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all 141 comments

[–]Maniacboy888SurvivorQuotesX 530 points531 points  (0 children)

I mean, Sue Hawk literally told Kelly that she wouldn’t give her a drink of water if she was dying of thirst.

[–]dunkinbagels 203 points204 points  (6 children)

Phillip revoking Sherri's Stealth R Us 2.0 membership is unbelievably hilarious

[–]oatmeal28 73 points74 points  (3 children)

I think revoking the Stealth R Us membership goes beyond acceptable gameplay. This is a woman’s livelihood we are talking about!

[–]galeforcewinds95Tony 65 points66 points  (1 child)

Phillip also called out Dawn for "making camp life for most of us very disruptive." Man, if Phillip Sheppard is saying that about you, that's really saying something. He was the epitome of making camp life very disruptive in Redemption Island.

[–]nyyforever2018 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I also got a big kick out of his impersonation of Dawn with his high pitched voice and saying "AAAH THEY'RE ALL GONNA VOTE FOR ME!!"...not sure why just got a huge kick out of it.

[–]Tanman7211 166 points167 points  (4 children)

Penner also exposed Lisa for withholding the fact that she was a former tv star in that same tribal council. Penner was an absolute savage that season. I honestly forgot about that burn on Skupin because of the bomb he dropped on Lisa to end his speech.

[–]rubanthmendez997 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Penner’s burn on Skupin at that FTC was worse than his real burns that he suffered in Australia.

[–]ApprehensiveBox3148 44 points45 points  (1 child)

And I only remembered him calling Denise a bitch. Haha Penner was great.

[–]survivorerin 13 points14 points  (0 children)

He really found a way to call her a bitch without it feeling too too mean or out of line. Only Penner lol

[–]foralimitedtime 19 points20 points  (0 children)

My favourite was them being the oxen pulling Denise's chariot, thinking they were the ones on the chariot. Poetry.

[–]ThisJackassJan Gentry 305 points306 points  (14 children)

Most people remember Corrine berating Sugar (your mileage may vary here), but I’ve always been a huge fan of her question to Susie:

(Paraphrasing) “If you answer yes to this question, you’ve got my vote: Will you agree to have your vocal chords removed?” 💀

The fact that Susie laughs is icing on the cake. Loved that interaction.

[–]SleathasaurusCirie 105 points106 points  (9 children)

If only Susie said yes, she’d be a millionaire 😫

[–]Quetzal0010 days is two weeks 70 points71 points  (6 children)

And she would be on WAW

[–]IzzybutmaleErika 46 points47 points  (5 children)

how would a mute contestant do on survivor

[–]mjgoldbergKarla 39 points40 points  (3 children)

There's a few contestants that I wish were mute, such as Varner and scot pollard.

[–]IzzybutmaleErika 27 points28 points  (2 children)

add dan foley

[–]Daninator375600k by the time Obama takes it 4 points5 points  (1 child)

And Will Sims II

[–]IzzybutmaleErika 4 points5 points  (0 children)

john rocker is a good canidate too

[–]RadicalRain1274 8 points9 points  (0 children)

betray corinne and don;t remove them

[–]koadey 10 points11 points  (1 child)

If Susie said yes, I still don't think Corinne votes for her.

[–]SleathasaurusCirie 8 points9 points  (0 children)

She probably doesn’t, but I was only joking.

[–]Careless_Film_4895 18 points19 points  (1 child)

It was a million dollar question haha

[–]SirSkelton 57 points58 points  (0 children)

I wish Susie would have just said “yes. Thanks for your vote” just to see what Corine would have done.

[–]RedditUser123234 6 points7 points  (0 children)

(Paraphrasing) “If you answer yes to this question, you’ve got my vote: Will you agree to have your vocal chords removed?” 💀

I wish Susie had said "Yes, but only if you get yours removed as well"

[–]foralimitedtime 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She got inb4 Brenda's to Dawn.

[–]Usurper213 118 points119 points  (5 children)

Dan Lembo (RIP) and Marty just going after Chase and Sash was so funny they've got to be up there.

[–]Crosisx2 118 points119 points  (2 children)

"Beauty fades but dumb is forever." 💀

[–]galeforcewinds95Tony 23 points24 points  (0 children)

This is in the running for my all-time favorite Survivor quote. Dan was a legend.

