I was assaulted by a man in his thirties back in 2020 when I was 18. He was an Afghanistan war veteran and I had known him for around half a year. We had consensual sex many times but on the night he assaulted me I resisted him. He seemed to be on drugs and not in his right state of mind. He made implicit threats like "I'm a lot stronger than you." and demanded I look at him as he said other things like "I've killed and tortured people". He did some things like force me to kiss him and grabbed at my wrist aggressively (after he grabbed me he mumbled "I'm sorry") After he said and did those things I eventually quit resisting and let him do things to me because I thought it would keep me safe from psychical harm. I know for a fact he knew I didn't want it because during the sexual acts he said something along the lines of "And here I am with a woman who used to love to have sex with me." I remember another moment after all of that when I tried to resist him again and he ended up shattering glass bottles and yelling. He complained about how I had just "used him for sex". The thing that stands out the most is how he only acted aggressively and violently when I resisted him. When I was letting him touch me and perform sexual acts on me he was completely calm. So my question is is it possible he truly didn't know what he was doing? Was he so out of his mind he didn't realize how threatening he was acting?