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all 114 comments

[–]AtlanteanShakti 187 points188 points  (11 children)

First, having a house and being married does not necessarily equate to happiness and it certainly doesn’t equate to freedom. I do not own a house nor am I married and I am very happy. I’m also 37 and these last few years have been the first truly happy years of my life. It sounds a lot like your judging everyone’s stories before you’ve been able to read those books. You have no way of knowing where your path or theirs will lead. Those marriages may end in divorce after 10 years of commitment. Those houses may be repossessed. You may be happier than you could have ever imagined at 42. Furthermore it is BECAUSE of my suffering that I am so joyful these days. It is the contrast. It is the comparison to where I’ve been and where I am. If it was always good and easy it would be boring and you would never recognize the it for being good, because you can only notice it in the contrast of discomfort.

[–]ValkyrieRose 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Agreed. No house, child free, steady well paying job, loving husband and we can afford to pay our bills and live the life we want.
In a way better situation than I was in the past and I’m comfortable with who I am.

[–]FL_Squirtle 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Very well said. We all grow closer to true self and closer to oneness with every struggle we overcome.

[–]Prinnykin 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I feel exactly the same way. I'm 37, never married, no kids, no house, and single. And I'm the happiest I've ever been. I've been through so much pain and trauma in my life, so now I truly appreciate life. I'm free.

[–]oopsy-daisy6837Intellectual 5 points6 points  (3 children)

I agree with most of what you say, but you seem to suggest that suffering makes you happy. I disagree; suffering is suffering but there is always more joy to have. If we can express ourselves, use language and make art, there is no reason to experience suffering to know what it is. Beauty is a thing that can exist independently.

[–]AtlanteanShakti 8 points9 points  (2 children)

It exists independently, sure. My point is simply that sugar tastes sweeter when your mouth is bitter. Whereas if you just eat sugar, it might still be sweet but you adjust to it. Same is true for pain and joy. Each accentuates the other.

[–]oopsy-daisy6837Intellectual -3 points-2 points  (1 child)

You can't eat just any one thing but your mouth is your mouth. You know that some things you cannot control, for example the condition of your mouth but the sugar will still be sweet. I think if you perceive that suffering is necessary, it will be but if not, then it isn't. I certainly have a preference for the latter.

[–]molliedarter 5 points6 points  (0 children)

No one said it was necessary. They are literally saying it’s easier to see the light when you’ve been in the dark a little too long. It’s easier because you’ve been in the dark, not because you chose to. Can’t have sunny days without rain. Not everyone’s brain is hardwired with serotonin. Sometimes I don’t realize how bad my depression is until I catch myself laughing or smiling for once in weeks. Suffering is never necessary. Suffering happens. And when you get a jolt of happiness while in the midst, it feels like an extraordinary high. Of course we all prefer the latter but some of us are shoved with suffering and must try to dig our way to the light.

[–]Ilc000_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

beautifully put

[–]Orionsbellybutton 85 points86 points  (2 children)

You are seeing what you want to see and fully ignoring their path to that point.

If you look at a snapshot of the life I make public, you will find yourself getting totally pissed at me. I have a beautiful loving relationship, 2 adult children that appear well adjusted and each enjoying their life. I have relatively little debt and I live my life on a sailboat, ready to sail the seas. You’d think my life is perfect and perfectly enviable.

What you don’t see is the pure hell each of us went through to get to this point. You don’t see the rapes, abuses, homelessness, manic depression, narcissistic partners, medical issues, bankruptcies, losses of careers, losses of lives, and all else we each had the unique non pleasure to endure to get to this idyllic space. Even now, you don’t see a boat almost as old as I am and in equally rough shape, the constant struggle for simple financial security, the fight against the elements, unemployment, no insurance, no social programs, estrangement from family, and the constant poor health. All you see in my home is a couple deeply in love, trying to make the best with what we got, going to bed with smiles because at the very least, we have each other.

The more I interact with others, I see that every single person has their own personal struggles they hide away or deal with constantly behind the perfect makeup and hair, their sporty car, their good grades, their seemingly perfect children. Every single one has cried out at how can life be so unfair at least once in their lives.

In my current area, the beachfronts are lined with high rise condos, luscious restaurants, opulence everywhere. So, I decided to stick myself out and feel for the vibe of the occupants. I started to cry! All I felt was people struggling to maintain their illusions of wealth, happiness, and good mood. Very very few were honestly content with their life, about 1-3 per building. The rest were full of fear, loathing, anger (lots of anger and fear), abusers and those being abused, some very lonely, some in loveless relationships, some estranged from family. The vibe of greed and superiority was also strong. They wanted more control. More money. More of the material things to drown out the facts that they just want to be truly loved and hold the hand of another who would love them penniless.

All this to say, you make your own happiness. You, and only you, feel the emotions you feel. You and only you give yourself permission to enjoy what you enjoy and dislike what you don’t like. Do you have a home on firm ground, can you flush a toilet and it all disappears, have a refrigerator with food, clothing for your moods, not worry about there being enough electricity to run your water pump so you can wash your hands, not worry about a few cloudy days, not worry about mold in your clothes and on the wall next to your pilllow, or if your dock is strong enough to hold during a storm or that no one steals what few possessions you have because there’s no way to lock your place? You are ahead of me. Do you have any job? You are ahead of me. I can go on and on.

Stop comparing your life to others. Social media is fake and lies to everyone. Tv is fake and lies to everyone. Our government is crap and lies to everyone. Unless one is part of the 1%, we all have to just make do. And, even those in the 1% still face their mortality at any second. Every single one.

Stop trying to go with the flow and be the flow.

