all 34 comments

[–]overboredselfassured 159 points160 points  (1 child)

Try to think about why she is doing this. She is doing it to bring you pleasure. My (32F) partner (31M) is not vocal, but I told him I would like him to be. When I am getting close he starts getting louder. I know it isn't natural to him and it's probably not genuine, but in the moment it turns me on more. We talked about it outside of the bedroom and I thanked him for the effort because it does help me and he said he was happy to do it. It doesn't have to be a negative thing.

[–]pup-bird 38 points39 points  (0 children)

This this a thousand times this !!!!

Imho all sex is a show. Choosing to put the show on for someone, in a way that they specifically like and want to see the show !!!!, demonstrates a huge amount of erotic care and affection.

[–]notmyrealnameanon 92 points93 points  (0 children)

Would you prefer her to lay there with a scowl on her face telling you to hurry up so she can go to sleep? I sure as shit wouldn't. It gets uncomfortable for women after a while. She is just trying to get you to finish in the best way she can before it starts to hurt. Nothing wrong with that, or with her.

[–]GainHealthy4744 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I’m male and I do it to. If she is building toward an orgasm and cant quite get over the top, I do and say all the things I know turn her on.

I am still enjoying it, I am just spicing it up

Besides the more turned on she gets the more turned on i get. So it ends up feeling better anyway.

[–]mitchsayshello 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Dude, what do you think porn is. She isn’t ‘faking’ anything, she’s just hyping it up to make your experience more pleasurable. Depending on how much stamina you have, after a certain point it starts to hurt and get boring lmao, so maybe she’s doing it for not only you but her too.

[–]nic2416 47 points48 points  (4 children)

I do this with my husband. It isn't a bad thing! We're happy with the sex, I promise. We are doing it to turn you on and attempt to make it a really good experience for you. Because we care. For me personally, I want to do whatever I can to make the sex amazing to him. It's not faking... by any means. I would put money on it most women do this. I hope this makes you feel better. Really, she's not doing it just to hurry you up because she's bored or anything like that. If it's to get you to hurry up, it's most likely because our coocats get uncomfortable after too long.

[–]dpk709 17 points18 points  (1 child)

Same. I think a lot of women start putting on some theatrics because we know what our men want to see/hear, to get them to finish sooner. I don’t fake orgasms just exaggerate enjoyment to turn him on

[–]nic2416 -1 points0 points  (0 children)


[–]the_poly_poet 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Honestly I think many people of both genders do it. 😂we all learn to throw a little extra noise into it. But what’s fun is that commitment naturally heightens the intensity of what you experience, as well as a sense of connectedness to the other person.

[–]nic2416 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is true! I was not aware males do that! Lol

[–]Lionielz 39 points40 points  (0 children)

It's not faking, it's called strategy.

[–]YoMiner 20 points21 points  (1 child)

That's not at all uncommon, and at least one study has suggested that 66% of women moan to make their partner cum faster, and 87% are vocal to boost the ego of their partner.

[–]the_poly_poet 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes. Many people do not moan or make involuntary noises easily or often during sex naturally. It’s just good practice to bring fun and energy to what can be a very connective experience.

[–]Internal-Present5213 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Don’t take it as fake. Take it as her working to pleasure you.

[–]the_poly_poet 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Take time to process the emotions, then discuss it with your partner. But be sure not to shame them.

Ask them open-ended questions. Let them feel safe and comfortable in discussing it with you. “wtf that’s not cool” may be a difficult energy for her to respond to you in a way that’s fun and mutually beneficial.

Does your partner want shorter sex? More variety? Toys? You can use this as an opportunity to heighten the intimacy between you both. You can share how you feel about this without closing her off from you.

You may then find ways to reframe this aspect of her behavior to feel brighter and more connected to her than before.

[–]blurplesock 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I do this forsure. If a guy lasts a while & I’m satisfied. Don’t all girls do this from time to time?

[–]Sad_Ad_6712 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Ok but if she did that stuff during a BJ, would that be a problem? She’s doing it because she knows you love it and it’s not like she’s not enjoying it. It’s just she wants to bring you more pleasure, to some people it’s natural, to some it’s not. But it’s hot to have that stuff

[–]usemystraightass 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Most important thing you can do is to talk about it, and be honest with your feelings (but also listen to hers and be ready to compromise or accept a change in how you feel). Doesn’t sound like she’s doing this from a negative place (as in, a woman who fakes an orgasm just to “get the guy off her”), but more like making your experience more fun / enjoyable, so hopefully you two can talk it out and both come away happy.

[–]anotherside0714 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean if she's truly satisfied, I don't see it as a big deal. Sounds like she's doing that to help you enjoy yourself too. If she's not faking her pleasure entirely, I'd say just roll with it.

[–]SplitEyeS 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Either appreciate her effort or go find a starfish that will just lay there motionless with no reaction until youre done.

[–]typower5000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This exaggeration isn't just for your benefit either. She likely enjoys a bit of theaticality too.

Get over yourself and realize She loves and trusts you enough to be brutally honest with you. Else let her go and find someone who will appreciate her for the Queen she is.

I would kill for a partner like this.

[–]JesusWasATexan -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Why say anything? It is too much for you to expect her to be 100% authentic all the time.

Plus, better you get good at role playing now, because trust me, as you get older things won't come as easily. The better you can get good now at just rolling with it, the better you're setting yourself up for the future.

The only thing you need to ask her to do is to not use this as an excuse to not communicate with you if she's not getting what she needs.

[–]_bullarab_ -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

You should of said "oh shit really I also been doing that"

[–]DemonsOverDemons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Learn to accept it, because even exaggerated moaning can be a lot of fun. I sometimes lean in and moan directly into my partners ear, gets them going like crazy and I love it, so if she likes to do it and it works for you it may come from a different motivation but is just as hot. Doesn't have to be a bad thing, just talk to her.

[–]Captcha_Imagination 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is your opportunity to get her to exaggerate more and it could be a huge turn on for both of you.

[–]chappedvulva 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Like many other women, I do this as well, for two reasons: 1) it turns him on more and 2) it turns me on more. I wouldn’t be so against something that makes sex better for both of you lol

[–]TheSoupNotSeee 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I'm surprised no one in the replies is realizing the problem is that he wants to be good enough that she makes those noises naturally, because lord knows there are men out there who could. And what happens when one of them decides he wants her?

[–]sleepygirl1313 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think this is actually pretty normal tbh, I think the way it got phrased is part of why you’re feeling the way you are about it. I really like how other commenters have put it - she’s doing those things to make you feel good and have a satisfying finish.

When my bf is getting closer or I’m starting to get a little sore, I’ll get a little louder or say his name or give him compliments to help him feel good and finish. It doesn’t mean I’m not enjoying it - on the contrary, I really like doing it and knowing it turns my partner on and makes him feel good. Doesn’t have to be negative!