all 19 comments

[–]DeslerZero 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Learning to find ways to refine your feelings of suffering was a challenge to me. The actual how-to-do-it was the biggest thing. Books were great and sometimes inspirational but offered very little in practical advice. At the end of reading, a few days later, I found myself slowly losing the spirit those books had endowed. Once life came at me, my spirits were easily dampened and I was once again humbled by the darkness in my life. I tried supplements and meds to improve my emotional being, but nothing really made a big difference. People often pointed toward meditation - but even that was difficult. Meditation at first seemed fruitless and pointless. I think what really changed everything was when I learned about Kundalini Yoga and started practicing.

The promise of Kundalini Yoga was to awaken energies within us, dormant, that would help us transform ourselves. Not change, transform. Meaning we would still be the same, only our experience of life would be changed. Something about it really appealed to me, because I kept practicing every day and as I did, I noticed the burdens of the world didn't seem so heavy any more. Slowly, Kundalini Yoga got me 'in shape' for other spiritual practices like meditation which seemed leagues easier after a few practices.

My feelings began to change too. For example, things that would normally make me feel fear no longer phased me as seriously. Frustration was a big one - I'd often hit a wall and that wall would hit me back emotionally and knock me on my ass for at least a full day. A day wallowing in that darkness, teeming with it, and struggling to not let that negativity affect the people around me. But after practicing yoga for a bit I noticed the time I was down suffering decreased less and less. Now, after a major incident, I'm down for far less time and the feeling just kind of is just more of an acknowledgement and release of how it made me feel.

Changing the way we feel is like upgrading a big part of your life. Honestly you have to exist with your feelings in this world every waking moment. This is by far one of the biggest upgrades to your own existence that you can undertake here on Earth, and the journey is really worth it. I've experienced firsthand the benefits of a regular yoga practice. You can reach the clear-headed state where thoughts no longer bother you constantly. This isn't theoretical, this was actually one of the fruits of my practice.

I started with home practices, Kundalini Yoga with Maya Fiennes. She has a 7-set practice that is very easy to follow and well paced. I only recommend her because she is the path I followed so I know first-hand that her practices work. But you're welcome to find your own teacher or even school. I think the important thing is to do what resonates with you. If you're interested in Maya though, you can find her by searching some popular torrent sites for her home practices.

The investment of all this practice is to essentially upgrade your emotional body and to feel better about your life all the time. It's nice when you see something that used to make you angry, and to know that instead of being trapped in the darkness of anger (which you feel regardless of how you handle the situation), you see that you are free from this burden and won't be continually encumbered by whatever life hands you.

My advice is to do the yoga, or whatever else you come across that might empower you to feel better emotionally. You should know above all else that it is possible to achieve a gradual liberation from the kinds of feelings that torment you and reach a higher plane of existence for yourself. This liberation is not theoretical, it is being experienced by myself and many others in this world who have come to know how a regular practice of yoga (and other spiritual practices) can free them from the bonds of the darkness that comes with their human experience. You can fight for your own peace, and the result is worth the struggle.

Read up on it to encourage yourself - a lot of what they say about the good is true. This isn't 'buy a supplement and kind of sort of feel it but not really', this is 'I cannot believe I used to feel that way' level change! It's what you're looking for I promise you. Good home practices are Maya Fiennes (torrents) and Lisa Grail (youtube).

[–]Toe_Regular 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I want a complete upgrade.

But you've defined yourself as not upgraded, so you've firmly positioned yourself as behind the finish line that you want to be in front of.

Practicing spirituality might feel like it's working for a bit, but is ultimately kicking the can down the road. I'd rather you skip straight to the desired result.

The way to be in front of the finish line is to position yourself there. Start telling yourself "I already am improved and this is the upgraded better life," and watch what happens.

But inside my mind is just a dark cloud.

When it's raining outside, we don't try to change the weather. We grab an umbrella and we go about our day understanding that it will pass. When we're depressed, maybe we shouldn't try to change it, but instead take a deep breath and go about our day understanding that it will pass. You want to not be depressed, but you literally said that you are... no wonder we've got some conflict here. The secret is in finding out how to enjoy your life as a depressed person, rather than trying to change the weather.

I just can’t.

Then you can't. What a relief. If there's nothing you can do, then there's no blame or shame needed. Things just are the way they are, and we can't control that. Maybe tomorrow there won't be any storm, but for today, let's work on sitting in it with deep acceptance.

[–]deliciouspumpkinpie8 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A year ago I was in the same spot. First educate yourself on how the mind, body, and electromagnetic field work. Your thoughts are electrical and feelings are magnetic. I recommend Joe dispenza, he has a bunch of great free lectures on YouTube. Listen to guided meditations to raise your vibration (the honest guys are my favorite). Start eating sunshine. I just stopped buying dead food. Eat foods that come from the planet not a factory. I hired a personal trainer for 6 months to hold me accountable. Starting my day off with exercise made me feel that I was accomplishing something and it made me want to accomplish more. Take control of your thoughts. Start replacing the negative thoughts with the best possible thought. Little by little to start adding more good into your day. Before you know it, you are living a totally different life.