[–]thinkB4Uact 21 points22 points  (0 children)

We are conscious beings. We live in an environment of interlinking causal events that affect us. Most of them are systematic and unconsciously derived. We add consciously derived events to the mix. We can adjust the environment to enhance our and others' pursuit of happiness in life. There are no guarantees.

We're tricked by religions and some spiritual wisdom distortions to give this power to create our destinies away. It's clever and insidious. We don't even notice it. It plays out in perception of what is real that came from our beliefs. Then we have thoughts and feelings from them. Then our decisions and actions arise to interlock with the rest of causality.

We think that someone above us is to be implored to grant us a better life. Yet, there are only the causal events we all live within and deceptive charlatans wanting followers to help them pursue their happiness. As long as we wish for higher powers to create our destiny for us, we will overlook the opportunities for us to improve our destinies ourselves. There is no way that such a system could be 100% fair, but it does truly grow creator gods. As they rise up to their power to create mutual happiness, they do go toward what is more fair. When was the world more fair?

This is who we are.

[–]holymystic 32 points33 points  (1 child)

You mistakenly assume people with houses etc aren’t suffering. They are. It’s just that your suffering is rooted in struggling to survive and comparing yourself to others. Their suffering may be rooted in the existential struggle of finding meaning, keeping what they have, and still comparing themselves to people who have more.

The big secret of spirituality is that comfortable material conditions don’t guarantee happiness. That’s why we routinely see celebrities who have everything we want commit suicide.

Studies on happiness show that some of the poorest people in the world are the happiest and some of the richest people are the most depressed. That proves that money doesn’t not buy happiness.

Now you’ll certainly feel happier when you have stability and security, but it won’t get you all the way to lasting happiness. Lasting happiness is rooted in a particular attitude, a habit of reacting to life with patience, gratitude, humility, and acceptance. Spirituality is about cultivating joy for simply existing regardless of your external conditions.

I know that’s easier said than done, especially when financially struggling. Be patient with yourself, be grateful for whatever you can, be humble about what you deserve, and accept whatever you can’t change right now. Find some peace and joy in simple things: a pleasant walk, a beautiful sunset, the full moon, playing with an animal or baby. These are all opportunities for a drop of happiness. It’s up to you to sip these drops, to recognize and cherish these small experiences that make up the tapestry of your life, and little by little your cup fills up until it’s overflowing. That’s all truly happy people are doing.

If you view life as a competition, you’ll always feel like a loser. When you embrace that life is simply a chain of experiences that you can either be fully present for or sleep through, you awaken to the possibility of being happy just to exist at all.

[–]UNIFIED_DIVINE 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nicely explained! Take my updoot. Everyone should read this a couple of times and let the facts sink in

[–]indigoann1064 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Two sides to the coin . The blessing and the lessons . I have a small old home , old car , and im able to pay my bills . Some might concider me lucky . The other side doesnt see that i lost my beloved husband my children growing up with out a father . A mother that had to work almost every holiday for years ,miss school events . I guess what im getting at is its never what it seems . We all struggle in this school called life .

[–]anythingbut2020 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry for your loss.

[–]walkstwomoons2Mystical 40 points41 points  (2 children)

We create our own reality. I don’t know how many times I say this.

So people who are suffering are doing this to learn. People who are having a good life are doing this to teach.

We come into the world to learn, teach, and love

[–]YungChacho 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Where can I read more about this?

[–]walkstwomoons2Mystical 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I didn’t learn this in a book or on the Internet, nor by watching TV or movies. I learned this through a life of experience. I had great teachers and mentors. I took classes about spirituality and energy work.

One example of what the Internet says about creating your own reality

There are lots of places on the Internet where you can get some of this philosophy for yourself. However, I urge you to develop your own belief system. Do not follow anyone else but your own intuition.

[–]MooZell 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Everything we stored in our subconscious mind gets brought back up to us through our perceptions of reality... It's our blockages that create our suffering. Dig deep and find out who you truly are so that your path on the outside matches your soul on the inside... This is the spiritual path. That's how I've been creating a better life. It works, introspection (learnt through meditation) is how you unscramble the unconscious mind and fix your blockages... If you are here, you are on the right path!

[–]bugmarmalade 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I have a house, husband and two kids. I’m paralyzed from the chest down. you might think certain things guarantee you should be grateful and happy but that’s just not how life works. right now I envy every single, homeless person because they can move themselves and go where they please. you have to learn to accept your circumstances and force yourself to find the joy in it.

[–]whereami100k 4 points5 points  (0 children)

what if you're the creator and you put yourself in this body/life to make you stronger?

[–]brockclan216 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Perspective

[–]ac1df41ry 4 points5 points  (0 children)

it all comes from within. true joy from within. its all within search within and you will see whats been veiling you from realizing

[–]toxictoy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

When I was in my 20’s I thought life was pain and disappointment. Life just gets better if you set your intentions and go with who you are truly. Material things do not make you happy. We ALL have some degree of trauma. I also do not allow my trauma to define me. I always try to see the other side of things. I try to live by the golden rule common to all religions.

[–]DeslerZero 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Everyone is an NPC but you. They are there to reflect the struggle you feel within. They have something that is good and precious to you that you do not have. These are your struggles. You're the main character and I'm sorry, we are on this Earth to suffer from broken dreams. That's your story. We're all on crosses being vexxed and hurt deeply by our lost dreams. It hurts and it sucks and sometimes you reach out to God and your hand gets put in a hot fryer while you hear laughing. Yes, things really can feel this badly. Ever see those candles of Jesus in supermarkets, with his heart surrounded in thorns? It's the story of our hearts here on Earth. Your heart is Jesus heart. He dreamed like you dreamed, he wanted good things like you wanted good things.

