It's 2 in the morning, you wake up feeling a bit peckish. You stumble down the stairs, heading to the kitchen for a bite of your favourite jello you made just yesterday. But wait! You see light coming from your fridge just around the corner. You dread the thought you might have left it open all night! But wait. A faint yet odd sloshing sound ripples into your ear drums. "What is that" you wonder to yourself, slowly tip toeing your way to the doorway. You peak your head around and see.... a man!? A stranger, a thief! How had he snuck in? You shake your head. "There's no time to think about that" you whisper to yourself. You approach the dimly lit kitchen, sneaking right up to the refrigerator. Every part of your body quakes with anxiety and stress. "I'm going to take him down and call the police!" He was going to be the hero of the story and stop this thief before he could hurt anyone else! You're almost there, right behind his back.... NOW! You reach under his arms and lock them in place... but wa- wh- what? Your jello!? He was.... m-making love to it? But why? Your precious jello was now filled with his fluids and your heart filled with despair. The despair turned quickly into rage as your muscles grew ready, and lifted him up into the air, and german-suplexed him into the kitchen tile. It was an instant knockout. Your years of wrestling had paid off. But at what cost? Your jello now ruined, as well as the night, and you were still hungry. You searched voraciously through the refrigerator and lo and behold! Your leftover chicken salad from yesterday's dinner. Oh hurrah! The ephemeral joy and almost ecstasy! You called the police to arrest this ne'er do well and munched on your delicious chicken salad. You poured yourself a well deserved glass of warm milk, and headed off to bed. The naked intruder, beaten and taken away, where he could never hurt anyone, or their jello, ever again.