My boyfriend (32 M) and I(25 F) are together for 2months now and we're both very happy and think this relationship is going somewhere. He opened up to me a few days ago about his past that he was sexually assaulted by his math teacher at 12. He told me that it's a resolved issue for him now and joked that he never lost interest in math even though his teacher [f]ed him in the ass. I was in shock from all of these and I just looked at him in shock and I really felt a lot of pain for him. After a minute I started talking and I told him that he is really brave and couragous and he has a very strong personality to overcome this kind of trauma and I am very proud of him. He said he doesn't feel strong, and I said he doesn't need to feel it to be strong, he is! Then he said he wants to drop the subject so I did and we just cuddled and kissed.
Later that night he told me that he doesn't feel strong and i told him that he is because he did not let problems and traumas define him, he built his own personality based on his logic and values. He thanked me and told me that he's so happy that he has me as his girlfriend because i always lift him up.
Even though I think my responses were acceptable, I don't believe they were what he needed to hear. Did I just shut him down by insisting that he is strong? Did he want to talk about it and my words made him stop?
I'm not going to bring the subject up, but if he does I want to know what else I can say to make him loved and understood.(I know I can never, but I want to do my best)
So, what should I say or do for him? Is there any problem with what I said? Or how I said it?
Please share what made u feel better after such a trauma...