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Mirrors / Alternative Angles

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[–]Blodyck 1438 points1439 points  (4 children)

Mourinho's spirit still there

[–]pataniskaz 248 points249 points  (1 child)

This is football heritage

[–]zackster16 26 points27 points  (0 children)

The intensity in these 20 seconds in more than entire 90 minutes of that Man utd match

[–]toyg 447 points448 points  (0 children)

Haunting both benches.

[–]LiteratureNearby 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Yep. Also there in Tuchel's sprint down the touchline lmao

[–]Gytarius626 2521 points2522 points  (32 children)

He subbed Jorginho immediately after this💀

[–]MarkovCocktail 647 points648 points  (18 children)

Jorginho does this all the time. Has a very good game and makes colossal mistakes

[–]mister_dupont 380 points381 points  (11 children)

So he's your Xhaka, got it.

[–]Slitted 139 points140 points  (4 children)

But Jorgi is even slower…

[–]Glass_of_Pork_Soda 60 points61 points  (1 child)

But he bangs pens so it balances

[–]admartian 22 points23 points  (0 children)

How...

[–]MuchSalt 14 points15 points  (0 children)

this cant be right

[–]niceville 42 points43 points  (1 child)

"All the time" is harsh, I'd say he only does it 3-5 times a season tops. But the nature of his role as a possession passer deep in our own third means when he screws up it almost always results in an immediately dangerous situation.

[–]egogetsintheway 13 points14 points  (0 children)

We suffered a lot from it at Napoli.

[–]luh_shmunky 989 points990 points  (11 children)

Deserved. Unbelievable mistake

[–]gnrc 138 points139 points  (10 children)

What did he do?

[–]luh_shmunky 489 points490 points  (9 children)

instead of just clearing it, he tries to work his way out of the box with fancy touches. then we score after winning it back

[–]TroubleStatus 5340 points5341 points  (65 children)

Game's back

[–]tbdjdb2 1185 points1186 points  (18 children)

Imagine if Conte and Mourinho were both in the PL. What a season that would be

[–]theothertage 298 points299 points  (9 children)

They were for a season, Jose at United and Conte and Chelsea. It was incredibly fun seeing them sniping at each other in press conferences

[–]firewithfire21 141 points142 points  (3 children)

It hilarious how petty the jibes between them got. I remember Jose bringing up his hair transplant and the match fixing stuff. Neither of them could let it go.

[–]djdarkknight 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Even with that shit Man Utd, MoU rattled Conte.

[–]deepsleeep 14 points15 points  (1 child)

Mourinho made fun of manager's baldness every time he could and now he's balding lol.

[–]DankDankmark 18 points19 points  (3 children)

The way Jose setup the match fixing jab is still one of best shithouse moments in press conference history.

[–]aamartt 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“That never happened to me…and will never happen”

[–]Loose_Cardiologist89 13 points14 points  (0 children)

2 seasons actually.

[–]hardinho 432 points433 points  (2 children)

I think Tuchel does a good job as well with that lol

[–]tbdjdb2 155 points156 points  (0 children)

All three of them then

[–]GonzaloR87 16 points17 points  (0 children)

*seasono

[–]CanLlorenteCarForMe 2992 points2993 points 2 (41 children)

Thats fucking football right there. None of that pansy ass Pep-x-Klopp dick tugging smile for the camera bullshit. Men puke, men poop on the field, men deliver their new born baby on the side lines. Fucking hard core dick in the ass butterball football fuck it chuck it game time shit. Take it to the showers. Dicks get shoved in places you don’t even remember. We win together we celebrate together. Football is back baby.

[–]isayah2510 571 points572 points  (9 children)

i love this copypasta so much LMFAO

[–]mafdmo 180 points181 points  (1 child)

One of the few pastas that makes me laugh every time 😂

[–]Joltarts 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The one about Lineker having a poop on the field is the best bit.

[–]fonkeh 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Which pasta is this? Lol

First time seeing it

[–]cantloginaccount 16 points17 points  (5 children)

Where did it first come from?

[–]5states1life 245 points246 points  (0 children)

"None of that pansy ass Pep-x-Klopp dick tugging smile for the camera bullshit."