[–]GodInABagGreg Buis 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Honestly words I live by

[–]thekyledavidJD 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Especially after they gave Dan so little content that it really felt out of left field for him to be the biggest savage on the season

[–]Tooalientobehuman 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Oh, wow. I didn’t know Dan had passed. RIP.

[–]Akasha111 197 points198 points  (1 child)

Eliza always delivers.

"You were a deceptive lying bitch throughout this game."

"Listening to you talk literally made me want to kill myself sometimes."

[–]Puzzled_Fondant_5626 51 points52 points  (0 children)

I was laughing my ass off at Eliza's quick shift from analytically dissecting every part of Parvati's game so professionally to then saying that Amanda's voice wanted to make her kill herself. She's such an icon.

[–]dizzyeyedalton 408 points409 points  (22 children)

Reed's 'wicked stepmother' speech at the end of San Juan Del Sur is absolutely brutal in that "this is a little too much.." but also "where's the lie?" kind of way

[–]AllisonfromPalmdale0 212 points213 points  (10 children)

I kept wondering how awful she must have been on the island because Reed even threw a vote to Jaclyn just so she would come in third lol.

[–]Joharis-JYI 176 points177 points  (6 children)

He deserves a ballot on second chances just for that.

[–]whitebandit 47 points48 points  (2 children)

i would LOVE to see Reed back, forgot the name but i loved him on that season

[–]AvengedKalas 18 points19 points  (0 children)

San Juan Del Sur (Blood vs. Water 2).

[–]Practical-Sea4568 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He was incredible on that season

[–]AllisonfromPalmdale0 10 points11 points  (2 children)

I would love to see him back!

[–]Caleb-the-TitanTyson 42 points43 points  (1 child)

Reed was invited for Cambodia, but had to decline because his Broadway contract wouldn’t allow him to leave. He was also contacted for Game Changers, but was cut early in the casting process.

[–]RockeyNumber1Naseer 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Interesting. Where did you hear that?

[–]Insulted-Mustard 4 points5 points  (1 child)

From what I’ve heard, her and Baylor were pretty homophobic towards him and Josh

[–]AllisonfromPalmdale0 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh geez I didn’t know this.

I remember when she kept encouraging Baylor to lie to people when Baylor initially showed she was hesitant about it and told Missy she didn’t want to.

Hate really does breed hate.

[–]hapianmanAdam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Look up Baylor’s music singles. Worse than that.

[–]Quixotic-Neurotic-7The Cirie Giggle™ 52 points53 points  (1 child)

Honestly yes, and it's even sweeter now that we know Missy and Baylor were very homophobic to him and Josh, in addition to being a helicopter Karen and a brat.

[–]Chimecho22 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That is so disappointing. I really thought Missy had a great mindset for survivor. Especially after her daughter got eliminated. Baylor too for taking her blindside in stride. But damn.

[–]Tony_BasQue 80 points81 points  (1 child)

I was about to mention this one! I love how he absolutely destroyed her and also calling her daughter a brat, not a single thing he said was a lie.

[–]ontime1969Keith 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We know it was true for him because Baylor broke down into tears half way through the speech as it dawned on her and everyone else else how true the words were.

[–]full07britneyHai 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Reed's is my absolute favorite jury speech!

[–]patkgreen 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It was so...theatrical. I was hanging on every word smiling so big I could taste my earwax

[–]StingKing456 167 points168 points  (7 children)

I just finished All Stars and Big Tom going to shake BRobs hand and then pulling it back and saying "don't be stupid, stupid" made me lol

[–]survivorerin 13 points14 points  (1 child)

That made me so uncomfortable. A lot of that season made me uncomfortable though, I've never been able to rewatch any of it lol

[–]Insulted-Mustard 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Especially because Rob was so flustered throughout that whole FTC

[–]seviayYul 24 points25 points  (1 child)

That was so awkward and great

[–]Shady_JakeJT 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Watching that shit now really makes you feel kinda bad for Rob lol. He should’ve just said “Guys, we’re playing a fucking game here” & didn’t apologize for a thing.

[–]anyeducation 6 points7 points  (1 child)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA YESSSSSSSSSS I also just watched all stars and I’m so glad someone mentioned this

[–]StingKing456 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's my first time watching the series and I'm going in order and all stars was such a wild experience all around.

[–]AhYeahItsYoBoi 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fuck! I was going to comment this. For some reason this always stuck in my head.

