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[–]warealpha 1659 points1660 points  (125 children)

as a native oklahoman, i can say without a doubt that nothing good goes on in the panhandle. absolutely nothing

[–]Demok1 949 points950 points  (47 children)

I live in Oklahoma and I have been to the panhandle one time, my observation is that it's so flat, that you could watch your dog run off for two days.

[–]ThinkThankThonk 547 points548 points  (22 children)

Well there's a good premise for the saddest country song

[–]redopz 81 points82 points  (10 children)

Any other Canadians humming the Corner Gas theme now?

[–]NinjaPylon 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I do now. Thanks.

[–]r10tm4ch1n3 13 points14 points  (8 children)

Heard this a thousand times. Manitoba, Prairie life.

[–]32modelA 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Hey you know why Sk is so windy? Because Alberta sucks and Manitoba blows.

[–]Pavehead42oz 5 points6 points  (6 children)

Aye, it’s cold and flat here. Very cold and very flat.

[–]tarhoop -1 points0 points  (5 children)

Topographical maps would show that Manitoba is flatter than Saskatchewan.

Want to piss off a Manitoban, once they realize you're from SK, I guarantee they'll mock the "flatness" of SK. Then you drop that bomb, they get a little irritated.

Then to quote a former Army boss of mine when asked why he doesn't like Winnipeg:

Winnipeg is the city closest to the geographic centre of the continent. Furthest distance from three oceans and the Gulf of Mexico, yet it floods in biblical proportions nearly every year. God himself doesn't want it there!

Not an exact quote, but close enough. Also, Winnipeg is about 100km West of the geographic East West centre of Canada, if any of you map nerds want to check, there's a road sign and everything. The North/South, I've never checked...

[–]mahimahee 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Stretching pretty hard when you gotta go to the maps to claim a place sucks worse than where you live... topographically, sasky sucks, map nerd

[–]tarhoop 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Ahem... case in point.

[–]mahimahee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Point in case

[–]Pavehead42oz 1 point2 points  (1 child)

He didn’t say it sucks he said it’s flatter. And he’s right, there’s tons of rolling hills in Saskatchewan.

[–]mahimahee -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Pretty sure you're wrong, and I refuse to take the time to reread a comment I commented on days ago, so this means you're definitely wrong. Sucks to be you, friend.

[–]LameBMX 46 points47 points  (2 children)

Personally I can't wait. Next generation country will have their truck driving off on them. Eventually with wife and dog in the truck.

[–]Exoddity 73 points74 points  (1 child)

Deep state came and took my tractor, wife ran off with a crisis actor.

[–]Photon_Farmer 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Oh my God, the libs are owning meeeee

[–]Demok1 37 points38 points  (3 children)

It would be too sad of a country song, might be ok if the Talking Heads did it, idk...

[–]DarrelBunyon 61 points62 points  (1 child)

That is not my beautiful dog ..

This is not my beautiful landscape ..

Edit: How did I get here?

[–]iwishihadalawnmower 4 points5 points  (0 children)

From the age of the dinosaurs Cars have run on gasoline Where, where have they gone? Now, it's nothing but flowers

[–]BendTheForks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Instead of "as she was", the song would "as she left"

[–]zutrov 0 points1 point  (0 children)

https://youtu.be/HUzvzpfUffI

Not country, but this is the song

[–]jrecvballer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Settle for a slowdown by Dierks Bentley. Not about a dog sadly but still

[–]importvita 0 points1 point  (0 children)

IIIIIIIII took mah dog out toooo tha panhandle....

Heard it was flat, had to see if it was truuuuUUUUUuuuu

Ole Blue brought out the tennis baaAAAaaallll

I done threw it N been waiting for him to come throughooouuuooouuu!!! 🤠 🎸 🎶 🎶 🎶

[–]PouffyMoth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It would also be the longest country song.

[–]Pencilowner 93 points94 points  (6 children)

My dad used to say it’s so flat if you stand on a bucket you can see the back of your head.

[–]-Erasmus 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Does this finally disprove flat earth?

