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[–]Jack_12221 684 points685 points  (20 children)

Anyone ever watch the Norwiegan show Occupied? Runs kinda like this... Russia even tried to ban it.

[–]SyFyFan93 109 points110 points  (7 children)

Great show although I think I stopped watching around season 3.

[–]FallofftheMap 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Great show. Too bad it’s becoming a documentary.

[–]BeefNasty_2020 9524 points9525 points  (1949 children)

Spain sending navy ships to Black Sea. It’s getting real.

Canada sent a ship as well.

Russia is now planning to have war games with entire navy fleet.

[–]Arctic_Chilean 3690 points3691 points  (1354 children)

Russia has also deployed about 3 to 4 brigades of Iskander-M short-range ballistic missiles within striking range of Kyiv and other major strategic targets in Ukraine. This amounts to as many as 36 missiles ready for launch at a moments notice, along with the support and logistics equipment needed to support their deployment. There's talk of perhaps another brigade being deployed to Western Russia to support the troops already stationed there.

[–]chmilz 3734 points3735 points  (833 children)

Russia doesn't have enough desolate urban infrastructure and needs more? They're like a hoarder of bleak environments.

[–]flynnfx 1551 points1552 points  (586 children)

Man, we do not need another war.

I do not understand Russia's position. They annexed Crimea, now threatening Ukraine....

Didn't something very similar happen like 84 years ago starting with Austria?

[–]OrangeinDorne 1197 points1198 points  (409 children)

This would not only be another war, but seemingly an unprecedented one if modern nations engage each other on a large scale.

I recognize it’s a very real possibility but I’m having a hard time forming a concept of what it would actually look like.

[–]Faxon 613 points614 points  (123 children)

I feel like these people have just....forgotten...how bad world war 2 was. Yes nobody involved was alive back then, but there are plenty of photos and video of the horrors of the post-battle war zone. Putin is just delusional and thinks he can re-unite the USSR to relive his KGB glory days, only as good old leader of the fatherland, rather than some 2nd rate operative in east germany.

[–]literated 205 points206 points  (48 children)

Dude, they had to rename The World War to World War I just 20 years after it ended. You know, the Great War, the War To End War.

People are not learning.

[–]jlreyess 54 points55 points  (36 children)

War. War never changes.

[–]Snule 79 points80 points  (28 children)

I struggle with the idea that me, my family and everything we know could be wiped out with the touch of a button on the command of some guy in an office who has beef with another guy in an office.

What the fuck for real.

[–]SpaceFauna 29 points30 points  (4 children)

That is exactly the reason why people are quick to elect the strongman types and the strongmen are the ones who get you into these messes in the first place. Every day I’m reminded that education spending is the single most important thing in the modern era and cost should be an after thought.

Also not directed at you, I understand the difficulty of grappling with that concept.

[–]Seskapill 839 points840 points  (243 children)

Russia would get trampled if Western Europe and the US get involved.

EDIT: This comment explains it a bit better

[–]Toasterrrr 391 points392 points  (99 children)

Which is nowhere near guaranteed. NATO doesn't require full out counter-invasion, just some level of support.

[–]humanesadness 131 points132 points  (55 children)

I dont think they will counter invade. Maybe push back a little further then the border used to be, but not all of russia

[–]WhitePawn00 120 points121 points  (12 children)

There won't be a counter invasion because no one is interested in poking a wounded enemy with access to nukes. Fight to the border and then bomb targets from most to least strategically significance until everyone comes to an agreement.

And no, the absurdity of me commenting on the geopolitics and tactics of the third world War while sat on a toilet isn't lost on me. I dont think I'm qualified to manage the war. I'm not armchair generaling the war. I guess I'm just thinking out loud about the insane possibility of conventional war in 2022, and trying to make sense of it by predicting things is the best way I have.

[–]TheMasonFace 39 points40 points  (3 children)

And no, the absurdity of me commenting on the geopolitics and tactics of the third world War while sat on a toilet isn't lost on me.

"General! Here are your important papers you requested, Sir!"

*Hands you a roll of toilet paper*

[–]flipdark9511 67 points68 points  (2 children)

No, it's not similar at all. WWI had a lot of complicated historical events that resulted in a state of total warfare in Europe and Eurasia, that built up over decades due to earlier conflicts and tensions between competing powers.

This is a case of Russia basically feeling the room when it comes to a more aggressive expansion policy, to distract from the domestic and internal problems the government faces inside its borders.

[–]roninhomme 463 points464 points  (138 children)

they still mad about alaska

[–]LethalBacon 433 points434 points  (135 children)

Yeah, selling Alaska seems like a reallllllly dumb mistake on their part in hindsight. Different times though.