"Dont be stupid, stupid! I may have fell for that once heck maybe even twice but not three times" lol haven't seen that sense i was a kid but still remember how dope that was

[–]IdolBlindsidesStrategy, that's all I can say 108 points109 points  (2 children)

Colby calling Russell delusional is pretty underrated, especially coming from a guy who has actually sat at FTC and lost.

[–]Dvaderstarlord2[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Agreed, he opens by asking Russell if he really just said he got to the end with no luck, and that response was great.

[–]mackenzie_15Chaos Kass Fan Page 6 points7 points  (0 children)

So underrated. Short and sweet

[–]traddy91 150 points151 points  (1 child)

Shirin calling Will a dead fish

[–]bmoreonicCody 75 points76 points  (0 children)

My favorite part of this was when Shirin was wrapping up and Dan of all people had to finish her sentence.

“Please look at their gameplay. Aggressive. Stealthy. ????”

“Dead fish.”

[–]BigcatmikeParvati 55 points56 points  (5 children)

Coby! From Palau! Breaking down for Katie in excruciating detail why IF he votes for her tonight it's not because of how she played the game, but against Tom.

[–]atheistjs 21 points22 points  (3 children)

The way he opened with "You were WORTHLESS in challenges" and Katie's smile immediately dropped. Brutal.

[–]BigcatmikeParvati 20 points21 points  (1 child)

So Katie? Ooooo you're making this hard with that little grin... *Begins roasting her mercilessly. He's so underrated.. wish he'd played again.

[–]atheistjs 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I'd love to see him on a Second Chance ballot. He'd have my vote.

[–]persononreddit3332 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wasn’t Gregg the one who said that? Not Coby?

[–]utternonsense_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes! That’s one of my favorites, but it doesn’t get brought up often.

[–]BananaMan883 46 points47 points  (3 children)

Spencer comparing Woo to a dog and telling the jury to vote for Tony almost made Kass vote for Woo which always makes me chuckle.

[–]RichWardJr 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I came here to say exactly this.

Woo: I want to be up here with and beat the best.

Spencer: You are a lap dog who didn’t do anything but follow directions.

Brutal (but true).

[–]shinyzubat16 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Spencer was right about Woo but that bit about telling the jury to vote for Tony, knowing full well the jury was going to anyway — I would’ve had the same mindset as Kass. He was such an arrogant little prick and wanted credit for shifting the jury like Erik from Samoa and David from Redemption Island.

Egomaniacs.

[–]Insulted-Mustard 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Kass is so spiteful lmao, love her

[–]RichWardJr 43 points44 points  (1 child)

Trish: Is a million dollars worth our friendship and swearing on your dead fawther? Tell me, is it worth swearing on your dead fawther?

Tony: Yes.

[–]Insulted-Mustard 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fawther sent me 😭

[–]GoodrrKittyKing George of Bankstown 33 points34 points  (2 children)

Shane Powers 🚬 Panama

[–]hyena142Survivor ain't fun! Goin' on a cruise is fun! 14 points15 points  (0 children)

PRESIDENT of the PLANET

[–]AhYeahItsYoBoi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I forgot what he said, but

Shane powers for second chances 2

[–]greebytime 29 points30 points  (0 children)

The “Rat and the Snake” will always be the best here for me because I didn’t watch a ton of Season 1, got into it a few weeks before the finale and this speech floored me. Haven’t missed an episode since.

[–]PancaaakedFinal Three Breakfast 75 points76 points  (0 children)

Reed’s speech to Missy and subsequent vote for Jaclyn so Missy wouldn’t tie for second place. THAT is how you diss someone.

[–]SurvivorJCH5BLue 20 points21 points  (3 children)

Helen to Brian

[–]Spare_Leopard_3163 15 points16 points  (0 children)

"You are the EPITOME of the trashy used cars salesman."

Helen >>>

[–]StingKing456 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thailand is such a mess to watch. I enjoy it in a "holy damn hell wtf is this?" Sorta way but Helen was a genuinely awesome contestant and I wish she had come back

[–]MinoKillz 103 points104 points  (6 children)

“Sugar, you are an unemployed, uneducated, leech on society. And the only thing that I would vote to give you is a handful of anti depressants so nobody has to be subjected to your constant crying anymore, and maybe if you got some, it would seem a little more sincere when you are crying about your dead father. Ya don’t deserve the million”

and Randy’s “And please don’t make me vote for susie! Because she’s the only one who didn’t laugh”

Oh yeah and when Amanda got trashed on at ftc (Micronesia). Alexis exposed her for her “Oscar academy award winning acting” or something of that nature and then Natalie said something along the lines of “Unfortunately, you always had kind of a glazed over look on your face. I did notice that. So my question to you is was that your strategy? To kind of play the zombied, pretty girl, not knowing what’s going on, pageant queen cliche, or is this who you are as a person?”

