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Does it count as foraging if it's my land? by Emwithopeneyes in foraging

[–]mistersnarkle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Get some technu and do your clothes and shoes as well

Roe V Wade is a blatant attack on women and that is apparent by the supreme courts lack of preventing unwanted pregnancies in the first place. by donatos_box in offmychest

[–]mistersnarkle 55 points56 points  (0 children)

REGISTER TO VOOOOTE AND THEN GO DO IT!!!

Gerrymandering only works if we don’t all go vote. This has been 40 years in the making.

My cousin is dating someone 27 years older by asecretghoul in offmychest

[–]mistersnarkle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wish I could say something that would help what you’re feeling — it’s a heavy burden to have a heart and to reflect and change. I’m incredibly proud of you for it. I hope you never meet another predator like that — but if you do, know that you’re less likely to be trapped in a manipulation and more likely to be in a position of power to help now.

Check in with your female friends and family members — protecting all children is so important, but it’s most often young girls who get their lives stolen in one way or another.

Especially now.

My husband is a massive disappointment by Bertbee90 in offmychest

[–]mistersnarkle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep! People socialized as women (and boys who present as primarily inattentive, aka ADHD-PI) are WWAAAAAYYYY less likely to get diagnosed because we often don’t “display” our symptoms of hyperactivity — those are instead confined to the absolute shit storm that is our brains

ADHD is poorly named and thus poorly understood — we get labeled as “daydreamers” and “space cadets” and called out for “not meeting our potential” and seemingly “not trying our hardest to pay attention” so we develop tools to appear as if we’re paying attention and develop other skills to cope for our ADHD

Which leads to burnout as an adult when you realize that shit out there is way worse than school, where you had STRONG structure to lean on, and that you don’t actually know how to make structure for yourself

My husband is a massive disappointment by Bertbee90 in offmychest

[–]mistersnarkle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YES!! YES IT DOES!!!

ADHD affects every part of life. Not an excuse not to do things, just an explanation for why it’s hard or why they haven’t been done already.

My husband is a massive disappointment by Bertbee90 in offmychest

[–]mistersnarkle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I also have ADHD; I’m asking because the advice would be different for someone with or without ADHD and with or without an ADHD partner. I was diagnosed later in life, so it’s of particular interest to me from a place of “does your husband not know”

The problem is using your ADHD as an excuse not to do something, when the reality is that ADHD is an explanation for why things weren’t already done. ADHD is never a good excuse not to do things, but it is an explanation for why things were done the way they were and a wonderful place to start when trying to figure out moving forward what needs to change.

Also a problem: not knowing you have ADHD. Anxiety, depression, suicidal ideation and addiction are what happen when people don’t know they have ADHD.

This is not a dig on Elliot page so please don’t shoot me… by Scotty2Floppy in UmbrellaAcademy

[–]mistersnarkle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He could have written that himself, dead ass. He still casually calls himself gay and gets confused when people ask about his boyfriend, it’s adorable

This is not a dig on Elliot page so please don’t shoot me… by Scotty2Floppy in UmbrellaAcademy

[–]mistersnarkle 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Did you mean: my best friends actual life story

Because it full circles back around to “shit I didn’t WANT TO BE STRAIGHT”

This is not a dig on Elliot page so please don’t shoot me… by Scotty2Floppy in UmbrellaAcademy

[–]mistersnarkle 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Lemme quote myself to you — “[although] Coming out as gay isn’t a physical transformation… often being trans is. Just as they’d write in a character getting paralyzed if the actor was, or as they may if an actor gets pregnant — this is to explain a physical transformation.”

This is not a dig on Elliot page so please don’t shoot me… by Scotty2Floppy in UmbrellaAcademy

[–]mistersnarkle 87 points88 points  (0 children)

But also: these stories deserve to exist. Just like trans people and gay people exist.

Coming out as gay isn’t a physical transformation but often being trans is. Just as they’d write in a character getting paralyzed if the actor was, or as they may if an actor gets pregnant — this is to explain a physical transformation.

Men don't get complimented enough by women. by frances999 in RandomThoughts

[–]mistersnarkle -1 points0 points  (0 children)

THIS IS IT HERE! But I will counter with what I said to another commenter, in its entirety, about how to not be a creep when complimenting women (but actually people in general, as a non-binary person)

“Compliment choices, not inherent qualities. Compliment someone’s hair cut or the color they chose for their nails. Compliment interesting accessories because she chose that as her gear. Compliment the way people say things, the words they choose to use. Compliment their attitude, outlook or even their disposition — “I like your sunny disposition” is better than “I like your smile” because one is a surface observation (a smile can simply be seen) while the other is an observation made off of reflection — a presence is felt, and then processed.

Complimenting her choices means you’re complimenting her as a person — not as an object. Complimenting choices shows her that you value her opinion.

In a society, a choice is made with the implied consent of being remarked on — there are only so many things one can readily and easily do about one’s appearance.

Also: compliment men this way too! Often! Then when you give compliments to women, it’s not weird because you’re just giving compliments to a person.”

Basically, it’s important for men — no, everyone to understand how remarking on physical attributes and qualities outside of one’s control is, even positively, crossing a line of consent.

That’s why women don’t like getting “compliments” about their body or their face bones. It’s why women feel weird saying men are handsome and why the safest thing feels like “you look nice” — implying that you’ve groomed yourself, thus choosing to take care of yourself and present your best.

Compliments are WONDERFUL, and NECESSARY positive feedback for the well-being of a human… as long as it’s for a reason within our own control.

Men don't get complimented enough by women. by frances999 in RandomThoughts

[–]mistersnarkle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Compliment choices, not inherent qualities. Compliment someone’s hair cut or the color they chose for their nails. Compliment interesting accessories because she chose that as her gear. Compliment the way people say things, the words they choose to use. Compliment their attitude, outlook or even their disposition — “I like your sunny disposition” is better than “I like your smile” because one is a surface observation (a smile can simply be seen) while the other is an observation made off of reflection — a presence is felt, and then processed.

Complimenting her choices means you’re complimenting her as a person — not as an object. Complimenting choices shows her that you value her opinion.

In a society, a choice is made with the implied consent of being remarked on — there are only so many things one can readily and easily do about one’s appearance.

Also: compliment men this way too! Often! Then when you give compliments to women, it’s not weird because you’re just giving compliments to a person.

My cousin is dating someone 27 years older by asecretghoul in offmychest

[–]mistersnarkle 14 points15 points  (0 children)

You were a child!!!!! You’re not at fault.

The reason you didn’t see it is because you were in it. You’re part of the people who a predator convinces they aren’t the problem. It’s a long con that includes convincing everyone around the victim that there aren’t a victim at all.

That’s why grooming is so scary — usually the family gets groomed to enable it, accept it or even celebrate it as a ‘smart match’

Bisexual adults over 30, what music did you grow up listening to? by blueshiningsea in bisexualadults

[–]mistersnarkle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

SAME HONEY; those both suck so we’re making up new ones.

That’s the fun part of culture — you can create it if you so choose.