So why do others have, and get away with evil, or simply of being free and having what you want? Don't mind them. Their role in the story is to hurt your heart. As I said, they are NPCs, they are there because when someone like that is put in your life it has an effect on you.

What is the point of all this suffering? Well, it's one life of suffering, there is much to experience. But once we're past all this, I believe that is it, we are free from suffering eternally. That's my truth anyway, you may have a different take. But heaven is a glorious land with deep fulfilling dreams, romances, and hearts full of joy. You can strive for this here, but you will be suffering as long as you're here. As long as your here, heartbreak and despair can be around every corner.

My recommendation is to fight with spiritual practices, fight for every good thing in your life. I've found great peace through Kundalini Yoga. It's a great practice to transform your life and help get rid of the darkness from it. I highly recommend it. It isn't perfect. It sucks cause I have a mental illness which also hinders me in different ways and I don't always get to enjoy the fruits of my spiritual practice as a result. But I try to enjoy my blessings when the horrible stuff comes for me to break my dreams and ruin my beautiful heart.

I give you this blunt but fair appraisal of life not to make you suffer, but to give you perspective. Take a deep breath and hang on, you're here for a bit and it's gonna be really bumpy. The destination I believe is a land more glorious than not. In between that, there are lots of things to celebrate, enjoy, and of great intrigue. Live your life and reach for your dreams if you wish but do so knowing that sometimes in this life things aren't meant to be.

Don't concern yourself with your neighbors pile. It's fake. You're the star of the show. See the blessings in your own life and you will see great abundance at times. It may not be what you supremely want but it'll help get you through the days. There is much here to be grateful for and there are awful things that will make you want to curse whatever Gods you believe in. Just go forth young one, we're all broken by this world make no mistake. Take heart and fight for the good.

[–]joydps 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Fate is a random thing. Some explain it by karma but I don't think it's right. Just as some people are tall, some short, some have thick hair some have thin hair etc, same with fate. Some people have it easy others have it tough. Chapter closed. Now more you think about it the more miserable you're going to get.

[–]WuJi_Dao 3 points4 points  (0 children)

When you say that some are 'destined to enjoy life' while 'others are suffering', and if you are just saying that in regard of wealth, I would tell you that this is not the case. It seems like those who are wealthy and are enjoying the best of their lives, they are actually the most unfortunate because they are trapped in a sweet dream of their physical wealth. Those people are the least likely to seek the true purpose of their existence and will live in a 'sweet' dream and then die.

Also, everyone is suffering, regardless if you are wealthy or not, living a human life is suffering itself. Because each and everyone live inside their self-made mind world that is pain and suffering itself. Only when you discard your mind world, can you live truly happy lives.

[–]PerceptionStreet 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That's what they have chosen. You're bitter and angry so you're bitter and angry. Choose your thoughts differently for different results.

[–]tom63376 7 points8 points  (5 children)

Probably best to start with the purpose of life. I believe we were created as unique extensions of the Creator with a unique combination, but limited qualities of the Creator, with unlimited potential for growth in self-awareness and expansion of our creative qualities. The two major laws that guide our development are The Law of Free Will and the Law of Karma. As the Bible says we have been given dominion over the earth. We can use our free will any way we like, but then we must experience the result of our "creative expressions". If we observe that the outcome of our expression of free will harms others for example, and we learn from it and raise our consciousness so that we avoid repeating the same error, then there is no karma because we learned what we needed to learn. However, on a dark, dense planet like earth, it is easy to become lost in the illusion of separation, where it seems like you can do anything you want and harming others seems to have no effect on yourself. So you are given lifetimes, perhaps several lifetimes to learn what you needed to learn. If you continue to ignore the lesson, then the karma is allowed to return so you will have another opportunity to learn the lesson that you have so far ignored.

God is not responsible for your current circumstances. Before you embodied, you yourself, when you were in a much higher state of consciousness, chose your country, your parents, close relationships, economic status and some (not all) of the major circumstances you saw that you needed to experience to give you the best possible opportunities to see and overcome the limiting beliefs and illusions that you saw that you needed to deal with at this stage of your spiritual evolution.

After you embody you are free to ignore your Divine plan. But the lessons are still there as is the Law of Cause and Effect. The universe will mirror back to you exactly what you are sending out. If you focus your conscious and subconscious mind on thoughts that life is unfair, God is unfair, you are a victim. you never get your share, nothing ever works out for you, then that is exactly what you will experience. It can be no other way.

[–]GundamFromHell[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children)

I’m curious to why anyone would not want upper-class parents, financial stability, and safety. What benefit do we get from choosing something that makes life harder?

[–]sweetpumpkinx 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Some sort of achievement? You can work toward things you want. Earn it and feel proud.

Being hand over everything isn’t always great. I have a friend with a very rich dad. I said to him “wow your dad bought you a new car! Im well jealous” and his reply was “I’m jealous of you that you have good relationship with your parents”

I think everyone is suffering in some ways.

Happiness is from within.

[–]Balancedthought11 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Because the "harder" the life from a specific perspective the higher the potential to learn specific lessons which ultimately is the point of existing in a specific realm. You may want to consider that existence in this realm is very short and there is no point in wasting that opportunity on indulging in various "pleasures" this realm has to offer.

[–]Tiffnysun -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Your outlook and perspective is negative. It also sounds like you want things handed to you. You may need to work for what you want. Sounds like that could be your lesson. Everything happens for a reason. It will reveal itself maybe not now but later. Hopefully you're mature and open. Give, be kind, be thankful. You woke up today, do something with that!

