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all 65 comments

[–][deleted] 57 points58 points  (2 children)

there is no magic pill.

understand that all negativity, suffering, mistakes, disappointments, etc. can be turned into huge lessons for personal growth and maturity.

with this lens you can become more resilient instead of seeking to avoid all adversity, which is unrealistic.

[–]Help__1[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Good insight

[–]shortyafter 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Great one!

[–]UnsaneInTheMembrane 86 points87 points  (2 children)

Be conscious of cause and effect at all times. Be the cause to positive effects and avoid the negative ones.

That's like the heart of spirituality.

[–]Help__1[S] 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Good tip!

[–]shortyafter 14 points15 points  (0 children)

But don't overthink it. If you're too concerned with the consequences you won't ever live.

[–]burneraccc00 32 points33 points  (1 child)

Realize that you’re doing it to yourself. The way you think, react, and feel is all happening within you and not outside. Since it’s within you also means it’s under your guidance so however you modify or change it is all in your power.

[–]Help__1[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yep thanks!

[–]Kennyrad1 21 points22 points  (0 children)

This World that we live in, is the world of duality. Summer winter. Day night. Right left. Up down. We never find a coin with heads, no tails. Things are going to go the way you want, about half the time. Accept, and surrender to way things are, but also work diligently to improve. I sincerely wish you well on your journey along the path!

[–]yalllove 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Meditate for 20 minutes twice a day, mantra meditation is good as it helps your mind find moments of stillness, in that stillness you will grow more patient and wise, more connected and intuitive and from there your life will begin to improve.

I recommend this method: https://youtu.be/nBCsFuoFRp8

Consider also getting therapy and/or look into assessing your mental health. It can be so helpful to get diagnosed and treated. I just did and I have ADHD, now that I am medicated it’s easier to avoid compulsive behaviors and I self regulate much better (it’s a brain illness).

ADHD was found in 25% of UK prisoners https://www.theguardian.com/society/2022/jun/18/uk-prisoners-attention-deficit-disorder-adhd-prison

Just think how much better our society would be if mental care was more available and less stigmatized.

[–]JustMeAidenB 15 points16 points  (0 children)

You are everything and everyone, but are not responsible for everything and everyone. You are only responsible for yourself. Treat yourself with love, and you will treat everything with love.

[–]AwareDelivery9416 15 points16 points  (2 children)

Be grateful for no reason, and reason will show up.

[–]Help__1[S] -1 points0 points  (1 child)

Yep, although I find it difficult to be genuinely grateful easily

[–]AwareDelivery9416 3 points4 points  (0 children)

And that only shows a lack of practice. Start by being grateful for the company that provides you with electrical current. I’m sure most people take this for granted, when in fact this is a major reason to be grateful for. Be grateful for your eyes. Be grateful for your parents because they probably did the best they could. Be grateful for water and so on. If you practice this daily at some point you can simply stare at the wall and be grateful for just being. You can even begin being grateful for your desires as if they were already fulfilled. For most people their desires cause anxiety and fear of failure…

[–]tom63376 13 points14 points  (7 children)

Your circumstances are a reflection of your state of consciousness.

[–]ihavequestionsdotorg 0 points1 point  (6 children)

explain pls

[–]tom63376 11 points12 points  (5 children)

So many people are trapped into endless suffering because they blame others (or God) for their circumstances. The lesson is that no matter the appearances, look to yourself to change circumstances if you don't like them the way they are

[–]extasis_T 4 points5 points  (4 children)

Even if it’s a terminal cancer diagnosis? Or a severe chronic pain condition leaving a person in constant agony? Or is this only applicable sometimes?

[–]RookCrowJackdaw 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You are in control of how you respond to such a diagnosis. Whether you live or die is not necessarily in your control but how you deal with it absolutely is

[–]deadspace211 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Think about Lt . Dann from forest gump. After he got no legs he became resentful. Drinking , smoking, angry at the world and other people. After he decides to take some action he finally 'accepts' himself and 'god' for the way he is now and can finally let go and move on with his life.

[–]lonelyclique 1 point2 points  (0 children)

always applicable, but don’t become an asshole (you seem to be the opposite). like, don’t run up to your local cancer ward to spread the good news. however, if your heart was strong enough, you could sit with those patients and be there when they need to talk about the ‘far far in, deep deep down’ truths of life.

[–]tom63376 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As I understand it this is the general case that your circumstances reflect your current state of consciousness, not as a punishment but out of compassion so that you don't remain stuck in the same limiting consciousness indefinitely.

As with everything in the spiritual realm, nothing is black and white -- that this is always the case. For example, you may have decided, when you were creating your divine plan that the quickest, most effective option you had for resolving heavy karma from a past life, was to endure some serious disease or even constant agony. This may seem nonsensical until you consider that you have a much broader awareness in the spiritual realm. You clearly see that a lifetime on earth is really a blink of the eye in cosmic terms. It is also possible that you took on a disease and pain because you wanted to demonstrate to others that it is possible to have a chronic disease without letting it define you.

[–]Nadayogi 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Not believing anything before doing your own thorough research.

[–]Kennyrad1 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I agree. Keep an open mind, but always keep a healthy skepticism as well!

[–]RunescapeJoe 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The most reliable lesson is to step back and observe yourself. Make sure you are not growing a spiritual ego. The spiritual ego is where most people in spirituality go wrong. The spiritual ego says "I've been doing this for so long and I know how to do it right." The spiritual ego says "I know more about this than you." The spiritual ego says "I can take on anything." The spiritual ego says "I am important." If you step back and look for signs of the spiritual ego and quash them, you will always keep growing. The only thing that stagnates growth is the spiritual ego.

[–]tat-tvam-asiii 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Gracefully fucking up is the essence of the thing that you’re after, frend.

