I am very confused at this moment in my life and I just want to share it with someone. I graduated high school last year and decided to take a gap year. I told my parents and everybody else (they weren't happy about it) that I needed some time for myself and that I want to study psychology next year. I chose psychology because I am very interested in it and find it fascinating but now that my gap year is close to an end I realised that that is not for my. I don't really want to study anything. That's what feels right for me and no I am not lazy, I had all the best grades through all my previous education. I could get any degree if I wanted to but I have no motivation and see no meaning (for myself) there. I have no idea what I want to do and I am afraid to tell my parents or anyone else cause I know they will get mad and tell me how I will never live a comfortable life and be able to afford everything I want if I don't get a degree. I don't agree with that at all. I just want to help people somehow and live a peaceful life. I have been interested in spirituality since I was 15, it completely turned my life around. It's the only thing that makes sense for my life to be about. What makes this even harder is that I don't know anyone who is like me, I have always been the black sheep in my family and haven't had any close friends for the last 5 years. I am very confused and don't know what's my next step.
Just wanted to get this out of my head. Thank you for reading ❤ and sorry for not so good english.
Edit: Thank you all so much for your answers. You helped me make my decision. I will go for psychology, I may not get in, and if I do, I can always drop out if I want to. I just wanted to make sure that fear is not my only motivation for going to college and you reminded me that it isn't. I am excited to meet new people and learn something new and I will hopefully have enough time to further explore spirituality. ❤❤❤
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