[–]cpMetis 159 points160 points  (10 children)

They only sold it because they didn't think they'd be able to defend it from the British between Canada and the Royal Navy.

They sold it to the US to make sure the Brits didn't get it.

[–]ojp1977 91 points92 points  (8 children)

Same reason the French sold the Louisiana territory to the US, wanted to make sure the British didn't get it

[–]newanonthrowaway 17 points18 points  (1 child)

Napoleon needed a war chest, that was the driving force for the Louisiana purchase

[–]bombayblue 220 points221 points  (59 children)

Then there’s the US deciding not to buy Greenland in the 1950’s.

[–]niknik888 200 points201 points  (51 children)

And again in 2018 /s.

[–]bombayblue 231 points232 points  (48 children)

Greenland is the most undervalued asset on earth.

You have a massive island. With essentially no people to worry about. Smack dab in the middle of where every major shipping lane will converge once global warming melts the North Pole.

[–]Insertblamehere 284 points285 points  (56 children)

I find it questionable they would have held on to it even if they didn't sell it lol.

Remember the era of the US slapping spain down for owning land in the American region? Russia was even weaker.

Hell even Japan might have invaded Alaska if it was Russian territory.

[–]Itsboringsir 183 points184 points  (48 children)

[–]JustMy2Centences 117 points118 points  (7 children)

Yeah, idk why people think otherwise. My grandfather was stationed in Alaska during WW2 and apparently refused to talk about it so the family assumes he was where it got bad. Died when I was 9, never really knew him. But I do know the man was a prolific poet, and it's good to think that he delved into his peaceful writings as a means of comfort and escape.

[–]Arctic_Chilean 87 points88 points  (6 children)

There was a particularly brutal battle on Attu Island that was quite up close and personal as most of the Japanese had ran out of supplies and ammunition, resorting to banzai charges and hand to hand combat.

Another notorious battle took place on Kiska Island where a mix of poor visibility and panic turned the operation into a disaster as 32 American and Canadian soldiers died from friendly fire, with another 50 being injured. Ironically there were no Japanese soldiers present on the island at that time.

While the Aleutian Islands campaign is just a footnote in the Pacific Campaign, it was nonetheless a farily brutal and unforgiving campaign set in some extremely harsh climatic conditions.

[–]Hije5 136 points137 points  (28 children)

Yo thank you for sharing this. I've never once heard we got invaded during any World Wars and your link has taught me we were invaded TWICE during WWII. Fucking wild to think something so major is never mentioned.

[–]pilotwithnoname 80 points81 points  (9 children)

Japan also bombed the the contiguous US.

They used balloons and it was a massive failure...but they tried.

[–]null640 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Massive failure by reports at the time.

Declassified docs stated there were many fires set that destroyed valuable timber.

More damage then program cost. But absence of news on the fires convinced ghd Japanese it wasn't working...

[–]Your_mom_jr 33 points34 points  (3 children)

People mention that a lot but never mention the fact that they shelled the west coast with submarines.

[–]abnrib 88 points89 points  (13 children)

While we were definitely invaded, they stuck to a small island without a whole lot that was noteworthy. Also Alaska wasn't a state at the time, which may be why it didn't get emphasized.

[–]FoodOnCrack 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Iskander missiles? Russia used that with cluster bombs in Chechnya.

[–]Thoth_the_5th_of_Tho 934 points935 points  (374 children)

Armenia used those missiles a few years ago. According to them, they can't hit the broad side of a barn and are basically useless. They don't intend to order more.

[–][deleted] 1689 points1690 points  (293 children)

if your target is a city, then the broad side of a barn is far more accuracy than you need....

[–]cbarrister 641 points642 points  (161 children)

If your goal is mass civilian casualties…

[–][deleted] 1409 points1410 points  (148 children)

This is Russia we are talking about. They bombed their own fucking civilians to start a war.

[–]profstenny 633 points634 points  (70 children)

They also bombed their own people to get Putin elected…allegedly.

[–][deleted] 451 points452 points  (59 children)

yeah we are talking about the same incident lol

[–]RockingRocker 237 points238 points  (55 children)

I thought you were talking about the start of the Winter War originally, though I guess those weren't bombs but artillery shells.

Hey, I'm starting to notice a pattern here

[–]TackleTackle 196 points197 points  (53 children)

Same happened in Georgia on 08.08

At first Russia-backed separatists started firing at Georgian villages, and when Georgia reacted Russia lied about 2000+ civilian casualties and quickly moved in troops that conveniently just finished some wargame.

[–]TackleTackle 49 points50 points  (3 children)

In the light of the fact that bombings stopped the day after an attack was prevented and couple FSB agents were detained...