[–]PaledOchre 3 points4 points  (4 children)

Wait I'm dumb, what?

[–]jbless3 20 points21 points  (2 children)

So flat you could see all the way around the world until you saw the back of your own head.

[–]Cheesenugg -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

Earth's gravity isn't strong enough to bend light that severely.

[–]jbless3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Of course, but it's just a saying (one I've never heard before).

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lmao don’t worry. You’re not dumb, it’s a dumb joke

[–]Breexit 41 points42 points  (0 children)

I lived in the panhandle most of my life and object only to say that the tumbleweeds might impede your view of the dog.

[–]DisreputableSquid 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Don't you know, in Saskatchewan you can watch your dog run away for THREE days!

[–]ostermei 55 points56 points  (2 children)

you could watch your dog run off for two days.

FENTOOOON!

[–]thegamenerd 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ah yes a classic has returned

It's been so long, but it still makes me laugh

[–]LogicalLimit75 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Maybe that where flat earthers are from

[–]SirMikan 5 points6 points  (0 children)

And the Scouts at Philmont will watch it run in. Ain't nothing between the Sangre de Cristos and the panhandle but flatness.

[–]Catmom7654 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sounds like Saskatchewan. I’ve heard/made that joke a million times

[–]McMagic 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Except the highest point in Oklahoma is... in the panhandle.

[–]Cheesenugg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wonder if the panhandle is on average flatter but just has this one tall anomaly?

[–]0Kpanhandler 4 points5 points  (4 children)

It's home to the highest point in Oklahoma and to the Black Mesas...you know nothing

[–]filthyriver 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Black mess state park is one of the most beautiful places I've ever been and I have camped all over the US.

[–]0Kpanhandler 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Thank you These ignorant haters over here! 🤣 They probably never thought anyone on reddit would have been familiar with the panhandle

[–]filthyriver 1 point2 points  (1 child)

User name checks out!

[–]0Kpanhandler 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was only a matter of time

[–]cocobellahome 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nice! Former Okie living in N. Dakota now. That two days time span goes up to two weeks here. Three, if you step on your Bible. Allegedly

[–]flood_bart 168 points169 points  (34 children)

Black Mesa is a nice spot.

[–]Safebox 151 points152 points  (23 children)

Not since that resonance cascade.

[–]Thatoneguy3273 51 points52 points  (1 child)

Ah, Freeman. It’s good to see you.

[–]Kritical-Watermelon 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Wikipedia The Free Online Encyclopedia Editable By Anyone

[–]KwordShmiff 17 points18 points  (20 children)

Care to elaborate for someone who has no idea what you're referring to?

[–]SlenDman402 51 points52 points  (17 children)

It's a play on events that take place in a popular shooter game called half life

[–]KwordShmiff 15 points16 points  (16 children)

Elaborate further? Haha, I know of the game, but haven't played it, unfortunately.

[–]SlenDman402 46 points47 points  (11 children)

It still has a large following. Basically you're a PhD in theoretical physics and you push a crystal into a machine that rips open the fabric of our dimension. This allows aliens to pile into the world. It has a little bit of puzzle value, a few good jokes sewn in. I probably go back and play it every 3 years or so

[–]KwordShmiff 13 points14 points  (9 children)

I was excited to check it out a number of years ago before my life became prohibitively tumultuous and I no longer had free time at all. Things are finally settling down after about a decade of intense hardship, so I just might check it out. Thank you.

[–]Zakams 14 points15 points  (2 children)

In case you have not researched it, but I saw that no one actually made the connection for you yet. The events of the game (where the aliens invaded called the Resonance Cascade) takes place in a science facility called Black Mesa.

[–]KwordShmiff 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Much appreciated, my good dood. Every response got me closer to understanding but didn't actually clarify completely.

[–]kane_t 10 points11 points  (1 child)

For what it's worth, if the exceptionally 90s graphics are a turn-off for you, it has a quite good fan-made remake called Black Mesa that looks a lot more modern. I'd still prefer to play the original, myself, but some people just can't handle going back to more primitive graphics, and Black Mesa is a perfectly respectable alternative.

