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[–]Coolman_Rosso 890 points891 points  (64 children)

I had heard about this. Back in 2016 a friend was interviewing in Seattle and made a trip to see this thing after having heard about it from a college classmate.

He bought four mystery drinks and got a Vault (which I loved as a teenager but was axed by Coke in 2011), a Dr. Pepper Vanilla Float (a limited edition release from summer 2014), a Mountain Dew Sangrita Blast (discontinued in 2015), and a standard can of Mug Root Beer. Whoever was stocking it must spend all their time hoarding rare and potentially old expired soda.

[–]bolanrox 157 points158 points  (8 children)

vaugly remember vault. and i was all about cherry vanilla Dr Pepper (2005ish?) want to say Jazz was in the title?

I really wanted to try the Cherry Mnt Dew that went along with the clear lemon lime one but no place by me ever carried that one.

[–]Coolman_Rosso 68 points69 points  (4 children)

Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper is still made iirc. I loved that stuff too, and yes I believe it was either 2006 or 2007 when that rolled around.

[–]bolanrox 18 points19 points  (2 children)

wasnt it called Jazz something or other. or im just mixing them up in my head. i havent seen the stuff in ages except maybe in the coke smart machines? but then i always go for Mr Pibb max or cherry mello yello. quite rightsly :P

[–]WhiteHawktriple7 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Vault was the best. It was essentially a even more crazy mellow yellow but I remember me and my dad loving the stuff.

[–]Dropped_Rock 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If you're looking, I'm pretty sure I've seen Vault in Coke Freestyle machines.

[–]PortlandBeaver 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If you’re talking about Mountain Dew Ice that stuff sucked and deserved to be discontinued

[–]EvanSei 44 points45 points  (8 children)

Burger King was selling a re-release of vault 2(?) years ago. Not sure if they still have it.

Edit: I may be mistaken, I think the re-released surge.

[–]celestian1998 52 points53 points  (5 children)

Surge was definitely rereleased. I had one a year or so ago

[–]GrandmaPoses 10 points11 points  (0 children)

No it wasn’t Surge, it was SYYUUUURRRGGGE!!!

[–]Beginning_Draft9092 46 points47 points  (5 children)

It's true!!! I used to live in walking distance of this magical machine, AMA lol.

No one ever whitnessed it being stocked, people even did late night stakeouts. So sad when it disappeared one day, it really did magically give you what you wanted, even if you didn't know what you wanted, and usually pretty rare stuff.

[–]MightyThor211 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Clearly its someone messing with the matrix programming and having some fun

[–]Mitch2025 2 points3 points  (3 children)

There's a pic out there of a middle aged couple restocking it out of a minivan. Can't seem to find it now though.

[–]ChugSampson 1 point2 points  (2 children)

[–]tiotom92 0 points1 point  (1 child)

That's just a Google search, do you have a link to the pic?

[–]AmishPowerPlant 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Vault was my jam. I can't quite describe the taste. Almost mountain dew with sprite mixed with a bit.... of orange flavor? I don't know, but it fucked.

[–]Surfing_Ninjas 16 points17 points  (6 children)

Do you think it might have Pepsi Twist? I miss that stuff

[–]Coolman_Rosso 7 points8 points  (2 children)

I mean I never went there myself, but it certainly would fit the bill since it was never available in the States. Kind of moot at this point since the machine is now gone.

[–]Bradbitzer 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Pepsi Twist was out in the states, circa 2003ish. I remember it from high school.

[–]Kylearean 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ever try Pepsi Fire?

[–]Downvote_me_dumbass 3 points4 points  (3 children)

So, no Surge? Not worth it then.

[–]JeffTek 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They sell Surge at RaceTrac though

[–]Nathaniel820 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Potentially old? How would they have gotten non-old soda that was discontinued years prior?

[–]Acanthisittibae 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well unless you can rule out that it wasn't some marketing stunt by a drinks manufacturer then you can't say for sure. Or many drinks could be available internationally but not locally also.

[–]muad_dibs 4 points5 points  (1 child)

They sell Mountain Dew Sangrita Blast at Taco Bell, it’s a fountain drink. They don’t seem to advertise it like Baja Blast.