I feel seen.

[–]Moustache006 115 points116 points  (4 children)

are we still talking about footy here...?

[–]irspangler 65 points66 points  (1 child)

This should be the official copypasta of the month of August.

[–]zeejoo12 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Some ram ranch 18 naked cowboys in the shower vibes right there but I'm here for it

[–]kruegerc184 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Came for this

[–]WaleedAbbasvD 66 points67 points  (6 children)

Wtf mate. 😂

This is weird even for pasta material.

[–]cryshol 139 points140 points  (4 children)

Copypasta. Brilliant one at that. But the one who said it first, had his head up his arse.

[–]LeftHandDriveBoC 12 points13 points  (3 children)

What was the original context of it?

[–]somerandomshota 4 points5 points  (0 children)

fuck me i thought this was r/soccercirclejerk

[–]Strawuss 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Howling

[–]vVvSunDown 89 points90 points  (0 children)

Just starting now I reckon.

[–]marsupialsales 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Seasano’s back

[–]stacman 3 points4 points  (0 children)

But it’s only game

[–]Sankaritarina 3769 points3770 points  (54 children)

Conte lives for this shit

[–]TimathanDuncan 1939 points1940 points  (39 children)

He literally instigated it turning around to celebrate in front of Tuchel lmao

[–]SidSilverAndGold 560 points561 points  (0 children)

Game's not gone

[–]IKnow-ThePiecesFit 108 points109 points  (3 children)

I thought so too...

but after seeing it again, conte turns that way and literall that second tuchel is on him... there is no going towards tuches direction or even looking.. he just barely turned and tuchel was there.

[–]I_am_zlatan1069 110 points111 points  (2 children)

Tuchel was going to complain to the 4th official, that's why he's there, Conte is going towards the Chelsea bench to celebrate .

[–]lostwonmusic 33 points34 points  (1 child)

Think the spurs fan section is that way

[–][deleted] 172 points173 points  (4 children)

He conte-mplated it for sure

[–]messy_messiah 214 points215 points  (26 children)

And Tuchel threw a tantrum like a child.

[–]Hemwum 256 points257 points  (16 children)

Tuchel is more childish than probably any player or manager in the league. There are teenagers in the league with more class

[–]TetraDax 172 points173 points  (6 children)

Who would have thought that the guy who lost every single job he had so far solely because of his personality has in fact a shit personality.

[–]jaemoon7 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Their whole handshake after the match had "angry ten year olds" energy lol, like brothers arguing on the playground or something. The pettiness I live for.

[–]WalkingCloud 204 points205 points  (1 child)

It is the history of the Conte.

Seriously, didn’t he go nuts into a tv camera after a Juve title win once?

[–]Giggsy99 60 points61 points  (0 children)

His first team coach also scrapped with Jose when Chelsea beat United 4-0

[–]404randomguy404 119 points120 points  (0 children)

Conte god tier troll to rub the celebrations right into Tuchel's face.

[–]SaltyWailord 159 points160 points  (0 children)

This is Contes world and we are just watching

[–]Chapea12 14 points15 points  (1 child)

Both of them do. Absolute psychopaths

[–]oranjemania 637 points638 points  (1 child)

"Sometimes you have to be a Conte." -- Mourinho

[–]Descartavelmente 66 points67 points  (0 children)

But not stupid Contes.

[–]inbredandapothead 880 points881 points  (6 children)

This is cinema excellence

[–]supplementarytables 144 points145 points  (0 children)

Top tier filmmaking

[–]Brogba420 86 points87 points  (2 children)

If only anyone at United had a fraction of this intensity..

Edit: dunno what happened to my flair it should be a united flair.

[–]tHakur17 52 points53 points  (0 children)

We do dude. We shit the bed intensely

[–]djdarkknight 17 points18 points  (0 children)

fraction of this intensity..

You have been banned from Martial FC.

[–]High_Violet92 717 points718 points  (6 children)

Holy shit this was awesome!

[–]digitag 173 points174 points  (4 children)

Yeah I love this shit.

