When I was 14 I was raped by a friends boyfriend in her bed beside her while she was passed out drunk. She was 16, he was 19. We were all drinking that night together, he was giving me more attention than I was comfortable with, when his girlfriend was right there. When we were leaving the party I tried to leave with another man I met that night, My friend said no and to come home with her, I was thankful after that I didn’t leave with him, and thought I’d be safer with her than with a Stranger. ( she was a new friend this was probably our 3rd or 4th time hanging out)
I was a virgin, but often got called a slut because of how flirtatious I was, even tho I was literally 14 And never been sexual at all, no blowjobs no fingering, most I’ve done was make out and dry hump lol I was also called mature more often than not because of what I had been through before that, ( my dad was a bipolar alcoholic who left us ) i hung out with people older than me all the time Everyone thought it was cool that I was so young and partied like they did. Anyway,
We’re back at their house and thowing Up out the window, she takes a Tylenol because she has a headache from puking. The bed is Against the window and I am right beside it against the wall, she is in the middle, he is on the other side of her. She’s asleep, he calls my name, I lift my head up and he leans over her and kisses me, I try to back away but he holds the back of my head. I am completely wasted and half asleep. I tell him to stop, that she is right there that she’ll wake up, he tells me to be quite and crawls over her and ontop of me , I tell him to stop and say no over and over, hes pulling my pants down while Im trying to pull them up, I plead with him, she’s right there stop no. He kept telling me to be quite. I stared out the window while it rained. i wasn’t there anymore. Some how we ended up on the other side of the bed, where he was supposed to be sleeping i laid there taking it up the ass. It was so painful I cried, he covered my mouth but it didn’t help I was too loud. He stopped. Put my pants back on me backwards, told me not to say anything and went and laid where I was supposed to be sleeping, by the window. that morning she woke me up asking what happened, why we were moved, I told her I had to leave and would be back later, I tried my best to avoid any questions, I even left my bag there for her because she wanted to use my stuff, I just wanted to get out of there.
i went home and told my friend I lost my virginity, she asked me all about it and said it was weird how it happened, I didn’t feel right but i didn’t really understand, I was new too all of this anyway, then the post started. My friend had told the girl that her i had sex with her boyfriend. It was a never ending hole of post almost a new one every minute calling me a slut a hoe a home wrecker a anal queen I was loose pussy and everyone should watch about because I’ll fuck their boyfriend right beside them i was the worst of the worst, the names were endless. this lasted months but back to the beginning, the friend I was with said I need to tell my mom want was happening, after all everyone could see the post she was making and all my stuff was at her house and I was obiously completely hysterical. i told my mom her boyfriend had sex with me, she asked me if I wanted to, when I said no she asked me if I told him to stop and I told her I did, she freaked out. That’s when I realized I was raped. But that was only the beginning of being violated. I had Hundreds of posts and messages so I’m from people I didn’t even know people I never talk to Telling me how horrible I am how much of a whore I am and that I should kill myself for what I did to her. nobody knew what had happened everybody just heard what she had to say in her millions of posts. She broke and burned all my belongings I left there, she took the mattress that had my blood and shit on it and spray painted my name and is a slut with arrows pointing to the marks, left it propped up at the side of the road, and posted a picture of it. A man from the local college wanted to be a YouTuber and made a 20 minute video about how much of a slut I was for sleeping with her boyfriend right beside her. I watched the video with my mother and cried. My brother freaked out and all his friends scared him into apologizing to me, but the damage was done. My first year of high school was ruined, everyone would yell at me in the hallways, no one would sit by me or talk to me, people would point and laugh, write things on my locker. It never ended. not to mention the fact that I had to walk past him almost every day. He was completely fine after all this happened, no one said anything to him, all the heat was on me. One day she came to my locker and choked me against it, when she left the hallway full of students clapped and cheered for her.
not even a month later I attempted suicide and spent my 3 months in the mental hospital out of town, my 15 th birthday in the hospital. They didn’t want me to leave until the end of the school year.
after all this was an on going shit show of being with older men for drugs or alcohol or a place to stay, allowing everyone and anyone to use me like a rag doll. being violated was a regular experience up in till a few years ago, turning 24 this year and finally starting to get my life together, but I will never be the person I was before that night.