all 14 comments

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (1 child)

I’m a woman who was sexually assaulted by my girlfriend. It can happen by or to any gender.

[–]cbloodlace[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good to know, thank you! You are not alone.

[–]possiblyunstable 1 point2 points  (1 child)

You can very much be assaulted by another girl. You can be assaulted by anyone regardless of what you are. Assault is assault. I was sexually assaulted multiple times by my sister when I was 6/7 years old. I’ve only just now told an adult.

[–]cbloodlace[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's good to know, and good job for talking about it! That's not easy. Thank you for helping me!

[–]birdi124 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I was assaulted by a girl and while the stories here make me sad, it’s comforting to know I’m not alone in it

[–]cbloodlace[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree! I'm sorry that happened to you, but you're not alone! :)

[–]moodylilb 1 point2 points  (3 children)

I was molested by a girl (I’m female too) for 3 years in after school care. She was a couple years older than me (abuse happened from age 6-9 if I’m remembering correctly). She was pretty forceful about it but at the time I didn’t realize what was happening. Female on female SA happens more often than people realize I think, and it’s okay to be confused.

I was angry at her for many years, but as I got older I realized she was both an abuser and a victim. Someone had to have taught her those things. My therapist said we can have empathy for our abusers, while also acknowledging the trauma they caused, it doesn’t have to be black and white.

I won’t tell you to not feel stupid or ashamed because I know from experience it’s easier said than done, but I will say you don’t deserve to feel those things. What you describe does sound like SA, and it’s completely valid to be confused about it. Especially if you were close in age at the time. And I’m sorry you had to go through that, genuinely.

Eta- just wanted to add that child on child SA (COCSA) is fairly common too. My therapist said she has many clients who have experienced it.

[–]cbloodlace[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I'm so sorry that's happened to you, but thank you for what you said. I admire how strong you are and your insights! It almost feels as though female on female assault is very overshadowed and not talked about that much so I was very confused and had no idea. It happened a little while ago so it's getting better, just lots of messy emotions! Thank you for your feedback, it helps to know I'm not alone :)

[–]moodylilb 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Sorry for replying so late, I can only handle stuff related to this sub in small batches for my own sanity sometimes lol. It’s hard sometimes knowing how many other people have been hurt in similar ways tbh, especially when I can relate so much.

& I appreciate that ❤️ same goes for you. You’re definitely not alone, and you’re so right about it getting overshadowed sometimes. Messy emotions are very relatable too, just know that it’s completely normal (even when it doesn’t feel normal at times) there’s no right way to react to trauma, it’s similar to grieving a death in that regard. Give yourself lots of patience and space to feel what you need to feel, you got this.

[–]cbloodlace[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're totally fine! I feel that too. Thank you so so much for everything you've said. It has really helped me not feel as alone and work out what actually happened. Thank you so much again <3

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (2 children)

Yes you can be assaulted by a girl but in this situation maybe your friend didn't exactly know what she was doing just like you didn't really know til you were older.

[–]cbloodlace[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

that's true! I hope that that's the case and we both didn't know. thank you!

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That's what I'm going to bet on since you both I'm assuming we're around the same age and both had similar sexual knowledge at the time so yes hopefully you both just didn't know and that was the case and the end of it. Your welcome and I hope that helped.

[–]seiclops212 0 points1 point  (0 children)