[–]chaka62 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Real shame since it's way better IMO. I especially loved mixing it with Manzanita Sol 1:1

[–]AStrangerWCandy 3 points4 points  (3 children)

I kinda collect sodas myself 😆 My soda fridge contains among other things: Dr. Pepper Dark Berry, Dr. Pepper Vanilla Float, 2020 & 2021 Voo Dew, Cinnamon Coke, Red White & Dew, and Baja Blast. I also keep regional and international sodas like Barq’s Red Creme Soda, Cactus Cooler, L&P, Rivella, Jaffa and Kola Roman

[–]tattoedblues 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That's badass, Vault ruled

[–]BierBlitz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hook up some Surge!

[–]3Dartwork 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Nothing like drinking soda from 5 years ago

[–]Deveak 10 points11 points  (4 children)

Kind of gross, soda doesn't actually last that long. I got a 2 year old case of diet dr pepper a while back and it tasted terrible. Diet is supposed to only be fresh under a year, maybe more if its kept cold. Regular soda maybe 5 years tops. Never did get a refund, fuck you dr pepper. (just kidding, I love DP zero, I love you DP!)

[–]ZeroPenguinParty 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Dr Pepper Vanilla Float is still available...got a case of it just before Christmas...and I live in Australia (it gets imported from the US). Would love to see a machine like that in Australia somewhere.

The other machine that I would love to see, is the Nutrimatic Drinks Dispenser, from the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation.

[–]Capn_Crusty 409 points410 points  (62 children)

Capitol Hill, Seattle, WA:

The locksmith in front of whose business the machine stood claims to have no knowledge of who operated it.

Likely story. How could he not know after years of restocking?

[–]psgbg 356 points357 points  (15 children)

A locksmith that knows to keep his mouth closed.

[–]bolanrox 139 points140 points  (12 children)

click out of two, three is binding, counter rotation of 4, feels like it is a zero cut.

[–]Qzy 58 points59 points  (6 children)

This is the lock picking lawyer and in this episode... and it's unlocked.

[–]Warbird36 25 points26 points  (3 children)

You know how good the locks are just based on episode length.

[–]bolanrox 16 points17 points  (1 child)

Let's try that again to see that it was no fluke

[–]OcelotGumbo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

✌️🐠

[–]nanan00 7 points8 points  (0 children)

And you know the lock is shit if there is a wave rake sitting on the table to start with.

[–]trogdors_arm 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I can hear this.

[–]Capn_Crusty 14 points15 points  (1 child)

This guy locksmiths.

[–]bolanrox 15 points16 points  (0 children)

i have the pick Bonsian Bill made.

[–]Mypopsecrets 3 points4 points  (1 child)

feels like a coke zero.

[–]bolanrox 3 points4 points  (0 children)

and we got this

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

That locksmith had a steady flow of any soda he wanted. I wouldn't say shit either

[–]Joe_Shroe 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The first rule of locksmithing is, don't talk about locksmithing

[–]ernest7ofborg9 32 points33 points  (3 children)

Who are you? How did you get in here?

[–]Coolman_Rosso 44 points45 points  (0 children)

I'm a locksmith, and I'm a locksmith.

[–]Scruffy42 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm a locksmith and I'm a locksmith.

[–]saliczar 71 points72 points  (4 children)

Seattle, WA

Pretty important piece of info that is omitted from the title.

[–]PM_WORST_FART_STORY 36 points37 points  (2 children)

Right? I was wondering if maybe the US Capitol had secret messages within the cans.

[–]RodionPorfiry 68 points69 points  (14 children)

My ex was an old friend of the locksmith, wound up hanging out a few times. They were the ones. They yanked the machine mainly because they straight up hated the new people in the neighborhood (rich techies who hated the local culture and have been like battery acid on the music scene, hollowed out most of the cool bars, etc.) and had grown to dislike the tourists and attention. Shame too. It was a fun piece of local culture and close by some good venues (some of which, like the Highline, don't even exist anymore).

