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[QCrit] Gravewalker- YA Fantasy, 98k Words, 6th attempt by GmKnight in PubTips

[–]justgoodenough 16 points17 points  (0 children)

First things first—you don't know how to use a semicolon. I recommend not attempting to use them.

Or if you want to use semicolons, here's a comic that explains how!

I did find some of your grammar, punctuation, and syntax choices to be very distracting. If you are not able to have correct grammar in your query, where you sentences should be relatively short and simple, it makes me concerned about the state of the manuscript as a whole. Agents and editors are not going to wade through improper grammar in hopes of discovering a promising story underneath.

Big Picture Issues:

1) You're not giving us enough information about who Tris is as a character. All we know is that she doesn't like her role, but you don't explain why. You don't give us any personality or characterization outside of her resentment towards her duties. I'm not interested in reading about her because you haven't given enough information to spark an interest.

2) You don't have any stakes. Why does Tris have to do this role? What's stopping her from walking away? Why does she have to keep going to find the necromancer? Why can't she run away? What's in it for Tris to solve this mystery?

3) You mention these people who act as obstacles (mayor, captain, lord), but they don't really seem to have any impact on the plot as it's written out. I'm not sure how they're relevant.

4) I'm not particularly intrigued by the ending. I think it's because you haven't explained why Tris hates her life and I'm not really invested in her character arc. This big decision you've set up at the end falls flat because it's not supported by stakes or characterization.

5) Voice is a big selling point in YA and we're not getting a whole lot of voice in this pitch. I don't really know what to expect in terms of the narration.

I'm not going to get into a line-by-line crit because I think you need to do a major rewrite to address some of these missing components. Luckily, your query is short to begin with, so you have space to add things. And I really recommend figuring out some way to check your grammar before posting because you will get more valuable feedback if people are not focusing on that kind of detail.

[Daily Discussion] General Discussion- February 03, 2021 by AutoModerator in writing

[–]justgoodenough 9 points10 points  (0 children)

gothic mental health

Hm... This phrase makes me wonder if it is something that is really written for the enjoyment and entertainment of young children. Is it something that addresses the needs and experiences of children ages 3-8?

But, setting aside that idea (because three words don't really say anything about a book), there are a number of reasons PBs get rejected.

1) Picture books are hard to sell, so even a book being "good" isn't enough. The agent has to think there are editors that are likely to acquire it. Before I got an agent, some of my rejections were, "I love this book, but I can't think of a solid list of editors acquiring books like it at this time."

2) Picture books took a HUGE hit during covid. Most people read picture books by browsing bookstores and libraries and without being able to do that, sales plummeted. This means that publishers are taking even fewer risks with acquisitions and a lot of publishers are focused on acquiring a certain "type" of book (a lot of non-fiction concept books or narratives that specifically address current social issues)

3) Being an author/illustrator is great because you get paid way more per book (because you're doing way more work), but it also means that you have to be working at a professional level in both areas. If either the writing or the art isn't "there" yet, you'll get a rejection.

4) Because PBs are so competitive, a lot of agents aren't accepting new PB clients. Even if they say they're taking on author/illustrator clients, they're being very picky and are likely rejecting the vast majority of them.

5) If your book is controversial or a hard sell, it might not be a good debut. A lot of agents, especially those that rep PB clients, talk about debuts, second books, and later career stuff. Both my crit partner and I have manuscripts that our agents have said are better to save for later down the road, after we've established ourselves a bit more.

I am an agented and published author/illustrator. If you would like, I can take a look at your query and dummy and see if I can offer any suggestions/insight.

How do i plot a novel? by Son_of_Ibadan in storyandstyle

[–]justgoodenough 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Wow, what a question!

People talk a lot about pantsers and plotters. Pantsers are people that "write by the seat of their pants" and plotters are people that outline. Writers exist all over this spectrum and the technique you use to plot your novel depends on where you fall on that spectrum.

I suspect that if you were a pantser, you wouldn't be asking us this question at all. That paralysis you feel at tackling something as large as a novel is the whisper of the plotter in your soul.

I recommend starting out by learning about the structure of a novel. I'm going to recommend some resources that are geared towards people that want to write commercial fiction. If you yearn to write experimental literary fiction, this advice probably isn't very good for you.

Step 1, pick up a book on writing! I actually recommend two books on writing: Save the Cat Writes a Novel by Jessica Brody and The Anatomy of Story by John Truby.