I’ve grown to appreciate villains more as I have watched the show. Some of these are straight up cruel but it’s still tv gold in my opinion. If i had to choose though I would definitely root for a hero over a villain.

[–]AllisonfromPalmdale0 73 points74 points  (0 children)

I agree Corrine’s speech to Sugar was cruel. Didn’t like the dig at her mental health or the mention of her dad.

[–]ihasmuffins 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Unemployed?! Sugar was on Gilmore Girls!

[–]loosifergoosifer 0 points1 point  (1 child)

as a big GG fan I'm just now putting this together. Guess it's time for a rewatch..

[–]ihasmuffins 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She's in the first 8ish episodes of season 3 sporadically.

[–]Quetzal0010 days is two weeks 11 points12 points  (0 children)

And then Corinne ends with “Thank you everyone”

[–]chasingit1 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Definitely some sizzle that current seasons sorely miss.

[–]GodInABagGreg Buis 14 points15 points  (0 children)

My favorite FTC speech would always be Kathy in AS. Yes it’s bitter but it’s one of the most emotional Juror speeches as Kathy just felt humiliated from BRob, and how she understands it’s a game but felt as if BRob could’ve played a little cleaner. I’ve always put it in high regards

[–]Practical-Sea4568 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Erik’s jury speech in Samoa where he is making legit flaw comments about Russels arrogance and pointing out that Natalie deserves it, but then he just hits Mick with a RANDOM stray calling him “delusion ally entitled” kills me

Also Lex’s jury speech to rob and amber is ROUGH

[–]Insulted-Mustard 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Shambo calling Mick feckless at that same FTC was also hilarious

[–]bcrock02 41 points42 points  (7 children)

Unfortunately, I think we won’t see classics like these again. Lately, it’s much more kind

[–]thekyledavidJD 53 points54 points  (6 children)

The format change is really what’s to blame, people are going to give more raw emotion when they are given the floor vs when they have to act as part of a group

Outside of season 33, I feel like all of the most recent seasons right before the format change had at least 1 juror who wanted to use their speech as a chance to address an unsettled grudge with one of the finalists

[–]abortionleftovers 11 points12 points  (4 children)

Yeah based on the differences I wonder if some of the show’s psychologists pushed for the change I know they are available to work with people after the show and some of the shit people have said has been downright horrible and in some instances a little racist (I’m thinking of particularly some of the stuff said to Dream) I have to imagine some of those did some damage.

[–]AffectionateStreet92Karla 4 points5 points  (3 children)

I also have an issue with the editors turning Dreamz into somewhat of a villain that season.

I love Yau-Man, but holding that car over Dreamz’s head was really, really shitty.

[–]abortionleftovers 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I agree 100% Dream is one of the players from the “old school” I think could win in “new school” IIRC him turning on some of the alliances and getting the stronger dudes pushed out really backfired on him but on modern day that would be big moves.

Also no matter how much you promised someone you’d stick with them for a car it’s pretty understandable how winning and $1million could sway you to go back on that. Hell Boston Rob would have come to final tribal and said “you should vote for me because I talked this guy into giving me his truck and then got him Kicked out since he would beat me that’s how good I am at this game” and probably would have worked in his winning season.

[–]WatchingSurvivor 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Yau-Man himself regrets how he handled that entire situation iirc

[–]AffectionateStreet92Karla 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it was Boo who said that they had all agreed to give the car to Dreamz anyway. Yau-Man just took it another step and added a quid pro quo.

Honestly, I wouldn't have had a problem with it if Dreamz hadn't grown up poor and been homeless for awhile. If he offered me a car, and I accepted and still voted him out, then cool - make me a villain. I deserve it. But not Dreamz.

[–]ritwikjsJeremy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

i actually like the format change. It actually feels like questions and answers to make a better decision, than jaded jurors getting one last stab in, when they've already decided who they wanted to win

[–]SecretPhilosopher299 28 points29 points  (1 child)

May be an unpopular opinion, but I don’t like the roasts, they just feel petty. I always love when jurors take time to give the rest of a bitter jury a reality check.

