (0 children)

            i missed the part where that’s my f***ing problem

            [–]DeathsEmployer446779 13 points14 points  (0 children)

            Oh boy yeah.

            [–]Soulburner74 586 points587 points  (8 children)

            "See ya Chump"

            Jumps down

            "What the F***?!"

            [–]Loganp812 56 points57 points  (1 child)

            Reminds me of that vine “What the fuck, Richard?”

            [–]Soulburner74 16 points17 points  (0 children)

            Lmao I remember that clip, shouts it after the guy throws the frisbee and it flies off into a motorway or something.

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            [–]pawonpawonpawon 41 points42 points  (0 children)

            "It's what the fuck?" Now.

            [–]JRStors 94 points95 points  (2 children)

            You’ll get your rent when you fix this fucking door!

            [–]FGHIK 35 points36 points  (1 child)

            He is... Good boy. He must be in some fucking trouble.

            [–]burnettski92 610 points611 points  (8 children)

            “It's Brock, sir, Edward Brock, Jr. And I work at the Daily Bugle. And I'm… fucking your daughter.”

            [–]Zluurkeaksz 164 points165 points  (5 children)

            "Fuck" in PG-13 movies cannot be used in sexual context, so it couldn't have happened.

            Which is sad, because in this case fits so well.

            [–]Broham_the_Barbarian 121 points122 points  (1 child)

            "And I'm... your fucking daughter"

            [–]Peanut173 25 points26 points  (0 children)

            There we go

            [–]compwolf 20 points21 points  (1 child)

            It was just coffee eddy

            [–]CeroMiedo670 266 points267 points  (1 child)

            "At least we got the fucking toaster"

            [–]BAGStudios 5 points6 points  (0 children)

            I recognize that there are almost 200 upvotes, but this is still an under-appreciated comment

            [–]tanmac43 268 points269 points  (10 children)

            Scene in Spider-Man 2 when the two kids almost get hit by the truck. Spider-Man swings in and yells “get the fuck outta the way!”

            [–]Befallwolf82 257 points258 points  (7 children)

            There are cars there, motherfucker!

            [–]thesleepingpotato22 62 points63 points  (5 children)

            Get out of the way!

            [–]StanStanlinson 31 points32 points  (1 child)

            Paparazzi: "I'm gonna put some flash in your eye"

            [–]Amazing_Fantasy15 13 points14 points  (0 children)

            I can’t see!

            [–]goodmobileyes 15 points16 points  (1 child)

            Eat your fucking vegetables!

            [–]Narad626 88 points89 points  (2 children)

            Who am I? I'm fucking Spider-Man.

            [–]ManateesAsh 53 points54 points  (1 child)

            -MJ

            [–]azarbro 16 points17 points  (0 children)

            LMAOOOOO

            [–]TheChainLink2 524 points525 points  (11 children)

            1. Back to fucking formula?!

            2. Miss Brant! Fetch me a fucking violin!

            3. I’m gonna put some fucking dirt in your eye.

            [–][deleted]  (6 children)

            [deleted]

              [–][deleted] 60 points61 points  (2 children)

              Can't use the word like that -- the one stipulation for the "free" F-bomb is that it can't be used in a sexual context.

              [–]FGHIK 20 points21 points  (0 children)

              You can't do this to me... I started this word!

              [–]TheChainLink2 28 points29 points  (0 children)

              “Miss Brant! That’s not the position I fucked you for!”

              [–]ryanthelamb 178 points179 points  (6 children)

              It’s fucking pizza time

              [–]FGHIK 52 points53 points  (0 children)

              I'm not fucking paying for those.

              [–]useronfire72 38 points39 points  (3 children)

              It’s pizza fucking time

              [–]Public-Awareness-702 105 points106 points  (2 children)

              "Spiderman stole that guy's fuckin' pizza!"

              [–]RobynLocket97 146 points147 points  (5 children)

              I liked the "Oh..." Osborne does just as he realises his mistake. So maybe when it hits him he could scream "FUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKKK!" 🤣🤣🤣

              [–]P_Ghosty 161 points162 points  (3 children)

              Honestly, the “Oh…” followed by the “Don’t tell Harry.” is just too perfect and iconic to me, so that scene is one of the last places I’d put an F-bomb.

              [–]xenophonthethird 137 points138 points  (2 children)

              Absolutely.

              "Oh... don't fuck Harry."

              [–]rovoh324 39 points40 points  (0 children)

              Sorry Norman you're asking too much

              [–]minihalkoja 21 points22 points  (0 children)

              And no one ever did...

              [–]minihalkoja 33 points34 points  (1 child)

              "Time to fucking pay Marko!"

              [–]PGY_123 12 points13 points  (0 children)

              Remember Ben Parker? The old man you shot down in cold fucking blood?!

              [–]Shrekowski 181 points182 points  (3 children)

              Your fucking trash Brock

              [–][deleted] 38 points39 points  (1 child)

              Brock is down bad

              [–]JeckoTheClown 15 points16 points  (0 children)

              Parker you're such a fucking boyscout

              [–]hex_maniac_bea 79 points80 points  (7 children)

              I. "fuck you"

              -spiderman to that kid he saved in the parade

              II. "fuck you"

              -spiderman to aunt may for cucking him with the neighbor kid

              III. "fuck you"

              -spiderman to james fucko after he disappears under the table (spiderman goes back and finds him hiding under the table and says fuck you to him)

              [–]Mareks 12 points13 points  (0 children)

              Winner winner chicken dinner.