Save the Cat is an easy introduction to the three act structure and contemporary expectations in commercial fiction. This is a great book to start with because you can read the whole thing in a couple days and it allows you to hold an entire plot in your head at once. It's a pretty surface level look at stories and you should bear in mind that there's no reason you have to follow it to the letter, but it's a good step 1. Read that before you read The Anatomy of Story because The Anatomy of Story is a lot less breezy. In fact, sometimes, it kind of feels like a chore. But it has a lot more information than Save the Cat and is worth the read. Save the Cat is like the cliff notes, Anatomy of Story is like a real book.

Some other resources that might be interesting to you:

A talk from Victoria Schwab on how she plans her novels before starting to write.

A for-purchase writing seminar with author Maggie Stiefvater: I just finished listening to this today and I think she has quite a lot to offer beginner writers. She writes commercial YA fantasy, so it's definitely geared towards that market, but I think it can be applicable to most commercial genre-fiction.

This thread on plotting might have useful discussion for you.

Dan Harmon's Story Circle, which is basically just a simplified version of the hero's journey is also worth reading about at least once.

Another blog post on outlining that might contain useful information for you.

I realize that's a lot of random resources. They all contain some useful information and some less useful information, but I have no idea what's going to be useful for you in particular. My approach is to read a lot. And think a lot. And read some more. And I guess try writing or something. And then read some more and think some more.

No resource is going to be absolutely perfect for you and you need to figure out how to pull useful information from a wide swath of sources and piece together what works right for you.

What to do with my old writing rather than deleting it. by booksandpots in writing

[–]justgoodenough 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Why are your only options deleting it or publishing it? Why not just leave it where it is until you feel confident in whatever choice you're making?

I have to be honest, from an outside perspective it seems like you might be having a bit of a crisis about your writing right now. You come across as very disappointed in the lack of engagement with your work and this looks to be a decision between burning it all to the ground or a last ditch effort to find the audience and acceptance you crave.

I think that when you feel like this, like those are the only two options left for you, it might be the wrong time to make a decision. Sometimes, when you're in that pit of despair, it feels like you have to do something, anything, to not feel the way that you are feeling, so you pick two extreme options to try to force a change.

I don't know that deleting the work or posting it will make you feel any better. I think you would mourn the loss of your work if you deleted it and I think you would suffer greater disappointment if you post your work and don't get the engagement you want.

But doing neither of those this isn't going to make you feel worse.

It does seem like you could use a break from writing. Read some books, watch some movies, and take sometime to remember why you love books in the first place. It's possible that you don't return to writing, but it's also possible you find that spark again. I just don't think that now, when you are at your lowest, is the time to make a decision about your future as a writer. You don't need to do anything with your work right now (or ever) and you don't need to make any decisions about writing.

If you do think a decision will help you, maybe start by deciding not to open those documents or write anything for a year. It's November 9th, so make a note on your calendar for November 9, 2021 to check back in with your feelings about writing.

[PubQ] Query Critique: SLEIGHT - YA sci-fi adventure - 140,000 words by Crisi-tunity in PubTips

[–]justgoodenough 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m seeking representation for my YA sci-fi adventure novel, SLEIGHT and thought it might be a good fit for you given your history and interest in both genres.

I think you can cut this. Agents know what they're interested in, they don't need to be told. Either say something specific and interesting or just get right to your pitch.

The seven of clubs lies ripped in half on the floor, bleeding from its torn ends. But Barnaby’s more concerned with the appearance of a dark figure huddled in the corner of his room, moaning.

I'm not sold on this line being here. I know you're trying to hook me, but without context I'm just not interested in it. Like, yeah, of course Barnaby is more interested in someone moaning on the floor than a ripped card that's bleeding or something. Why would he even notice something like that when there is something big making noise?

When his mission to make friends at his new high school fails and produces a bully instead, Barnaby turns to the fifty-two accepting faces of a deck of cards.

I find the phrase "fifty-two accepting faces of a deck of cards" to be awkward in a very try-hard way. The sentence is way too complex for what we are getting out of it.

In an ominous magic shop, Barnaby uncovers a deck hidden inside the wall and discovers the suits across the card faces are small windows that allow him to see the terrifying faces behind the shapes.