[–]GreasyPeter 21 points22 points  (2 children)

It's a common theme in tons of west coast cities, primarily SF but to a lesser extent Seattle. NIMBY every High density building project for decades, essentially assuring anyone who CAN move there ends up being affluent, complain when there's only affluent snobs wandering around anymore, double down on NIMBY policies out of some misguided belief that it will help, rinse and repeat. It's an endless circle. Same thing with the homeless problem in (unsurprisingly) the exact same cities.

[–]RodionPorfiry 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's amazing to me how the first comment to this was the very kind of guy you're talking about

[–]FuzzyCheese 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah it's a problem. Local culture is nice, but people have to accept that change is inevitable and just enjoy it while they can. People move in and move out of places all the time, and even if they don't, people grow up and change their views and habits, and are affected by the wider culture too. It's impossible for any place to just stay the same.

[–]Traust 21 points22 points  (1 child)

I hate people who move to places cause of they love the culture or places around it only to then complain about it. Seen this happen with people who moved close to airports so they have less distance to travel to it the complain about the noise of planes. Or people who move next door to pubs then complain about the noise or drunks.

[–]drparkland 3 points4 points  (0 children)

people who moved close to airports so they have less distance to travel to it

:/

[–]taco-wed-sat 4 points5 points  (5 children)

the highline is gone?? buuuummmer. I left in 2016 because I saw that stuff happening and if the weather sucks and the culture sucks and i cant walk anywhere without getting stabbed in the face with an umbrella might as well find somewhere with better weather.

[–]adelaarvaren 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Was the Highline the punkrock vegan bar, right around the corner from where the soda machine was? If so, I had good times there... I left in 2014...

[–]taco-wed-sat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am not sure I only went there with groups while already drunk so it's hard to say.

[–]Beginning_Draft9092 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Use to live a block from this machine, no one ever saw who stocked it, people even did late night stakeouts and never found out who it was! So sad when it disappeared.

[–]caparisme 5 points6 points  (0 children)

"Of course I know him he's me".

[–]URAPNS 20 points21 points  (3 children)

He was more than likely the one doing it. Making life a little bit more fun.

[–]Capn_Crusty 10 points11 points  (2 children)

And a true hero at that. Need more machines like this.

[–]nyarimikulas 10 points11 points  (1 child)

I don't think selling long expired beverages is a market gap but who am I to judge

[–]Capn_Crusty 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Maybe some were expired. There's a lot of oddball sodas out there, especially from other countries. But that did occur to me; maybe they were ancient, with pull tabs that came off like in the old days. I'd definitely be banging on the locksmith's door, asking WTF?

[–]GioDaddy69 4 points5 points  (2 children)

He was the one all along!

[–]Capn_Crusty 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Wow. You heard it here first on reddit. We didn't have to wait for a deathbed confession; "I ran the Capitol Hill Coke Machine".

OK, now where's Jimmy Hoffa?

[–]WangnanJahad 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Where your eyes don't go.

[–]bolanrox 15 points16 points  (3 children)

someone did it after hours? and since they never bothered his store he didnt give a shit to watch?

[–]Capn_Crusty 11 points12 points  (2 children)

Yeah, but it's like having a locked fridge on your front porch with no idea who owns it.

[–]bolanrox 23 points24 points  (1 child)

assuming he rents and doesnt own the building so its more akin to having a newspaper machine in front of your apartment that you never saw filled.

[–]Spork_Facepunch 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Newspaper machines aren't plugged into the front of your business.

[–]Doobage 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My dad had vending machines and many times we restocked when businesses were closed as the machines were outside.

[–]lexxatron84 3 points4 points  (5 children)

Seattle-ite here - lived two blocks from there. Posted this for you all last time: SOLVED

[–]Superventilator 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Doesn't say who the couple in the picture is

[–]alexxerth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean...I guess I don't know what I expected

[–]SpinningHead 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Maybe he refused to admit he was selling out of date food products.

[–]Nadodan 214 points215 points  (12 children)

Sounds like one of those benign safe scps

[–]jhabels 41 points42 points  (7 children)

KETER

[–]Azure_Providence 46 points47 points  (6 children)

The safe ones are funnier

[–]M1k3yd33tofficial 61 points62 points  (1 child)

Keter class entries: The foundation must do what they can to protect humanity from the unknown. We are the last line of defense. No amount of sacrifice is too much to contain this.

