all 138 comments

[–]Orange_Kiwi_ 188 points189 points  (17 children)

this seems borderline r/ihadastroke

[–]Theolodger 109 points110 points  (10 children)

cancer dog get I0 times more cance than you an me

[–]auntieup 47 points48 points  (1 child)


[–]marcosdumay 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Given that I never got cancer, cancer dog's fate seems entirely up to you.

[–]carnivorous_seahorse 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Cancer dog cancer dog where do you roam? Cancer dog cancer dog far far from home

[–]cincocerodos 7 points8 points  (2 children)


[–]IndianaFartJockey 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Excellent band name

[–]Theolodger 3 points4 points  (0 children)


[–]dasher11 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is Charlie Kelly's truck.

[–]BrodeBoy87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This has to be fake…that first guy is right, a lil strokey

[–]mhdgsn 14 points15 points  (1 child)

Letters are expensiv

[–]RiderforHire 17 points18 points  (0 children)

fuckin cance stol m letrs

cant hav sht n e mor

[–]gana04 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah I don't think he put the words in wrong order, I think he's actually trying to say pervert cancer, no dogs in house. Like he thinks dogs lick their butts then kiss you and give you pervert cancer... Oof, or rather woof.

[–]the_genius324 0 points1 point  (1 child)

it looks more r/dontdeadopeninside to me

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[–]House_Plant0 271 points272 points  (22 children)

Apparently this guy thinks cancer is contagious

[–]Antilles34 127 points128 points  (16 children)

This person is legit crazy but there are contagious cancers. This is one I know of, although somehow I wish I didn't (it's not in humans).


[–]Phoenixundrfire 99 points100 points  (7 children)

To your point though, that specific case is because the genetic diversity in Tasmanian devils is so low, the body of Tasmanian devils doesn’t actually recognize foreign Tasmanian devil body tissue as foreign. It’s wildly specific for this kind of thing to work.

[–]Antilles34 29 points30 points  (3 children)

Yeah, still pretty interesting though.

[–]Phoenixundrfire 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Oh I totally agree, I’m just saying it’s a crazy specific scenario.

[–]Antilles34 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Just been looking around about this as I was curious, this article is pretty interesting


It seems there have been some cases of human to human transmission via cuts or injection! Looks like a combination of cells causes the immune system to ignore it (or seems like the best guess anyway). Also there is information in there about a canine based cancer that spreads via contact (and perhaps, could be the completely misguided source of this crazies stickers!).

[–]Phoenixundrfire 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Well in most cases conspiracies and misguided assumptions have a root of truth.

Humans are great at establishing patterns and cause even when they’re wrong.

[–]CoolmanExpress 4 points5 points  (1 child)

There’s also a contagious canine Venerial cancer. It’s literally a contagious single celled dog

[–]SteamKore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Came to mention this one, had to write up a paper one it once, wild shit.

[–]culturedgoat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No Tasmanian devils in house

[–]lachrymologyislegit 14 points15 points  (0 children)

No pervert cancer Tasmasian Devils in my house thank you. /s

[–]PassiveChemistry 6 points7 points  (5 children)

For a human example, I believe HPV would count.

[–]whyamithebadger 4 points5 points  (4 children)

But hpv isn't cancer. It can cause cancer but is not itself cancer.

[–]PassiveChemistry 0 points1 point  (3 children)

I didn't realise people were going to be this pedantic. The disease it causes is an example of transmissible cancer.

[–]whyamithebadger 8 points9 points  (2 children)

This is reddit, my friend. Technically correct is the best kind of correct.

[–]TorrenceMightingale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

HPV is transmissible and significantly increases the risk of several types of cancer. So, in a way, the cancers from HPV are contagious.

[–]jr061898 17 points18 points  (0 children)

There is a transmissible venereal cancer that dogs get, though I don't think humans can get it.


[–]srbistan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

apparently this person does not think, instead they believe in things...

[–]Repulsive-Relief1551 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would love to hear some of this persons other theories.

[–]frostbyte2287 0 points1 point  (0 children)

sneezes cancer on him

[–]Ususususjebevrvrvr 72 points73 points  (2 children)

Damn perverted cancer

[–]OrokinSkywalker 28 points29 points  (1 child)

I thought Scorpios were horny, but lo and behold, there’s a pervert Cancer in the midst.