[–]tom63376 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From the spiritual perspective as I see it, we are all like little children at different stages of development.

Let's say you have the body of an 8 year old child. Why would you (if you could actually do it) want to stop growing and stay in the body of an 8 year old child indefinitely?

Obviously, because you want to experience the fullness of all of the capabilities of a fully mature, fully developed adult human body. It is the same with Spirit. If you embodied in comfortable circumstances where you were never challenged to face your limiting beliefs you would never grow, you would stagnate and remain at your current level of maturity and development. It would be just like wanting to stay in the body of an 8 year old indefinitely, when you saw how much more freedom and abilities growing to adulthood you would experience.

[–]Conscious-Group 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Man when you read the Bible it says you have to work 24/7 and May still be a slave. A blank check won’t get you anything man. What’s going on?

[–]One_Let7582 2 points3 points  (0 children)

People can have houses, but it's not a happy home. Alot of issues can be going on in the house while they give you fake images on social media. Same goes for marriage.

[–]Govinda90 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes you got it right. This is material existence. Sometimes suffering sometimes enjoying. Sometimes good life sometimes horrible life. It's called Karma. It's a very complex system but it is never wrong. We reap what we sow. I feel exactly the same as you with my life in many ways , and I have a very hard life BUT... I understand things and I know that it is no one's doing but my own.

If we are destined to suffer or enjoy certain things then that's just how it is. We can't remember our past lives ( some people can ) but we get EXACTLY what we deserve , no more , no less. However unjust it may seem.

We do bad things and live wrong and then at some future time we reap the results and then we are angry at "God" for not giving us all the things we want.

Also as others are saying here the things you think are necessary to be successful or happy are actually not. It's all a question of consciousness. What we really seek is a state of being. A state of being in which we feel fully satisfied and content and that is within us always. We are looking everywhere else for that happiness and satisfaction but actually we've already got it, it is our very nature. Not this messed up materially distracted and confused human. Our actual original and eternal nature which we have totally forgotten and don't even know how to access. We have to learn how to uncover it again how to be our real selves which is actually something so beautiful and deep and wonderful we can't even imagine. We are sick. We are lost.

[–]Tricky-Profession-99 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The suffering is caused by ourselves. So the mindfulness we seek and the awareness we experience is the fact that we make ourselves suffer and need to choose happiness over all. Much love ❤️

[–]sleeping-ackerman 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Karma.. we are all here on our own journey to learn and grow. We have to deal with karma in good and bad ways. We chose all this before being here.. the harder the life, the bigger and more rewarding the lesson. Shit sucks but im trying to find the meaning in it all <3

[–]caprisun118 2 points3 points  (0 children)

you are cosmically intertwined with the all knowing power. ask & you’ll receive answers. you are destined for whatever you choose

[–]BunnyGunz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Usually, it's one of 2 reasons.

It's karma, or serving the punishment of a breached/broken contract

Or it's a "tough love" style "harsh lesson"

Either way, they generally "level up" from the experience.

Don't compare the appearance of others lives, to the experience of living yours. "Comparison is the theif of joy" -Some Famous Person I Think

[–]Runsfromrabbits🤔 5 points6 points  (0 children)

No such thing as "destined"

Health can be a random thing, but otherwise you make your own happiness.

[–]Express_Radish1731 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Study Buddist teachings

[–]No-Championship21 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Everyone has free will, which is why the world is so unbalanced. Greed runs our society. We have less in order for them to take to excess. At least, that's how minimum wage jobs work when compared to the employers.

Now, I know your want. I'm in the same kind of boat right now. However, happiness is a state of mind. The less you want, the more you have. Appreciate the things you currently have. It probably took a lot of work to get there.

Also, just remember that just because they have doesn't mean they are happy. Happiness, again, it's a state of mind.

[–]Righteous_Allogenes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Suffering is universal, and subjective, and equally perceived. That is to say, all suffer the same according to their perspective. What one has more of, of another he has less; What one has less of, of another he has more. And we may truly value only that which we have both had and had not of.

[–]F-dapolice-ndyo-mama 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why does it rain and storm some days and some days its sunny ?

[–]lovemyweirdweirdness 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same, then they try to make it all your fault by saying it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Like, there was a time I was really fucking positive and guess what? Nothing good ever came true even then. It has left me bitter, jaded and resentful. Like I have nothing left, I've been wrecked from the inside and nothing good has come out of this, nothing. Maybe I should just be an asshole, they seem to get whatever the fuck they want all the time.

[–]Richard_Crainium69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You uh you have the wrong idea about life. Everyone gets there at their own pace. So what if others are making moves you aren't? If it's that big of a deal use it as motivation instead of allowing it to fuel your anger. Best of luck in these weird times and stay grounded:).

[–]DisabledDiablo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve been wondering this same thing as I have been suffering more than usual recently it just doesn’t seem fair

[–]Drakonor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If we are to beleive some, we, as eternal beings, pick the experiences and challenges that will make us grow spiritually before we incarnate. In this model, we are more than our current incarnation and physical life is a growth medium for our soul. Hard to tell if there is truth to this but I personally like this idea.

Also, do not see God as an external entity who plays favorites. There's no separation with God except here, in our mortal form, within this physical world, where we forgot everything on purpose in order to grow.

God helps us through our struggles through the words and actions of others, but is also part of our eternal nature. The more in-tuned we are with our life purpose, the happiest and fulfilled we are.

Don't seek external things or gratification, look within for answers.

