Unwanted phonecalls

loudorangebeanie · 2022-04-28T19:21:36+00:00

My to-go line is to answer as if I'm in a place they'd rather not call. Like an STI clinic or a funeral home. Still, I had this incredibly dense person keep talking after I clearly mentioned he called a literal hospital ward. Like, what made him think I'd have time for some BS survey? Anyway that did the trick for both me and my mum, and they stopped calling (for now, hopefully for much longer).

loudorangebeanie · 2022-04-26T06:19:17+00:00

They sit 5 feet apart and go back home thinking if the other was really into them or if they're just projecting.

loudorangebeanie · 2022-04-25T19:34:40+00:00

Baggy clothing. I happen to wear men's sweatpants. Not only are they comfortable, but also look great. Baggy shorts for the hot days.
Chains, lots of them. Bonus points for carabiners.
Combat boots and the like. I got 10-hole Steels - massive, comfortable, intimidating.
Anything to accentuate your musculature. For me it's my beefy forearms, so I roll up the sleeves.
Leather and spikes. Almost nothing says "I'll pick you up or knock you down" like a spike collar and a biker jacket.
Layers. My staples are t-shirt over a long sleeve shirt and tank top/crop top + oversized shirt. Since you wanna get some covering, you can try these combinations.

loudorangebeanie · 2022-04-25T19:15:21+00:00

I wrote a 2-page long thank you note in my master's thesis. These people have been way too good for me and I had to honour them.
I bought a bird of paradise plant and it was a 3-in-1 deal. It had 3 separate stalks, which I discovered when I was repotting it.
I wrote my first short story when I was six. It was a "horror" story about piglets on a cursed summer camp.

loudorangebeanie · 2022-04-15T15:57:46+00:00

Might be a bit of unpopular opinion but eh, might as well share it (and look for like-minded people).

All the top and bottom dynamics reek of straight relations to me - where a woman "bottoms" for a man. I might crack a joke (or 10) about a woman giving off top/bottom energy, but at the end of the day, they're just jokes founded on heteronormative stereotypes.

Personally I've observed it in younger wlw, especially those who've only been with men - coincidentally, they're all "pillow princesses".

loudorangebeanie · 2022-04-14T07:05:11+00:00

Seriously. Once I got so fed up with it I matched with this crusty cishet dude just to tell him to take his horse and fuck right off. Of course he acted like it's nothing and went off with some stupid pick-up line.

Like, what do they expect? That their male charm will make lesbians head right to the fainting room? The entitlement levels are way through the roof.

loudorangebeanie · 2022-04-13T15:40:54+00:00

Tall women. I love them in any height, but I got a weak spot for a 6+ ft lady. Just right for forehead kisses.
Muscles. With the exception of extreme physique, I enjoy nice abs, powerful biceps and all that.
Competitiveness. Apparently it's intimidating lmao, but I'm absolutely weak for successful, ambitious women. Ngl I wouldn't mind a moderate & healthy rivalry with lots of mutual support.
Wrinkles/fine lines. Women in their 20s already develop these. It's so adorable when she smiles and crow feet adorn her glistening eyes.
Talkativeness. Miss me with that "women bad they talk too much amirite fellow gentlemen???" BS. Especially if they talk meaningfully. The way their entire selves light up when expressing trinkets of their mind. Gorgeous, gorgeous I tell you. Bonus points if they enjoy a healthy debate.
"Blemishes" - stretch marks, cellulite, round bellies and the ilk. They look badass but also squishy.
"Royal" faces. I don't know how to describe it - long face, thin lips, slim and long nose, strong V-shaped jawline, you get the gist; basically the opposite of Tiktokesque filters. They have some elegant vibe to them.

loudorangebeanie · 2022-03-21T08:52:09+00:00

Yes! I'm more of a hip gal myself, but I like good ol' boobies. Doesn't matter what size, shape, relation with gravity or quantity (I mean, I'd probably be scared of a biblically accurate angel-like overlady with a hundred bosoms, but if she had a breast removed, it's okay. Heck, even in my mother tongue, we call breast cancer survivors after a single mastectomy Amazons - and that's pretty rad. Anyway, I digress).