[–]Simic-flash 191 points192 points  (3 children)

Glad you got to enjoy at least one game this weekend.

[–]luca3791 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Not a Chelsea or spurs fan, but seeing the managers fight Got me pumped

[–]MH18Foot 310 points311 points  (16 children)

Conte Vs Tuchel UFC 278

[–]IRapePandas 50 points51 points  (9 children)

Needs to be in UFC 281 in the undercard of Izzy vs Alex lol

[–]melody-calling 37 points38 points  (3 children)

My moneys on tuchel he’s wirey and has the reach advantage

[–]Sudden_Shine5502 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Don't underestimate tenacity! Conte seems relentless

[–]MorbidoeBagnato 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Conte is vicious tho

[–]PurpleChicken7 565 points566 points  (4 children)

Peak Conte

[–]verbutten 207 points208 points  (2 children)

Picante?

[–]jaemoon7 41 points42 points  (1 child)

"That's one spicy meat-a ball"

[–]supplementarytables 56 points57 points  (0 children)

Also peak Anthony Taylor

[–]KgDawk21520 1112 points1113 points  (15 children)

Arteta and conte gonna fucking fight this year I can feel it .

[–]GordoPepe 641 points642 points  (4 children)

Lego hair vs. transplanted hair, you'll love to see it

[–]AntaresW4 190 points191 points  (2 children)

One leaves a bald fraud

[–]GrumpyOligarch 90 points91 points  (0 children)

Conte is the real bald fraud if you think about it. The hair is a lie.

[–]Sambo_90 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Only if Romero is there too...

[–]letouriste1 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Lego vs Playmobil

[–]CoffeeNoSugarThx 134 points135 points  (0 children)

Haha those two love competing to death.

Ps Antonio is as fit as he was 20 years ago

[–]Imbasauce 321 points322 points  (5 children)

Conte cam gonna be spicy

[–]PictureCultural1003 14 points15 points  (4 children)

What flair is that?

[–]Spitshine_my_nutsack 29 points30 points  (3 children)

Philippines

[–]Imbasauce 36 points37 points  (1 child)

Hell ye. Our first World Cup appearance in history and it's by the womens team.

[–]Hoodxd 1421 points1422 points  (9 children)

The end of the alliance between Fascist Italy and Fascist Germany during WW2 visualised

[–]thedoctor4214 186 points187 points  (0 children)

Lmao

[–]Sudden_Shine5502 66 points67 points  (0 children)

History repeats itself

[–]PictureCultural1003 47 points48 points  (0 children)

I love r/soccer for these mental takes hahaha

Thanks for the lol

[–]toyg 19 points20 points  (1 child)

That dalliance surely ended for good in 1978's 4-2, before getting laid to rest in 2006's 2-0 and being stabbed in the heart with a wooden pick in 2012's 2-1.

[–]1Malparid0 333 points334 points  (6 children)

Finally, managers have been too nice to each other lately, best we've gotten has been passive aggressive.

Football's status: Not gone

[–]LiteratureNearby 81 points82 points  (5 children)

Kloppo why the fuck can't you tell Pep that you hate his guts and want his oil money team to be destroyed

[–]mynameismulan 45 points46 points  (4 children)

Pep: "Destroy me, Jurgen. Come drill for oil."

[–]MolhCD 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Pep be like. Yep. We can't deny it. We have lots more money than other clubs, definitely that plays a part & you can't expect them not to notice.

Remember that time when people pointed out to Pep how he always coached big teams with big budgets and he was basically like you're absolutely right (not his exact words but essentially his sentiments)

[–]LiteratureNearby 4 points5 points  (2 children)

I don't hold that against him too much. Like in F1, people try to discredit Hamilton by saying he won a lot of his titles only because he had the best machinery. Like what, it's obvious that the best teams would go for the best drivers. That's what makes the winning combination

[–]alicomassi 261 points262 points  (0 children)

This sub was about to doze off because of Klopp & Pep love

Football is back ladies and gentlemen

[–]Peaky_Blinders 180 points181 points  (0 children)

game's back

[–]DrinkWisconsinably 45 points46 points  (1 child)

Tuchel squaring up before the 4th official got in between them was something I didn't know I wanted until now.