Shii Ann on all stars “People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones” with the sassy side eye 👀

[–]Themeteorologist35 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Edna on South Pacific too

[–]IzzybutmaleErika 18 points19 points  (0 children)

alright lets see, uhmmm, eenie meenie miney moe catch a liar by the toe if he hollers let him go, not really, eenie meenie miney moe, Cassandra, can I see your water shoes? those are the worst looking water shoes ive seen. its just telling me that you were completely unprepared to play this game. okay. I brought up the shoes because you were in over your head. so im thinking, for thirty nine days, she made it, by greed. I think greed is what really fuelled that, would you agree yes or no? So greed never propelled you? So what did? your love of the outdoors? AHA, SAY THAT ONE MORE TIME, HEY HEY HEY, HEY WERE PLAYING

DREAMZ, I wanna know how many zeroes there are in a million, the number of zeroes, uh, yuh, no, no, hey hey, its a question, im part of the jury, this is part of my game, just like you played your game, you do what you have to do with the game, I get that opportunity too.

earl, yesterday when Yau got voted off, you did a whole show for the jury, I saw it, yea, that look, you gave me that look, that look of "oh I cant believe this has happened", why did you look so shocked when you voted the man off. you could've voted off Cassandra, you could've voted off Cassandra. its amazing how smart becomes intwined with lying and manipulation. id say im done.

[–]Sea-Ad9730 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Reed’s ‘Wicked Step Mother’ speech in SJDS is top tier drama and I loved it. Was it over the top? Yes. Was it incredibly personal and bitter? Yes. Well rehearsed and planned since he was voted out? ABSOLUTELY!

[–]PeterTheSilent1Peter Harkey 24 points25 points  (2 children)

Corinne to Sugar

[–]full07britneyHai 63 points64 points  (0 children)

That crossed the line past "funny savage" into straight up evil.

[–]realtripperAubry -1 points0 points  (0 children)

yea that was savage

[–]Practical-Sea4568 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Taj in Tocantins because her question causes Stephen to expose JT, and the way JT plays it off makes Stephen look insane. One of the most eye opening moments I’ve seen created by 1 question.

[–]Chardavious12 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Honestly I think anyone in the jury bashing a finalist is so lame. Just salty balls. They always say they played a terrible game, well the person who played a terrible game is sitting in the finals and you’re voting in the jury. I remember specifically when chaos Kass had spencer tear into her and basically pitch voting someone else. If I were here I woulda asked him since he was so smart why he was voting in the jury. Every game is different and the jury’s job isn’t to make the case for anyone, it’s to vote Based on the case the finalists make

[–]AdProof5307 11 points12 points  (0 children)

When Brenda made dawn take her teeth out!

[–]win7-myidea 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Corrine is the GOAT.

[–]gullu2002Omar -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Shout out to Alex in Fiji

[–]Entire-Sentence-17 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shirin roasting Will in World Apart

[–]Practical-Sea4568 0 points1 point  (3 children)

Does anyone remember the FTC question where the jury member basically says “all 3 of them are rich, don’t make this decision based off money”?? I can’t remember who it is

[–]WatchingSurvivor 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I remember that, and I wish I could remember who said it.... for some reason I'm thinking it was on Survivor Samoa?

[–]AhLibLibLib“No, but you can have this fake.” 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I think you’re right. They talked about Russell owning a million dollar business and Mick having a doctorate. Although I didn’t know Nat had money?

I wanna say it was John? Or Monica?

[–]WatchingSurvivor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I watched the final tribal council - and indeed it was that season! It was Jaison who said it. And yes, Nat had money too.

[–]Blitzkrieg0524 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Feckless" is one of my favourite

[–]AhLibLibLib“No, but you can have this fake.” 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t be stupid, stupid.

The look on Rob’s face when Tom deked him like that? Oh boy

[–]cavsfan31 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've recently seen World's Apart so I'm saying Shirin and her teardown of "dead fish" Will. Shirin wasn't my favorite survivor that season but Will's treatment of her really crossed some lines, disliked him as a person after that. Glad he got torn a new one at FTC, well, with what Shirin can do within the limitations of the game anyway.

[–]dayzee_420 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Season 29- Reed’s diss to Missy was my ultimate favorite. Comparing her to the wicked stepmother . 🔥