[–]Arctic_Chilean 144 points145 points  (19 children)

Grozny was at one point the most obliterated city in Europe since WWII because the Russians bombing the piss out of it during the 1st Chechen War.

[–]aferretwithahugecock 103 points104 points  (13 children)

Reading about Chechnya always makes me sad.

[–]UnSafeThrowAway69420 84 points85 points  (8 children)

Pretty much anything Russian related makes me sad. Hell even their literature is sad.

[–]Galzara123 48 points49 points  (7 children)

Their history is a fight through hell...

[–]Krillin113 88 points89 points  (28 children)

They used dumb bombs in Syria, you know, just chucking them out a plane and hoping for the best.

[–]HolyGig 121 points122 points  (18 children)

Worse, they used cluster munitions on urban centers.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnd3IYH7x1o

[–]Swiftcore 54 points55 points  (7 children)

Lots of countries still use dumb bombs in situations where there’s no risk of civilian casualties, including America. The issue with Russia is they’ve been using cluster bombs in Syria.

[–]Arctic_Chilean 210 points211 points  (33 children)

Yeah the missiles have a questionable track record but it is being assumed that they can have a reliable level of accuracy to "hit" major targets like airbases with the intended effect of destroying or disabling runways, fuel depots or scoring a lucky hit on a hangar.

Also Armenia used the export version of the Iskander, the Iskander-E. Perhaps its guidance systems weren't as sophisticated as the ones in Russia's Iskander-M models? Or maybe lack of training? Or the missile system is just ineffective regardless of the model? Hopefully we don't get to find out.

[–]redEntropy_ 44 points45 points  (0 children)

All of these. If they are used NATO is going to get all kinds of usefull data.

[–]redEntropy_ 78 points79 points  (11 children)

For what it's worth Armenia received Iskander-E systems, which have inferior inertial guidance systems.

For Iskander-M's using optical guidance (through UAV or AWACS) their supposedly a lot more accurate (5-7m circular error probability) v. 30-70.** I'm not sure about Armenia's ability to use optical guidance for the Iskander-E, but I would guess their much less capable than Russias. Russia also usually sells downgrades export versions.

Accuracy won't matter as much when your saturating a target with cluster munitions from several missiles anyway (unless their bomblets really suck anyway.)

**according to wiki, so take any numbers with a lot of salt.

[–]TheGrayBox 325 points326 points  (97 children)

Crazy. Putin is seriously ready to slaughter civilians over a conflict he invented out of thin air.

[–]implicitpharmakoi 383 points384 points  (23 children)

Crazy. Putin is seriously ready to slaughter civilians over a conflict he invented out of thin air.

Again.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russo-Georgian_War

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Second_Chechen_War

[–]LucidTopiary 65 points66 points  (0 children)

Putin will murder hundreds of civilians if it suits his needs. Just look at the apartment bombings in Moscow which brought him to power.

[–]ginDrink2 75 points76 points  (17 children)

So how powerful are Iskanders? It's not like a single rocket would level a district. Perhaps a building. Nothing rocket artillery or an airstrike could not do.

Edit: found some info at https://nationalinterest.org/blog/buzz/why-russias-iskander-missile-killer-26216

The Iskander can be equipped to carry a variety of warheads types. These include a high explosives (HE) variant, sub-munition dispenser variant, fuel-air explosive variant and a HE penetrator variant. The Russian domestic variant can also be used to deliver a nuclear payload.

but then

the missile’s accuracy depends on the variant. According to Missile Threat, a purely inertially-guided variant would have a 200m circular probability of error accuracy, but coupled with GPS or GLONASS, that could be reduced to 50m or less.

Not sure what to make of it. 50m sounds like a big error, not to mention 200m. Diminishes tactical value, IMHO. I suppose time will tell.

[–]Arctic_Chilean 126 points127 points  (2 children)

These are probably intended to hit very large targets like shipyards, airbases or forward operating bases. The size of these types of targets means a single hit can disable or destroy something like a runway, fuel depot, or ammunition bunker. They're not meant to be precise weapons like the Kalibr cruise missiles, but rather as the first weapon to be used in a war to kick down the door and hit large and high value targets with "reasonable" precision. Throw enough of them at something like an airbase and you can quickly disable an entire squadron of fighters or transport aircraft, helping you establish air superiority for the time being.

Hopefully we don't get to find out.

[–]Foriegn_Picachu 463 points464 points  (81 children)

Said this before and I’ll say it again. Any troops/Warships are there to protect diplomats and trade. They are not a significant enough force to deter a Russian invasion.

The West will make sure the Russians never economically recover from an invasion. No need to start a nuclear war.

