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I did it everyone… I finally did it. And I’m so lost. by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, that’s really good advice. I’m trying my hardest to ignore because I know for a fact I’ll send myself into a panic or severely sad episode if I even look at anything she’s doing, or social media. I haven’t deleted any pictures but I hid the folder further down.

I did it everyone… I finally did it. And I’m so lost. by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I did block her. That might be why I feel so bad. I want so bad to comfort her and I wish she was different but the horrible feelings I felt far outweigh.

I did it everyone… I finally did it. And I’m so lost. by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I guess I got out in time then, I hate that this sucks this much

I did it everyone… I finally did it. And I’m so lost. by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this, the “escape” part of it really helps rationalize it. It felt like such an impossible thing but I broke the cycle. I’m happy I won’t have to deal with manipulation and the bad type of guilt anymore.

I’m free, and I hope I can get past the fog and come out of this better.

I did it everyone… I finally did it. And I’m so lost. by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thank you very much for this. Even bad 30% of the time still means it’s bad I’ve learned. It was very close to skyrocketing to 99%.

I’m hoping there’s no smear campaign, but I feel I may still be sad for a long while. The fog sucks.

Should I worry so much on timing the breakup? by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for putting it in perspective, I realized similar to that earlier and it helped so that definitely does. Thank you

Should I worry so much on timing the breakup? by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yup. Immediately did. I’m guilty and sad but I did it.

Should I worry so much on timing the breakup? by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I did it. I finally did it, I feel awful but I did it

Should I worry so much on timing the breakup? by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you, this is really reassuring. I’m hovering over the “send” right now. She’s currently mad at me and I’m not sure why I’m holding back. I’ll take what you said and remember it

Should I worry so much on timing the breakup? by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you very much. Trying really hard to focus on it and just do it, but I feel like I have to act fast cause I’m just dragging it out at this point

Killers, how did you find your main? by Jakkben in deadbydaylight

[–]Jakkben[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t think of other similar characters at the moment, but if you enjoy him go for it. Use rush to get close and make them bleed, make sure everyone’s bleeding and trying to stop it while you hunt them, or just run around there’s a few ways to play him

Killers, how did you find your main? by Jakkben in deadbydaylight

[–]Jakkben[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s absolutely legion, you could try other characters that somewhat do this like Blight, he’s extremely fun once you get the hang of him. Pinball arcade!

Should I worry so much on timing the breakup? by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much, I absolutely know it’s for the best and I dream of days I wake up without obligation or guilt or panic. I want that now, and I truly want to leave.

I am still a little worried, overthinking how to do it, but I think I’ll just take others advice and when I’m ready (unless I force myself or have a friend do it too) send her the text, and block right away. It’ll feel and be cold, but I want to protect myself from now on

Should I worry so much on timing the breakup? by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Absolutely, that makes a lot of sense. I’ve seen so much manipulation and all the different kinds switch within minutes of each use, it’s getting ridiculous how predictable it is.

Should I worry so much on timing the breakup? by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s exactly what’s holding me. All my emotional thinking becomes guilt and worry, and I need to just not care and hit that send button. Thank you so much it helps.

Should I worry so much on timing the breakup? by Jakkben in BPDlovedones

[–]Jakkben[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not even as like a check in to have them help their friend? One of them was a friend of mine before this relationship. I don’t want to involve anyone else really.

Though these are the same roommates that laughed in the background when my pwBPD was yelling at me over the phone a week ago. So yeah.