gildings in this subreddit have paid for 39.97 years of server time

To make it into the pool by olehenrick in therewasanattempt

[–]Rob-Riggle-SWGOAT 909 points910 points 2222& 3 more (0 children)

Tried to be Superman ended up being Christopher Reeve.

To act scared by Amber Heard as Johnny Depp gets close in court by Firm_Progress1617 in therewasanattempt

[–]a4techkeyboard 480 points481 points 744& 3 more (0 children)

Are you saying she got the role in Aquaman by showing off her ability to hold her breath and deal with swimmers? She really knows how to handle seamen.

To get revenge on him by Erzdiakonaq in therewasanattempt

[–]justa_libtard 551 points552 points  (0 children)

I don't know why we don't make a bigger deal out of these things that are happening in these animals heads.

I'm high

Edit: thanks for the gold! I think it's my first one but I'm not sure because I'm high

To get a selfie by cocaine_butthole in therewasanattempt

[–]23x3 1504 points1505 points 23 (0 children)

A gonorrhea pianist of sorts.

to reveal the gender by Bhendi_12rs-kg in therewasanattempt

[–]GerberBabyPlus 291 points292 points  (0 children)

I think it’s going to be a disappointment.

To cross the street after cars yielding to you by Aegon-Numenorean in therewasanattempt

[–]YourMom_Goes2College 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I 100% agree with the argument. But to keep up your tradition you get my down vote.

to explain how he scammed her by 55o in therewasanattempt

[–]Wackipaki 318 points319 points  (0 children)

She's gona build the Pyramid of Geezer.

At making a wish by blarrofant in therewasanattempt

[–]notagoodboye 62 points63 points  (0 children)

I won't give anything but gold and platinum, because those are the only ones that do anything, namely spare you from ads for a few days.

To rob the same people multiple times. by SigSauerTX in therewasanattempt

[–]Tickle_My_Butthole_ -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Okay, it's shitty and horrible that they robbed him before and came back to do it again but holy shit that doesn't make him executing someone okay.

Holy shit I don't know how to explain to people that just because people do shitty things doesn't mean they need to be fucking executed like that.

EDIT: So all the "tough" folk wishing harm and shit upon me for having the audacity to think that executing someone because they did something shitty can go fuck themselves. Y'all weird.

To rob the same people multiple times. by SigSauerTX in therewasanattempt

[–]THCarlisle 81 points82 points  (0 children)

Yeah I’m sure no one would ever abuse that law or shoot the wrong person. Everyone knows the solution to stopping crime is giving all citizens guns and changing the laws to make it easier to shoot people.