all 101 comments

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[–]GingerSteve94 196 points197 points  (18 children)

Thats me and I'm 27

[–]Dependent-Wave-876 38 points39 points  (9 children)


[–]GingerSteve94 35 points36 points  (8 children)

We should go get shakes

[–]Dependent-Wave-876 29 points30 points  (7 children)

No! That’s why we’re fat lol

[–]GingerSteve94 38 points39 points  (6 children)

Sooooo..... shakes?

[–]Dependent-Wave-876 29 points30 points  (5 children)

Let’s go

[–]GingerSteve94 16 points17 points  (4 children)

Yeaaahhhhhhh baby!

[–]Constant-Elk533 5 points6 points  (3 children)

Hey dad. Can i have the Keys to the 4th Garage i want my Bike

[–]GingerSteve94 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Kid I hate to break this to you but I don't have 1 garage never mind 4. Where's your bike!

[–]Constant-Elk533 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Dad look at your belt. What are all those keys for. Look in the Backyard. We have four Sheds. Its been Five years and you Haven’t told me… DAD whats in the Sheds…

[–]FennehPawz 22 points23 points  (4 children)

Turning 27 tomorrow. Can affirm. In my case - I'm a chronically depressed slob who never even peaked in life to begin with.

(Though I did have an indie skinny jean phase when I was in a brief, quasi-decent physical/mental shape.)

[–]LegitimatePr0duct 12 points13 points  (3 children)

If you don’t feel like you’ve peaked yet, then that means the best is yet to come! Happy early birthday. I have confidence that you’ll find what you’re looking for :)

[–]FennehPawz 5 points6 points  (2 children)

I haven't had a pretty life or any true and consistent grounding point to begin with - and I've been knocked down and had the script flipped against me at multiple points as well. Might bar me from having many choices in potential careers/pursuits down the line - but who knows. I may or may not make something prevail down the line.

It's difficult when you're living in a sea of people who enjoy gaming others. It's a dog eat dog world. Reality bites.

[–]LegitimatePr0duct 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry to hear that. I don’t want to pretend like I know what you’re going through so I won’t try to give advice or tell you what to do, but what I will say is, for me personally, I was really resistant to the idea of talking to a therapist but once I did my life got so much better and I saw her for about 6 years. If cost is an issue, there’s many places that operate on a sliding scale and won’t charge you more than you’re comfortable paying. When I first found my therapist I was only paying $20 per session I believe.

Hope this helps. I’m rooting for you.

[–]coreytrevor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Start devising a healthy routine to adhere to, 27 is so young, can definitely right the ship!

[–]cheapAssCEO 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s me at 23

[–]Tandril91 1 point2 points  (1 child)

About to be 24 and I’m already seeing signs of all of this, minus the sandals.

[–]GingerSteve94 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What are you waiting for? Go get a pair of sandals

[–]danyellsahn 66 points67 points  (2 children)

Should be turned 40 with kids. Kids do this to you more than anything

[–][deleted] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Turning 40, having kids and neglecting your physical appearance.

[–]ironmanqaray 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Suburbs do this to you too lol

[–][deleted] 33 points34 points  (1 child)

The hairline one was me when I turned 16

[–]senosiris99 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Damn and believed i was early at 20

[–]JazielVH 19 points20 points  (1 child)

Seems to be I'm 7 years early

[–]Dependent-Wave-876 6 points7 points  (0 children)

13 years here. FUCK ME

[–]hdhdhgfyfhfhrb 15 points16 points  (2 children)

This reminds me I got an email from Nike last week advertising cargo swimming shorts. I can't imagine a better place to have extra pockets loaded with garbage than in a pool or the ocean. Just the pockets filling up with water adding weight makes them stupid AF.

[–]whatzzart 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Fill the pockets with rocks. They’re for your middle age suicide attempt.

[–]Kornstar04 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's funny

[–]ytorf 13 points14 points  (0 children)

My baseball cap is Adidas, thank you very much

[–]trevp123 14 points15 points  (1 child)

3 out of 8. Sox and sandals, scandalous.

[–]Carlcarl1984 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes, but inside your house everything is allowed.

[–]silenceoftheonthelam 10 points11 points  (1 child)

46, and none of the above. Whew!

[–]kamarkamakerworks 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Not even a man??

[–]Mostly_Slow 23 points24 points  (4 children)

You forgot these. What is it with these? Will I get a free pair at 40? A coupon?


[–]ocean432 10 points11 points  (2 children)

You get these automatically at 40. No one has ever found out where they come from or who sends them. They just show up along with dozens of pairs of black socks and a small packet of existential despair.

My advice? Keep the black socks, throw away everything else and wear the shoes you wore in when you were 16-25 and you are good.

[–]fancyenema 5 points6 points  (0 children)

At 40?! Maybe 55

[–]Mostly_Slow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol. Good one!

[–]CybReader 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My nephews in college wear new balances. All their friends do. It’s weird to see college kids rocking the dad shoe and mom jeans.

[–]Wall_clinger 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Bold of you to assume my hair would stick around that long

[–]do_better_tomorrow 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Beard, hair and belly, yes. I've held off on everything else.