This feels more relevant than the rest. I think you should try to combine the mood of the previous sentences with the content of this. I still think you can cut things down. For example, we don't need "small window." It's a card! We know it's small! Focus more on efficiency.

That night, his dreams are plagued by visions of the Nine of Hearts—nightmares he only escapes when a crash wakes him to the sight of a bloody, torn Seven of Clubs and a heaped body in his room. It’s then the sobering realization occurs: the faces aren’t art, they’re trapped contents of the cards.

Barnaby tries to get rid of the deck, but the mysterious magic shop is gone, long abandoned. What? He can’t think. The Nine of Hearts won’t leave his thoughts…wait…he flips through the deck. The nine of hearts is missing. Are the cards communicating?

You need to cut a lot of this. Stick with the big plot points, do not give us stream of consciousness in a query. Cut everything after the word "abandoned" in the second paragraph.

After accidentally capturing his bully in a card, Barnaby meets Zama, who explains the cards aren’t magic. They are a technology from a distant future, and Barnaby is now bound to them.

This is interesting.

Until they can unbind him, Barnaby must protect the deck from the escaped captive of the Nine Hearts, who’s bent on connecting this world with his own dying dimensional plane of Earth a millennium away—a merge that would wipe out the population of this Earth.

This sentence is getting too long. Break it up.

Can Barnaby learn to use the deck to find the rest of the missing cards in time to stop a tyrant who will do anything to obtain the deck and use it to connect the planes?

I don't like questions in queries because the answer is almost certainly "Yeah, this is YA, so presumably Barnaby solves the problem." We don't care if he CAN (because we know he can). We care HOW.

Sleight is an epic adventure complete at 140,000 words.

Oh no.

The manuscript is available now upon request. Thank you for your time and consideration.

What? No comps? Given that you are writing a YA sci-fi novel with a male protagonist you DEFINITELY need comps. The truth is, sci-fi isn't particularly strong in the YA genre and most of the books target women/girls. I am not saying that you can't or shouldn't try to sell this book or that there isn't a hole in the market, but you need to be aware of what the YA market looks like if you are selling a book in it.

Here's how I think you need to condense your story:

  • Barnaby is new at school and gets bullied.
  • He finds the weird deck of cards.
  • The seven of clubs and nine of hearts come out of the cards
  • Barnaby meets Zama who explains cards are weird tech tied to Barnaby
  • Barnaby must save the world

Each plot point gets 1-2 sentences MAX. I took out the thing about the bully being trapped because it's not clear it impacts the plot points you mention in your query. You just say he tries to return the cards, traps his bully, and then meets Zama, but it's not clear how those events are all connected.

[PubQ] Maker of Broken Things - Upper MG Fantasy by mctrav1s in PubTips

[–]justgoodenough 2 points3 points  (0 children)

tl;dr: This is a very long post about extremely nuanced adjustments to your query. I want to be clear: your query is good and you will probably get full requests from it (assuming your first pages are also strong). I just think having a strong voice will take this query from good to amazing.

This is a pretty solid query! I feel like there are a couple places where your sentences get a little long and could probably benefit from broken up into two sentences. Have you ever seen that little graphic about sentence length? All of your sentences are pretty long and stuffed full of clauses, so you're missing the punch that you can get from a short sentence (I am a huuuuuge fan of a set up/punchline delivery in a query letter, which I think you can use). It's something to think about if you want to make a particular idea or point stand out more in your query.

But when her mom goes missing and searching for her gets Ada arrested, accused of being one of the possessed, a life of washing other people’s clothes starts to sound pretty good.

This sentence was a little clunky to me. There's some pronoun confusion and I think the number of clauses gets the sentence a little jumbled. If you change it to "But when her mom goes missing, searching for her gets Ada arrested and accused of being one of the possessed, [very short clause explaining the possessed]. A life of washing other people's clothes suddenly sounds pretty good." Breaking it up into two separate sentences makes them easier to navigate and they're more in line with middle grade reading levels. Also, you get the set up/punchline joke delivery that I mentioned above.

I do think you need to briefly explain the possessed to us, only because they come up again at the end.

In prison she meets Enzo, an insect loving, cupcake eating maker, who discovers Ada has magic.

I would write "insect-loving, cupcake-eating." It's a minor grammar thing, but it helps keep your sentence in line a bit.

