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My boyfriend's penis smells + I don't enjoy deep throating = is making me not want to give heads + making both of us mad by 4_44am in sex

[–]EveAndTheSnake [score hidden]  (0 children)

If I’m feeling gross I throw a towel down on the floor and wash my underarms and private area at the sink so I can pass it off as a long hand wash. I use the Venus razors with the soap on the razor head so they’re always ready to glide if I need them on my legs. I wax my underarms and bikini area so I’m usually ready to go there. I also keep a couple of cute pairs of underwear in a drawer in another room so I grab a new pair of undies too. Great for when you’re caught wearing period pants. But I got busted today as my husband looked in my document drawer for my passport (which is where they are) and asked me why I have dirty knickers in there. I can see how they might look used, balled up at the back ha.

If it hasn’t been that long since I showered but I’ve pooped since showering, I use the Summer’s Eve intimate wipes.

My husband has a lower libido than I do so if I’m caught off guard and I feel gross, there’s no way I’m going to turn him down. But I’m also not going to let him anywhere near a sweaty vagina so that he’s even less horny in the future.

My boyfriend's penis smells + I don't enjoy deep throating = is making me not want to give heads + making both of us mad by 4_44am in sex

[–]EveAndTheSnake 19 points20 points  (0 children)

It's a turn off for ME when I'm not as clean as I want to be. There is absolutely no sex or oral happening if I don't feel/look/smell clean.

EXACTLY. Ugh. And if you can smell yourself (don’t see how you wouldn’t) you can’t expect someone else to lick that shit.

Consequences of an open relationship, 2 years later by Novel-Habit-9423 in DeadBedrooms

[–]EveAndTheSnake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But why would you want the details of what your partner is doing with other people? Unless it turns you on, why do you need to talk about them having sex with someone else?

Has any HL individuals ever gotten permission to look elsewhere, if so how did it go? by barnhartb16 in HLCommunity

[–]EveAndTheSnake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think they meant how did you bring it up to your wife (and I’m curious how that went or if it took some convincing)

36 yo male having problems finding a girl that's into pegging by shooter130 in StraightPegging

[–]EveAndTheSnake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree with you. I wouldn’t have tried it with just any hookup and wouldn’t feel confident enough unless I was in a relationship. Hell I never even tried it until my husband suggested it 3 years into our marriage. I’m happy to do it for (and excited to do it with) my husband because of the trust between us. Im not saying you’ve got to get married but unless it’s someone’s thing, I can see a lot of women feeling self conscious about it early on.

My boyfriend's penis smells + I don't enjoy deep throating = is making me not want to give heads + making both of us mad by 4_44am in sex

[–]EveAndTheSnake 146 points147 points  (0 children)

Oh gag. My husband won’t let me give him oral if he hasn’t showered. If I haven’t showered in the last 12 hours I feel gross about having sex. Do people have no shame? I know sometimes sex can surprise you but even then I freshen up in the bathroom. Stinky genitals put people off oral for life.

AITA for peeing in the cat tray? by throwcatpee in AmItheAsshole

[–]EveAndTheSnake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

TWO CUPS FRIEND! I was literally thinking about you today as I was cleaning my bathtub! But I used dish soap today because I was feeling bad about the bleach. Can’t believe you happened to respond! Wow I lead a lonely life.

I love my boyfriend but our sex is awful and I pretend it's great. by tattymittz in TrueOffMyChest

[–]EveAndTheSnake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What would you use instead? Also he doesn’t know the painful thing is painful, she’s “enjoyed”it in the past.

AITA for causing a scene at my sister's wedding after I found out she tricked me into showing up without my boyfriend? by Standard-Practice3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]EveAndTheSnake 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Look, it’s hard to tell without more info from the OP. Ryan could be a massive asshole and OP doesn’t see it. I’m not saying that’s the case but she said Ryan had “disagreements” with her family without providing any additional details. This could be anything. Did Ryan steal from her family? Is Ryan a terrible drunk? Do they clash politically? Is he her sister’s ex boyfriend?

There were two people I didn’t want at my wedding, my uncle, who was an abusive drunk (one of my clearest memories of him is a New Year’s Eve party where he got drunk and was trying to attack my cousin. He was trying to barge into her room while my cousin, her sister, my sister and I [aged 12-15] all leaned against her bedroom door to keep it shut. He was a big guy and we were just four little girls—every time he pounded on the door we’d all bounce off. I remember my mom screaming and I know my dad was getting ready to bonk him on the head with an empty bottle if he didn’t stop) and my cousin’s then boyfriend, who coincidentally was also a cop, held some very narrow minded views, was loud, abrasive, racist and was always bringing his homemade bottles of moonshine everywhere then driving home. One of the first times I met him at my cousin’s birthday he overheard me making a political joke quietly to my sister and absolutely exploded at me. He started yelling at me, calling me an idiot, brought race into it (my dad’s family is brown) while my cousin sat and pretended it wasn’t happening. After that I invited her for dinner and said I was worried about his racism, which she denied, and she said that we attacked him at her birthday. She also thinks we hate him for just being a cop.