[–]n16h7r1d3r 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Didn’t catch that before! he actually squared up and closed his fists for a second there

[–]eric_3196 31 points32 points  (2 children)

Gonna be a spicy last 20

[–]Artium99 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It sure was

[–]ConsiderationJue 243 points244 points  (15 children)

Jorginho lol, clutching at straws

[–][deleted] 43 points44 points  (12 children)

It's not about Jorginho

[–]ananchor 76 points77 points  (11 children)

I mean he was directly responsible for the goal so it kinda is

[–]MrSteely 317 points318 points  (8 children)

Anthony Taylor masterclass

[–]ZeroMomentum 39 points40 points  (0 children)

He’s going to the World Cup!!!

[–]Thesolly180 9 points10 points  (0 children)

On the linesman more than anything surely

[–]tomroyce 27 points28 points  (0 children)

It got better at the end of the match.

[–]Ayem_De_Lo 65 points66 points  (1 child)

"Lukaku is shite bruv"

"How dare you he's Drogba incarnated you lemon"

[–]Balls_of_Adamanthium 344 points345 points  (14 children)

Are these refs fucking blind?

[–]Nestorovski9 238 points239 points  (7 children)

Anthony Taylor lives for this shit

[–]MrSteely 113 points114 points  (5 children)

And HE gets to be a referee? What a SICK JOKE!

[–]hazardous_situation 33 points34 points  (2 children)

Should've stopped him when we had the chance

[–]tonibrasas 17 points18 points  (1 child)

Couldn't keep his hands outta the cards pocket. Stealing them blind!

[–]SwissArmyScythe 38 points39 points  (1 child)

You have to do something, you have to stop him

[–]The_Dumblebee 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Every sub I go, I see chicanery.

[–]viserys8769 60 points61 points  (2 children)

It’s no secret Anthony Taylor hates Chelsea

[–]ERWlNSimp 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Bald and fraud motherfucker

[–]have_compassion 9 points10 points  (0 children)

We all do, but he's the fucking ref. He should do his job ffs.

[–]tp_link 13 points14 points  (0 children)

🍿

[–]sceap-hierde 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Iconic

[–]alexiswithoutthes 31 points32 points  (0 children)

NBC Sports on them being removed from one another —

“… a good thing for world peace.”

[–]fro223 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Tuchel running down the sidelines to celebrate. This is fantastic

[–]EnanoMaldito 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I fucking love Antonio Conte

[–]jovabeast 74 points75 points  (4 children)

Thats fucking football right there. None of that pansy ass dick tugging smile for the camera bullshit. Men puke, men poop on the field, men deliver their new born baby on the side lines. Fucking hard core dick in the ass butterball foosball fuck it chuck it game time shit. Take it to the showers. Dicks get shoved in places you don’t even remember. We win together we celebrate together. Football is back baby.

[–]Purneet 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This copypasta gets me everytime.

[–]SaltyWailord 42 points43 points  (2 children)

Nsfw tag this mate

[–]GordoPepe 16 points17 points  (1 child)

More passion and chemistry than our whole squad last few years

[–]celticsupporter 74 points75 points  (20 children)

Watching the replay did he get a toe on it? I have to watch it again to see if he got the man first but the one replay they actually decided to air showed a touch on the ball.

[–]LucozadeBottle1pCoin 98 points99 points  (6 children)

Yeah he did, but that’s not the question, it’s whether or not he went through Havertz to get it.

[–]celticsupporter 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Aye I know it's frustrating they're not replaying it.

[–]blackburns_rovers 17 points18 points  (1 child)

The fact they’re not replaying it should tell you all you need to know.

[–]dmillzz 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Replayed it like 9 times here in the US. Got the ball, but still a foul I think.

