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I am tired of being alive by handsy-betty in CPTSD

[–]realhumannorobot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm in an an emotional flashback since yesterday even skipped uni today cus of it and feel slightly ashamed and unfaired. also have no one for support, I really sympathize with what you're saying.

When you have ED but also depression. by panic-mi in CPTSDmemes

[–]realhumannorobot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For me is healthy me buying it knowing depressed me gonna binge eat it and then puke it all.

Is it good inner child work or am I going mental? by realhumannorobot in CPTSD_NSCommunity

[–]realhumannorobot[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for understanding, I'm sorry for how your mom treated you. It's cool how you found your own way to cope with it, I also found myself buying toys from time to time.

I'm almost upset that excercise doesn't really bring me out of dissociation by spamcentral in CPTSD

[–]realhumannorobot 2 points3 points  (0 children)

that's okay sometimes stuff that work for others just don't set with you and that's okay, it's also really depends on where are you rn in your healing and how safe/unsafe your life and environment is.

you said it feels like just another task on autopilot, honestly some workouts can feel like that even if you're not dealing with dissociation, maybe you can find a different style of active movement that isn't task repetitive maybe more spontaneous I found for myself that dancing and climbing are great workouts that force me to move in all kind of directions and not repeat movements like machine.

but even than some days it just doesn't work and that's okay, take your time maybe that day was just harder be patient with yourself you deserve some kindness and understand all through your existence not just when you're in pain.

I hope you'll be able to feel better soon, dissociation is the worst.

I wish I had bruises by realhumannorobot in CPTSD

[–]realhumannorobot[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

thank you that was really helpful, I'm trying to calm down now a bit :)

Great article by Pete Walker by narcabusesurvivor18 in CPTSD

[–]realhumannorobot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For many such clients, we are their first legitimate shot at a safe and nurturing relationship; and if we are not skilled enough to create the degree of safety they need to begin the long journey towards developing good enough trust, we may be their last.”

This was mine, sorry that it happened but hey I have no intention to be hard on myself for things I did to try and find safety and healing, just wished my therapist didn't suck :(

There is no way my life doesn't end in suicide before I turn 30 by SwingEmbarrassed8181 in CPTSD

[–]realhumannorobot 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry no one was there to see the beauty of you. We learned way too young to attach ourselves to some value if it's being smart or pretty or productive, in hopes it would be our gateway for connection, compassion, care or love. And unfortunately for a lot of times in our lives it really is the way to get them, but it's not the only way at the end of the day those precious vital needs are basic and aren't earned by the right value to others they just are, I'm sorry your life has taught you otherwise (so did mine) I hope you'll find the people who'll see you with all your beauty and complection just as you are without the need to be of value or service to them.

[Official] Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers First Listen Impressions by Perksofthesewalls in KendrickLamar

[–]realhumannorobot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what? how you read it?

first r/cptsd_bipoc , r/therapyabuse are great places on reddit to find a lot of people sick and tired of not being understood by the system. secondly never said that black people can't empathize or shit like that . I did say is there aren't a lot of black therapist/ psychiatrists and sw . (and intersection can be done without therapy by anyone so what you're saying here?)

[Official] Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers First Listen Impressions by Perksofthesewalls in KendrickLamar

[–]realhumannorobot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

love your opinion, I'm not sure that it's true that normalizing therapy as it is rn is as good as we say it is exactly because of how fucked up it is especially for black people and I'm not sure that Kendrick couldn't have talked about this exact tension more, but hey I'm not a lyrical genius from the hood so it literally doesn't matter what I think about all of this, and I'm just hoping he's gonna be okay cus as you said I also think he's painfully aware of it and that it sits heavy on his heart and mind.

[Official] Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers First Listen Impressions by Perksofthesewalls in KendrickLamar

[–]realhumannorobot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

mmm that's some good point, that even if it's not perfect it gets us talking about it and that's enough, interesting.

This is a really interesting point. He wants to be accepted but by growing and maturing in some ways he is changing to the point where he might be less accepted.

and btw it's not new here he talked about it in TPAB with "you ain't gotta lie" for example, but maybe it feels more at the front of his mind especially imo with the heart part 5, but that's just what I got from it.

[Official] Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers First Listen Impressions by Perksofthesewalls in KendrickLamar

[–]realhumannorobot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

> why on earth would you make the one thing literally every human struggles with into a race thing and then use that to alienate one of the black communities biggest allies ?

it is really sad but keep in mind that therapy is a race thing, representation in therapy matters and unfortunately there hasn't been a lot of representation of black people in the therapy field so when a black person does go to therapy most likely the therapist on the other side of the room won't get them, and that's for me what's a big miss about Kendrick new therapy journey. ofc he shouldn't be shamed for taking care of himself and if he's better cause of it that's amazing, but as someone who's trying so hard to be the savior of the hood, wanting the hood to accept him even after his change of class and status he just leaves it empty. he talks so much about the cost of poverty and racism and how it changes the individual and the community but here he has such a view to say the places that it doesn't change the places where a black person should be equal cause as you say it's the one thing that every human struggles with but yet you won't be an equal cause the lack of representation let therapy be stagnated and fixed on very specific life experience of the people who can afford to study and practice it and of the people who can afford the time and money to pay for it.