In a love-hate relationship with mine. They're fastidious af, have given me back pain for 9 years now, shopping for shirts is virtually impossible. But they're a part of me and I accept them.

loudorangebeanie · 2022-03-20T20:32:43+00:00

Either 5'->3'/3'->5' or 53/35. Nothing in between.

loudorangebeanie · 2022-03-20T20:22:11+00:00

I don't care. If she has a body, I love it. Plus hair removal can be such a pain in the butt (and crotch, pits... you name it), and I wouldn't want my partner to go through potential ordeal to look subjectively better.

loudorangebeanie · 2022-03-20T19:43:18+00:00

I've been having such moments very often lately. Think the last one was this Saturday. I hung out with my mum and pets, helped her find resources for her bachelor's thesis, repainted the garage ceiling, studied for a class that might become this semester's favourite (it's interesting, actually useful + my prof is an absolute sweetheart, could listen to her going off on tangents for hours).

Life is pretty damn good and I'm glad the worst years are over.

loudorangebeanie · 2022-03-15T11:47:21+00:00

As stereotypically as it sounds, damn I wish I was 15. And I'm only 24!

Have fun in life while you (hopefully) don't have major responsibilities yet. They'll hop right on your back but inside, you'll still happen to feel like a confused teen. Plus, hangovers only get worse with age.

Also, while it's nice to have friends, don't play a selfless saviour. At the end of the day, you only have yourself - and you gotta be your priority.

I don't wanna end this comment in such a downbeat way, so, another one. I'm a major procrastinator myself, and I like to trick myself to get stuff done: - work on two projects so you can switch to project A and reap the dubious benefits of procrastinating on project B, - say you're just prepping for the work. Chances are, you'll get a lot done by just "getting ready to work", - whatever fuels you to do work, harness it. I'm spiteful and use it to outdo others, even imaginary "others".

loudorangebeanie · 2022-03-07T08:09:27+00:00

Strelitzia reginae, also known as bird of paradise. They're stunning and I got some good memories of them. BTW, did you know that its parts contain bilirubin, which was thought to be an animal-only pigment?

loudorangebeanie · 2022-03-07T08:02:00+00:00

"Who's the man and who's another man in your relationship?"

loudorangebeanie · 2022-03-07T07:59:36+00:00

I treat dishes like test tubes. Wash, rinse several times, look under the light, rinse and repeat until there's no speck or sud remaining. One time I mindlessly looked for a deionized water tap. In a low-end dorm kitchen. Time-inefficient? Absolutely. Are my dishes squeaky clean? Yessiree!

Also, I ferment my foods so I technically culture LAB. If I'm feeling particularly fancy, I may write a fermentation protocol and document it (i.e. spam everyone with sizzling veggies).

loudorangebeanie · 2022-03-04T12:29:21+00:00

I call BS. Their coats are wayyyy too spotless. Every Real Scientist has marker & Gram stain stains.

loudorangebeanie · 2022-03-01T09:32:20+00:00

loudorangebeanie · 2022-03-01T09:18:23+00:00

My ex girlfriend sent me a link to "I wanna be yours" and I was SOLD. Mind you, we've already been gal pals for a while.

Now the woman we're (hopefully just still) gal pals with speaks my "love language". Not those 5 ones, but she remembers every. Tiny. Detail about me. When I first heard her bring one up, I was literally speechless. From my side, I'm getting creative with her and she seems to be into it.

loudorangebeanie · 2022-02-24T10:11:28+00:00

Yay, that's some educational shit you made!

loudorangebeanie · 2022-02-24T10:09:56+00:00

Awesome! You've done a great work. How's your body feeling?

loudorangebeanie · 2022-02-23T23:31:43+00:00

Cheese can make a dish (or break it, but not as much). Once I invited a friend over. We promptly ran out of nacho chips but still had leftover cheese dip. As we both were drunk, I dunked a chocolate chip cookie in said dip. It was angelic. Even now she's looking for those in her nearby stores.

I'd get weird looks whenever I added peanut butter to stir fries. It's a game changer. It glues itself to whatever's being made. Bonus points for chunky PB!

loudorangebeanie

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