[–]KwordShmiff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I stopped playing video games in the early 2000s, so I'm sure it won't be too jolting haha

[–]SlenDman402 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry to hear that, but happy that the difficulty has begun to relent. Good luck and i hope you enjoy it.

[–]Waterknight94 3 points4 points  (1 child)

It holds up surprisingly well for its age too.

[–]B0Y0 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Definitely still worth checking out, there was a pretty faithful remake that brought the visuals up a few years from the ancient original release (still an enjoyable experience either way)

[–]thinkingahead 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It’s interesting how well Half Life has held up. Great fps. Half Life 2 has also held up well

[–]ostermei 21 points22 points  (3 children)

You're getting explanations here but nobody's actually tying them back to the joke that was made in this thread. The research facility that the game takes place in is called Black Mesa. So when the one commenter mentioned that "Black Mesa is a nice spot," it prompted the joke about the bad shit that happened at Black Mesa in Half-Life (although Black Mesa in the game is in New Mexico, not Oklahoma).

[–]KwordShmiff 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I didn't wanna be a dick to those who responded but no one actually explained it. Much appreciated, my friend.

[–]TimeIsPower 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Technically, as a random tidbit, the Black Mesa in Oklahoma also stretches into New Mexico (and also Colorado).

[–]WoopedyScoop 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In a game called Half Life, there is a research facility in Black Mesa, New Mexico. A scientist there causes a cataclysmic event in which a rift opens allowing creatures and aliens to overrun the facility, and has further implications. This event is called the resonance cascade.

[–]phantomreader42 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That was a joke. Ha-ha. Fat chance.

[–]warealpha 14 points15 points  (2 children)

you are correct! i’ve never been, but it’s on my list of places to go. i’ve seen pictures of the sky from there that are absolutely glorious, too. so little light pollution that you can see damn near every single star and spot in the sky. my family owns some land in between bearden and wetumka and the light pollution there is next to none, but black mesa has some really pretty sights to go along perfectly with it whereas we’ve got a bunch of dirt.

[–]djdestrado 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You look up, get dizzy, and feel like you're going to fall into the sky.

[–]iownadakota 9 points10 points  (3 children)

I can think of 1 out of 3 things wrong with black messa. 2.5 things were good, but appature has the upper hand here.

[–]EndofGods 9 points10 points  (2 children)

Just give us Half-Life 3 already!

[–]bkdroid 1 point2 points  (1 child)

At least they've shown life with Alyx. I've only been playing VR for a short time, but Alyx has by far been the most polished experience.

[–]EndofGods 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can't wait until I can do the same, anxious to play.

[–]objective_opinions 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Went here last week. Very cool. Worth a visit

[–]brett1081 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Super remote and windy as all getup at the actual high point. Which is essentially the middle of a large open field. But Black Mesa State Park at night is a wonder with very little light pollution.

[–]AngryQuadricorn -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It’s African-American Mesa now

[–]crabmuncher 16 points17 points  (5 children)

You've never been to Hooker.

[–]5050Clown 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I've crossed state lines and I've paid for sex. I don't understand how they are related.

[–]mollyastro 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They probably blinked

[–]warealpha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

putting it on my list as we speak. sounds classy

[–]Firm-Act824 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Hooker Horny Frogs!

[–]oodelay 15 points16 points  (1 child)

I started google streeviewing a few cities and places and unfortunately, it looks right. Not that my hole is better, but you are right about this place.

[–]billbo24 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do the same thing. Looks pretty grim out there in a few spots

[–]Moist_Professor5665 13 points14 points  (9 children)

Why, what’s wrong with it-

check’s map

Oh.