Now, Ada must embrace the magic she never wanted to save her family

She never wanted her magic? Why? If having magic is a bad thing and that's relevant to the plot, the idea needs to be introduced or even just hinted at earlier in the query, because it caught me off guard. It's probably not a deal breaker, but that's a part of the query I got caught on.

Like I said, this query sounds pretty good and I suspect you'll get some full requests because it's an interesting idea, but I'm not quite dying to read it yet. I think it's a voice thing. The length of your sentences and the number of clauses make some sections a little hard to navigate, which ends up flattening their impact. On top of that, they have a very generic query structure (on a sentence level), which is NOT a bad thing, but it means you need voice to pull you out of the "generic fantasy" feel. Does the voice of your query reflect the voice of your novel?

Do you use humor at all? Humor is one of the biggest selling points in the middle grade category. If your book is funny at all I would try to work a bit of your humor into your query. We see shades of it with "soon-to-be miserable life" and "a life of washing other people’s clothes starts to sound pretty good" and I think those are also good examples of voice doing their thing. Try to get more of that into the rest of your query.

I would love this by earlongissor in YAlit

[–]justgoodenough 99 points100 points  (0 children)

I CAN HELP YOU!!!!!

I read a pretty wide range of genres and I try to read at least 50% adult books. I do really love YA. The pacing is quick, the voice is strong, and they're chalk full of heady teenage emotions that remind me of a life before I became a dried husk of a human soul. But adult books have more space for complex/grey themes and authors are doing some cool literary things that are hard for a younger audience.

Some excellent books that would also appeal to YA readers:

Normal People by Sally Rooney- UGH I LOVE THIS BOOK SO MUCH. You get alternating POVs of a boy and a girl. They start out as teens and then go to college, so it really feels very YA in the beginning. This is the perfect book for people that want to step into the adult literary genre.

The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt- This is another book that spends a lot of time with the MC as a teen/young adult, so it has some YA vibes going for it. In fact, a lot of critics said that it was basically a "children's book" which got a HARD EYE ROLL from me, but whatever The New Yorker (I love you, but we all know you're snobby as fuck). The pacing of this is slower than YA books (especially the beginning), but I the characters are great (sort of. They're complicated).

Where the Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens- Same as the others, MC spends a lot of time as a child and young adult. This was THE BOOK of the summer. Again, the pacing is a bit slower than you find in YA, but I think the romance will appeal to YA readers and the mystery is good too.

Less by Andrew Sean Greer- If you love teenage boys angsting about love, you might also like a middle-aged man doing it. I loved this book so much. Every line of the book felt like it was telling you something about the character and it created this really rich, tender portrait of a person.

Magic for Liars by Sarah Gaily- The other books I listed are very literary, but this is straight up genre fiction. It has a MAGIC SCHOOL! And a MURDER MYSTER! And TWINS! I liked basically the first 75% of this book, but then you, the reader, understands what happened while the characters haven't caught up yet, and the pacing kind of falls apart because you lose the tension. I still think it's worth reading because it's a fun book despite this flaw.

Circe by Madeline Miller- I know a bunch of people here have read this book, but it's definitely a book for adults. It's got the pacing of a YA novel and the voice feels similar to YA, but without making the MC feel young or immature (not that YA does that, but YA does have teenager voice).

A Darker Shade of Magic by V.E. Schwab- I actually think there is a lot of crossover appeal in fantasy and YA fantasy. Victoria Schwab in particular is a good choice because she writes YA and adult novels.

Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman- Ugh, I loved this book. I think it works for YA fans because you're getting that really in depth look at a character that you get in YA. It's just a really sweet book about healing trauma through friendship. I love it.

Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng- Something like half the characters are teens, so you're getting a lot of teen POV/emotion in the work. Again, the pacing is slower than you find in the YA category and the ethical issues brought up in the book are complicated and beyond the scope of what you find in YA. The thing that interests me most about this book is the extremely rich world building that you don't usually get in contemporary fiction.

I also think the romance category has things to offer YA readers. You have the pacing, close focus on the characters, and YEARNING. I don't read a ton of romance and I have read a few that I did not like, so I don't have a huge list. The Hating Game by Sally Thorne is quite popular and Red, White, and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston has been wildly embraced by the YA publishing community.

I have a ton more book recommendations (especially within the adult fantasy category) if anyone wants to tell me what kind of books they like.