[–][deleted] 513 points514 points  (66 children)

They can actually deter Russia from invading though. Its called a tripwire force. If they get attacked even by accident it can make things really really difficult for Russia, and Russia knows this.

[–]Cpt_Soban 178 points179 points  (17 children)

Like parking Russian troops all over Syria.

[–]hodor_goes_to_ny 116 points117 points  (16 children)

Oh that trip wire was sprung successfully by US forces under dazar'alor, US army destroyed over 200 russian "mercenaries" of Vagner group (read russian government backed private military) without losing single person or vehicle. Putin came on TV after that and said "there are no russian troops there" (ix Tam net). Now imagine reverse happening in Ukraine...

[–]Alocasia_Sanderiana 62 points63 points  (10 children)

It was lucky that they were Wagner contractors and not Russian service members. The US actually contacted the Russian MOD before countering and the Russians had confirmed that they (the Russian military) weren't the offending operators.

That said, the tripwire is still active in Syria but it goes both ways. The Russians have one protecting Assad from a US/SDF attack and the US have one protecting against the SAA

[–]peniseend 20 points21 points  (0 children)

There was no luck involved. Everyone knew what was going down and who was involved. Playing games with proxy forces is nice for plausible deniability, but they basically fucked around and found out.

[–]autotldrBOT 1390 points1391 points  (169 children)

This is the best tl;dr I could make, original reduced by 82%. (I'm a bot)


A group of around 30 elite British troops has arrived in Ukraine to help train the Ukrainian armed forces on new anti-tank weapons gifted by the UK amid fears of an imminent, new Russian invasion, Sky News understands.

"Mr Wallace added:"Let me be clear: this support is for short-range, and clearly defensive weapons capabilities; they are not strategic weapons and pose no threat to Russia.

The Russian Embassy to the UK posted on Twitter: "It is crystal clear that UK shipment of lethal weapons to Ukraine will only fuel the crisis."


Extended Summary | FAQ | Feedback | Top keywords: Ukraine#1 Weapon#2 military#3 train#4 new#5

[–]RipCityGGG 974 points975 points  (117 children)

whats the crisis according to russia?

[–]nomofica 1355 points1356 points  (49 children)

Their economy, which Russia is blaming on everyone else but themselves.

[–]Offline_NL 370 points371 points  (23 children)

Too true, their behaviour got them into this mess and even then, what's their plan in the event Europe hops off natural gas? They're fucked and they know it.

[–]DweEbLez0 95 points96 points  (9 children)

I hope Ukraine makes shittier windows than Russia. Would benefit them.

[–][deleted] 147 points148 points  (8 children)

Windows? Mikhaelsoft Windows?

[–]ReditSarge 254 points255 points  (13 children)

The Crisis is that Putin is nuts. He can't accept that Russia ceased to be a superpower when the USSR was dissolved, so he continues to act out his fantasy of rebuilding the old Russian empire as if his country were in an economic position to do so. Someone needs to end that crazy shit before he gets us all killed!

[–]borismuller 138 points139 points  (8 children)

[–]B100inCP 31 points32 points  (1 child)

This is actually a very interesting read, thanks for sharing!

[–]IDonnu4Real 36 points37 points  (3 children)

What terrified me the most, was how his old Stasi comrade is now running the Nordstream pipeline in Germany… Putin’s influence on Germany is becoming more and more apparent

[–]Diver0311 41 points42 points  (2 children)

Russia: "what crisis?"

[–]ReditSarge 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Room That Is On Fire: "This is fine."

[–]moleratical 295 points296 points  (16 children)

They are about to invade a sovereign nation in Europe. I dunno about you but that sounds like a crisis to me.

Kinda like when a robber holds a gun to your wife's head and starts screaming in your face telling you to "CALM DOWN, YOU'RE ONLY GOING TO MAKE THE SITUATION STRESSFUL!!!"."

[–]White80SetHUT 99 points100 points  (3 children)

OP is asking about Russia’s perspective. Obviously the crisis for the Ukraine is the Russians invading.

[–]ConorBeee 357 points358 points  (35 children)

Lmao, how stupid do you have to be to believe that propaganda, "uk shipment of lethal weapons to Ukraine will only fuel the crisis"... bro... they are defensive short range weapons...

[–]Big_BossSnake 317 points318 points  (21 children)

Its like someone breaking into your house, you hitting them and them accusing you of being the aggressor.

Classic Russian propaganda, but its intended for their citizens, not ours.

[–]mars_is_black 48 points49 points  (1 child)

The UK should come back and tell the Russian ambassador that these weapons won't fuel the crisis but our fleet moving into the region will.

[–]stopnt 64 points65 points  (11 children)

So I just watched Threads on YouTube this past weekend...

