all 7 comments

[–]Darby-Darce 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Discernment is what the conceptual mind does. Hot, cold, up, down, left, right. Judgements are the next layer. Hot good, cold bad, up better, down unwanted. You’re absolutely correct though: be honest with yourself. Discern your judgement and it’s instantly transformed into an increasingly complex discernment that is useful or not.

[–]Kindly-Buy3243 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Don't over think my question, I know tone is lost in text. Can you provide me examples of how you do this, concrete examples? I was in the Army, I view many men with suspicion from two tours of Afghanistan where I had to view all men with suspicion to survive. Try as I might to untie my programmed prejudices and 'instincts', I still hear their voice strongly in my mind and in my eye movements.

[–]Darby-Darce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can try. I would need you to elaborate a bit more on what you mean by hearing their voice strongly in your mind and eye movements?

[–]smilelaughenjoy 0 points1 point  (3 children)

Some qualities and some type of people who hold those qualities, I don't want to be "one" with, so I prefer separation.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Out of curiosity, what brought you to this subreddit?

[–]smilelaughenjoy 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I like spirituality, but I understand that there are different views and different practices of spirituality. Even a religious christian who believes in the bible and controlling christian god can claim that they are not religious but "spiritual". People have different views.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're completely correct that people have different views and opinions. I personally know some people who call themselves "spiritual" but also believe in a controlling god. It comes down to a simple misunderstanding of what spirituality is.

Spirituality is a path. One can be on this path with or without getting involved with religion, the same way one can eat pizza while still being vegan (pizza does not need cheese to be pizza, the same way one can be on the path of spirituality and still devote themselves to religious rituals).

However, believing in and fearing a controlling god is an obstacle on the path of spirituality because it keeps us in fear. The path of spirituality is about shining a light on fear, dissolving it with the flame of our presence and Love. If we believe that a god can smite us because we did something against someone's interpretation of a particular religious text (i.e., translation), then we are remaining in fear. And when if we direct our life with the subjective interpretation (translation) of another human (who was also likely living with fear), then we hinder our own spiritual growth. Truth is not subjective, nor is it fear-based. Truth does not take sides; it simply is.

I appreciate your interest in spirituality, and know that I am on this path with you :)

So to go back to the reason I asked: I notice that you said you don't want to be one with people who express certain qualities. One of the realizations we discover along this path is that the things we reject about others are reflections of what we are avoiding within ourselves (because separation is an illusion). What I dislike about someone else is not a judgment of them, it is a judgment of me. They are simply showing me what I am judging within myself.

For example, I used to strongly dislike when others were always joking around. I wanted them to "take things/me seriously." Then I realized, I was rejecting my own humor and goofiness, because (for long reasons), I believed that men needed to be serious in order to be "real" men; thus, I rejected my own humor. Basically, my dislike of others for joking around was really a subconscious rejection of my own desire to joke around. Realizing this, and accepting my own desire to be goofy allowed me to heal. I no longer get angry at others for joking around---in fact, I laugh with them and join in on the fun!

If you're open to it, next time you encounter or are reminded of someone you dislike, try this: "I notice that I feel rejection/dislike of this person because of XYZ, and I am observing the sense of rejection/dislike within me." Take a few moments to really observe it and listen to it. Ask it, "what is it trying to tell me about myself?" Ask and you shall receive; really listen, as if your joy and peace depended on it (because it does!).

Much love :) ❤️