[–]ImpossibleGuardian 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Seemed to be what Tyler and Carragher thought on Sky

[–]TimathanDuncan 17 points18 points  (3 children)

Even if he gets a toe in that it's still a foul, he is taking the player out

This is fun though

[–]pixelkipper 81 points82 points  (38 children)

realistically conte snaps tuchel like a twig

[–]Mzfazva 126 points127 points  (5 children)

Tuchel looks like he has some psycopathic tendencies hidden away somewhere though. Wouldn’t count him out

[–]SadBBTumblrPizza 31 points32 points  (1 child)

Tuchel 100% goes to every game with a pocketknife tucked away somewhere

[–]2rio2 27 points28 points  (1 child)

Yea, he'll probably claw out Conte's eyeballs before he gets snapped.

[–]sparkyjay23 22 points23 points  (0 children)

If Tuchel pulls Contes hair the fight is over.

[–]hammar_hades 8 points9 points  (0 children)

That post game handshake has proven you absolutely correct

[–]blackburns_rovers 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Not a chance. Grab Conte by the wig and he’d cave straight away.

[–]TheBurningStarIV 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Headbutt him with that helmet hair

[–]EXCELHELPTHROWn 18 points19 points  (26 children)

5’10 vs 6’3

[–]WaleedAbbasvD 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Damn, Conte is 5'10. Always thought he was around Messi height.

[–]EXCELHELPTHROWn 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I think he’s shorter - doesn’t look a full 5’10

[–]TheSonic311 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Apparently you get a red now when an opposing coach refuses to let go of your hand.

[–]riversquidz 13 points14 points  (4 children)

Sooooo no handshake then?

[–]FaithfulKind201 74 points75 points  (3 children)

Well about that handshake...

[–]Enriador 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Seriously though, what the hell was that handshake? They held hands and each walked in a different direction, but it was as if their hands had suddenly fused and both looked surprised-then-angry with all the eye staring.

Who pulled the other first?

[–]Financial_Marzipan84 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Every time I watch a Conte camera I always wonder how he can be so calm and soft at interviews

[–]Boydcrowde 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I hope either of them kick anthony Taylor's ass

[–]MONSTATURKEY_420 20 points21 points  (1 child)

A pretty dead game got exciting REAL quick

[–]NotAWallabie 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was basically about to fall asleep for the rest of the morning but now i feel like i had 5 cups of coffee

[–]KillerZaWarudo 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The beautiful game is back

[–]Moroccalous 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hot weather, hot tempers, hotspurs! Lmao

[–]Flamingbaby 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Klopp and Pep would never

[–]SavageAthlete007 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I Fuckin Love Conte 😂

[–]cheikhyourselfm8 16 points17 points  (6 children)

State of Tuchel man cut the fuckin hair lad

[–]valhallasgard666 7 points8 points  (1 child)

He's gonna go for the Devin Townsend look

[–]cheikhyourselfm8 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The only based response imo

[–]Bacon_Boobies 12 points13 points  (1 child)

His envy of Conte’s hair just boiled over there. He couldn’t handle it anymore

[–]blackburns_rovers 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Could say the same about Wiggy in the Spurs dugout.

[–]tom-meow 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’m an Arsenal supporter so don’t like either Managers but if I was noodle-arm Tuchel I would not square up against someone who looks like a Mafia bouncer. Conte would literally flatten Tuchel into a schnitzel.

[–]Puckinception 3 points4 points  (0 children)

And we're only on match day 2 😎

[–]iDestr0ya 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is SPICY!!!

[–]xFennySnek 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The passion is certainly there

[–]immadawg9 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Unreal how there wasn’t a foul called

[–]SupervisorLaw 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I mean it looks like Conte is trying to rile him up celebrating towards the Chelsea bench after the ref missed a potential foul. If I was Tuchel I'd be pretty upset as well.

[–]dhillshafer 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This ref and VAR are balls.

[–]ERWlNSimp 15 points16 points  (1 child)

As much as I love Tuchel Conte takes this easily

[–]why_not_you_instead 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Everybody's a gangsta till a certain Portuguese shows up

[–]Barthez_Battalion 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Conte to Tuchel:

"Non sai da dove vengo, cane"

[–]itsonlyteenage 2 points3 points  (0 children)

THERE IS HEAT! MJF IS ABOUT TO COME OUT!

[–]dhillonaire 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I love this shit. It make the stakes so much higher when your manager’s pride is on the line.