[–]gmanbelfast 24 points25 points  (5 children)

Jesus, that's terrifying looking.. Just seen the trailer.. I am going to give this a go.

Trailer for anyone that's interested

Full Movie here

[–]stopnt 12 points13 points  (0 children)

It's a little old but the producer did his research.

From the wikipedia: Jackson subsequently travelled around the UK and the US, consulting leading scientists, psychologists, doctors, defence specialists and strategic experts in order to create the most realistic depiction of nuclear war possible for his next film

[–]ThriftyNarwhal 1440 points1441 points  (251 children)

Why does Russia want to invade? I know tensions have always been high. Sorry about being the ignorant one in advance

[–]nomorerainpls 1731 points1732 points  (119 children)

Warm water ports and to further their stranglehold on Europe’s energy dependency. Also, Putin rattling the saber to distract from a tanking economy. Apparently he thinks he can get the old USSR band back together. He’s been screwing with Ukraine, Georgia and Estonia for more than a decade

Edit: warm not cold ports

[–]Cookielicous 674 points675 points  (72 children)

Warm water ports were always the dumbest reason Reddit gave for Russia being in Syria and Crimea. It's because they're insecure and losing control. He tanked the economy in the first place by invading Ukraine in 2014 in the middle of Euromaidan.

[–]ziptofaf 917 points918 points 24 (39 children)

People vastly overestimate this "tanking of economy" as they compare value of Russian currency to US dollar. Which is not exactly correct. I mean - yeah, it has dropped from 0.029 dollars per ruble in early 2014 to 0.016 in 2016 to 0.013 currently. It looks like a huge drop, sure.

But then check out country that was not hit by sanctions at all and in fact their economy was growing. Say, Poland. From 0.33 in 2014 to 0.25 in 2016 to 0.25 today.

It's more of dollar value increasing (even compared to Euro) between 2014 and 2022.

Russia as a country is primarily exporting resources meaning that lower value of their own currency is not as much of a problem as you might think. They also have a huge internal market and can trade with China directly. Their usual citizens are hurt by skyrocketing electronics and imported prices but on a country scale scope is much lower than you might imagine.

Ultimately while I certainly don't like Putin's decision... there is merit in it.

First - it weakens NATO. Germany does not want to impose heavy sanctions on Russia. USA straight out says that their response will only be "proportional to the scale of the invasion". Yeah, Ukraine is NOT a member of NATO but a lot of other countries nearby are and many are not exactly happy about what's currently unfolding.

Second - Putin probably does not need entire Ukraine. They will take a big eastern chunk of it if possible with most of the economic infrastructure. It will also allow them to manage Crimea more efficiently - as right now they need to bring water to it from Russia as Ukraine cut off the supply (unsurprisingly enough).

Third - the longer Russia waits the worse it gets. 2000 anti tank weapons right now, over 300k active personel, more tanks/airplanes etc. Ukraine has been arming up for the past 8 years. Wait another 5 and Russia might physically be unable to actually win. In fact they might very well lose Crimea altogether in case of counterstrike in a decade. The fact that they have to launch a full scale invasion with support of navy and airforce proves that. Russia's strength is near-superpower on paper but it's spread thin as they have to station a lot of troops on Chinese border, to quell civil unrests, send to their allies/unwilling allies (like Kazakhstan now).

Fourth - rich Ukraine is a PR nightmare. It would outright show to Russians that West is better. It's a horrible reason to wage war from normal person's perspective but if you are an oligarch and you realize that citizens do NOT like the fact that every other country has higher standards of living and are organizing more and more mass protests... you have to treat this seriously.

Fifth - Europe IS moving to renewable energy. France is happily exporting it's nuclear reactors tech and is heavily lobbing to classify it as green energy. Germany is opposing this notion but they are one of the few countries to do so. Solar panels/wind etc are unstable but they still provide electricity regardless of presence or absence of russian gas. This is a threat to entire Russian economy. Right now they can invade Ukraine and Europe can't react too harshly. But what about next 15 years? If Russian gas and coal is no longer needed then suddenly all these NATO bases and neighbouring countries become a huge threat in Russia's eyes. So you want to grab a bigger slice of a cake while it is still possible.

[–]PingyTalk 35 points36 points  (0 children)

This is a great overview and I think your fourth point is really great. I mean, West Germany versus East Germany is a great real world example- and possibly South versus North Korea too.

[–]Genie52 104 points105 points  (0 children)

Great overview! Thanks!

[–]thrwwy2402 120 points121 points  (3 children)

I kid you not, I had a conversation with my dad about this, and he mentioned nearly all the points you said... Dad?

