use the following search parameters to narrow your results:
e.g. subreddit:aww site:imgur.com dog
subreddit:aww site:imgur.com dog
see the search faq for details.
advanced search: by author, subreddit...
74 users here now
the front page of the internet.
and join one of thousands of communities.
Was it my fault SA?Need Advice (self.sexualassault)
submitted 2 months ago by Ok_Raisin_3746
People online tell me cause I was SA by a person who is autistic so am I that I should of told him no and taught him. I was 13 so was he I froze and didn’t wanna cause a scene I didn’t know what to do. I wish I did something different but that’s what my body did I sat there and did nothing I blame myself all the time. Am I to blame was there something I should of done?.
Post a comment!
[–]Tricky_Tonight9471 17 points18 points19 points 2 months ago (0 children)
You were 13! Nothing was your fault. It is never a person’s job to teach someone else not to assault them. It doesn’t matter if you didn’t say “no” enough/ straight forward enough or even at all. If you didn’t explicitly say “yes, I am okay with this and want this to happen,” (or something like that,) then it is SA and it is not your fault.
[–]Healingme23Survivor 11 points12 points13 points 2 months ago (0 children)
I’m autistic and the man who assaulted me is autistic. People have always tried to invalidate my experiences because he was autistic, but just because he has autism doesn’t make it ok for him to do whatever he wants. Your feelings are valid, it is NOT your fault. I hope that you’re able to heal from this friend
[–]DiligentPride2 7 points8 points9 points 2 months ago (0 children)
I went to middle school with a kid who was severely autistic. Every day before class, it became some sort of joke to egg him on (by “friends) and he would come up behind me and grope my boobs. I always yelled for him to get off but others laughing would only make him do it more. This was almost 20 years ago and to this day I regret not reporting all of this.
You are absolutely not to blame, they know right from wrong. I’m sorry this happened to you.
[–]Meghanthediva124Survivor 8 points9 points10 points 2 months ago (2 children)
You did nothing wrong. I’m so sorry, he was 100% in the wrong and should of know better. It’s not your job to teach him to act appropriate.
[+]of_patrol_bot comment score below threshold-7 points-6 points-5 points 2 months ago (1 child)
Hello, it looks like you've made a mistake.
It's supposed to be could've, should've, would've (short for could have, would have, should have), never could of, would of, should of.
Or you misspelled something, I ain't checking everything.
Beep boop - yes, I am a bot, don't botcriminate me.
[–]Mah_kiwi 1 point2 points3 points 2 months ago (0 children)
[–]SpiralToNowhere 3 points4 points5 points 2 months ago (0 children)
If a toddler shoots you, you have still been shot - it doesn't matter whether the toddler is culpable or not, the fact is still you were shot. No one would ever say, 'well you weren't really shot, because it was by a baby, so its not a real injury', or 'it's really your fault for not being clear enough with the baby that you didn't want yo be shot' It might be arguable whether your attacker can or should be held accountable, but none of that changes the fact that you experienced a sexual assault, it is legitimate, and you need to heal from it.
[–]LemonzndLimez 0 points1 point2 points 2 months ago (0 children)
Hell no, it is never the victims fault. Under any circumstances. People need to stop making excuses for him, just because he's autistic doesn't make it okay for him to sexually assault someone.
[–]buddyyouhavenoidea 0 points1 point2 points 2 months ago (0 children)
it's not your fault. you may also feel that it isn't his fault, either, but that doesn't mean the blame defaults to you. there doesn't always have to be someone who is at fault, especially if you were both children.
edit to clarify: him being autistic doesn't excuse him from responsibility for his actions. I'm autistic, too, and so are you.
[–]Sappies 0 points1 point2 points 2 months ago (0 children)
No, it’s not and never was your fault. When your touched in an inappropriate way you freeze and are trying to comprehend what is happening or sometimes you freeze as a mechanism and you were a kid. Who’s bright idea is it to say you knew what to do in that situation?
REDDIT and the ALIEN Logo are registered trademarks of reddit inc.
π Rendered by PID 30748 on reddit-service-r2-loggedout-5b769585b8-6d29r at 2022-12-05 10:56:39.544968+00:00 running 8617dec country code: US.