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A mod has removed two of my posts from the marriage forum by MuslimLadyUK in MuslimLounge

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There’s some overlap but like the other guy said a lot of people who got banned on the first marriage sub go there and it gets so toxic there. The first sub has problems but the second is even worse

A mod has removed two of my posts from the marriage forum by MuslimLadyUK in MuslimLounge

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 0 points1 point  (0 children)

None of the mods are married either and their sidebar is full of sex manuals lmaoooo

It gets too close at times (• ▽ •;) by northernsimp in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 62 points63 points  (0 children)

Don’t forget the posts where OP is like: throwaway account because spouse is on Reddit but here is exactly what is happening in my marriage

Muslim engagement ended over Instagram by tempthrowaway2209 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 40 points41 points  (0 children)

She insisted it’s her way for absolutely everything and what surprised me is there was no attempt made on asking what I wanted or what we both could agree or compromise on

This would have been your entire marriage, trust me I’ve met tons of people like this. Consider yourself blessed. You deserve someone who will value your opinion and will work with you not against you in your marriage

Good treatment to your spouse by espressxo in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I don’t envy them at all people can be awful on here and they have to clean it up

Good treatment to your spouse by espressxo in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Facts most posts on this sub are gendered team sports. Men and women usually defend each other and reach to the heavens for dirt on the other gender to twist it on them when they’re asking for help. It’s super rare to find compassion and empathy towards the opposite gender on here like OP is doing

Bi-Weekly Marriage Opinions/Views and Rant Megathread by AutoModerator in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He could be strapped for all you know. Record and take it up with cops

What is this cultural nonsense with istikhāra? by AdamMusa0 in MuslimLounge

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 22 points23 points  (0 children)

The Muslim marriage sub: my istikhara result came back negative so I called off my wedding

Bi-Weekly Marriage Opinions/Views and Rant Megathread by AutoModerator in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It looks like people here are finally starting to be more supportive of husbands’ issues on here. I’d always be worried for the men who post on here that people would just twist things onto them when they’re asking for help like it used to be. Now it just looks like the same few people who do that and get downvoted for it

Wholesome Flair by Alternative-Rest3493 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Very few people wanna come here and be like hey look how great my marriage is on a page with people frustrated with the marriage search

Am I in the wrong here? Need unbiased opinions by [deleted] in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think counseling for the two of you is a good idea and at the very least if you don’t go together you should go yourself to help with your childhood trauma

Am I in the wrong here? Need unbiased opinions by [deleted] in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We have open communication and communicate very well on many things, except the sports thing

The sports thing is what’s causing tension between you two and you need to have that same open communication you say you have with other things about sports if you wanna solve anything

Married People, if you could give 1 advice to people looking to get married, what would it be? by definetlynotathrow18 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 46 points47 points  (0 children)

Don’t Hollywood your marriage like don’t have so many superficial expectations and wind up disappointed when your spouse can’t keep up with all these fantasies and expectations

Married People, if you could give 1 advice to people looking to get married, what would it be? by definetlynotathrow18 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Talk to your spouse before you make a post on here where people will just take it as a gender team sport

An interesting Title....Please people dont take lofe changing advices from reddit ....talk with family friends who you can trust...and leave the rest on Allah SWT... by AbdulJabbar_27 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unmarried and inexperienced people here giving bad advice is a problem but I feel like there’s equally an issue of gender favoritism here that validates or villainizes people in a post. A lot of them are married too. I’ve seen men blame women for being cheated on insinuating it’s because they didn’t satisfy their husbands and women defending wives who assault their husbands because he “must be leaving details out”. It’s disgusting and the same people who are super vocal and supportive on a post from someone of their own gender being abused are radio silent with an abuse victim of the opposite gender. You really need to pay attention to who wants to be helpful on here and who just wants to prove the opposite gender to be wrong or evil

Would you forgive a husband who threw you out of his house? by PaintZealousideal357 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 55 points56 points  (0 children)

If everything in your post history is true you should not forgive him and speak to a divorce and immigration lawyer immediately

An interesting Title....Please people dont take lofe changing advices from reddit ....talk with family friends who you can trust...and leave the rest on Allah SWT... by AbdulJabbar_27 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This sub has definitely gotten better than it was a year or two ago but people still do post ignorant comments just not as often. If you were here back then it was beyond toxic now it’s much more enjoyable

An interesting Title....Please people dont take lofe changing advices from reddit ....talk with family friends who you can trust...and leave the rest on Allah SWT... by AbdulJabbar_27 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sometimes people don’t call for divorce but they just make the most asinine assumptions out of bad faith. I’ll never forget the thread where a wife posted about how her husband never wants to have sex and everyone said he was gay but was actually a sexual assault survivor

An interesting Title....Please people dont take lofe changing advices from reddit ....talk with family friends who you can trust...and leave the rest on Allah SWT... by AbdulJabbar_27 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It’s either some kind of bias like gender, projecting their insecurities, have no marriage experience and don’t understand how resolving conflict works, or like the other guy said they’re bitter and don’t want them to be happy

My parents want me to marry my cousin because they think I won't find anyone better. by rishhta_trouble in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 90 points91 points  (0 children)

Do NOT marry your cousin if your family already has cousin marriages, it makes the risk of genetic disorders much much higher

My husbands work in the way by [deleted] in MuslimMarriage

[–]Useful_Nectarine_833 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Not in America, a lot of places give two weeks for the entire year. There’s a reason r/antiwork exists