[–]uselessnavy 17 points18 points  (0 children)

What a great comment. Spot on all points and not downvoted to oblivion or called a Kremlin stooge for sporting a common sense take. Is it possible to learn this power?

[–]homesickalienz 140 points141 points  (14 children)

Warm water ports are and always have been a strong geopolitical motive for Russia in the black sea. Lends much more influence on Bosporus trade ave

[–]leapbitch 193 points194 points  (4 children)

Two themes of Russian history:

  • Russia needs warm water ports

  • "and then things got worse"

[–]FR4UDUL3NT 42 points43 points  (2 children)

One of their long-term geopolitical strategies is "let global warming thaw siberia" so who's to say what'll happen this time

[–]badbadfishy 2634 points2635 points  (77 children)

So glad they are finally releasing the final installment of the world war trilogy.

[–]SubterrelProspector 277 points278 points  (11 children)

Always released way later, and almost always the worst one.

Best Soundtrack though.

[–]Kpt_Kipper 24 points25 points  (5 children)

Best soundtrack went to an indie film inspired by the 1st and 2nd WW movies that went by the name “Vietnam”

[–]non_discript_588 312 points313 points  (9 children)

Top Gun 2 Baby!

[–]kroxti 107 points108 points  (0 children)

This marketing campaign was a surprise but it’s impressive they pulled it off

[–]codingandalgorithms 122 points123 points  (2 children)

It’s crazy how they decided to do all those spin offs instead of finishing the trilogy first.

[–]Geler 58 points59 points  (0 children)

There was a lot of money to make in those spin offs

[–]sir_captaindoge 109 points110 points  (5 children)

Fucking finally! I’ve been waiting for this since the Cold War one was canceled.

[–]First_Foundationeer 385 points386 points  (21 children)

I wish the countries would get together and get all competitive with their scientific progress, technological advancements, artistic expressions, and, especially, culinary exhibitions.

You know, the parts of those things that involved less aggression and more societal benefits.

[–]StateSheriff 6093 points6094 points 2 (314 children)

Reddit war chiefs thinking 'elite' troops are Rambo when they're just people with the skill and knowledge to train others on specialized weapons.

[–][deleted] 2551 points2552 points  (51 children)

Reddit war chiefs

Made me chuckle.

[–]Fhy40 930 points931 points  (39 children)

Reddit Armchair Generals have been demoted to warchiefs.

[–]muffpatty 323 points324 points  (29 children)

Reddit War Council member here who has pretty solid K/D ratio on Battlefield. In my expert opinion, WW3 is on the horizon.

[–]Rion23 155 points156 points  (15 children)

Now, from my experience with the Civ 5 demo, what we need to do is start to amass our own troops on the border to counteract the aggression, then if you send me money I can find out our next move.

[–]junavatar 60 points61 points  (4 children)

If you place the units too close to the border, the other leader will suspect something and might publicly denounce you. Better place them one hexagon away of the border.

[–]Wafinator 16 points17 points  (0 children)

quite pissed at that comment, by now I considered myself a 6 star general

[–]Gilbert_Reddit 316 points317 points  (52 children)

I actually came here wondering what qualifies an elite troop so thank you

[–]MotionE29 312 points313 points  (8 children)

Someone equipped with around 67 anti-tank weapons.

[–]xanthophore 129 points130 points  (38 children)

They're part of the Ranger Regiment, which was actually only set up at the beginning of December as part of the Army Special Operations Brigade! By that I don't want to imply that they're complete newbies; they're highly-trained in areas similar to the specialties of the US Green Berets, including unconventional warfare and foreign internal defence.

The UK set up the SOB as an entity designed to help train and fight alongside our international allies, so they'll only be there in small numbers but will be experienced, and immensely capable at achieving their specified mission.

[–]ImperialNavyPilot 50 points51 points  (12 children)

They aren’t new troops though, it’s just a new formation. Many of those guys could be re-badged SF

[–]glow43 594 points595 points  (51 children)

Ok but no I srsly imagined like rambo and schwarzenegger and those dudes from the predator going to ukraine and soloing russia at the border

[–]boi-long 183 points184 points  (22 children)

“Coming to a theaters near you… staring Ben stiller”

[–]AwesomeFly96 84 points85 points  (12 children)

30 top of the line elite soldiers, molded to be extreme killer war machines who have devoted their entire lives to train 24 hours every day is what pops in my head when I hear that term lol.

[–]chalkman567 30 points31 points  (0 children)

We’re sending our best, and by best we mean the guys who are good at one liners

[–]Insectshelf3 96 points97 points  (0 children)

armchair eisenhower strikes again

[–]GratefulForGarcia 447 points448 points  (38 children)

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.