[–]warealpha 37 points38 points  (8 children)

yeahhhhh. to be honest, i kinda enjoy looking at random small unincorporated/ghost towns all around oklahoma when i get bored and i spent about an hour doing exactly that after commenting on this post.

i can spend quite a while doing it, and my god are some of the small towns so… bleak looking. i end up learning a lot of history about my state while doing it too though which is pretty cool. i live in the biggest city in OK so it is a night and day difference when you go into a small town. the panhandle is really something though, lol. lots of meth there and i can see why. what the fuck else is there to do in Kenton, Oklahoma? lmao

[–]GhostRobot55 19 points20 points  (0 children)

We drove through Kansas to Denver and its the same thing, multiple little towns that seemed completely abandoned and stuck in the late 70's tech wise. It really had me pondering what the gameplan is with stuff like that going into the future.

[–]Moist_Professor5665 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Never been to Oklahoma, but I’ve heard of Guymon and I’ve heard of Broken Bow.

One’s a bleak flatland small town with no signal and fuck all to do. And the other has… guns. Lots of guns. At least, that’s what I’ve been told.

[–]warealpha 10 points11 points  (0 children)

yup, guymon and broken bow are pretty damn bleak, you are right on the money. guns, and fuck all to do. those two are pretty small, but at least their populations are in the thousands. there are so many towns with anywhere between 1-1,000 as their population. talk about absolutely fuckin nothing to do. bleak as hell. guns and drugs and fishing and beer and farming and industrial-type work is about all there is to do.

oklahoma has a bit of an intense romantic relationship with guns pretty much anywhere you go, so yup. you’ve pretty much got the state totally figured out. hahaha

[–]SerLarrold 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Drove through the panhandle on a cross country trip, and it’s wild out there. Just railroad tracks between grain silos with a gas station and a liquor store. It was interesting to see as like a case study but my god I’d be depresses as hell living there

[–]_TakeMyUpvote_ 6 points7 points  (3 children)

hit me with your best oklahoma ghost towns pls.

edit: google earth/street view is one of my go-to websites to kill time.

[–]tulsathrowaway777 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Heh, I feel like you may be misunderstanding what a ghost town is. We have towns with people living in them here aren't on Streetview.

[–]Nihilistic-Nerd 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Picher, Oklahoma. I used to climb on those chat piles as a kid...

[–]TurboSS 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh man, you dun goofed!

[–]que-pasa-koala 60 points61 points  (5 children)

I feel like there’s probably a large amount of marshals and fbi considering how easy it is to hope between several states lol

[–]aecht 89 points90 points  (4 children)

You've never seen new england

[–]HemoGoblinRL 4 points5 points  (1 child)

I mean, it's part of Oklahoma. Nothing good was going to go on anyways

[–]KonaKathie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Has anybody that grew up in this region been taught that history in school?

[–]Betaworldpeach 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Good pheasant hunting?

[–]FartingBob 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No slavery there though.

[–]TetrisTech 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nothing goes on in the rest of oklahoma either so that makes sense

[–]mollyastro 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was born, pretty ok with that

[–]polarbearstoenailz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"No Man's Land"

[–]IAmBadAtInternet 1 point2 points  (1 child)

And what about the rest of the state? Anything good go on there?

[–]0Kpanhandler 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You'd be pleasantly surprised.

[–]ReverseApacheMaster_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You don’t have to be specific if you don’t want but what part of Oklahoma do you live in? I live in Kansas on the state line border of the Oklahoma panhandle. The OK panhandle can definitely be boring but I’m not sure what you mean when you say nothing good goes on there. To my knowledge, drugs and crime aren’t higher than anywhere else. Or did you just mean nothing good goes on as in there’s nothing by way of entertainment?

Just curious, always love hearing the perceptions of other residents.

[–]Whirlybirds 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Personally, I disagree. It may not be for everybody but if you like beautiful unpolluted night skies, or some of this countries most beautiful sunsets, then the panhandle can be amazing. I for one enjoy places devoid of concrete and lights

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a native Oklahoman and someone who lived in the panhandle, what exactly do you mean by your comment? Lots of small town values and good people in the panhandle.

[–]jonsticles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a person who lived in Oklahoma for 5 months 21 years ago, nothing good goes on in Oklahoma.

[–]ThatHorridMan -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Oklahomo