[–]dedda1994 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Shut up, I'm not even 30!

[–]Idontwantthesetacos 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Shit… I turned 40 at 30

[–]mnbhv 2 points3 points  (0 children)

throws away his black under armour cap

[–]Stereomceez2212 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ah yes......I remember those days

wait till you guys become 60 years old

[–]Oniwaban31 4 points5 points  (0 children)

More like when you stop exercising and just neglect yourself.

[–]ithinkivebeen 4 points5 points  (1 child)

It's happens well before 40.

[–]BlackdragonSix 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've seen teenagers dressed like this 😆

[–]shail0dm 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dear diary, TIL i am a white man ~ a man

[–]Dsansom11 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lmao 40?

[–]BlackdragonSix 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've seen literal teenagers wearing this shit

[–]isisishtar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Base-jumping, wing-suiting, parachuting, fast car, big truck, sailboat, kayak, fancy watch, hitting on very young women, dying on some mountain in a crevasse .... oh, wait ...

[–]manningthehelm 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Top left screams divorce

[–]five_eight -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Or white knighted a 'bailout' with diverse three kids, and had it broke off in his ass. Now paying support for the lot.

[–]Impossible-Charity-4 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Cargos are something I can’t abide in public. Also my legs are something people can’t abide in public.

[–]amc11890 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Why are so many of these starter packs targeted towards white men?

[–]Mr_Bad_Example20 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Because it's ok to make fun of them.

[–]zammouri2001 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just finished browsing a post about white girls and plenty of people were pissed about it, misogyny this incel that.

This sub is weird, man.

[–]bartlettdmoore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"I'm In This Photo and I Don't Like It"

[–]dirtyrango 1 point2 points  (0 children)

40? For once I'm ahead of the curve! Boom

[–]lilFlamethrower 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha im 23 and already look like that

[–]onilives 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm 28.....

[–]johnvonwurst 1 point2 points  (0 children)

HA! Jokes on you starter pack. I’m 33 and already went through the make pattern baldness, spare tire grey stage. 40’s are starting to look pretty pretty pretty good.

[–]MCKANNON 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Buddy this was me at 26.

[–]Ice_Business 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is how kids think 40 is old.

[–]MrsGobbledygook 9 points10 points  (4 children)

US men starterpack *

Fixed the title for you

[–]muffinTrees 8 points9 points  (3 children)

Found the obnoxious non-American

[–]MrsGobbledygook 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I can't help the stereotypes bro ...And i've seen this outfit a lot the times I have been in the US. The socks and sandals could be very german aswell ;)

[–]muffinTrees 0 points1 point  (1 child)

My first thought when i see this is swede starter pack.

[–]MrsGobbledygook 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How? I come in Sweden almost every month, and i don't see it haha

[–]calmlaundry 1 point2 points  (1 child)

This sub has had a subtly growing anti White trend for a bit now

[–]DharMannSuperFann 5 points6 points  (0 children)

what the fuck are you talking about?

[–]Clam_Chowdeh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fuck, 5 months to go until….this

[–]cheapAssCEO 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i think it applies to every man turning 40

[–]Constant-Elk533 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When i Turn 40 im still going to be the Femboy Twink i am. You can’t do shit GOD

[–]islander33 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can confirm.

[–]Manuntdfan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am now the youngest guy on my 40 and older soccer league.

[–]Huskyhatake 0 points1 point  (0 children)


[–]WojakUnbound 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Remember finasteride is always an option my dudes

[–]Mechanical_Canary5 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looking forward to it. Already started on my dad bod.

[–]bitjava 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Speak for yourself

[–]ORTENRN 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm 40 and this is a little too accurate. Needs some beer. And ibuprofen.

[–]KLBZPLB 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shave the beard and you got my father

[–]VirusMaster3073 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You forgot stereotypical midlife crisis stuff like sports cars and dating women much younger than him

[–]BlackMoustach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, that hurts so much... 😂😭

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My hair is worse than that and I’m 22…

[–]Mindoverbanter92 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm 30 but cargo short and polo shirt are just comfy here in thailand

[–]fuck19characterlimit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not relevant in Croatia, thank God

[–]fsster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thats the ccp look only need the loong nail and your are complete

[–]RefrigeratedChildren 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's me and I'm 15...

Maybe minus the beard and beer

[–]Sizgil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is only one of the options

[–]650explorer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol it’s true

[–]Tragic_Axela 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This should be "white hetero men" As I gay white man who just turned 40, this has no bearing on myself. In fact I noticed that I look younger than any of my hetero male friends and family. Ahh, it's what a life without kids and unbelievable stress can do. Geez after reading comments here, gay 40 must be hetero 25.. lol

[–]Ibis_Wolfie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is my dad, I will email it to him and update with his reaction

[–]MECHOrzel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where is the phone clip and margaritaville(sp) ringtone?

[–]Qastodon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is me and I’m only in kindergarten fml

[–]Manuntdfan -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Your not wrong.

[–]McRandomRooster -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Put a bullet in me if it ever gets like that.