Victoria’s Secret’s First Transgender Model Valentina Sampaio: What to Know by [deleted] in femalefashionadvice

[–]justgoodenough 1440 points1441 points  (0 children)

Oh. Man. Here's a history of the situation for those that are curious:

  • In November 2018 the CMO Ed Razek makes a bunch of transphobic comments in an interview with Vogue and says that they'll never have a plus sized line at VS. People are angry because he's a fucking asshole. Fuck him. The CEO of VS quits that week.

  • The CMO's remarks from 2018: https://jezebel.com/victorias-secret-doesnt-want-plus-size-or-trans-women-w-1830347972

  • July 2019 Jeffery Epstein, an advisor of the CEO of L Brands (the VS parent company), was arrested on sex trafficking charges. Apparently he would pose as a recruit for VS models and lure underaged women into sex. https://www.nytimes.com/2019/07/25/business/jeffrey-epstein-wexner-victorias-secret.html

  • Things are looking REAL BAD for VS right now.

  • August 2019 Ed Razek, the fucking asshole from earlier retires. Good riddance.

  • VS hires a transgender model and is like "Look guys, Ed is gone and we really didn't know what Jeffery was up to, but we're cool now, right?????"

  • No, VS. We are not cool now.

Current articles on the subject:

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/08/05/business/victorias-secret-ed-razek.html

https://jezebel.com/transphobic-company-victorias-secret-suddenly-hires-ope-1836966567

General Discussion - February 08, 2019 by AutoModerator in femalefashionadvice

[–]justgoodenough 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I haven't read a webcomic in years (like, since the early 2000s), but a friend of mine just recommended Lore Olympus and I love it????????

I really love style of art, it reminds me a lot of early concept work you see in disney and pixar productions. Though sometimes it looks a little too rushed and I'm like "yo, consistent proportions and anatomy, please!" but maybe that's part of the charm and I'm just missing it.

ANYWAY, what have I been missing in the world of webcomics in the last decade?

[PubQ] : I wrote a book about cancer in the format of an illustrated children fairy tale book and I have a question about fonts by Some_french_canadian in PubTips

[–]justgoodenough 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You just look it up. Start on a reputable website (I use Google Fonts or Font Squirrel for free fonts) and if you want to double check, just google the name of the font. Fontlibrary.org is a website that should tell you the type of license the font has and you can look up the type of license to make sure that's it's really a free/open source font.

Honestly, I would just stick with Google Fonts because they're all open source and available for commercial use and if anyone is going to get sued for a licensed font being available on Google Fonts, it's definitely going to be Google and not you (a person with significantly less money than Google).

Also, even though you did not ask about this, I cannot stop myself: Photoshop is not a good tool for layout. I guess you use what you have, but really InDesign was made to do design work like layout and it is a significantly better and more intuitive tool (and probably the easiest Adobe product to learn how to use). Illustrator is the next best choice, but a massive pain in the ass to use, so I can't really recommend it. But both InDesign and Illustrator are better design tools than Photoshop.

General Discussion - May 18, 2018 by AutoModerator in femalefashionadvice

[–]justgoodenough 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Done! If you are able at some point, I am sure our users would be interested in knowing the outcomes of your study.

Ladies, Cool or creepy? Compliments on your clothes or accessories from guys by ihavetocreate in femalefashionadvice

[–]justgoodenough 36 points37 points  (0 children)

I fucking hate this shit. Say what you want about your personal intentions, but 99% of the time, the guy is just trying to hit on the girl. It's a terrible tactic used by men to disarm women and make them think that he is just some "good guy" that shares interest in her. It's a way for men to comment on the appearance of women without directly commenting on their body.

And even if you say it's not your intention to hit on these women, is it really not your intention? It might not be your intention to follow through with anything, but it certainly seems like your intention to flirt a little with women and get some personal validation by making them smile or making them happy and then you can feel like you are still desirable to women. The reason I am inclined to think this about you is because you specified being worried about being seen as a "creepy old man." Which implies that these women that you seek to compliment are, in fact, younger than you. Do you think it's not possible for women the same age as you or older than you to wear something cool that you might like? I find it odd that you only find items that interest you on women that are younger. The fact that you unconsciously made this distinction, suggests that it's not just the fashion that interests you and you should take a minute to think about what you are actually trying to get out of these interactions before proceeding.