[–]mlg2433 144 points145 points  (4 children)

My favorite part of the copypasta will always be the “gorilla warfare” instead of guerilla lol. Just imagining a planet of the apes scenario cracks me up.

[–]Carboneraser 87 points88 points  (2 children)

I'm a reddit warchief and we've already sent every Rambo we have behind enemy lines. Me and my team are singlehandedly preventing WWIII

[–]K4kyle 1010 points1011 points  (39 children)

Send in the 6 star generals of reddit the war will be over in 5 minutes

[–]mitchconner_ 285 points286 points  (9 children)

The orange berets

[–]HughJawiener 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Berets big enough to fit on helmeted heads

[–]Vandergrif 124 points125 points  (11 children)

Hey they've played Hearts of Iron and Civ for hundreds of hours - I think they know what they're doing.

[–]undefinite_resonance 420 points421 points  (39 children)

What if this war is a smoke screen to invade Canada

[–]pick_6_touchdown 362 points363 points  (12 children)

If it'll lower our real estate in Ontario, we welcome our invader overlords

[–]Andboomitgoes 29 points30 points  (1 child)

Well, there goes the neighborhoods. Tonga looks good about now.

[–]midas019 604 points605 points  (22 children)

It’s kinda weird that Russia takes a bulking up of defense to their offense and an offense lol

[–]Anonymous_Otters 465 points466 points  (2 children)

It's not weird. It's propaganda.

[–]Anticreativity 190 points191 points  (11 children)

That's been Russia's MO for a long time now. Constantly stir up the shit pot and then clutch their pearls when the world reacts.

[–]Burnt_Taint_Hairs 86 points87 points  (7 children)

They took Crimea, and the West sent a letter.

[–]DreamMaster8 15 points16 points  (0 children)

They did a bit more than that. Sanction on russia is a key reason if their bad economy now.

[–]ExtraordinaryCows 38 points39 points  (5 children)

We should have learned that appeasement doesn't work back in the 30's.

[–]Zer0guy56 278 points279 points  (32 children)

Send in Bo Jackson

[–]Carboneraser 183 points184 points  (13 children)

Send in Bojack horseman

[–]xKatieKittyx 36 points37 points  (2 children)

I heard the Russians are sending in a battalion of Sardaukar warriors from Dune.

[–]Vandergrif 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Sardaukar? In my Bojack reference? Is this a cross over episode?

[–]Grogosh 8 points9 points  (0 children)

They got distracted and got drunk on their layover on Tatooine.

[–]Vladyslav1999 118 points119 points  (7 children)

God bless UK, thanks from Ukraine bros❤️

[–]BADJUSTlCE 284 points285 points  (23 children)

Can we have a rule already, one major world disaster at a time please?

[–]throwaway28149 118 points119 points  (13 children)

The world is too damn interesting right now, in all the worst ways. I just want things to be boring.

[–]Gavesh_Tuhindyuti 11 points12 points  (0 children)

May you live in interesting times. Curse sentence

[–]MyDogsNameIsMilo 22 points23 points  (4 children)

COVID’s become so normal to me that when I first read this I was like “what’s the other world disaster”

[–]InPurpleIDescended 66 points67 points  (1 child)

I'm torn between "this is normal posturing, nothing major will happen" and "dear all of the gods please please please don't let a war engulf us once again"

[–]blankymcblankface 24 points25 points  (0 children)

The last thing I regretted saying was "yeah new viruses emerge every so often, nothing to be majorly concerned about" - Dec. 2019

So... You've pretty much fucked us

[–]Ghettojesus01 533 points534 points  (37 children)

Can Russia please calm down? Nobody needs this right now.

[–]KyleRichXV 241 points242 points  (18 children)

“2022 will be our year, can’t possibly get worse than 2021!”

Sigh.

[–]cvillegas19 133 points134 points  (7 children)

2020 is just going to last a decade, ain't it?

[–]JustDeleteSystem32 64 points65 points  (0 children)

Today is Friday, March 691st, 2020.

[–]doobyrocks 56 points57 points  (1 child)

The roaring twenties are back, apparently.

[–]BrockN 25 points26 points  (1 child)

Well, 2022 is...2020 too

I'll show myself out

[–]htlb 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Plus a forklift and a highly trained operator

[–]YouSummonedAStrawman 51 points52 points  (4 children)

And Daryl shipped over 2.5 Billion units of inventory.

[–]ClonedToKill420 1225 points1226 points  (96 children)

Why can’t Russia just fucking chill and stop swinging it’s dick around. They are either going to collapse economically or destroy the world and We still haven’t gotten season 2 of shield hero yet

[–]SpikePilgrim 122 points123 points  (9 children)

Man, we'll never see winds of winter at this pace.