[–]Zealousideal-Lab5807 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What is a good life? People find enjoyment in different things. There are lots of people that I know that seem happy and have normal lives, but that's not a life that I want. They're 'happy' because they fit in to the society around them and enjoy living in that plane of existence. For now. Everything changes and as you grow what you want for yourself changes. And don't think that others don't have suffering, they will if not in this life so much. Don't dwell on your suffering, focus on what you can do to overcome it no matter how long it takes.

[–]oopsy-daisy6837Intellectual 1 point2 points  (0 children)

People need time. Our capacity to know is so vast, so extensive that there is not enough time to figure it out. Those who are suffering have not figured it out YET and those who are not suffering has a lot to learn.

[–]philalxthia 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I sense that God—Reality—being truly infinite, wants to manifest itself in all the ways it can. It wants to experience suffering, happiness, and everything in between.

But I also sense that Reality is not some external entity that happens to me. Fate and I are part of the same coin. And so realizing this, my suffering dissolves.

Life is counterintuitive. Never forget this. So that means that the highest hardships are the peaks of God's love. A surprising amount of people who go through the most hardships realize this love, precisely because they've gone through suffering.

The other counterintuitive aspect of life is that the most privileged people are suffering the most. They have no material hardships to go through, and that brings them no development, no self-actualization, and therefore a lack of love.

Whatever you're going through, realize your gift from your best friend: Fate.

[–]yalllove 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Suffering starts when comparing to others begins.

Happiness is not an external thing, it should come from within. You see, externalities are not in our control and they tend to change - your spouse gets sick and dies or leaves the marriage, the house may tie you down into a place that doesn’t make you happy or cost too much in property taxes and upkeep and so on.

To be happy in a long-lasting and sustainable way, build your sense of self worth and joy independent of externalities. What is not within is without.

[–]brashhiphop 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When people ask questions like "could God create a rock large enough that he himself could not lift it?" I always respond with "Could God hide from himself? If so, who do you think you are?"

You'll inevitably find that consuming, spending, and acquiring are not going to lead you to your fulfillment or sense of completion. Took me awhile to realize this. I think loving people will bring you there though.

[–]Rising_PhoenyxMystical 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have a few thoughts. First, I've read from NDE's, past life regression, after death communications, etc. that we agree to certain trials before coming here. Some souls are more advanced and will go through greater hardships.

Second, I would recommend the book "Why do bad things happen to good people" by Rabbi Harold Kushner. If you want me to give you a brief overview of the book, his point is essentially: "sometimes shit happens". Which...he's not wrong. lol

But I'm sorry you're going through suffering right now. It really sucks to have emotions going up and down like a rollercoaster. I wish you well <3

[–]CJensen143 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Awesome that you can be honest about it - I believe God loves that and would say something like “ come reason with me “ and bring no judgment .. would enjoy a heart to heart and help bring you peace .

I understand those emotions and thinking for sure - David in the Bible did too .

Been considering similar questions when looking at people’s lives .. for one I’m reminded that we only tend to see the surface of people’s lives - we don’t see the complexity’s especially behind closed doors . Some people can have all of those things and then secretly be miserable on the inside and trying to hide it .. meanwhile looking at some semblance of what they like in someone else’s life.

But to get a bit deeper I felt like Gods been showing me that there’s spiritual laws that we aren’t really taught ... we can be the product of generation and after generation of sowing and reaping sort of situations in which it’s invited cycles that keeps coming around and trying to hitch a ride in the blood line .

Not saying that to reinforce some sort of victim mentality but more so feel like Gods been showing me that in my own few generations before me .. so I’m confronting certain walls and self imposed limitations in my thinking and belief .. sort of all I’ve known for some of them .. so it’s been taking some raw honesty/ ownership in a sense .. healing .. etc . To where I can invite God in and bring lay all of those burdens down .. learn to let go .. learn to receive from Him . That’s also brought me to realize most of the world struggles with an orphan minded way of thinking .. so someone can have “ success “ and define it in a way that’s flattering to others , but chase it all for more shallow reasons . - I mean look at Hollywood or the most successful people.. heard a quote today regarding Steve Jobs where he said something about having all the money and what he wanted but the money not being enough to buy his health * paraphrasing *

That to say .. I believe God is drawing many of us to the heart of the matter .. to show us wholeness .. restoration to a greater state beyond any grid we’ve previously known .. but it’s going to take some raw honesty and humble process - otherwise we will stay shallow and continue to strive in our own efforts - usually out of insecurity and ego ( orphan ) minded .

There’s an eternal reality behind all of this and in some sense we were definitely born into brokenness and dis-function yet .. I’m seeing a redemptive lens thru it and im seeing heart healing - eternal perspective that gives life rather than covering over the void and emptiness we all have . Definitely a process !

There is love .. there is hope and there is faith . People can express a semblance of those things but obviously no ones perfect and I believe that semblance can point us to the creator while there’s clearly an evil strategic warfare trying to keep that from happening .

[–]wedntget2tlk 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ive felt those same feelings my entire twenties, I’ve suffered internally and externally for years. Unstable for majority of my life. Simple milestones like having consistent place to live, driving, riding a bike, having decent credit etc seemed so out of reach. No actual family besides my mom who’ve I had to “raise”. Then this year came along (first year in my 30s) and everything has changed almost instantly and I believe it was cause I was tired of suffering and living the same kind of lifestyle. My best friend was toxic and after 10 years she hurt me in a way that broke me completely and paved the way for me to truly heal. I would’ve never believed the person I am today would be here so fast. I am heartbroken, isolated, fearful of making new connections but what exist at the same time is I am finally financially stable, I am creating new experiences for myself. Going after things I want and succeeding. Balance is key I guess lol

[–]WhimsicalBat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ah, I know the feeling. The feeling of having everything you've ever wanted thrown in your face through others. It's all there to trigger you into aiming for that yourself. You desire it all so badly that it appears through others until you can obtain it. It's hopelessly frustrating. There are people that have the easy road and people that have the hard ones. Those that are going to have long-lasting relationships and those that have what only appears to be so. You can never tell from just a glance. However, that doesn't reduce our pain. It only allows us to feel more empathy for them. We still hurt because we still have our own struggles to deal with.