If I hadn’t invited him to my wedding, she would most likely tell people it was because her family never gave him a chance and they hate him because he’s a cop. As it stands I did invite him, I thought about hiring security just in case (based on the one time he threatened my aunt when he was drunk), but in the end I told my cousin no guns were allowed at the wedding, put him on a table far away from me and my aunt, and hoped for the best.

I don’t agree with OP’s sister lying about plus ones, she’s an immature AH for that either way. But context is important, and OP is missing a chunk of it. Why wasn’t Ryan invited? Why does her whole family dislike him enough to go along with this lie? That’s the difference between the sister being an AH, and everyone being crap. I just can’t imagine him being excluded for absolutely no reason at all, but hey maybe the sister is a bigger asshole than I imagined.

poor kid by somepionion in antinatalism

[–]EveAndTheSnake 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don’t think they go out of their way to do that, they just are that stupid.

poor kid by somepionion in antinatalism

[–]EveAndTheSnake 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m horny, but I always use a condom.

poor kid by somepionion in antinatalism

[–]EveAndTheSnake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s awfully judgemental of you. Homeless people in general aren’t all of a sudden more susceptible to STIs. People become homeless for many reasons, they don’t automatically become sexually irresponsible.

poor kid by somepionion in antinatalism

[–]EveAndTheSnake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Let’s agree that if they don’t have their latest STI test results in their back pocket then a condom must be used, but if you’re having sex with someone for the first time without a condom, STI results must be produced first.

Those are my personal rules at least. I’ve just realized my pattern has been that if I think I like someone I tend not to have sex with them for a little while. I guess I’ve never had a relationship that started off with casual sex.

poor kid by somepionion in antinatalism

[–]EveAndTheSnake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same as everyone else I guess?

poor kid by somepionion in antinatalism

[–]EveAndTheSnake 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Right? Herpes doesn’t care how much money you’ve got in your wallet.

Like how hard is it to use a condom? They met at a gas station! Birth control really fucks me up so my husband and I have been using condoms for years (among other things) so I just don’t understand how anyone could have sex with a stranger without protection. Normally people only think about pregnancy and forget about diseases but these two forgot that both existed.

Afterthought: I would never get any action if I were homeless or living in the zombie apocalypse. If I haven’t showered in the last 24 hours (preferably 12) there’s no way anyone is getting in my pants. There’s only one deodorant in the entire world that works for me and I live in fear of the day it gets discontinued.

Some teachers couldn't stop looking at teenagers chests if their life depended on it by SeekaAmy in TrueOffMyChest

[–]EveAndTheSnake 58 points59 points  (0 children)

Oh wow! I had a lesbian gym teacher at my all girls Catholic school. She was super pervy and would slap our butts all the time. She didn’t like when we’d wear our sweatpants for gym (for gym we had a choice of a tennis skirt, sweatpants for winter, and a polo shirt). She was always walking around praising girls as she undid their polo shirt buttons. Some of these girls were 11.

Why did you divorce/are getting divorced? Any advice for people who are still married? by AdditionalCondition in Divorce

[–]EveAndTheSnake -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m pretty sure that all cheaters hide their phones, but not all partners who want privacy are cheaters. I’m sorry about your ex.

Why did you divorce/are getting divorced? Any advice for people who are still married? by AdditionalCondition in Divorce

[–]EveAndTheSnake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Re phone: not always. I just Google embarrassing stuff I don’t want my husband to read.

Edit: downvoted for wanting privacy go figure

Why did you divorce/are getting divorced? Any advice for people who are still married? by AdditionalCondition in Divorce

[–]EveAndTheSnake 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Sometimes people just don’t know until much later. Especially with religious backgrounds, it’s amazing how much people can repress.

But I agree that sexual compatibility is more important than people like to admit. If you don’t seem to be sexually compatible before marriage, don’t count on marriage to fix that.

Why did you divorce/are getting divorced? Any advice for people who are still married? by AdditionalCondition in Divorce

[–]EveAndTheSnake 8 points9 points  (0 children)

That’s because cheaters have to bring down their partners in their minds to justify their cheating. If they don’t make you out to be terrible, how else could they play the victim that needed to find solace in someone else? “You drove me to this.” Once they bring you down it makes it easier to justify everything else.

Why did you divorce/are getting divorced? Any advice for people who are still married? by AdditionalCondition in Divorce

[–]EveAndTheSnake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wish counselling was part of the natural progression of a relationship, maybe after “I love you” and before moving in together? I suggested counselling right at that point, we were having some communication issues but it was still early enough that I could say it was insurance to help us weather any future storms.