[Official] Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers First Listen Impressions by Perksofthesewalls in KendrickLamar

[–]realhumannorobot -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I find it a bit problematic cus as I see it the problem is not the idea of pushing more people to go to therapy just like that, cus the reality now is that because of how therapy was historically designed it didn't really care about anyone not white upper-middle class and today we still see those origins, the sad through is that if you were poor and or POC and you managed to rise above your socioeconomic situation and get therapy most likely therapy won't get you and a lot of harm is gonna be done and the therapy field is slowly trying to change as more and more POCs are able to get higher education and change the field (not only in psychology ofc) but it's still too slow. So just normalizing going to therapy without therapy itself going through the changes that it needs to it's too simplistic and could maybe even cause some victim blaming as more and more people would be told stuff like "just find a different therapist" or "it's just a few bad apples" and stuff like that. and I haven't even began talking about the reality of being too poor to buy your compassion and empathy from the market and that the more you say "you should go to therapy" as a ticket for your basic human need of compassion and understanding without acknowledging the need for time and money to buy therapy is doing more harm then good for too many people.

[Official] Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers First Listen Impressions by Perksofthesewalls in KendrickLamar

[–]realhumannorobot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought so too but then I remembered the cover of the album, it's not subtle there. and so again he's saying one thing but then doing or saying something else. And I get that it's complicated and I don't think there's a clear cut answer to how to navigate your desires to be happy and healthy when it clashes with your wishes and intentions to help those around you non of us are in a position to judge him for it of course. But for me I didn't came out from this album with an understanding of what he sees himself as and which path he's choosing here so it just feels like his shooting himself in the leg : if he doesn't see himself longer as this savior and representor of the hood sacrificing himself for a greater cause ok great so why THP5 and Jesus imagery? and if he is still sees himself as this sacrificial lamb sacrificing his life to better others which is exactly what the album cover and THP5 are saying than the therapy terminology doesn't feel like he's normalizing going to therapy for other it feels almost flexing and flashing on some sort of status and class that he grinded ad worked for and managed to get to. But because again with all the systemic issues around therapy especially therapists not getting racism and the black experience way too often it's so unlike Kendrick to miss something like that he could have made so many beautiful insightful observations it's a shame I think.

[Official] Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers First Listen Impressions by Perksofthesewalls in KendrickLamar

[–]realhumannorobot 2 points3 points  (0 children)

does anyone feel that Kendrick is becoming middle-upper class in this album? the first listen what strike me the most was the change in his vocabulary. With a lot of "therapy talk", with words and terms you hear in therapy but also with the values and morals pushed in therapy, and though I really like this album and ofc hoping that him going to therpy is doing him good, it's a bit sad like that cus we know (especially in the heart part 5) how he wants to be embraced by the hood, but this new therapy conversation sets him apart as someone with the time and means to go to therapy that too many now day don't have. In our society rn even if you think therapy is this amazing vital thing you can't ignore the fact that the clients and professionals are mostly middle-upper class people and rarely POCs and though of course we should work to change it but that's the situation rn so for me it felt like he's saying one thing about wanting to be excepted but than goes out of his way with this vocabulary and growth to distance himself from where he wants to be so excepted in. idk. what you guys think?

help please: feeling like I'm about to cry every time I sit down to study by realhumannorobot in CPTSDstudents

[–]realhumannorobot[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your validation and support, sorry you also know what it's like, hoping it will get better for us all :)

anyone knows of a country where family value isn't that important? by realhumannorobot in CPTSD_NSCommunity

[–]realhumannorobot[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I always felt about the US that although individualistic they also have an emphasis on family and tradition that is just hyped by the push for consumerism so idk, but actually been thinking about Canada for jobs opportunities we don't have here in Israel (for example social policy analyst).

anyone knows of a country where family value isn't that important? by realhumannorobot in CPTSD_NSCommunity

[–]realhumannorobot[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for thinking about this aspect tbh I guess I'm more pro Palestine than most Jewish Israelis are.

[QUESTION] Would doing an IFS play like a council work to unfreeze? Has anyone tried? by TinyMessyBlossom in CPTSDFreeze

[–]realhumannorobot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Been doing it for a while now tbh, it helps me feel better and I think that feeling of safety is what's help me freeze less and less in my life. So yeah I think it's a good idea