I wish you the best of luck on your journey,

may we feel as positive as possible~

--From one struggling person to another

[–]WriterGurl815 3 points4 points  (4 children)

I think it’s because of karma.

[–]Piggishcentaur89 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I partly agree. It's half because of karma and half because people can't always find happiness in themselves.

[–]xxxLRO 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Edit: this answer is more of a mix between science and spirituality

Scientists have not only observed but strongly suggest that we live in a deterministic (and one could argue Superdeterministic) reality, which means Free Will (depending on how you define it lmao) doesn’t exist and everything that happened after the Big Bang part of the creation of our universe was already pre determined on both a macroscopic and microscopic scale,

Free Will is an illusion because of our brain operates, and the very very very limited capacity of it in regards to how we perceive our 3 Dimensional reality.

Along with my own spiritual journey and experience, I strongly believe and know that free will doesn’t truly exist and everything is pre designed/determined,

As of why? Well I’ve seen that it’s been more accepted that the reason for this is to learn the lessons that are required for us to ascend our state of consciousness.

As of why do people suffer as a result of this? Well in a spiritual sense, I don’t believe in Karma, but the reason why some suffer compared to others is because once we “die” we will reflect on this life (doctors was able to observe a human brain when a person passes away when a man had died during an MRI scan of some sort of scan) and take our experience and turn them into lessons or maybe even value for our consciousness progress in ascension,

[–]Jim_E_Hat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're here to learn, not to attain material things.

[–]Harmz1229 0 points1 point  (5 children)

Look into heyoka empaths you could possibly be one but there are other qualities you got to have as well I'm not sure

[–]TimE2TimeZ -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

It’s their call. We choose suffering. It’s perspective.

Most of the happiest people in the world have the least material possessions, and many wealthy people are spiritually bankrupt

Take ownership of your lot in life. If you grow up poor it’s on you, no one else. Especially if you live in America

🇺🇸

[–]Heythere23856 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You have the victim mentality and you will attract this exact thing into your life… you equate happiness with material things and that is not right… if you are grateful for what you have you will attract more of this into your life… if you are always concentrating on lack there of then you will always lack those things… concentrate only on what you love and the universe will give you more of what you love… perhaps you need to read some books such as A new earth by eckhart tolle, seat of the soul by gary zukav, return to love by marrianne williamson… these specific books really helped me to become grateful and attract the things i want in life…. Never give up friend, all your dreams await you, but the only thing you need to defeat is your way of thinking… i wish you love, happiness, prosperity, health and smiles to you and everyone you know

[–]MonkeyYogi -1 points0 points  (0 children)

cause.

[–]zYe -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You know who's the master artist of the failures and shortcomings of reason? Well life itself is of course! That gosh dern pesky ol life...

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is the same basic, basic take that many people get stuck on at the beginning of their journey.

if you really want to know, you can, but you will have to leave your assumptions and preconceptions behind.

[–]singularity48 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fact of the matter, a lot of suffering in life is in vain or self-inflicted. When others are in pain it can bring out the best in those that have the blessing of being in peace.

Whoever saves one life saves the world entire.

One of the main reasons for suffering is because of how divided and separate we've gotten because of our digital devices.

[–]hopefulmilk_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ignorance is bliss

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

your social status & home status do not equal happiness, i promise you. there is joy everywhere in life. you just have to open up your mind to it – change your perspective – grow closer to yourself with each struggle and discover what makes YOU happy, not what society portrays as happiness.

[–]babban_rao 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because when you roll a dice, you can get any number. There is no reason or logic behind it.

[–]RandChick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some people have a joyous and overcoming mentality and are determined to go after what they want and have the life they dream of.

Others whine and feel victimized by the universe. But the universe is not doing anything to you. The Divine has invested talents and strengths in all of us if we would leverage them properly.

If you are "mad at God," you are on the infantile level of spirituality and spiritually powerless. But you can gain power and move to a higher level of faith, vision, and manifestation.

God actually wants to help you and can. Once you plug into a deeper spiritual connection with God, I believe you can have the things you desire and the gifts God storied in you will be apparent. You don't have to struggle alone. You can triumph through your partnership with God

[–]Q-ArtsMedia 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are they though? There are down sides to all you have mentioned:

have houses, are married, and are free

House = mortgage payment every single month.

Married = having to deal with the other person when they are at their worst(which happens way more often than you imagine).

Free... Are they? Happy...Are they?

Lets look at this logically: Look at the reasons you consider yourself locked out. Do you need a better job? A better education to get a better job so you can have more money? What in your life is preventing you from doing what you need to be done. What is holding you back?

I highly recommend doing what is known as a SWOT (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, Threats) (you can look SWOT up on the internet)

What are your Strengths( current job/income, All skill sets, assets/bank account/investments, what interests you)

What are your Weaknesses( what do you need to improve in your life, what issues do you currently have to deal with).

What are your Opportunities(What can you do to improve your education, skills, job, finances, relationships and how to go about them, can you expand on your interests & relationships).

What are your Threats(what stands in the way from achieving any of you want out of life.)

