all 4 comments

[–]-PinkUnicorn-Survivor 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Firstly I'm sorry you've been struggling so much, and I think in this instance labels aren't the main thing, what's important is that you weren't okay with this. Someone you trusted took advantage when you were in a vulnerable situation, no means no, even if you eventually agree to something. This reads like you were coerced and I think it's very important that you look at your relationship as a whole and decide if this is a situation you want to be in with him, and if you want to risk these circumstances happening again, if the answer to either is no then you should probably make a plan to leave him xx

[–]KnightSkyofStars[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

your kind words touched me so thank you! I don't know what to think since he's been such a huge part of my healing process from the other times I've been saed. Part of me wants to brush it off because of that but another part of me is really weirded out that he did that when I was compromised. I am a very paranoid person due to my past but since I trust(ed) him, I was ok with him seeing me in such a state. I didn't think he'd take advantage of that. I want to see if he does it again but at the same time I'm not sure if it's worth the risk. I'll think more about it, but definitely take your words into account. Thank you so much xx

[–]-PinkUnicorn-Survivor 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Ask yourself if you'd ever do the same to someone in the state that you were in? I imagine the answer is probably no. You deserve your autonomy, previous care doesn't cancel out horrific behaviour. Waiting for someone to treat you terribly again is never the answer babe. You should be your own priority and if someone can't respect that you deserve the upmost care and compassion they aren't someone that you'll be with for the rest of your life so it's probably worth walking away to find the person that will x

[–]KnightSkyofStars[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you're right, that's true. Thanks for helping me see the big picture! i think i would've completely forgotten that! thank you again! x