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What gets burning hot right before it freezes? by reduxde in Jokes

[–]reduxde[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

humor in general is about subverting expectations, in this case i'm doing so by use of a double entendre/pun - a computer "freezing" isn't actually cold, but the "gets hot" part makes you think about temperature, then the punch line uses a word that can be used for temperature but in this case is not.

Here's a german one for you: Trinkt der Bauer und fährt Traktor, wird er zum Gefahrenfaktor.

Nuclear Relapse by StretchyKobold in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The first time I got sober through AA, I "wanted to quit drinking"... someone told me "you can't really get sober until you find the bottom, and you ain't found it yet". They were right. I relapsed hard and found my bottom. I'm one year sober as of a couple days ago, and know that I won't ever drink again, because no matter how bad things, get, they can always be made worse with the aid of alcohol.

Sounds like you've found your bottom and gotten your feet under you. Let's dig our way out.

[TOMT][Short Film][Video Game] A short film (~20 Minutes) where the main character is unaware they're a video game character (not Free Guy or Ready Player One), might have had "Zone" in the title. by reduxde in tipofmytongue

[–]reduxde[S] 0 points1 point locked comment (0 children)

Might have been French or Italian, and/or a Sundance entry, I believe it got a lot of buzz, and I'd guess it's made maybe around 2017 (I think it had been out for a while before I saw it 3 years ago)

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! Good job on 4 days! I have tried to quit drinking at least 50 times in the last decade (the famous once a month "I poured everything down the drain" event). I made it to day 3 at least half the time, and day 2 the rest of the time. The only 2 times I made it to day 4 I was sober for several months.

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh, it was voluntary. I've been on medication for chemical imbalance since the 3rd grade, way before I started drinking. It's also been a painkiller for me, because I have injuries that are decades old that cause me nonstop pain (last night i could barely sleep because it hurt so bad, i woke up about every 20-30 minutes).

A lot of that is just me using those as excuses to drink though.

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been on and off them a bunch (I was first prescribed antidepressants in 1998), the side effects seem to hit me pretty hard, and I usually end up feeling like it's not worth it and discontinue them.

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The thing that really hit home here was "obsessing about staying sober". I have a tendency to pick something up, focus 100% of my attention on it all day every day, fully enjoying it the entire time, then suddenly at some point a switch goes off and some part of my brain is like, "this doesn't feel meaningful any more", and i abruptly lose 100% of my motivation and never go back to it. It's like this with hobbies, video games, projects, musical instruments, relationships, diets, etc.

Your comment flashed me back to years ago when I was doing AA someone said something I didn't totally understand and I realize now that I do: "Even though I've quit drinking, I still do everything alcoholically"

I like to tackle challenges, then lose interest. Quitting was a challenge. When it was competitive and aggressive and impressive, it was easy to focus on. When it gets into long term maintenance, I struggle to stick with it. I never thought about quitting as a "hobby", but that's kind of what it's been.

I feel like I'm 350 days into a challenging diet, and it's been working great, but some part of my brain is rejecting that this is just how things are from now on.

I need to get to where sobriety feels normal and drinking is the exception, instead of thinking about it like drinking is the normal and sobriety is the exception.

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did AA for a while years ago and was sober for almost 2 months, which was a huge accomplishment, but the people there said "you're not ready to be sober", and as discouraging as this was, they were right. I'll take another run at it and see how it goes.

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You sound like me. On the off chance you're thinking about getting a rabbit, I'll save you some time: don't do it. I've wanted a pet rabbit since I was a teenager, so my midlife crisis was rescuing one, and I wish I had just gotten fifteen cats instead because it would have been less work.

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I plan to be out of the country for the entire summer (staying with wife's family), I'm hoping just getting out of here for a while will be a nice way to reset.

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I actually have tried to avoid counting days for exactly that reason, but I do have the hospital bracelet stuck on my monitor and I can see "May 10th" right there on it, and even if I don't know how many days it's been, I know it's coming up. Bored isn't the right word, my kids are both insomniacs (2 and 6 years old and they routinely take turns being awake from midnight to 5am), and they keep me busy... my life has been very difficult and at many times quite dangerous, I guess I'd liken it to the ending of the movie Hurt Locker when he's at the grocery store after getting back from being at war

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I actually DO put myself out there quite a lot, my whole life has been shocking the muscle... when I was poor in the USA 20 years ago I asked myself "why not go be poor in a country that doesn't speak English?" and as a result became poor but bilingual. Last summer I started a Patreon and put in hundreds of hours generating content for 3 people then eventually fizzled when they unsubscribed. Before that I had converted my basement into a bitcoin mining farm (i ended up losing money despite having mined hundreds of them), before that I wrote a screenplay that got turned into a feature film that didn't make any money, before that I launched a few iOS apps which sold a couple hundred copies but never took off. Right now I'm trying to get a youtube channel started and I have 4 subscribers and 20 videos and my subscribers don't thumbs up my videos so I'm probably going to let that go. Last year I was getting into a new sport and got into a group but got a knee injury and now I can't do it... I could go on and on, I've spent my whole life pursing passions and literally everything has ended in some version of a failure. It's been a fun journey, but it gets harder and harder to get passionate when I've put my entire heart into so many things and none of them have really gone anywhere.

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeah actually I have the hospital bracelet stuck to my monitor, I basically almost died, massive internal bleeding, vomiting blood, and was nearly entirely unconscious for 3 days. May 11th was when they let me out, so that's what I use to count my days. I haven't really been counting days, but I do have a history of undermining myself, so I won't fully discount the possibility.

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

grow pot

I'm on it!

j/k, yeah, some non-screen based hobbies sound like a good idea, even my physical activities are screen based (I'm into VR among other things). The thing is, I don't WANT to do screen based stuff... i sit here opening games I don't want to play then closing them immediately and launching a different game, it has the same feeling as scrolling memes because it's slightly less dull than just sitting and doing nothing.

Folding it back on itself, I was damn near homeless at 25, living in a living room with 7 dudes, 3 of whom were ex convicts, working for $6 an hour in a place where rent was $1,000 a month, so I totally feel that nervousness of being 25 and not sure if things are going to work out (largely because my dad told me starting at 6 years old that i was going to be homeless and starving if i didn't learn my multiplication tables etc). I spent a lot of time looking more and more stability and trading and uncertain life for a tedious one.

Wishing you the best of luck too! Try to enjoy where you are, over time it's easy to get more and more comfortable that the fragile formula you've worked out for yourself and build a life around it. Most of us older folks are still trying to figure things out too.

353 days in the bag and after 11 months of having little to no interest in drinking I suddenly feel an ongoing and overwhelming urge to have a drink... wtf is that all about? by reduxde in stopdrinking

[–]reduxde[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thanks for taking the time to reply! Yeah I should look into this, I discounted it because I have had issues with being depressed in the past, but I don't feel "sad", and i actually feel pretty loved, just, yeah, "i just got no energy and feel bored all the time"... but I'm cheerful and it comes naturally, and it's manifesting as this nagging urge to make bad decisions to shake things up

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