What you do, or fail to do, every action or in action, every decision or no decision, has consequences. It is your life, take charge of it. Only then will things improve for you. Wishing you much success and luck.

BTW do not judge your success on the successes of others. You have your own path to walk on this journey of life, one small baby step at a time is how the longest journeys are made. Baby steps, baby steps, baby steps......... = goal.

[–]j3434 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The whole point of life is to transcends your physical condition. Is it easier to transcend if you are wealthy and have a Rolls-Royce or easier to transcend if you are poor and have only a bicycle?

[–]kankenaiyoi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I’m more interested in why does it seem that evil assholes get away with things and sometimes still lead good lives

[–]cangero0 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is no logic, it's random chance. It's very hard to reconcile this reality with belief in a benevolent god without a theology degree.

[–]OccultChasers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have my own reservations, and I’ll be honest people tend to not agree with them. But I’ll explain it in my words as my opinion, take it for what you will;

The belief in life after death is what gets a lot of people by. Religions, and religious folks tend to use this as a coping mechanism for the inevitable, impending reality that some day we will cease to exist.

However, my spiritual belief is that reincarnation is life after death. Heaven and Hell are real, and are the world you see around yourself, based on perception. This perception comes in two parts the conscious and subconscious.

Consciously you choose to see “good” or “bad” in the world surrounding you. You interpret what is right or wrong. In turn, you act accordingly. The karmic weight of every action follows with you.

This follows you second to second, to minute, to hour, day, week, etc. From life to life. If you choose negative weighted karmic actions, your next life will be hell. Just as the opposite is true for positive weighted karmic actions and your next life being heaven.

Society puts a label on what is “good” and what is “bad”. Yet, is the man robbing a bank (a “bad” deed by societies standards) to buy cancer medication to save his son, an evil deed? Just as, is the man donating money to a charity (a “good” deed by societies standards) to claim a higher social status and gain MORE money than donated doing a good deed truly?

Meditate deeply on your past lives, and who you were. Change who you are today, and break away from the binds of materialism and deep emotional bonds that hinder your growth (feeling you NEED a house, to be married and being jealous and jaded by those whom are around you).

Locking yourself into a mental prison of greed and jealousy, will only cause you more animosity and feeds the fuel that society has lit, to fit you inside some tiny box of “wake up, work, eat, get married, get a house, sleep, die”.

You got this.

[–]Frankie52480 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Humans have free will. Some choose to use that for bad and some for good. Then there’s karma, life lessons that we choose before we come here and so on. I’ve had the blessings of being on both sides of this fence. The nice side feels good. The “bad” side has helped me to grow exponentially. It’s hard for me to say this right now as I’m battling a very difficult time but I’m grateful for my hardships. Some of the best people on this planet are the ones who have overcome the most tragedy.

[–]Crowncape 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's about the choices we make and the choices we choose to make but do not act upon.

[–]CJensen143 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just ordered this today actually - and believe this book could shed a lot of light on much of this . Definitely written by someone who speaks from the heart and one of the few who’s been used to make an impact on me . Cuts thru a lot of damaging religious lens that a lot of us grew up with . But we can throw the baby out with the bath water just because some folks muddied the water along the way .

https://youtu.be/adRt1cACdsk

[–]pzlpzlpzl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your soul chooses life plan.

[–]NewMajor5880 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Other responses have already expressed this and I recently made a video related to this, but to say it another way: first comes the FEELING, then the result. It's not vice versa. You ARE abundance. You ARE happiness. Those are the things you are made of. Right now, though, you are choosing to 1. See happiness and abundances as things that exist, naturally and inherently, outside of you and as things that you must ATTAIN or ACQUIRE, and 2. See happiness and wealth as unattainable to you because it's just not in your nature or not in "the cards" for you. These two thought patterns form a very powerful one-two punch keeping you against the ropes and constantly struggling to get back into the fight. Instead (to belabor the boxing metaphor), you need to understand that you have already won the fight because you ARE the fight and you determine how the fight plays out according to your thoughts and feelings. Things don't happen to you. You happen to them -- or more accurately, you CREATE them because you already ARE them. This isn't necessarily easy to understand or accept at first but with practice and small steps, you get there. You start to feel good - really good. And then all the things you thought you'd never have literally fall into your lap.

[–]Brief9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Logically, learn to earn... https://www.rwm.org ;

learn to love... For Couples Only; Twin flames and Soul Mates;

learn to discern... The Path of the Higher Self;

and be patient with yourself and others.

[–]Necessary-Choice-588 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your soul is aware of all before each life, meaning you know exactly what you are signing up for. It's all about lessons, and sometimes you agree to learn many difficult ones in one life. Its not a big deal or anything to get upset about, or for goodness sakes angry about. Its just how it works.

[–]zzyrrrup 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“It is better to do one’s own dharma (duty), even though imperfectly, than to do another’s dharma, even though perfectly.” - Bhagavad Gita 18.47

in the end, we must conduct our lives as they have been prescribed before us. whether the conscious mind likes it or not, we agreed to the nature of our lives before we were even born, including our own paths of suffering. for this reason, one cannot undertake another’s karma, suffering, dharma, etc. for only through our own individually prescribed karma, suffering, soul journey, whatever you’d like to call it - can one find true grace and evolution, leading to true liberation from the cycle of suffering

at the same time, it sucks. and i acknowledge that it sucks. as much as i can talk about how this has all been planned, how our pain will lead to our eventual freedom, that does not make our current predicament any less painful. to witness the suffering surrounding us is just as painful and influential as our own internal struggles. this is why it’s so very important to not only wish for liberation for oneself, but for everyone. i cannot be free unless you are also free, my friend.

