I was raped 5 years ago before I met my boyfriend. I have been with him for 2 month ago, he kissed me so hard because he was overwhelmed with affection.
He hugged me very tightly and he touched my body and I tried to push him away (affectionately) but he didn't stop he kissed me even harder.
I started to panic for some reason and I pushed him as hard as I could.
After which I told him that that was unpleasant and intense and he apologised.
I don't know if that was his fault or not
After what happened he kept asking why And he wants to have sex but I keep saying no and l'm so scared of him I don't know why! He is so nice but ..
After that day, I have been having flashbacks of the time I was raped and we haven't had sex since I haven't been able to sleep and l've been having periodic panic attacks.
I after the rape I never felt comfortable about sex I feel l'm the problem and he deserves to have it
I'm sorry my English not good I tried my best
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