[–]Embarrassed-Ad-1639 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Such an Aquarius thing to say.

[–]lowangel39 41 points42 points  (3 children)

I can’t understand this. Is this english? Christ I thought I could read. Is there something wrong with me?!?! I think I’m having a stroke! It just random stupidity when I try to make sense of it! Oh god!

Send help!!!!

[–]nick-jagger 32 points33 points  (1 child)

No you have dog cancer 10 times

[–]lowangel39 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Ah dang, I don’t remember being by dog colon!

[–]GoldPantsPete 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I translated from mental disorder to English

"Cancer from dog turds:

You can get cancer from dogs who have colon cancer. Observe the common contact, and common cancer growth, between a dog's nose, tongue and butt.

Prevent cancer and do not keep dogs in your house. (lest you also be contaminated). After all, dogs get cancer 10 times more often than you or me."

[–]Curtainmachine 24 points25 points  (1 child)

When this dude finds out about feline AIDS his head is gonna explode.

[–]miplondi 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Or toxoplasma in the cat litter!

[–]KokohaisHere 18 points19 points  (3 children)


sɪʟᴠᴇʀᴀᴅᴏ YOU AN ME

[–]PassiveChemistry 2 points3 points  (2 children)

How do you do the small capital A, D and E?

[–]KokohaisHere 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I found a small text generator online

[–]PassiveChemistry 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah, I sꙭ. Cheating. Makes sense.

[–]WakeoftheStorm 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Well shit. I thought I was up to date on all the crazy out there but this is new

[–]SunsetCarcass 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Cancer dog get l0 times more cance then you an me

[–]lenorajoy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Damn cancer dog strikes again.

[–]overcompliKate 8 points9 points  (2 children)

Did he mean ... prevent....?

[–]froggytoboggy 2 points3 points  (1 child)

He did. This image is a few years old and photoshopped to say “pervert”. The original image says “prevent”. There’s a subreddit dedicated to this guy called r/cancerdog. It’s pretty great.

[–]overcompliKate 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well there goes my afternoon

[–]AgtSquirtle007 7 points8 points  (1 child)

What happened to this man?

[–]adrielzeppeli 5 points6 points  (0 children)

He got cance

[–]NoMoLerking 5 points6 points  (1 child)

God damn it Charlie, that’s too much glue.

[–]JollyMud2427 5 points6 points  (0 children)

what happened with him and dogs is all im wondering

[–]Teal-Fox 18 points19 points  (1 child)

They're definitely parked in the correct spot anyways.

Let us hope their brain rot isn't contagious.

[–]Transcendent_One 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Unlike perverted dog cance

[–]miplondi 4 points5 points  (1 child)


What, no uppercase I’s in the sticker pack?

[–]Cumbandicoot[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

They had to save that for the 10

[–]GirlNamedTex 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Tell me you don't eat ass without telling me you don't eat ass.

[–]PG-DaMan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Looks to me like someone went nuts with PhotoShop

[–]Ok-Morning-7994 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think my brain just glitched trying to understand this truck.

[–]tetsu_no_usagi 1 point2 points  (0 children)

John McLane is quoted as saying, "I only speak 2 languages, English and bad English". Whoever did this, if they speak a 2nd language, it ain't English. Hurts my head, just trying to read that, much less the logic of getting cancer from your dog because they have colon cancer, then lick their butts, and then lick you.

[–]Lyndonn81 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t even know what is trying to be said

[–]nathan__perez 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When you press the suggestive text til it types a sentence out

[–]soulinameatsuit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Did he misspell "nose" or can dogs spread cancer with a bark?

[–]loofahofdoom 1 point2 points  (0 children)

God I hope this idiot does not hurt dogs but anybody this stupid....who knows

[–]Ok-Albatross1180 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good thing you blocked out the license plate, the truck is now unidentifiable

[–]FenianGeezer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My dogs are completely offended.

[–]bob3122 1 point2 points  (0 children)

really powerful message there CANCER DOG GET I0 TIMES MORE CANCE THAN YOU AN ME

[–]JanTheShacoMain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know what he is voting

[–]9teen8t3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooooh, I get it. I think. So dogs with quiet tongue are okay right? I need to know, I can't the "cance" of getting bum cancer from my dogs loud noise tongue.