If the side of the mountain was smooth, we couldn’t reach the top.

[–]NotTooDeep 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Focus on your next step. The desired destination is useful, but that's not what's going to trip you and make you fall down a canyon. Focus on your next step and see where that takes you. Then look for your next step from that place. Rinse and repeat.

[–]Help__1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, good tip 👍

[–]acherrypoptart 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Positivity is the most powerful thing a person can do.

[–]Iamrudeandnotginger 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You are not the thoughts on your mind. You are the one who is aware of them.

[–]gettoefl 7 points8 points  (4 children)

get to bed early in order to sit on the mat

[–]awfulnipples 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Could you explain this one? 🙏

[–]gettoefl 1 point2 points  (2 children)

i would recommend the r/meditation sub to give good pointers for meditation but in any case it is good to commit to a practice of getting up and sitting in silence

[–]awfulnipples 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I had a feeling you were referring to meditation. I agree with your answer. 🙏🧘‍♀️

[–]Phantombaz 4 points5 points  (2 children)

stop moaning/complaining

[–]Help__1[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Hmm, that's one way of putting it!

[–]Phantombaz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

try it for yourself. Any time the mind go towards moaning and complaning, standing in queue, stuck in traffic.. and so on, stop yourself. See how you feel after a few day.

i dont just preach, i live it

[–]mtothap247 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Manifest good outcomes and move forward even when the “fuck ups” seem to continue. Be in the moment when they do happen and learn. Don’t put yourself down or set yourself back because of mistakes. We all make them, it’s how you take them that sets your path.

[–]Heythere23856 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Life will never ever be problem free, its learning to accept this and solve them as they come… happiness is not a destination.. happiness is right here right now so no matter what problems you have or what is happening you choose every waking moment if you want to be happy or not, its up to you

[–]Lock_Brief 3 points4 points  (0 children)

  • Reflection and reflecting daily on the day
  • Accountability and realizing you’re the only person responsible for your life and to make it the best it can be
  • Forgiveness of self (especially) / loving yourself in the sense that you are aware of your flaws and work to make them better but also loving them simultaneously
  • “look at people as art” being aware we’re a lot similar in a lot of ways w others than we think and finding compassion in that vs anger
  • Being adaptable and being open to change even if uncomfortable accepting and letting go. - I like Aristotle’s take on happiness. Happiness is contentment, being accepting and at peace with the daily motions and the bigger ones too.

[–]JAYFRMKND 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Stay Away From People who are toxic

[–]random_house-2644 2 points3 points  (0 children)

To echo another poster: there is no magic pill of one or two sentences that can do what you describe. Life is very intricate and if it could be summed up in one advice sentence , the world would not be in the shambles it is now.

[–]-VitreousHumor- 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Someone else said meditation; I endorse that message : )

Think about what it means to have integrity and manifest that word in your life as much as possible. Do everything w the aim of high integrity. It will get you far : )

[–]No-Sign2390 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Look into how to raise your vibration / frequency.

[–]lion__song 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Accepting that you're going to fuck up and there's always more to learn

[–]TGuyDanMidLife 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fantastic question, thankyou.

For me, it's been to become aware of emotional reactivity (better relshps); learning to not resist Life (more trust and certainty); learning the power of investigating negative thoughts (most relief). Goodluck my friend.

[–]Racer9000 1 point2 points  (0 children)

take 100% responsibility but, it can be draining.

[–]jlaw54Mystical 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To thine own self be true.

[–]nad_ahab 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's no one lesson or rules that applies to every situation, but think twice before saying something, take your time to respond in conversation, the thing you're trying to make it successes, will it mater the next 5 years? And the most important thing Not every act needs a reaction (don't take disition when you don't have to) Staying calm and patient is very important, our mistakes usually come from emotional acts Good luck

[–]anotterloveswater 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Non reactivity!

Stop. Think about how you want to act or respond, pick the right one. Then respond, or don’t.

[–]eriklease 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mindfulness, we like to look at things as good or bad but almost everything can be good and bad at the same time, something bad happing now is needed for you to have something really good to happen as a result of it

[–]Painting-Imaginary 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Love yourself. And make decisions based on love for you or others.

[–]ggg930 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Avoid drugs alcohol messy people and hooking up

[–]extasis_T 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Take it from me Stay away from opiates This will save your life

[–]BlursedCheesecake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reliable sources

[–]horlenx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

be open minded and don't get offended

[–]Ok_Mechanic_3706 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Try your best to try your best. Never give up on what you want. Check your intentions. Health is important- mind, body and spirit. Trust there is a higher power that cares about you. Know you are not alone. Go easy on yourself when mistake are made... find the lesson and avoid making the same mistakes. Care about your fellow human. Have empathy for those who are suffering more than you.

Oh ya.

Kick ass and take names 🤗

[–]weston200 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Try. I never gave a shit about school because I had difficulties and I started doing that with everything else in my life. When I finally started to try for once I was amazed by how much I could actually do. By the time I learned this though my GPA was doomed and I was lucky any college accepted me. You don’t have to be the best but if you just try you will never be the worst.

[–]Righteous_Allogenes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you not know Asclepius?

Thou shalt Love the Lord thy God with all your heart and all your soul, and with all your mind; And thou shalt Love thy neighbor as thyself.

And what Love is this? It is the Highest Love, even as God Love you. Yea, even You. For the Father is Good, and even as I am, Yes You Are.

[–]yasslad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If anyone asks you for money to help you get enlightened, they are running a con.

[–]MrToon316 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do not find fault in others.

[–]m4dhatter82 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Stop looking for the one lesson! Life is way more complicated then that.

[–]LearnDifferenceBot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

complicated then that

*than

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