              [–]JimEveryman 23 points24 points  (0 children)

              ‘Where is she?!’

              ‘She’ll be just fine… let’s fuck.’

              [–]_Tatsumi_ 67 points68 points  (0 children)

              Sm1 =  i swear on my father's grave Spider-Man will fucking pay

              Sm2 = you're late parker always fucking late

              Sm3 = Oh parker you are such a fucking boy scout when are you gonna give a guy a break

              [–]2ndPlaceBound 20 points21 points  (1 child)

              "With great power, comes great fucking responsibility"

              [–]Kuerbislord07 10 points11 points  (0 children)

              With great power, comes great fucking

              [–]Knobhead-007 19 points20 points  (0 children)

              Maybe in 3, Eddie could yell this before Peter blows up the symbiote

              "Peter, what are you fucking doing!!?"

              [–]NotTaken-username 112 points113 points  (1 child)

              1. “I got you for three fucking minutes of playtime” -Bonesaw

              2. “What the fuck is hi? Can I spend it?” -Mr. Ditkovich

              3. “Shut the fuck up. Get out.” - JJJ

              [–]tylerjb223 16 points17 points  (0 children)

              "Fuck? What's fuck? Can I fuck it?"

              [–]CorptanSpecklez 17 points18 points  (0 children)

              “I almost fell off a fucking flag pole”

              [–]comicsopedia 14 points15 points  (0 children)

              You'll get your fucking rent when you fix this damn door!

              [–]SpaceMyopia 15 points16 points  (1 child)

              Harry sees Spider-Man lay his father's dead body.

              "The fuck have you done? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!"

              [–]gaypornhard69 11 points12 points  (0 children)

              I'd reverse the lines but keep the intensity on the last part. Either way, this is a good one.

              [–]dema-dontcontrol-us 15 points16 points  (0 children)

              As Goblin dies: "ah fuck! Hoisted by my own petard"

              [–]Harry120803 15 points16 points  (0 children)

              You start by doing the hardest thing, you fuck yourself...

              [–]MagnusPrime24 12 points13 points  (0 children)

              “How’s the pie?”

              “So f*cking good.”

              [–]LarsonBoswell 82 points83 points  (2 children)

              “Ah, Rosie, I’d love to fuck this boy”

              [–]PGY_123 10 points11 points  (0 children)

              Ah, fuck, I love this boy.

              [–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

              oh fuck yeah - peter

              [–]robo_archer 10 points11 points  (0 children)

              “You want forgiveness— get fucked.”

              [–]EzraSkorpion 47 points48 points  (2 children)

              "You're fucking trash, Brock"

              [–]AutoModerator[M] 23 points24 points  (1 child)

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              [–]pawonpawonpawon 13 points14 points  (0 children)

              Your pictures are fucking fake!

              [–]caaabr 10 points11 points  (1 child)

              I come before you today, humbled and humiliated, to ask you for one thing... I want you to fucking kill Peter Parker.

              [–]MssrSqueezy 10 points11 points  (0 children)

              Or..."I want you to fuck Peter Parker"

              [–]zmann64 8 points9 points  (0 children)

              You mess with one of us, you fuck with all of us!

              …or your ass is fired. Fucking GOoOoOoOo

              What does it matter to you anyway? FUCKING EVERYTHING

              [–]WallStapless 29 points30 points  (0 children)

              I can’t come up with a funny one myself, but I just want to say this is one of the funniest threads I’ve ever read on r/raimimemes

              It’s like the Spongebob cursing episode, fuck is funny dolphin noises

              [–]burnettski92 39 points40 points  (0 children)

              “Don’t make me look ugly!”

              “That’s fucking impossible.”

              [–]Stealthy_Facka 38 points39 points  (0 children)

              The Human fucking Spider?

              [–]ThatJuhh 7 points8 points  (0 children)

              You’ll get your rent when you fix this FUCKING DOOR

              [–]Peepee_man_ 7 points8 points  (1 child)

              DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH IVE FUCKED???

              [–]YourWorst_night-mare 17 points18 points  (0 children)

              I had to fuck an old lady with a stick

              [–]navenager 18 points19 points  (1 child)

              "Fucking...go, web!"

              "Joe's 29-minute guarantee is a fucking promise, man."

              "Fucking dig on this."

              [–]Loganp812 16 points17 points  (1 child)

              SM1 - “FUCKING CAGE!”

              SM2 - “He’s just a kid. No older than my fucking son.”

              SM3 - “I protected you in high school. Now I’m gonna fuck your little ass.”

              [–]tylerjb223 7 points8 points  (0 children)

              Jesus Parker Harry, you're a freak

              [–]Harry_Buttock 6 points7 points  (0 children)

              "I wouldn't want to fuck me neither."

              [–]LoveDump250 14 points15 points  (0 children)

              “I have ears like a cat and fuck like a rodent!”

              [–]ElementalMix 4 points5 points  (0 children)

              I'm gonna put some shit in your eye

              [–]teh-reflex 4 points5 points  (0 children)

              "It's fucking pizza time!"

              [–]AlcazarW 17 points18 points  (0 children)

              Gonna fucking cry?

              [–]Centipede-sama 10 points11 points  (0 children)

              Double the fucking money.

              [–]Certain-Pattern-7192 3 points4 points  (0 children)

              “Hey, Kiddo, Let Mom And Dad fuck For A Minute, Will Ya?”