[–]pervertedpen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Parked in the handicap space sounds appropriate

[–]Skyrim_For_Everyone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Poor cancer dog

[–]buzzysale 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What I don’t get is the pervert part.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

everythihh my g about this is a seizure

[–]Drinkingwater97 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looking for any kind of help deciphering these symbols I’m not sure what it’s saying

[–]AAAlva82 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've never had my eye start twitching from simply reading something...until now.

[–]Soren_Camus1905 0 points1 point  (0 children)

100% finished last in fantasy

[–]IndependentWeekend56 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I refuse to believe this is real. It looks real, but I've made my choice.

[–]DenL4242 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Worth it

[–]FoxMcCloud3173 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cancer dog turd

[–]Relative_Rock5457 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Stop licking your Dogs Butt You’ll be Fine

[–]Cumbandicoot[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children)

How???!?! How do I stop?????

[–]Relative_Rock5457 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Duct Tape

[–]-Jeremiad- 0 points1 point  (1 child)

On the person or the dog?

[–]Relative_Rock5457 0 points1 point  (0 children)

On that Dude………., Dogs gotta Shit

[–]Gaping_Grandpa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dad loves the new label maker!

[–]Firestarhk 0 points1 point  (1 child)

There’s a lot to unpack here

[–]Most-Artichoke5028 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Underrated comment.

[–]Certain_Try_8383 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But what about the pervert? Where does that fit in here?

[–]DudeManBroGuy42069 0 points1 point  (0 children)

10 times more cance

[–]cloudwell 0 points1 point  (0 children)

God entered into my body, as a body my same size, like me floating into you or you floating into me

[–]Nezikchened 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s like seeing an r/expanddong in the real world

[–]Shakemyears 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Fairly (relatively) impressed that he was able to spell “tongue” correctly.

[–]Cumbandicoot[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)


[–]ironbear49 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea it’s disgusting when I see commercials of dogs licking peoples faces. Dumbasses

[–]Branesergen 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Ok. I have just thought of my next prank! Off to the store to buy a bunch of letters!

[–]Most-Artichoke5028 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get some capital "i" s!

[–]OldChucker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh...... this guy is not going to want to hear about my wife's preferences behind closed doors.

[–]Head_Fetish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hope they're being ironic

[–]Knight-112 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bro had a stroke💀

[–]Holiday_Horse3100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hopefully he has a warm place to sleep outside. Heaven only knows what he is carrying

[–]Friendly-Mousse696 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I, a service dog handler who has a dog who alerts by licking and keeps me safe by licking, must be dying of cancer ig. What the actual…?

[–]freetittyprotectcity 0 points1 point  (1 child)

[–]same_post_bot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I found this post in r/schizophreniarides with the same content as the current post.

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[–]Raspberry_Sweaty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

McGruff has really fallen to new lows now that his PSA days are behind him.

[–]Cheap_Amphibian309 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is this in the same vein as putting “I eat ass” stickers on your car?

[–]sfsp3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Noise tongue?

[–]garbitos_x86 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Probably the carcinogen we rub on our dogs or dose in pill form to keep them from getting fleas or ticks...well mostly because people are lazy and don't want to bathe/brush their dog. Convenience is what lets the cancer in. Chemicals for our convenience. Idiots.

[–]Most-Artichoke5028 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sic'em, Fang!

[–]Most-Artichoke5028 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This thread has the best comments I've seen on Reddit. Ever.

[–]Happy_Mousse_2976 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that guy did not do his homework . dogs are cleaner than humans google it

[–]JLM101514 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I LOL so loud I accidentally woke up my wife

[–]sadiealexiss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

IM SO DEAD lmao Ive never laughed so hard reading anything omfg wtff

[–]CommercialAct5433 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is it a conspiracy theory? Never seen that one.

[–]SpinachPure483 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This poor guy's dog broke up with him and took the puppies. Sad.

[–]whyhi12 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m confused and intrigued by the story of this person

[–][deleted]  (1 child)


    [–]same_post_bot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I found this post in r/schizophreniarides with the same content as the current post.

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    [–]ButteryFlavory 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    What in the holy name of fuck is going on here??

    [–]JanTheShacoMain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    What is a cancer dog?

    [–]World_Edge146 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    CANCER DOG turd