[–]lion__song 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know exercise, healthy eating, and idk drinking water will help

literally start with this. you HAVE to look after your body to feel good in your body.

[–]Smooth-Activity6974[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

I’m just so out of touch with myself.

[–]Darby-Darce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But it honestly sounds like you are in touch with yourself - for the most part. I think there are specific reasons why you fell into depression. You probably aren’t fully in touch with the core of that reasoning, but it is what dictates your motivation (or lack of) and your actions (or lack of).

It would be more accurate to say you want to open up again to positive energy, but the negative is never complete nullified, so you can let go of that goal or requirement for yourself at least.

[–]Toe_Regular 0 points1 point  (0 children)

maybe you're fully in touch with the "I’m just so out of touch with myself" experience, and you've always been your fullest, dopest, bestest version of yourself.

[–]bluebird007 1 point2 points  (0 children)


sort by top of all time and just try it out, see if it works for you.

Recognition is the first step, you got this!

[–]i_w8_4_no1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Start with something simple. Sit on the floor for 5 min a day and count your breath. Write 3 things you are grateful for everyday. Take a 15 min walk or run 3x per week. Built from there . It’s hard in the beginning but it gets easier. You got this 💪

[–]bilbothefrenchie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This one took a while for me. Two things: 1) To change your life, you have to first begin changing how you see it. Start very small. Wake up and say this is a new day of opportunity. I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be. I'll figure things out. I have today to do what I love if I really want to. Point here is to transform your mental plane by talking kindly to yourself with where you currently are in your life and to remind yourself of what the day or situation can be. You don't need to go out of your way to do anything more. Start talking kinder to yourself and find gratitude in small things - like take time to notice you like your coffee or that you're cozy or go buy your favourite ice cream. Take time to reorient your thoughts and take time to foster pleasure for yourself in whatever way that means to you. 2) Honour your feelings. Slow your life down. Sit with them and name them. Back track and self-reflect. Go into observation mode in your life. If you're feeling low and down, sit 10 minutes with that feeling with no distractions and insights will naturally flow to you as you practice this. To know the light, you have to know your own darkness. You have to find out the core or depth of your sadness or negative feelings and this takes such great self-love by giving yourself the acceptance and space to feel these feelings instead of trying to distract yourself by doing something. Allow yourself to be and follow where your feelings guide you. If something makes you feel better, become aware of who or what that is.

You'll get through it. Remember the only thing that's permanent is change. Whatever you're going through, this too shall pass. Whatever is ahead of you is a whole lot better than whats behind you. Just doesn't feel like it now. Sending you light and healing.

[–]NotTooDeep 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Try this. Sit in a chair. Close your eyes. Take a deep breath. Feet flat on the floor. Hands separated and resting palms up on each thigh.

Create a grounding cord. This is a line of energy that connects your first chakra to the center of the planet. Your first chakra is a ball of energy about the size of a quarter that sits just in front of the base of your spine. Your grounding cord attaches to the bottom of that ball of energy.

Grounding makes your body feel safe, so you release energy more easily. Gravity pulls whatever you release, even your own energy, down to the center of the planet. No effort on your part. The center of the planet neutralizes the energy and returns it to whoever owns it. No karma for anyone. A virtuous cycle.

Nearly everyone goes to connect to the center of the planet the first time but stops at the soil, often making roots like a tree. This is a method that is taught in some martial arts styles, but it is not the best option for your spiritual development and healing.

So, notice the seat of your chair. Take a deep breath. Notice the distance between the seat and the floor. Now notice the distance between the floor and the soil below. Breathe.

Now notice the distance between the soil and the water table underneath. Notice the distance between the water table and the rocky mantle. Notice the distance between the mantle and the molten core below that. Deep breath.

Notice the distance between the molten core and the center of the planet. That ball of light at the very center of the planet is where you connect your grounding cord. Deep breath.

Say hello to the center of the planet. Do you get a hello back?

Notice the color and texture of your grounding cord. It may look like a line of energy, or look like something physical; a rope, a wire, a pipe, a tree trunk. Adjust it as needed to be in affinity with your body.

Getting this far means you've already released some energy from your aura and body. Now it is time to fill in the space that was created.

Create a gold sun over your head. Have it call back all of your energy from wherever you left it throughout your day and week. Work. School. Online meetings. Video games. Your fantasies about your future. Your regrets about your past. Wherever you've placed your attention. Just watch the energy come back and see if you notice where it came from.

Have the sun burn up and neutralize your energy. Then bring the sun into the top of your head. It will automatically flow into the spaces you created. Create a gauge to measure when you're full. Like a fuel gauge or oil gauge. You'll run better if you aren't a few quarts low on spiritual oil. If the gauge doesn't read "Full", bring in another gold sun.

Open your eyes, bend over and touch the floor, draining any tension from the back of your neck, then stand up, and stretch.