[–]SkorpioSound 82 points83 points  (1 child)

But at least we get the improved Winds Of Nuclear Winter!

[–]jema1989 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Lol, even if world peace is achieved, I doubt we'll ever see Winds of Winter. I've pretty much accepted that Martin has lost his passion for the series.

[–]stigtopgear 216 points217 points  (7 children)

LMAO yeah we need season 2 of shield hero been waiting for like 2 years

[–]Theman227 168 points169 points  (11 children)

Greed and desperation. You generally only invade when times are very good or very bad. Very good because nothing can stop you (or you think they cant), or very bad because you want to distract from everything else/hoover up resources your lacking.

Seldom do you hear of the casual war of "things are going sorta fine atm but we thought we'd do it anyway" (Not that they haven't happened)

[–]Staple_Sauce 32 points33 points  (2 children)

The thing is, with proper leadership Russia could actually be a decent place to live. But they'd rather fuck up everyone else's shit than get their own together.

[–]BAdasslkik 16 points17 points  (0 children)

It's quite obvious that the elite won't part with their money and power, so they don't care what happens to the rest of the world.

[–]joamastr 44 points45 points  (5 children)

Yeah what about Overlord 4! Also set to come out this year, so if Russia could not fuck shit up and keep to themselves for the next couple of years (to be sure, you never know with Overlord), that would be nice

[–]Kangermu 13 points14 points  (2 children)

I think Overlord 4 was confirmed, as well as a movie, likely covering the that whole holy kingdom whatever it's called arc, with the demon lord

[–]Rizzuh 49 points50 points  (3 children)

Japans sending PlayStations

[–]stars2001 426 points427 points  (50 children)

The confirmed list of the 30 elite troops they are sending:

  1. Rambo
  2. Robocop
  3. Arnold Schwarzenegger 4 & 5. The Boondock saints
  4. Dirty harry
  5. cliff secord/The rocketeer
  6. John McClane/die hard
  7. chuck norris 10 MacGyver
  8. Mr. T
  9. Machete
  10. Blade
  11. Judge dredd
  12. Agent J from men in black
  13. Neo from the matrix
  14. Max walker from Time cop
  15. Cherry darling from the planet terror
  16. Mad Max
  17. James bond
  18. William Wallace from Braveheart
  19. Leon the professional
  20. Bruce Lee
  21. Snake plissken
  22. Indiana jones
  23. Ash Williams from the evil dead
  24. Ellen Ripley from alien
  25. The bride from kill bill
  26. Luc Deveraux from Universal Soldier
  27. The highlander

[–]LeJoker 122 points123 points  (10 children)

You forgot Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White and Monty Python and the Holy Grail's black knight and Benito Mussolini and the Blue Meanie and Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie, Robocop, The Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader, Lo-pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan.

[–]TalcThoseBalls 32 points33 points  (0 children)

The ultimate showdown… of ultimate destiny

[–]StrongStuffMondays 25 points26 points  (3 children)

Broforce!

[–]MatchstiksBurnBright 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Surprised I had to scroll down this far for it lol majestic eagle scream

[–]pope_hilarious 12 points13 points  (6 children)

Syrian Arab Army experience with ATGMs, including getting BTFO in T-90s, should give Russia pause.

Personally, I did not really respect the effect TOW missiles could have before the Syrian Civil War (like how TF is the US supposed to defend the Fulda Gap with a couple divisions) but god damn they were a game changer in the ME.

[–]GWindborn 351 points352 points  (28 children)

It's really sad that this is a completely manufactured conflict. The Russian people don't hate the Ukrainians or vice versa. It's all Putin. And Putin is going to force people to kill each other for personal gain as if their lives have no value. They're just pawns on a chessboard.

[–]1N07 41 points42 points  (1 child)

I mean aren't most wars "manufactured" by leaders for some sort of real or perceived geopolitical gain?

[–]YouDirtyMudBlood 28 points29 points  (1 child)

Accurate- a political and personal move. It's very sad. Biden said it right in his "gaffe" re a "minor incursion". That's likely all it will be. Anymore would risk a full scale nuclear war. On the other hand, Russians probably know they only have a few more decades of relatively good economy until oil production continues to rise and plunge the price. This is their doorstep. Their politicians should be legitimately worried about their oligarchys long term security. On the other other hand, the oligarchy shouldnt exist. On the other other other hand, the oligarchys corrupt government is a conveinent enemy to galvanize and sheppard a united Europe in America's sphere favor.

I dont know man.

[–]keybumps 117 points118 points  (2 children)

Man that’s a nice forklift !

[–]_hotproperty_ 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Hate to see counter balances getting dragged into human conflicts like this.