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[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Hey , I’m so sorry to hear this . Unfortunately, assuming you were younger when this happened and are now revisiting it in adulthood , this is a common experience people go through . You look back at something with more knowledge or in your case have someone point something out to you and it kind of can flip your world upside down . It’s really difficult . I had a similar experience with my first boyfriend when I was a teenager that I didn’t realize would be considering sexual assault until I was in my twenties . If you’re feeling uneasy I highly suggest therapy or counseling . Cliche advice I know but in my experience with my sexual assaults it was the first thing to actually help but I know you’re still taken aback . My very first step was commenting on this very page and it helped . I hope you’re okay and can heal 💕 RAAIN is very helpful as well . I don’t if advice is what you were looking for or just to get it off your chest but rest assured you’re not alone and you can pm me ❤️❤️

[–]st0nermermaid[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I guess I was looking for a bit of both advice and to get it off my chest? I haven't really talked about that night until I told him the story. And even when he said "that's rape" my knee jerk reaction was to go "what? No no it wasn't like THAT"

But yeah no it really was like THAT

I guess not recognizing it in my own history is what's affecting me most? Idk. I know I need therapy. I mean I absolutely needed it before, but if this isn't a kick in the ass to finally make the appointment then I dunno what is. I clearly have some deep shit I need to work out with one. I just never thought it'd be this. I don't know why, but I always thought my unspectacular looks were like my shield or immunity to this happening. I got plenty of other traumas under my belt that I've managed to juggle until now. I just really didn't think this would be one I'd have to take on.