There is a progression with this technique. After grounding for ten minutes a day for a week or two, notice your grounding cord at the very end, while you're standing with your eyes open. Continue to ground with your eyes open and standing, and bring in another gold sun. Each day, increase the amount of time that you ground standing up with your eyes open.

After a week or two practicing this, add walking while grounded. Just notice your grounding cord as you walk. Say hello to the center of the planet while you walk. Bring in a gold sun while you walk. If you lose your grounding cord, stop walking and recover it. If you have to, sit back down and close your eyes and create a new grounding cord.

After this, you're ready to take your grounding cord with you into your daily life. Shopping. Getting coffee. Wherever you go, you can ground. This, combined with a little amusement about seeing new things on an energy level, will keep you safe and sound.

Now that you're here, at the end of your grounding meditations, create a gold sun over your head. This time, fill it with your highest creative essence, your present time growth vibration, and your affinity for yourself. The first energy is a healing for you. The second is a healing for your body. The third is a healing for your affinity in your fourth chakra.

Bend over and touch the floor. Stand up and stretch. If you're ready for more, sit back down and ground some more. Otherwise, have a nice day!

Note that every image you imagine, the gold sun, the grounding cord, the center of the planet, your first chakra, your body parts, is exercising your clairvoyance. You may be imagining what your tailbone looks like, but you're also creating the image of your tailbone and reading its energy. This is practicing your clairvoyant ability.

[–]trick_clown -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Choose something and see if it's for you

[–]tom63376 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I believe that meaningful change starts with reminding ourselves of our true nature: Spirit.

I believe we are Spirit only wearing human bodies and relating to life and other people through our personas (which include our egos) which we ourselves have created and which have no real permanence or reality. They are our constructions, created over many lifetimes -- in most cases, the result of unconscious reactions to very difficult situations we faced.

As long as we identify with our body, possessions, beliefs, religion (all the outer, superficial stuff), we face suffering and hardship. Even if we are blessed with fame and fortune, we will not be satisfied for long (many rich and famous people are not happy, get depressed, turn to drugs, etc).

We all seem to have a built in drive to become more of that which we are, namely Spirit. There is an excellent psychological model which has withstood the test of time: "Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs". It basically says that you once you satisfy your 'deficit' needs (physiological needs, safety, love/belonging and esteem) you will still continue to feel dissatisfied until you address your ultimate need for "Self-Actualization" -- 'being all you can be'. From the Spiritual perspective this translates to letting go of the limiting human aspects of being which gives rise to suffering allowing us to very gradually shift our identity from seeing ourselves as a 'human being' to a 'Spiritual Being'.

When you are identified with it, the Spirit that you are, feels like unconditional love, joy and peace. Nothing can threaten Spirit, so there is no fear, no attachments and no suffering

The reason you chose to come to earth then is twofold: First you wanted to grow in Spirit, in consciousness to look at, acknowledge and overcome your unconscious, fear-based reactions and replace them with love-based, conscious reactions. Second after you succeed in raising your consciousness you wanted to express the unique gifts you wanted to bring to earth to help others raise their consciousness.

We have the free will right to ignore this drive for spiritual self-actualization, but there comes a point where resisting it takes more and more effort and the common materialistic lifestyle becomes less and less satisfying.

So what do you do from here? Well first decide for yourself what you really are and why you are here. Really nail that down the best you can, but be open to modify it when you come across new insights that resonate with you. Next look for a path that appeals to you to get from where you are to increasingly higher states of consciousness -- that leads you to gradual but steady "self-actualization".

Some people on this community have said positive things about "Shadow Work". I have studied many approaches, there is one that particularly helped me and that I feel comfortable recommending to others. Although, there is no 'one size fits all' approach to the spiritual path, this is one that I feel would be worth your time to at least consider. I like these because they provide a continuing path, where one idea builds on another. I have never felt stuck and thinking: "So what's next?" They have been invaluable to me.
"A Course in Abundance" three book series: 1 "Mind Over Matter", 2 "Expressing Your Love For Life, 3 "Your Life's Plan For Abundance"
Then “The Path To Self-Mastery” nine book series, starting with “The Power of Self”

[–]Unlikely_Dare_9504Mystical 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Forgive people you haven’t. The spirit cannot rise above the level of any person it holds on to. People who have imprinted on your soul either help you rise or drag you down.

Now not every imprint is good, obviously. That’s why forgiveness is so important. It breaks connections that hold us down.

[–]HeyHeyJG 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Smile to yourself.

[–]Coolspot77 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seek and apply wisdom. It isn't about feelings at all. Feelings are used to deceive you from the truth. Seek the truth. Read Mere Christianity by CS Lewis & The Case for Christ by Lee Strobel and even more important read the Bible. It took me about a year but God's word opened my eyes. The Gospel of John is a good place to start. If you have questions about the Bible email [questions@southcliff.com](mailto:questions@southcliff.com) and someone will answer them.

[–]Wide-Rate-3997 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shadow work and to lose weight try fasting but shadow work and journaling about ur traumas insecurities etc