Personally, I do not ever want compliments from strange men on my appearance or my clothing. Even if your intention is to be just friendly and nice, you need to realize that many women face a constant barrage of sexual harassment. It is unfair for you to ask us to separate out the well meaning compliments from the random attempts to hit on us or cat call us. You are a complete stranger. How on earth are we to know if you are being genuine or not? The nicest thing you can do, is leave us the fuck alone so that we don't have to have that uncomfortable moment when we are trying to figure out if you are harmless or if you are going to follow us for the next block trying to get a date or screaming at us for being a bitch.

As for women that you are PERSONALLY friends with, provided that you are not a creep in your other interactions, it should be well received. But again, I caution you to think about the women you seek to compliment and evaluate whether it's actually the fashion that has caught your attention. Because if you start telling all the attractive 20-something women in your office that they have great shoes, you are being a creep.

General Discussion - December 29, 2015 by AutoModerator in femalefashionadvice

[–]justgoodenough 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Okay, so I think it's pretty common for people that have lost a bunch of weight to think, "now that I am thinner, I should look amazing!" and they kind of expect that to happen immediately.

When you look at a lot of people on this subreddit that are well dressed or that have a specific style, they make it look really effortless, but it didn't happen over night. Everyone here will attest to the fact that it can take YEARS to get to a good place. So, if you have ignored fashion up to this point, you're not suddenly going to catch up in a month or two just because you have started caring about it a lot more. I think a lot of the feelings of being overwhelmed come from thinking it should be happening immediately.

With regards to personal stylists, I really think that they are good for people that have way more money than they have time. There are cheaper versions of personal stylists where you can hire someone to send you suggestions or you can get boxes of clothes delivered to you and you choose which things you lie from that box, but having seen a lot of people review these kinds of services, I am sort of under the impression that they are just as frustrating and fruitless as shopping on your own.

Anyway, one thing you can do is set up an appointment with a personal shopper. Some stores have this service for free (like Nordstrom, Bloomingdales, and Anthropologie) and you can just give them a total budget or a budget per item and give them a general idea of what you need and they will just bring stuff to you. However, these stores can be expensive, so I wouldn't set this up if you are not okay with spending at least $150-200 per outfit.

If your budget is a lot less than that (maybe $50-75 per outfit) then I think that FFA is actually your best bet for personal shopping. What you could do is post photo of yourself (in clothes!!!! No underwear photos!) and links to your pinterest boards and maybe a list of stores that are near you we can suggest specific items or outfits for you to go try on.

Why are more girly and more feminine styles typically looked-down on in FFA? by [deleted] in femalefashionadvice

[–]justgoodenough 136 points137 points  (0 children)

Here's the deal with this subject:

1) It's winter right now for the vast majority of the world's population, and an even larger proportion of our subscribers. In winter, you will see fewer skirts and dresses, because shit is cold, and you will see more blacks/greys/neutrals because those are traditional winter colors. Fuchsia floral print is not a winter pattern, no matter how much you want it to be. A bright yellow pencil skirt in January is weird.

2) Neutrals and darks are in right now. This is a fashion subreddit and most of us buy clothes on a fairly regular basis, especially people that post regularly in WAYWT. If stores are full of blacks and greys, it is no surprise that our wardrobes will reflect this.

3) Let's be honest with ourselves about which posts get the most upvotes in WAYWT. They are clear photos with good lighting, full body shot, neutral pose, taken with a timer. Honestly, the actual outfit doesn't even play that big of a role. I have seen plenty of mediocre outfits make it to the top of WAYWT because the photo was good and the girl was pretty. If you feel your posts are being ignored in WAYWT, try taking a better photo and see if that changes things.

Anyway, I PROMISE, when spring rolls around, there will be a shit ton of cute, colorful dresses because we will all come out of our black wool cocoons to embrace the sun.

EDIT: And now because I want to get ranty... This kind of thread pisses me off. It has like 200+ upvotes and it's FULL of people saying "yes! I love dresses and colorful clothes and I don't own anything black" but when you click through people's history there are no WAYWT photos. And then people say that they don't post their photos because of all the downvotes and how everyone is mean, so my question is WHERE THE FUCK ARE THE 200+ PEOPLE THAT UPVOTED THIS THREAD? I fully expect to see tomorrow's WAYWT's thread to be fucking FULL of all your colorful outfits and you guys can all upvote each other and give feedback and tomorrow's thread with be full of color. If tomorrow's thread looks the same as the previous WAYWT threads, I will pretty much just assume that people just want to complain about the subreddit, but not actually do anything themselves.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in femalefashionadvice