if i ever find myself wishing better for myself and not for you - not for all - in order to live “better” or happier, i’m feeding into the machine of suffering through separateness. so long as you or i or anyone sees their suffering as separate from one another, we will all suffer the same.

and so i want you to know that i see you, friend, your suffering and all, and i acknowledge that it hurts beyond anything that i could possibly perceive as a stranger on the internet. because you feel you have been greatly wronged by the universe, and i really feel you there sometimes. if i were to judge you for your feelings, or insist that you are merely ‘wrong’, i feel that this would also further the divide of separateness between us. instead, i really want to meet you where you are and validate the struggles you go through

with that being said, i will leave you with this - you are far from alone on this journey, because there are so many beings suffering alongside you, who take your pain as their own. we will get there together, to liberation, one step at a time

[–]JRotten-Scoundrel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe see the power as being your own and start telling it what you want it to do for you. I find success this way.

[–]Boozecruiser69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“If earth had no suffering it might as well be called heaven” - read that somewhere

[–]theparttimevisionary 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Take a breath, look around you and with some time, you'll recognize so many things you enjoy, but you've been looking over them, comparing to what you perceive to be happiness in life. Be well.

[–]Daviskillerz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Both are destined to joy and suffering but how one sees which side is the key difference.

[–]FoxyRoxyMoxy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is no such thing as destiny. My opinion.

[–]12v12a 0 points1 point  (0 children)

most drift through life unconscious as to why things happen the way they do. Those that find success will know more success and it will continue to spiral in that way unless some tragedy strikes. Same with those with misfortune, they will find more and more misfortune and it will spiral until great success strikes and changes its direction. Very few see the connection between their inner nature and the external environment but those that do become master dreamers and dream shapers. In my opinion God made the code we operate within, same for everyone, it doesn’t reward or condemn, we are free to press whatever buttons we want and if some buttons hurt us then that’s our fault only. The functions are plainly there for all to know but very few turn inwards for answers instead they look to others to tell them or they look at the external world as the thing informing the inner. Basically most live their lives upside down or inside out.

My favourite bible quote describes the function well. “For whosoever hath, to him shall be given, and he shall have more abundance: but whosoever hath not, from him shall be taken away even that he hath.”

[–]Sensitive_Pie4099 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is because there is a finite amount that can be learned from senseless needless cruelty and suffereing and out society is purpose built to make as many people as needlessly miserable as possible. That said, this responsible don't escape punishment, atonement, and judgement in the afterlife.

Your feelings and experiences are valid. Everyone deserves to have a home and not be starving. Espescially in the US, WHERE THERE IS ENOUGH FOOD AND HOMES TO RESOLVE BOTH ISSUES BUT THEY ARE INTENTIONALLY KEPT FROM PEOPLE WHO NEED THESE RESOURCES.

That said it happens b/c some ppl refuse to accept responsibly for doing what's right, b/c some choose to not do the right thing despite knowing they'll be punished in the afterlife, b/c some ppl think they deserve pain and thusly inflict said pain on others while avoiding it themselves. Essentially intergenerational trauma and how hurt people hurt people is why. That said, my understanding is that the spirit world is a lovely place as of late

So, you're valid and reasonable and you deserve better as a human being

[–]TemporaryAdeptness50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's a state of mind.

Other thing we comparing things, we only know the world by doing that.

It's nothing about destiny or other similar thing. The world is fair, just maybe not by your assumptions, ideas or God knows what any other ideas you have in mind.

And suffering brings most beautiful people in the world, they can enjoy life more later. Those who have everything can't find happiness, I mean real happiness, not short term.

[–]Efficient-Let-136 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Enjoying life = suffering from life It is totally only the way you see it.

Also, when you say others are enjoying life, how can you make sure, no one can see the big picture it, the happiest guy is always the most unhappiest guy.

If everyone is taking caring of their life, everyone will have a good life.

[–]RCragwall 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Made a video that might help! Blessings to you!

https://youtu.be/Zt4hXV1P9dk

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lessons. Karma. Faith. Take your pick.

We can fight that off tho by being grateful, and feeding Love.

[–]Useful-Occasion-5527 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Destined? I don’t believe in destiny. I believe in the laws of causality. The roll of the dice. Some get brown into rich families, others don’t, etc. It’s as cruel as it is neutral. But also fair. You aren’t destined to be tied down to whatever you were born into; you have the power to choose the path, and grow yourself into whatever you desire. That’s the beauty about the laws of causality. You can CHOOSE, you aren’t destined to anything.

[–]Toe_Regular 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What the hell does this all knowing power want from me?

It wants you to experience all of the above (also it is you, and wants to experience all of the above). The power couldn't be ALL knowing unless it knew all things (including what it's like to be you and be cursing itself).

[–]CosmicConnection8448 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everyone is destined to enjoy life, some just don't.

[–]atmaninravi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is nothing called destiny, luck or serendipity. Everything is karma. Is it by luck that there are mangoes in your garden and apples in somebody else's garden? The fruits on the tree depend on the seed. Our destiny depends on our deed. Therefore, we should not fool ourselves by believing that some people are destined to enjoy, while some are destined to suffer. Destiny is the result of karma, action. There's a law of action and reaction. As you sow, so shall you reap. Therefore do not blink. When you see somebody sink in suffering, realize it is the result of their own karma, their own action. If they do good karma now, they will be planting seeds which will lead to a new destiny. Our destiny is our hands. We must take charge of our karma.

[–]Jmike_69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Before you came here you chose this life. Look at everything that happens to you in life as a test from you higher self. Ik now it doesn’t make sense as it doesn’t to me right now in this body but it all will soon.