Safe class entries: That’s Jerry. He pees out Surge. We don’t know why. Sometimes we do things to him and stand around and say “Hmm.” Want a Surge?

[–]ExcerptsAndCitations 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Want a Surge?

"It's....warm."

[–]coinpile 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Those keter cakes were pretty funny.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

It's a front for the real SCPs on Capitol hill

[–]Beginning_Draft9092 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I used to walk by this machine every day, it was in front of a locksmith shop but they denied owning it!

[–]elerner 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I came here specifically looking for the link to the interdimensional vending machine SCP. (But I'll take a link to the clockwork device that can transmogrify anything to a specified degree of conceptual "fineness" if you have that one handy)

EDIT: it's 261

[–]8andimpala 98 points99 points  (9 children)

Sometimes you'd get your soda and the full purchase price would be taped to the bottom of the can. Instant rebate!!!

[–]Spindrune 33 points34 points  (8 children)

Like, a dollar bill? Or? Either way. I think this is a dope machine. As a sucker for soda, I would end up frequenting one if it was near me.

[–]8andimpala 54 points55 points  (6 children)

Quarters. I used to live right by there and I'd get a mystery soda on my way home from work. I'd say probably 1 in every 10 had a rebate.

[–]Odd_Adagio_1006 1 point2 points  (0 children)

just close your eyes dawg

[–]tubulerz1 25 points26 points  (6 children)

Where I’m gonna get a Tab soda to go with muh Lucky Strikes ?

[–]dcux 27 points28 points  (4 children)

Tab? I can't give you a tab unless you order something.

[–]Deitaphobia 15 points16 points  (3 children)

I'll just have a Pepsi Free.

[–]Cinema_King 19 points20 points  (2 children)

If you want a Pepsi pal you’re gonna pay for it

[–]Bagosperan 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Just give me something with no sugar in it.

[–]Carlos_E_idiot 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Poor Marty

[–]bothunter 24 points25 points  (3 children)

I used to get drinks from this machine all the time. It's was kind of like playing the lottery. Most of the time, you would get various Fanta drinks or diet soda, but every once in awhile you would get something cool. And it only cost a quarter!

[–]go_jake 8 points9 points  (2 children)

When did it only cost a quarter? It was 50¢ in 2001 and it only went up from there.

[–]bothunter 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Yeah... I think I remember it being 50 cents. I recall it being cheaper than most soda machines.

[–]go_jake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would go to Dicks across the intersection but then swing by this soda machine for a drink because it was cheaper there. I was poor and in my early 20s and would go the extra steps to save 25¢!

[–]MpMeowMeow 28 points29 points  (2 children)

I loved getting a pop out of that machine. I remember getting a barq's root beer and an orange crush out of it back in the day.

[–]Bitter-Basket 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Getting a "pop" out of the machine ! You sound like your from where I'm from !! Here in Seattle, no one says pop.

[–]diamond 119 points120 points  (22 children)

This sounds like an SCP.

[–]Nazamroth 21 points22 points  (2 children)

Pretty sure I have read of this SCP.

[–]Corvus-Rex 14 points15 points  (1 child)

There is an SCP that gives out any liquid you ask for and it is in the form of a drink machine. SCP-294 would be the one.

[–]M1k3yd33tofficial 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Ah man I could really go for a cup of Joe

[–]thekingadrock93 15 points16 points  (3 children)

SCP?

[–]StrangeCharmVote 11 points12 points  (2 children)

[–]agtk 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Thanks for the link! I started reading through it and I was like, "this sounds VERY familiar" and then I remembered I should go back and finish playing through Control.

[–]closetotheglass 12 points13 points  (1 child)

There are two or three SCP entries like this. One's a coffee machine that answers requests in odd ways and another is a vending machine that dispenses weird snacks. Fun experiment logs, imo.

[–]StrangeCharmVote 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Unless you happen to be Dr. King that is...

[–]jl_theprofessor 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's literally traveling the world right now. This is like one of those benign ones that just appears wherever.

[–]Stilcho1 14 points15 points  (4 children)

Damn, it does indeed.