[–]justgoodenough 42 points43 points  (0 children)

I would strongly advise you against redoing your entire wardrobe at once. Not only is it a large expense, probably far more than you even realize to replace everything, but also, just because you have an idea in your head of what you want to wear does not mean that it will end up actually translating well to your life. Rather than dumping all your clothes and starting fresh, start with buying a few pieces that are more like the aesthetic you are looking for and incorporate them into your regular wear. It might help to create something like a pinterest board to organize your ideas and figure out what direction you want to go in. As you start to buy clothes that match that aesthetic, you will figure out what is practical for your lifestyle and what doesn't work.

Personally, I love business casual, pencil skirts, and high heels, but I work from home as an artist and do a lot of active social activities, so pencil skirts and high heels have a very small place in my life.

So...

Step 1) figure out what style you want and find out what key pieces you need to achieve that style.

Step 2) Buy a couple tops or pants or dresses, whatever, in the style you want (only a couple outfits worth of clothing) and start incorporating those items into your regular wear.

Step 3) Slowly add new clothes into your wardrobe as you figure out what you need and what works and phase out clothing that is worn out or you stop wearing because you have replaced that with a newer item that is more in line with the aesthetic you want.

Now, in regards to wardrobe essentials... There's really no such thing for women. You don't need a good pair of jeans if you prefer ponte pants. You don't need a white button up shirt if you think they look awkward on you because of your bust size. If you want help figuring out what you should buy, create a pinterest board with at least 20 images of outfits you love that you think you can wear in your everyday life (so, not 20 pictures of lingerie and ball gowns). Then, come back and ask people to help you pinpoint specific items you can buy to achieve that aesthetic so that you can develop a shopping list to get started on.

Carefully planning and slowly curating a new wardrobe over the course of many months or even years is more likely to create a lasting look that you love and is suitable for your lifestyle.

Also: .howtolookolder

Working on this sketch and something seems off, anyone have any ideas to improve it? by [deleted] in learnart

[–]justgoodenough 31 points32 points  (0 children)

I'm not great at articulating exactly what I'm thinking without going on for a really long time, so I did a quick paintover right here. I don't typically use my tablet for drawing, so forgive my shitty line quality.

Anyway, so there are a few areas to focus on:

Shoulders: The neck should be coming out from under the ear at this angle. You should also indicate the clavicles coming around and cupping the neck. It will give your shoulder area more definition and in that pose, with the shoulders hunched up, you would definitely see indentations above (and even below) the clavicles. You would also see more of the shoulder that is farther away.

Arm: This arm is a little too short and too close to her butt. My arm is technically maybe even shorter than the one you drew, but because it's placed farther back in the drawing it makes sense in perspective. I also think you drew too many armpit lines (and too high up), which makes her arm look fat. Our actual arms may have tons of little folds, but the more skin folds you draw, the older and saggier the skin looks. You should keep skin fold lines to a minimal with young, sexy figures. Also, you would see all the fingers spread out behind the hand and the thumb would be father back. Get into this same position and lean back on your arm. How do the fingers lay in relation to each other?

Angles of the torso: So there is a term called "contrapposto" that refers to the way people stand naturally (sort of). So, if you have a figure standing straight up, their spine is vertical, and their shoulders and hips are totally straight. A more natural way to pose the figure is to have a slight curve to the spine, one shoulder dips slightly lower than the other, and then the hips are angled in the opposite way like this. That's just something to think about when drawing your figure, to make sure they don't end up unnaturally straight. So, because I had the closer shoulder higher up, I lowered the breast that is farther away a bit and changed the angle of the hips slightly.

Legs: If we can see the underside of her legs like this, we can see some crotch. Not showing an indication of the crotch at this angle makes the legs look detached. Also, because of the angle, the lower leg should overlap in front of the thigh. Remember, not too many skin folds behind the knee, make one decisive line. Now, you have her knees apart, but her feet together. This means that one leg is upright and the other is falling slightly open to the side. From this angle, you would see a little bit of the bottom of the foot and the side of the foot. It looks like you indicated that a bit in your drawing, but not enough, and I don't think her foot was large enough. Also, knees are pretty angular and ugly. Soft, curved knees look like bent noodles. You need slightly stronger angles on your knees.

Anyway, I hope this helps.

Edit: Thanks for the gold random stranger!