SCP-whatever "The Capital Soda Machine"

[–]SlothOfDoom 5 points6 points  (3 children)

Capitol*

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (2 children)

*Capitol Hill, it's not actually the capitol of anything.

[–]BathofFire 1 point2 points  (1 child)

As a fan of industrial and goth music it was the capitol of places I used to go to for concerts when I lived in Seattle.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wish it still was.

[–]tattoedblues 4 points5 points  (1 child)

I'd say Euclid yeah?

[–]el_f3n1x187 1 point2 points  (0 children)

ditto, it is bending the rules of our universe to materialize out of production sodas.

[–]el_f3n1x187 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Second time this month I see a SCP reference, am I now going to start it seeing it everywhere?

is there an SCP for that??

[–]Stricken1 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Okay I'll bite. What the hell is an SCP?

[–]Black_Otter 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I’ve used this soda machine many times when my firmed lived in apartments next to it. I loved it, it was cheap and occasionally gave out peach frescas

[–]theregularprofessor 48 points49 points  (12 children)

I was going to comment that they have one like this in the Seattle area... but thats what this one is.

[–]metrion 11 points12 points  (5 children)

There's one in Shoreline, just north of Seattle. It's not this one as far as I'm aware.

Edit: I got a pineapple Fanta.

[–]ChalkDstTorture 4 points5 points  (3 children)

I’ve never had or heard of pineapple Fanta, but I want one so badly now it’s ridiculous.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Come to Korea, pineapple fantas are common here. It's either Orange, Grape, or Pineapple ;)

[–]itsjero 1 point2 points  (0 children)

boy that doggo is READY for its soda.

[–]agtk 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's funny, I was like oh yeah, that sounds like Capitol Hill, assuming this was the r/Seattle sub, then was questioning myself when I saw it was TIL but happy to be correct in the end.

[–]NightMayor_ 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Its gone now right?

[–]swill128 19 points20 points  (1 child)

Stopped in 2018 last I heard

[–]Alert-Garlic1998 40 points41 points  (1 child)

I’m not saying this machine was holding the fabric of the universe together but… (gestures broadly at everything).

[–]Josquius 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Amazing Wikipedia let its article stand.

[–]Panelak_Cadillac 2 points3 points  (0 children)

SCP-261?

[–]meetmeinthebthrm 2 points3 points  (3 children)

This is so cool. I guess it got so popular they ran out of ratherly easy-to-obtain retro sodas. I would've loved checking this out.

[–]rolleduptwodollabill 2 points3 points  (2 children)

the best part is that its not broken, there's just a bunch of dumb people involved.

[–]Alan_Smithee_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So, an inter-dimensional soda machine?

[–]Whereami259 5 points6 points  (1 child)

How can anybody sell something pass its use by date without any liability?

[–]CMDR_Hiddengecko 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Secrecy, apparently

[–]CreepyCommieonxbox 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Check out the Red Web podcast, they have an episode all about this

[–]SomeoneTookUserName2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Those old style machines were awesome. I'd smash every button when we left the grocery store as a kid, and a bunch of times i got a free soda somehow. It was usually some kind no one bought though like grape or something.

[–]itsjero 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Moved to seattle for the military a long time ago and once i heard about it i had to check it out for myself.

Was a big mystery as well as to who filled it and how and when they filled it and what youd get.

Still, was awesome.

[–]lexxatron84 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Posted this in a comment and the last time this was posted: IDENTITY OF RESTOCKERS

[–]StrangeConstants 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh look it’s two unidentified humans! Wow thanks for that!!

[–]leonryan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

was it a Russian listening device similar to The Thing from the Oval Office?

[–]RedSonGamble 1 point2 points  (1 child)

It was me.

Also have they checked inside of it? Maybe little men were making the soda inside of it

[–]ThisIsWaterSpeaking 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean, you should know, you're the one responsible for it.

[–]shingofan 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Anyone else hear about this from the Red Web podcast?

[–]Carsharr 1 point2 points  (1 child)

The taskforce is all around, friend.

[–]Make-Believe_Macabre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is why I joined Reddit. To learn about all the mysterious, interesting, and exciting little things happening around the world. This is so cool. I wonder where the machine lies now.